Dear Diary Might Be an MGoBlogger If… Comment Count

Seth April 6th, 2012 at 8:27 AM

From the Z to the O to the double-R O, he's the dude in the mask from Chem-Orgo. I love the mariachi band, and that the professor turned the "Z" slashes into a carbon chain, and that people are having a heated discussion regarding the professor's added hydroxyl group between the typical amoebic Youtube commenters.

It was a light week, by which I mean the board was mostly obsessed with Burke and the diaries, well, there's only one real "diary." It's about the Director's Cup and where Michigan stands right now, c/o WolverineBlue. Etc. The Blockhams, and Not Michigan Replay video—if you haven't before, now's your chance to learn the words (there's words!) to the Michigan Replay/MGoPodcast song. Let's move on to…

Best of the Board

…YOU'VE ACTUALLY GOTTEN EXCITED ABOUT BEING MENTIONED IN 'DEAR DIARY'

Boom: Jeff Foxworthy'd! The "You might be a _______" meme finally found its way to the board. A collection of some of the more pos-banged follows. You might be an MGoBlogger if

  • …your loved ones will only let you watch Michigan sporting events in public if you promise not to correct all the stupid people this time. (funandgun, paraphrased)
  • …you've both wanted to punch Magnus, and greatly appreciated the insight he's provided... at the same time (Nick Sparks)
  • …you are as star struck when you see Lloyd Brady or Mitch McGary Picture Guy as if you were to see someone like Charlie Sheen etc. (Raback Obama)
  • …you yell "Tacopants!" when a pass sails over a receiver's head (Nick Sparks)
  • …you respond to this post so that someday you can get to 100 points and be able to start your own thread. (Michigan Moonman)
  • …you scream out "MUPPETS!" in real life when minor things go your way, like finding bacon half price (maizedandconfused)
  • …you know who Ohio is, and who OHIO is, and what (NTM) means (ST3)
  • …you can find the F5 key in the dark in under 5 seconds (Lionsfan). Replies:
    "lol, you guys measure it in seconds. That's cute." –BlockM
    "You still have an F5 key? That's cute." –Michigan_Mike
  • …a cute girl at a bar says "Hello" and you wonder who's going to commit at the Spring scrimmage.
  • …if you have MGOBLOG set as a bookmark, click it, scan the page for updates, then decide to continue surfing the web and without even realizing it, click the MGOBLOG bookmark again instead of going to another site, and then scan the page for a second time in under 30 seconds (Chobee215)
  • …you could care less that you're a pre-madonna, a moran, or a looser for all intensive purposes. (OMG Shirtless, who is going to die for putting me through that again just now).
  • ...before posting, you ask yourself, is this safe for Mrs StephenRKass? (ST3)

…YOU'RE AN ALABAMA FAN WHO CAN'T RELATE TO OTHER TIDE FANS BECAUSE YOU DON'T SPEAK YOUTUBE COMMENTS

27000244

Via

Fact: 90% of Youtube comments are written by people from Alabama. Fact: the longer RollDamnTide hangs out around here the worse you feel about all of those great Alabama jokes. RDT wins Diarist of the Week without writing a diary because his work on the board did more for how people perceive people from Alabama than anything since Lynyrd Skynyrd (I'm including Forrest Gump.) Post the first is a rundown of how Bama boards view Michigan. That they think Pipkins is going to be a factor 4 weeks after arriving on campus shows they're probably even more 5-starry eyed as a fanbase than we are.* Post the second is about academics in the SEC after Morris Claiborne apparently scored between single-celled organism and Youtube commenter. Question: does the Wonderlic ask questions about organic chemistry and/or 18th century Alta California, or, like, other stuff you would learn in regular college courses?

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*I realize this is the second time I've knocked Pipkins recently. Please understand that this is not some personal vendetta but an agreement with my doctors to reduce expectations for 5-star recruits and be pleasantly surprised if they succeed, which even in cases of Charles Woodsons is hyper-rare before the Big Ten season begins.

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…YOU KNOW WHERE MOST FORMER M PLAYERS ARE COACHING

James Burrill Angell started a thread to track guys formerly in winged helmets who now wear headsets. I went on to post about Kastl but someone beat me to it. I don't know who "Admin" is who posted the Michigan High School Football Coaches Association position paper on recruiting (an interesting read that provides unintentional insight into things like private recruiting services, combines, and AAU events), but his profile image is this:

…so maybe one of our guys? Among FBS schools in the state Central and MSU have signed on. Also if you think your kid might be an NCAA athlete you should know by the time they graduate middle school:

"Understand the NCAA and NAIA Academic Eligibility rules before the student athletes ninth grade year begins.  The NCAA continues to add more restrictions to their eligibility process.  The Class of 2013 will now need 16 core classes to qualify as a D2 athlete.  The Class of 2015 will need a 2.3 GPA to qualify as a D1 athlete.  Academic eligibility begins with the first semester report card in the 9th grade.  All students and parents need to calculate the students NCAA CORE GPA every semester beginning with the 9th grade.

I'm drifting from the topic. Also: two spaces after a sentence means you probably learned to type before 1995, amirite?

ETC. To the people at UM Hospital: thanks for, you know, what you did to make sure I can keep having a dad for awhile, after three other hospitals on two continents couldn't/wouldn't. From "leaders" to "best," whatever superlative you use to describe yourselves it is probably 100% applicable.

Your Moment of Zen:

image

Comments

Seth

April 6th, 2012 at 9:45 AM ^

Eh. It's offseason, it's Friday morning, and they're pretty meta. Last year I started writing what became Museday in these spaces because things get so slow around now. Last week got 1558 to load the site when it was on top of the FP or click through, 937 before that, 1049, 1894, 1468, 1565, and 1744 in the weeks since the start of February. That's mediocre for an MGoBlog post; outstanding for a single-team sports blog.

Back when we were trying the "let's make people jump more" thing I was running at 2600+. Just sayin'.

I was thinking of not even bothering this week except Ace is out right now, and I hate it when we go 4 hours during a weekday without fresh content. If you have a suggestion of how I can make these better (past suggestions: moment of zen, best of the board) I love feedback.

Wolverine in Troy

April 6th, 2012 at 10:03 AM ^

"…you scream out "MUPPETS!" in real life when minor things go your way, like finding bacon half price (maizedandconfused)"

Just so we are clear, finding half-priced bacon IS NOT A MINOR EVENT.

 

 

 

MGoLifer

April 6th, 2012 at 10:10 AM ^

...you read a generally well-written, funny diary post that adds to your morning but feel the need to point out the misuse of the word "looser."

MGlobules

April 6th, 2012 at 10:13 AM ^

pointed out. Making ourselves feel superior even if we're not bazillionaires because football players are stoopid--as the blogger who broke the big story seemed to be doing--oughta be a little suspect in a place like this, anyway.

Not that we're not all subject to, even allowed, our contradictions. But thisisMichiganetcetera.

bluebelle

April 6th, 2012 at 10:17 AM ^

...also saved my dad's life ten years ago. After he spent five months in another hospital, we finally got him transferred to UM and he was there for a month before coming home and making a nearly full recovery. I feel so grateful for the ten years I've had with my father since then, and I can't say enough about the great people at the UM hospital who made that happen. I'm glad they helped your dad, too.

profitgoblue

April 6th, 2012 at 10:55 AM ^

. . . you missed that early Saturday morning thread and are both upset about it and considering changing your weekend routine to make sure you don't miss Saturday morning threads.

 

Gob Blueth

April 6th, 2012 at 11:00 AM ^

Also saved my life.  Well sorta.  It's debatable.  But I did stumble into the ER unable to breathe, and left in better condition.  Fantastic facility, great doctors, plus I also had a really hot nurse.

denardogasm

April 6th, 2012 at 12:13 PM ^

I didn't even realize they stopped teaching kids to put two spaces after a period.  I just thought a lot of people were bad writers haha.

/I still think this

Seth

April 6th, 2012 at 1:41 PM ^

Autospacing makes it irrelevant. My first typing class we learned two spaces after a period, but that was before autospacing. About the time I was in college this was finally standardized by the AP as "don't doublespace after a period, period." So that's 10+ years ago.

Wendyk5

April 6th, 2012 at 6:04 PM ^

I learned to type in 1980, and I stopped with the double space over time, I think through reading, and not through an intentional knowledge of the AP style book. By the way, I'm a writer and Strunk & White is my stylistic bible. I don't know their policy on the subject. 

M-Dog

April 6th, 2012 at 9:42 PM ^

You may be an MGoBlogger . . . if you see video clips of Kate Upton dancing nearly naked and it makes you think of college football, not sex.

And you are OK with this.