BlogPoll Ballot Week 11... Official

Submitted by Brian on November 9th, 2005 at 3:10 PM

Introducing the Fraud Squad.

I will take this opportunity to force BlogPoll voters to look deep into the sausagey bowels of some of the teams they're voting for.

UCLA LSU Texas Tech Auburn Rutgers Cal
Best Win Oklahoma Florida Texas A&M South Carolina Pitt or UConn Arizona
Worst Loss Arizona Tennessee Texas Georgia Tech Illinois! Oregon State
Functional DNPs 5 4 6 6 4-ish 6
non-FDNP Record 3-1 3-1 2-1 1-2 2-3 0-3
Cheap Shot Transitive property of college football indicates that UC-Davis would pwn you. Wins over ASU, Auburn were total flukes. Made Michigan's mobile quarterback defense look sweet. Uh, you suck and stuff. ILLI- FREAKIN' -NOIS Quarterback's name spelled backward is "HELP ME I CANNOT THROW-YA"
Advice 12-ish or worse. 11-12. #22 with a bullet. Squeak them in at the bottom. Omit with ferocity. Omit until they beat a non-shortbus riding team.

I have bitchslapped the above teams in my ballot. I recommend you do the same.

Rank Team Snark
1 Texas Why #1? To me USC and Texas are equal, so I will vote with the minority.
2 Southern Cal No offense.
3 Penn State Defense wins championships, but I also like it when the defense comes with an offense.
4 Georgia DNP.
5 Miami Overtaken by the spirit of Bo Schembechler on Saturday.
6 Alabama Score an offensive touchdown.
7 Virginia Tech But I wanted to like you so much.
8 Ohio State Ugh. Pending 1-4 against Tressell == awful.
9 Notre Dame Listen to Michael here; this offense is not almighty, and SEC defenses are pretty good. Still, ND has been consistently good. Few teams can say that.
10 Oregon Main beneficiary of this carnage below.
11 LSU Running out of snark!
12 UCLA Finally got what was coming to them.
13 Wisconsin A better team than they showed against PSU. Tamba Hali was a terrible matchup problem and PSU defense is one of the best in the country.
14 Florida Yeah, well, Vandy... I dunno. Weird day for the middle of the poll.
15 Florida State No QB problem rears up again. Was fortunate to beat Miami.
16 Georgia Tech Put up or shut up coming soon.
17 Fresno State Please beat USC. It would be sweet.
18 West Virginia I guess.
19 Michigan DNP.
20 Texas Tech Has proven it can annihilate terrible pass defenses.
21 Auburn Still haven't played anyone.
22 Minnesota Mmmm, yards.
23 TCU Still suspicious of that SMU loss.
24 Colorado But meeem I wanted to vote for Spurrier.
25 Northwestern Big Ten bias? Who else down here has beaten an 8-2 BCS team?

Dropped Out: BC(#13)

Games I Saw: VT-Miami, UW-PSU, Alabama-Miss State, ND-UT)

Help Requested: #11-16 are drawn out of a hat mostly.

Update: Sadly, had to excise South Carolina in favor of Colorado. If you're wondering about 'Bama, my "defense wins championships" statement was an ironic one. If Alabama manages to defensive touchdown its way through the SEC undefeated they'll be #3; as long as there's some projection aspect, though, I project that a couple field goals will not be sufficient to beat all comers.