If Potential Michigan Coaches Were Chicks

Submitted by seniorbearcat on

 

Rich Rodriguez

 

Rodrguez is the Drunk Lion's Chick. Great body and a total hottie (Awesome Offense), but you best watch yourself or you might get cursed out and hit by a thrown beer bottle or batteries (Defense is defiantly a problem).

 

Chris Peterson

A hot Catholic Schoolgirl is what Chris Peterson is. Great body (Awesome Offensive ) and you'd definitely want to hook up with her (wins a lot of football games). She is the hottest by far out of all her friends but is untouchable. 

 

Jim Harbaugh

Jim Harbaugh is the girl that you'd give up body organs to sleep with (perfect fit for Michigan football coach?) but who constantly plays you like a fiddle because she knows you'll do anything to get with her. Unfortunately for you, the ball is in her court with all her options. 

 

Les Miles

Yep, Les Miles is the "Let go" chick. She started out as an absolutely hottie when you first started dating (2007 coaching search?), but damn is she letting herself go now that you've been married awhile (football is slipping and you’re not getting any younger).

 

Brady Hoke

Yep, you are the butterface of the bunch Brady. Don't get me wrong, you have some great assets (good football coach), but you don't have a very appealing face (Is your resume better than RR’s was 3 years ago?).

 

Pat Fitzgerald

Fitzgerald is the hot nerdy girl. She is a total nerd (academics) but has a banging body (done well as a head football coach at a school like Northwestern). Is that good enough for Michigan?

 

Jon Gruden

Ah Gruden. You are most certainly the "Legendary Cougar" of the potential coaches. The Legendary Cougar is still hot (lot of NFL people want him as a head coach), but the glory days are slowly drifting further and further away (NFL champ 8 years ago but average results thereafter). You have been out of coaching for 2 years, but who wouldn't want to hook up with her?

MGoCards

January 4th, 2011 at 10:50 AM ^

Ah, the old "it's not sexism if I can find a woman who thinks it's funny" trick. Works every time! Also, try out "some of my best friends are _______." I tell ya, these are like Kryptonite to someone who thinks they've pointed out something patently offensive. 

WolvinLA2

January 5th, 2011 at 8:14 PM ^

I agree that I don't want MGoBlog to turn into "Tits Tits Titis" or the shit they put on Bleacher Report articles, but this was one thread and it was aptly titled.  Based on what you've said, you probably knew you'd be offended, but you clicked through anyway.  Like much of the internet, if you know it's not for you, stay away. 

And butterface is not a hideously sexist term.  A dude can totally be a butterface.  In fact, I'm pretty sure WifeinLA2 has called Paulie D a butterface before. 

Feat of Clay

January 4th, 2011 at 1:26 PM ^

You are baffled that someone might be offended?

I'm not offended; I'm in the "rolling my eyes, shrugging" camp.   But I'm surprised that you think no sane MGoBlogger could possibly object to photos being posted solely because they feature nice tits, with the occasional comment about how un-bangable the chick is given her wide ass or the mismatch between her barely-acceptable face and her primo funbags.  On a board that prides itself on being known for its intellectual & witty analysis of college football.

Fact is, some people would cock an eyebrow over it.  or even feel offended, or label if sexist.  Not all of them tomatoes with funbags of their own!  That's the "weird," "politically correct" world we live in, go figure.

mtzlblk

January 4th, 2011 at 1:18 PM ^

to your post, with the 's' standing for sanctimonious.

Reactions like this are what give legitimate 'PC' concerns a bad name. Not everything is offensive and not everyone is offended by the same content.

There is room for humor, try it out sometime. People are people. As long as there have been human beings there have been girls that seek attention by wearing skimpy clothes and presenting themselves in a fashion that they believe will attract guys. Does that mean that all women are or should be like that? No. Does the post indicate that all women are and should be like that? No.

Your knee-jerk reaction to a simple post that takes a humored approach to comparing coaches to types of pretty girls, as if it was somehow offensive is exactly what makes it more difficult for people that are trying to actually make legitimate changes in people's perceptions. You take things too far and create an overall view of 'PC' as humorless, ridiculous and completely out of touch with reality.

In short:

-Changing terms from things like handicapped/disabled, or retarded, or whatever to something else, or perhaps not labeling them at all = good.

-Removing real systemic terms and biases to women and minorities = good

-overreacting to any and everything that is potentially offrensive to some group of people somewhere = bad

 

Happy Jack

January 4th, 2011 at 11:18 AM ^

lighten up.  it's a joke.  i hate when people rail against obvious light hearted humor when there are real examples of sexism in the world.  let me put it this way,  richard pryor joking about white or black people isn't racist but beating up or killing someone because of their race is.  just like not hiring a woman or paying her less or treating her as inferior is sexist and this post isn't.  it's a joke, laugh a little.

Happy Jack

January 4th, 2011 at 11:20 AM ^

lighten up.  it's a joke.  i hate when people rail against obvious light hearted humor when there are real examples of sexism in the world.  let me put it this way,  richard pryor joking about white or black people isn't racist but beating up or killing someone because of their race is.  just like not hiring a woman or paying her less or treating her as inferior is sexist and this post isn't.  it's a joke, laugh a little.

ND Sux

January 4th, 2011 at 10:39 AM ^

although I'd do 'em all (not the actual coaches, their representative hotties!). 

Any thread featuring hotties without a lot of threads is a good one. 

Bb011

January 4th, 2011 at 12:29 PM ^

Shit, I'd take that nerdy girl any day.

 

 

Actually after this thread  I'll just stay with the girl I already have(RR) and not risk getting shut down by the others to only have no one.