Frank Martin said it beautifully. I coached youth soccer for years. I would have a meeting with the parents before every season and the key message was this: It was my job to deal with the refs and they were not to say or yell anything about them And it was my job to run the team, which meant I would correct the players when necessary. Their job was to provide positive energy to their child and to the team.
After a few seasons, and several confrontations with parents (in private and not in front of the team) everyone came to realize I meant it. And they became the best parents in the league.
As a volunteer baseball coach for 8 years I was just happy if some of the parents shook my hand and said thanks after the last game.
Great points. Wonder why he enjoys embarrassing 18-20yr old kids on national tv. He's basically the Brian Kelly of bball.
He's loud as hell but from what I've seen it's always positive/motivational or specific/constructive. That's a coach players will love forever.
The coaches that yell like fans (based on outcomes not process, are personally critical) are the bad ones. A lot of guys grew up revering Bobby Knight and walked away with all the wrong lessons.
as a teacher there are a healthy mix of annoying parents with children that are obnoxious, but also many have children that are amazing and go on to do great things. There's a lot of things that we think that aren't supported by evidence. This book is a good reading on the subject.
Proper perspectives.
He absolutely nailed it about officiating. Growing up, I ref'd soccer up through college and would do fairly high level games (big travel tournaments, mens league games as a 16yo, etc...) but also local rec leagues for the money and the opportunity to get outside and get some exercise. It never ceased to amaze me how parents/coaches would think I gave a crap who won their game. I mean, parents losing their GD minds over thinking I missed the ball touching a kid's arm in some under 12 travel team. Or parents threatening me and my linesmen after the game on the way to the parking lot. Tangentially related, reffing intramural basketball at Michigan was maybe the most thankless job of all. It was like $10/game and 97% of those dudes thought they were playing in the NBA finals.
i reffed intamural games at UM too. the freshmen games were the worst. they constantly complained. and i actually said to one dude during a game, hey if i called all the fouls i'm seeing there would be no one left on the court.
that said, the womens' games were the best. for some reason, they almost never complained.
never had a parent brace me, but candidly i'm big enough that most would have to think twice about getting too animated. i do think it also makes a big difference where you coach/ref.
Respect. Seems like a good Dad.
My Dad is amazing, too. Hats off to Michigan fathers!! Pass the a-Maizeing on!
I've been coaching 10 & 12U softball the past 2-3 years since my daughter started playing and thankfully I haven't seen a ton of parents being huge problems. if anytihng, it's been some poor coaching that i've seen. we're pretty far upstate in NY so there aren't a ton of parents with the time/knowledge to give some good coaching for the level of the kids i've seen.
if anything, it's been a few parent/coaches who are a little too intense relative to the ability of the kids.
My daughter was one of the worst players on her rec soccer team like at age 11. Other parents apparently voiced frustration about her, or so he told me when I asked him why he wasnt playing her. League rules say all must play equally, and she wanted to play. I let it go on for a few games before I asked him. Didn't want to be one of "those" parents, but I wanted to know. Couldn't understand why he ignored rules based on other parents. She stopped playing soccer after that season.
We wonder why a lot of kids these days grow up to be self-absorbed, entitled douchebags? Much of the time, look no further than their parents. Too often parents are trying to be their kid’s friend instead of their parent, wiping the drool away from their lips and telling them they’ll fix everything when they don’t get what they want. They want to be the cool parents.
I hear about it all too often from my wife, who’s a teacher. She’s got parents kicking down her door wondering why their child is failing her math class or why they didn’t get selected for the gifted program. It’s always someone else’s fault, or there’s no way their child is stupid enough to be failing math. Someone is out to get their child and is holding them back, because they can’t possibly do anything wrong.
Sometimes parents don’t even consider the possibility that their child is just lazy. Or not as good as the other kids.
http://www.miaminewtimes.com/news/report-old-new-times-investigation-ke…
New found respect for this guy .