This Week’s Obsession: The Red Cedar Survey

This Week’s Obsession: The Red Cedar Survey Comment Count

Seth October 27th, 2016 at 3:41 PM

MGoReader GameBoy discovered a thread on the Red Cedar Message Board ($) where the denizens of the afore mentioned troll kingdom were given the opportunity to ask a (probably apparently not fake; sorry Dizzo) Wolverine some questions. Some are good questions, some are, well, we’re talking about the kind of wretches who hoot at the cleverness of adding “sc” to “UM” because then it’s like they’re saying algae instead of the University of Michigan. Get it? Algae is gross, right?*

They’re not great questions—consider the source—but since it’s rivalry week we decided we might as well try to give some full answers. MGoStaff were invited to answer what they pleased. The names and mangling of our common language have not been changed, because nobody here is innocent.

*[MGoReaders: Nobody wants to read about your world-changing research on the emissions-controlling properties of algaeforms ].

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1. DantIzzoNio: Will Jeem go for two after every score?

Seth: Only if the chart says so.

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2. Is Wilton Speight good?

Seth: Ask again later. We've got two good games and a handful of various shades of iffy. My guess is he started taking hits and lost his mechanics, but used the bye week to shore some of that back up. Harbaugh has an extraordinary track record with quarterbacks so he'll get what he can out of Speight, which is probably a poor man's Ben Roethlisberger when's all said and done. Sophomore year Navarre is a present comparison, or for a Spartan example, Ryan Van Dyke. You can win with those guys, but you don't win BECAUSE of those guys.

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3. Will your punter wear Stickum?

Seth: Hard to tell, we rarely punt anymore.

[After the jump, we take some of these seriously.]

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Dear Diary Has Somebody Out There Giving Us a Bad Name

Dear Diary Has Somebody Out There Giving Us a Bad Name Comment Count

Seth February 28th, 2014 at 10:14 AM

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We believe the guy with the fake mullet managed to convince him it is, while acknowledging the recently greater popularity of Freesia. [Fuller]

Molecules of competitiveness. I don't get all of the WWE references in the Best and Worst columns. For example, would this qualify as a bodyslam or a chair to the face:

MSU hit a school record 17 3 pointers against Purdue, including 6 by Gary Harris. In their losses to Nebraska and UM, they hit 14 total out of 47, with Harris going 5 of 20. Apparently, those wrists, shoulders, and ankles were fine on Thursday but that long bus ride between East Lansing and Ann Arbor jostled all the bones out of sorts again.

Chair to the face I'm guessing, since most of the momentum was generated by Izzo's bouncing off the ropes, and bronxblue just put a hard object in the way. Either way it's pretty entertaining.

101609_SPT_U-M Madness_MRM_
Scientists think Morgan and Morris may have cohabitated in ancient Crisler, and may have even interacted.

Creationists claim Jordan Morgan is less than 4,000 years old. The debate rages as ClearEyesFullHeart presented evidence that a Jordan Morgan-like creature was living in Crisler back when it was still called an arena. What appeared to be advice to competitors was found on cuneiform tablets that match Morgan's particular type of swagger. CEFH also suggested that J-Mo-anthropus may have domesticated dogs, and participated in battles against the ancient Greeks.

How bad can we make it? There is a singularly small type of person who sees a sexual assault expulsion and jumps for joy for the hammer with which he can pound a sports rival program on internet message boards. All fanbases have them, all fanbases are embarrassed by them. The best way to manage them is if the thought leaders, i.e. the journalists, maintain a high level of integrity and investigation, focusing on facts, providing context, and discouraging over-speculation. Good journalism is a thousand times better than good P.R.

If you're wondering why it's Sparties, of all roaches, doing most of the scuttling, it's because their media are 30% trolls themselves, 60% too biased to consider fighting the trolls, and the remainder aren't trying all that hard. I removed, at last count 13, fight-back threads this and last week, because there's nothing to be gained by criticizing the journalistic integrity of Mike Valenti or Graham Couch or Eric Thomas, etc. There's a certain type of person you just remove from the message board; if somebody's given him a broadsheet or a highly trafficked url or a 15,000-watt microphone instead, roll your eyes and ignore it.

The least we could hope for is for those without a dog in the fight to not be lazy with the publically available facts. Like how FERPA works (BiSB's fisk of MLive's attempt to get in on the Daily's glory).troll Or that the Ed Dept.'s involvement began when they used Title IX to tell the university to institute the policy they're reviewing, not last week, and that at last count 24 universities' policies were under investigation, with two more completed and seven more have had recent controversies. Or that a few minutes on the chief complainant's blog raises obvious credibility concerns that he should have to address when interviewed.

The Daily has continued to produce the best reporting on the subject, while the Detroit papers, SI, Huffington Post (to their credit they at least edited their article at the end with suggested corrections), and now Mlive have, while trying to play catch-up on the students, been caught biting at the chum of shock value while burying or ignoring the easy context. Prediction: in 10 years half of the metro-Detroit media will be replaced by former Dailyites and bloggers. Most of those who haven't will cater to Michigan State fans, because roaches are survivors.

Etc. Michigan is 98% to hang a banner. Ron Utah says the position changes are a Hail Mary and this inspires…confidence? Six of eight is a narrative-beater. DCAlum provided his eyewitness account of the MSU lining up fiasco. Goal-by-goal vs. Minnesota was too depressing for me to even read this week. LSA columns on win probability and home versus away stats.

[Jump for the best of the board, and the title reference]

Comments

Unverified Voracity Is Sportmanteaing

Unverified Voracity Is Sportmanteaing Comment Count

Brian October 3rd, 2012 at 5:10 PM

Marve: available? Robert Marve's ACL isn't completely torn this time so he may give it a go this weekend, which would give Purdue a second option if TerBush struggles. Emphasis on "may":

Marve said he participated in the full practice for 1st time since his latest injury. As for the game "I hope I can help out some" #Purdue

If he ends up in the game that's probably good news since it sounds like it will be a desperation move by the Boilers.

dangit should have titled this section "marvailable?"

Oklahowat. Of all the crazy things to do to save a couple lousy bucks:

Four-star offensive tackle Matt Beyer (San Antonio/Reagan) had been mentally preparing for two weeks, but that didn't make the news any easier to take.

Beyer said he was told Tuesday by Oklahoma offensive tackles coach Bruce Kittle that his scholarship offer to Oklahoma will not be honored, Beyer confirmed to SoonerNation on Thursday night.

Beyer, who committed to the Sooners on July 2, has been forced to give up football because he was diagnosed with the spinal-cord condition cervical stenosis about three weeks ago.

The Bylaw Blog notes that OU could sign him and immediately give him a medical scholarship. So… like… why not do that? Your program + Rinaldi profile of this guy – cost of scholarship > Your program + perception you're heartless + cost of scholarship. I don't get it, man.

Morgan head thing. Michigan is very cautious about head injuries:

Morgan said the word "concussion" never was used by doctors, but his symptoms were enough that he was held out against the Minutemen.

"Just got knocked and was a little out of it for a little bit," the sophomore said Tuesday. "A lot of it was precautionary, just doctors making sure on everything. But I haven't had any symptoms since and I'm feeling good.

"I haven't had a head injury, so I didn't know what to expect I guess going into it. But the doctors were really positive and honest through the whole thing and I was real upfront and told them exactly how I was feeling every day."

A plague of missed assignments. ND film review was ugly. Not for me. Not just for me. Also the players:

Against Notre Dame, the Michigan offense had 23 of those missed assignments, according to redshirt junior tackle Taylor Lewan, a number he called “unbelievably high.” The mistakes could range from missed blocks to improper reads to poor communication.

“You should have one or two maybe in a game,” Lewan said. “I’ve never seen (23 missed assignments) happen before, personally.”

Yeesh. Two were on the Smith INT, I'm sure, and various others are in Denard's lap. I hope they get these things fixed, because I don't like watching games like the Notre Dame game. Also I enjoy oxygen and water.

Epic troll? So I'm thinking about making some sort of George Clinton joke about this article on Denard Robinson…

Denard Robinson's funk 'lasted for days' after Michigan loss to Irish

…and end up looking at the comments. I've just read a bunch of "Ken M" trolling posts and this sets off the alarm bells: 

Chuck Luck · Top Commenter

"Denard Robinson's funk 'lasted for days' after Michigan loss to Irish".

Glad this young man is not in the military, people die when their fellow soldiers act like this.

Troll: successful.

In a nutshell. The SF Weekly profiles Bleacher Report and in doing so captures the thing's essence:

The exemplar of contrarian thinking offered within the site's curriculum is a Bleacher Report article titled "Why Tom Brady Is the Most Overrated Quarterback in NFL History."

This piece epitomizes much of what frustrates the site's detractors. The article's author, an affable 19-year-old college sophomore named Zayne Grantham, tells us he still thinks Brady is an overrated "system quarterback" who largely succeeds thanks to his team's capable defenses. (The New England Patriots advanced to the Super Bowl last year with the 31st-ranked defense in terms of passing and overall yardage in a 32-team league.) But even Grantham doesn't believe Brady to be history's most overrated quarterback: "In hindsight, I may not have used that headline. I'll be one of the first to say he's one of the best quarterbacks we've ever seen."

And there you have it: Anyone baited into responding to these hyperbolic stories finds themselves debating a non-starter argument with a teenager from Shreveport who doesn't even buy the premise of his own article.

Somewhere in the Bleacher Report salt mines is the next generation's Drew Sharp, who will be forced to write slideshows about the top tittays in tennis and why LeBron James is bad at basketball until he gets paid 600 dollars a month to write SEO filler under predetermined headlines. Don't tell me you don't believe in the narrative of progress.

Shades of that Illinois game, except weirder. Remember way back in the day when refs botched two massive fumble calls against Illinois and publicly apologized afterwards? This got Michigan fans in a lather because they'd experienced their share of refereeing mishaps without getting a reassuring pat on the shoulder, and did nothing to actually correct the issue. Well, in the Big 12 they've "apologized profusely" for this:

That's a lot more ambiguous than two clearly wrong calls against Illinois. Q: why are Oklahoma State fans taping horrible angles on TV the best we can do here? Shouldn't there be some cameras on the LOS, like, for all games?

[UPDATE: Big 12 says "never happened."]

Compher "marquee." The USHL just had a prospects game and reviews are rolling in. This is from The Hockey News:

J.T. Compher, LW – U.S. NTDP (USHL)
Along with Fasching, Compher is the marquee name on the NTDP this season and though he doesn’t have his teammate’s beastly size, Compher gets in the mix. At the AAPG, the University of Michigan commit demonstrated a dogged determination around the puck, never giving up on a play. He’ll be one of the team’s leading scorers this season. Draft eligible in 2013.

Michigan Hockey Net rounds up reactions to Compher, Allen, and Downing and provides season-to-date stats in his weekly hockey recruiting update.

Exit CCHA. MLive has a good article on the end of the CCHA. Relevant bit on the Mason Cup:

“I’ve been asked a lot about that. Does the final winner take it? Just like the Stanley Cup, there are two Mason Cups. There’s one where (current CCHA tournament champion) Western Michigan has it on display and we have another we keep on display at the Joe (Louis Arena) during the season.”

Pletsch said no option is being kept off the table. He said he has contacted the Hockey Hall of Fame to gauge the interest there. He said he has also thought about giving the Mason family one of trophies to keep.

In a respectful gesture Pletsch said he has even reached out to the Big Ten about possibly donating the trophy to the league that ultimately led to the CCHA’s demise.

“If they wanted it we would consider donating it to them,” he said.

I doubt any of the other five teams in the newly formed Big Ten are going to be enthusiastic about that idea. Given the hodgepodge of trophies they created for football, the new trophy will probably be the Comley-Markell-Gadowsky Cup.

Etc.: As part of my trip to Georgia I got to deploy my best Marvin the Paranoid Android impression in an AIRBHG t-shirt. Stuffing the Passer. Hockey season preview from Yost Built.

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