bizzaro world big ten

Things discussed:

• “I think we should put Paul Bunyan in a wood chipper, and if we lose next year hand them back the sawdust.”
• Lewerke was definitely injured; no idea why the story isn’t straight
• I think he’s on Urban Meyer’s meds
• Like most of the team he’s not on the same page
• So many opportunities to pull away early.
• Kwity and Uche are recreating Gary in the aggregate
• Five or six opportunities to pull on zone read plays where MSU had nobody for it
• State’s run defense threw in the towel in the 4th
• Don’t like the can’t hit the QB in the knee rule
• March of the Rockettes: point was to show up late and make Michigan leave the field
• What was Harbaugh’s role in this? Saying the truth too loud? Delany’s statement is exactly what Harbaugh said, and the Big Ten wouldn’t have looked at it if he hadn’t said something, so why the reprimand?
• How much more effort did they put into this than Max Bullough, the captain of the team, getting suspended for the Rose Bowl? Is there anything more pathetic than the MSU beat? Just a bunch of shameless bootlickers
• Mark Dantonio is the Elmer Gantry of NCAA football.
• Rondale Moore is the Truth.
• Ohio State: Meyer doesn’t know how to run without a running quarterback
• Marcus Ray: would he call Michigan the best team in the Big Ten if they had losses to Northwestern, Eastern Michigan, and Missouri?

You can catch the entire episode on Michigan Insider's podcast stream on Podbean.

Segment two is here. Segment three is here.

THE USUAL LINKS

• Helpful iTunes subscribe link
• General podcast feed link
• Direct download link
• What's with the theme music?

Michigan State’s used to double-digit losses to Michigan, but five digits is gonna hurt

Hey kids: I am headed out to NYC today. That plus knee rehab equals no time (no time). Mathlete will hit you up later today. It's June, be chill. Posting should continue as normal after today.

From reader Will Gallagher comes this item:

Hi there. I'm watching a Japanese movie and halfway through, I was surprised to see the main character wearing a blue shirt with maize lettering that says "The Lord is my Shepherd, but Bo is my coach." Just in case you needed any more MGoShirt ideas. Screenshot included.

I've asked after what this movie actually is… but probably can't put it in the store since it's obviously someone else's idea. [ED: "Rainbow Song." From 2006, which makes that shirt even weirder.]

For now, the Asian pop culture reference scoreboard stands at Iowa two (a terrible indie video and Girls' Generation), Michigan one. Unless you want to count a dozen Korean pop stars snuggling with your helmet more than a shirt, which fair enough.

Dollin' up the boxes.

I have neither enough points to start a thread nor the requisite photoshop skills to make this look right, but see attached and tell me if that is or is not an improvement... I like the full "UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN" myself, but could be talked in to the block M. It needs something, with the stands full you can't even tell its Michigan Stadium.

I think the emailer is right: the boxes, while gorgeous on the outside, leave a little something to be desired once you're inside the stadium. They could use some maize trim and a simple, non-halo-esque logo or notification that this is a university. Professionally photoshopped, of course.

Another thing to do is to put the retired/legends numbers on one of the boxes like they do many other places. Before the boxes, Michigan never had anywhere to put said names. Now they do.

Also, when are we going to get the long-waited crazy person bleachers on top of those things? "See Michigan play football from the moon!" That's a freebie, Hunter S Lochmann. Call me. We'll push that envelope… to the moon. Call me, seriously. I have ideas for days.

Judging by the relative volume of email I've gotten on this, the entire universe read this FoxSports story and went "wha?"

The Green Bay Packers aren't the only ones who are interested in Greg Paulus.

According to sources close to the situation, the former Duke point guard was in Ann Arbor on Tuesday meeting with Michigan football coach Rich Rodriguez about the possibility of playing this season for the Wolverines.

How can Paulus have eligibility at all, let alone this year? Apparently NCAA transfer rules don't apply if you switch sports and neither do eligibility limits. There's just the five year "clock" that starts when you enroll in college.

Though bizarre, this isn't totally insane. Paulus was actually a big time football recruit with offers from a number of major powers, including Michigan, before he chose the dark side. (And poorly: how many 6'2" white point guards are in the NBA?) Since he's got only one year left Michigan could put him on the team without adversely affecting next year's recruiting class. It's basically a free quarterback.

The only downside is being associated with this:

The great worry is that four years at Duke have burned this sort of behavior in Paulus' head and he'll fall over when pass rushers come upfield or, you know, the running back brushes him when he's trying to get the handoff.

Paulus hasn't played a down of football in four years, so the article's suggestion that he could "come in and play immediately" is more foreboding than a hopeful. Forcier isn't losing his job to this stopgap unless he's miraculously good. If Paulus comes and if he sees the field he's probably going to be really bad, but since there's a chance his really bad is less really bad than some walk-on's really bad there doesn't appear to be a reason to say no*.

If he does come don't revise your season projections either way.

*(Except for aesthetic ones embedded above.)