when all through the Big House
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;
The helmets were hung in Columbus with care,
In hopes that bowl eligibility soon would be theirs;
The players were nestled all snug in their hotel beds;
While visions of turnovers danced in their heads;
And Greg in his sweatshirt, and I in my cap,
Had just settled our brains for a long season's nap,
When out on the field there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.
Away to the press box I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,
Gave a lustre of midday to the Horseshoe below,
When what to my wondering eyes did appear,
But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer,
With a little old driver whose pride was stuck in his craw,
I knew in a moment he must be Jim Harbaugh.
Better than Buckeyes, his Michigan Men, and he struck fear in their hearts and in the entire Big Ten:
Now Spartans, now Gophers, now Wildcats, Terrapins, Hoosiers, Badgers and Fighting Illini,
On Nittany Lions, on Scarlet Knights, on Boilermakers, Cornhuskers, and Hawkeyes, to the top of the Conference, to the top of the nation, and Michigan fans will have such jubilation!
As footballs when he was a quarterback fly, when caught by receivers make our opponents cry, back to Ann Arbor Harbaugh, he flew, with a sleigh full of championships, and winged helmets too!
And then in a twinkling I heard in Schembechler Hall, Harbaugh's arrival straight and tall.
As I drew in my head and was turning around, in came Harbaugh with a bound!
He was dressed all in Michigan gear, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A book of good plays he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a pedler just opening his pack.
His eyes—how they twinkled! his dimples, how merry!
His bowl games were like roses, his Super Bowl like a cherry!
His broad skinny mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And he guaranteed us a win for the next seasons to go;
The stem of a rose he held tight in his teeth,
And his Block "M" hat, it encircled his head like a wreath;
He had a broad face and a demeanor like Bo,
And he came to put a whooping on Dantonio.
He was determined and driven, and sure of himself,
And I cheered when I saw him, in spite of myself
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And kicked Urban's ass, then turned on the grass,
And pumping a fist high into the air,
A rousing chorus of the Victors he sang with great flair!
He sprang to the locker room, to his Team gave a whistle,
And went to drink bourbon with President Schlissel.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he ran out of sight,
“Michigan's back, and all is just right!"
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