"Jim's a tough guy and you can see his personality is all over this football team," Fitzgerald said.
|41 min 30 sec ago||24-16 Michigan||
Comes down to final minutes
|18 hours 23 min ago||You make it sound like he was tortured and abused.||
Back after RR was fired, one of the frequent callers into WTKA's afternoon show said live, on-air, that he wanted to torture Rodriguez. And the douchebag host at the time laughed.
I have no doubt that this numbskull would have done it if he'd had the opportunity.
|1 day 21 hours ago||The hiring of GERG was absolutely incomprehensible||
And it shows just how bizarrely indifferent RR was to competent defense.
RR was coming off a totally disastrous 3-9 season, with a large portion of the Michigan fan base already calling for his head. Shafer gets canned at the end of the season, unfairly or not, and all of us here were waiting expectantly to hear that RR had hired a top gun DC soon thereafter. December days go by, and nothing happens. I was scratching my head, since I'd figured that the sooner he gets his guy in, the sooner the implementation of the DC's plans will happen.
It wasn't until after the freaking coaching meetings in January that RR announces his hire: Greg Robinson.
You know, the guy who had just helmed Syracuse to the worst five years in program history, with one mind-numbing loss after another. The guy who referred to "The Little Engine That Could" in his last Syracuse presser after being fired.
I still clearly remember where I was when I heard that RR had hired Robinson, and I yelled out loud in my car to the only passenger, my dog. "You're fucking kidding me....we're dooooomed."
|2 days 2 hours ago||"Well over $200 for eight people"||
Let's say the tab was $225 for eight—that's $28.00 per person. I've eaten dinner at Cracker Barrel many times and have never spent even as much as $20 per person, and generally it's been around $15 or so.
Maybe if you cut out the mimosas and breakfast bloodys your IHOP tab would be a bit smaller.
|2 days 9 hours ago||Doesn't schadenfreude normally accompany a loss?||
Seems to me we're being a bit premature here. OSU may not be the power they were last year, but until we actually beat them ourselves I'm going to hold off on the celebrations.
|3 days 45 min ago||If Brain is saying that Wolf Parade = Maryland football||
he's right. Yeesh.
|3 days 19 hours ago||remember how everyone completely lost their sh*t here||
??? That sure as hell wasn't my response. I just laughed at them. What they did had no bearing on who we were going to get.
|3 days 19 hours ago||we knew we were in deep sh*t after barely surviving Indiana.||
Hell, we were in deep shit after we barely survived UMass two weeks earlier. We had to hang on at home for a 42-37 win, giving up 450 yards to the Minutemen in the process. That game foretold doom.
Five years later, RR still doesn't have a defense.
|3 days 22 hours ago||that 13-12 loss in the '72 Rose Bowl||
Ugh. The first of what were to become many horribly disappointing bowl losses while I was in school at UM. Getting any offense at all was a chronic problem for Bo's teams in the Rose Bowl. Ten trips to Pasadena, and we scored more than 20 points on two occasions.
|4 days 1 hour ago||Any polling system that has Northwestern at #1—||
—who struggled at home against MAC power Ball State—is farcical in the extreme, but this is far from the first time Colley has produced completely ridiculous polling results.
NW is a good team—good enough to beat Michigan if we play poorly—but saying they're better than OSU, TA&M, MSU, TCU, Baylor, LSU, etc. is just plain fucking crazy.
|4 days 1 hour ago||So you think that Rudock has been throwing errant passes||
because he's been "shackled" by Jim Harbaugh?
This makes as much sense as the notion that Taysom Hill will be our QB next year.
|4 days 2 hours ago||I do think there is more than a remote chance that Taysom Hill||
There is a MUCH larger than remote chance you're completely delusional about Taysom Hill ever spending one minute on Michigan's sidelines in uniform.
|4 days 3 hours ago||I think the losses by UCLA, WVU, and ND take them off the board||
Which would leave FLA vs LSU, Bama vs TA&M, and UM-MSU.
If MSU had looked more impressive the last two weeks I'd be inclined to think our game would be a lock (assuming neither of us loses beforehand), but they hardly look like a true #2 team in the country. Fournette is a sensation so he would be a big draw, and the matchup of Alabama and A&M is probably the pairing of the best two teams. The main attraction for UM-MSU is the Harbaugh storyline against the backdrop of a bitter in-state rivalry.
|4 days 4 hours ago||You really believe that.||
And it's a smart thing to believe, too. Not every coach is the kind of guy who will ditch the school that made him who he is simply because some other institution offers him a pile of cash. We had a guy like that ourselves—Bo turned down a buttload of dough to go to Texas A&M, and he was considerably younger when he did that than Dantonio is now.
Dantonio is a sanctimonious, hypocritical prick, but he's not stupid. He knows that he can retire at MSU with the status of being a hero on campus. If he went to Texas, he's only as good as his first loss, and then the knives will come out.
|4 days 4 hours ago||They singlehandedly destroyed the Big 12||
Which is why the continuous murmur around here of "we should bring Texas into the BIG" is so dumb. It's a damn good public university, but the institutional culture in the athletic department is toxically selfish in the extreme. It's reflective of the state's overall cultural self-image—there's no more important state in the country, and Texas really should return to being an independent republic, so we won't ever have to compromise ever again with anybody because we're Texas and everybody should kiss our ass.
|4 days 17 hours ago||I hope RR does well at Arizona||
but I think the notion that he would have been a success here if only he'd been able to get Jeff Castell has been blown up. Even with Casteel, RR's defenses are still generally weak against good teams.
|5 days 2 hours ago||Derpity derp Jake||
|5 days 2 hours ago||This is what upsets are made of||
The team has heard all week how great they are. This will take them back to reality in a hurry.
Nice break on that offensive PI.
|5 days 2 hours ago||So far we look like ass||
The difference between playing at home and playing on the road
|5 days 2 hours ago||you go punt block on the next one?||
Even thinking about putting on a punt block in that situation was fucking stupid. Luckily we got the ball back on an INT, but c'mon, Baxter.
|5 days 3 hours ago||My 1st attendance at a UM game since I was an undergrad in 1976!||
That's one hell of a stretch! Let's hope the game today takes after Indiana in 1976 and not Purdue...
|5 days 9 hours ago||If he ain't so hammered that he's being held up by his bros||
he's a short little fuck like me.
Unfortunately, with a bit more in the bank account than I have.
|5 days 18 hours ago||Pitino got that equipment manager's wife pregnant.||
Wasn't Ricky slipping the sausage to some waitress at a local Lville restaurant? I think he was bending her over the salad bar.
|5 days 18 hours ago||Check out where her hand is hovering||
It's the Louisville difference
|5 days 18 hours ago||The fact that this is even a thing||
is proof that Tomsula is a dead man walking.
For those old enough to remember, it reminds me of the hoo-ha that surrounded the situation when Jimmy Carter had to fend off a crazed swimming rabbit while he was canoeing. When you're damaged goods, things that would otherwise be inconsequential are turned into examples of why you're a loser.
If Michigan had gone 10-2 with victories over MSU and Ohio State, people would have said, "ha ha, that's just RichRod, he's a goofball" when Josh Groban made his untimely audio appearance.
|5 days 22 hours ago||If you're bloody after drinking||
you should go to the emergency room right away.
|6 days 9 hours ago||My rule of thumb from many years of informal observations||
The more advance hysteria over an impending storm, the lesser the actual impact of said storm.
|6 days 23 hours ago||non-elite schools produce perfectly fine engineers, MDs||
Many UM people talk as though they would get up off the gurney in the O.R. if they found out the lead surgeon was an Ohio State grad.
|6 days 23 hours ago||26-13 Michigan||
UM dominates statistically, but turnovers keep the margin closer than it should be.
|1 week 17 hours ago||without setting up expectations too high.||
Careful...according to some people here, that means your a looser.
|1 week 21 hours ago||The insider talk I'm hearing||
is that Michigan and Maryland will play old-school Tecmo Bowl.
|1 week 1 day ago||Smith's made me yell incoherently at my TV.||
LOL, I did the same thing too, and the dog and cat got concerned and left the room.
|1 week 1 day ago||Smith in a runaway||
I've watched the replay 30 times and I still haven't seen an angle which shows how the hell he emerged from the pile on his feet.
|1 week 1 day ago||One hour of feels?||
That's something a 16-year old curses for its brevity, and an 80-year old praises for happening at all.
|1 week 1 day ago||And to think Edsall gave up a fairly good thing at Uconn||
I was sort of puzzled by that move too. There are plenty of examples of coaches without very impressive resumes who were hired by middling programs that took a chance on them, who then quickly leave for the "step up" and then fall flat on their faces.
In fact, we just had one here until this past January...
|1 week 2 days ago||C'mon man, do some research||
Don Nehlen: all-time winningest coach at WVU, got the Mountaineers to a NC game
Les Miles: Very successful at Okie St and LSU; won NC at LSU
Bill McCartney: great success at Colorado; won NC with Buffaloes
Lloyd Carr: Won NC at Michigan
Not to mention a large number of other assistants who had good amounts of success at Michigan and elsewhere.
I'll bet the number of head coaches with four former assistants to win 3 NCs and play for a fourth is pretty damn small.
|1 week 2 days ago||Interesting philosophy||
"Over shooting your expectations is what losers do"
"The only way a winner reaches there goal is by failing."
So, to translate:
1. exceeding expectations is losing
2. Failing is winning
By that metric, it's an outrage that RR and Hoke were fired.
|1 week 2 days ago||"a Michigan degree does travel and it is substantial.”||
That's a bit too close to "Academics is very important" for my comfort... if we do hear those words, that means Auburn's a lock.
|1 week 4 days ago||after watching them sputter against||
a team that hung 62 on one of the programs in the NC game last year and Michigan State's best opponent by far.
|1 week 4 days ago||This shutout has some interesting historic aspects||
Last time we shut out a ranked team: 2003, Notre Dame
Last time we shut out a ranked non-conference team other than ND: 1985, Maryland
Last time we shut out a ranked non-conference team from west of the Mississippi: 1947, USC
|1 week 4 days ago||Arizona gave up 525 yds to UT-San Antonio||
That should have been a big ol' neon sign that their D isn't very good.
|1 week 4 days ago||Michigan vs Northwestern? You can't be serious.||
Not with UM-MSU on the immediate horizon, and UM-OSU in November. Northwestern has no national juice anyhow—no one really care much about them outside the BIG.
|1 week 4 days ago||I know because I've been exposed too||
If that's the case, forget about vaticinate and vaccinate instead.
|1 week 5 days ago||e was so nervous he puked on the centers hand||
Someone get some ipecac to Wormley, stat.
|1 week 6 days ago||they are decidedly small overall||
That was the case with UNLV as well, and it's not like we ran roughshod over them.
|1 week 6 days ago||this is fucking nuts||
The players on ASU's squad are going to be spending half their life on planes, in airports, and getting to and from airports.
|1 week 6 days ago||There's some painful history to remedy||
SAN DIEGO (AP) - Brigham Young, which had had to defend its schedule, its conference and its No. 1 ranking for the last month, found itself embroiled in another controversy Saturday when Michigan Coach Bo Schembechler accused the Cougars of being "absolutely the worst holding team in the United States of America."
Schembechler made the remark after BYU Coach La Veil Edwards, whose offensive linemen had been accused of holding in Friday night's 24-17 victory in the Holiday Bowl, said, "We don't have a lock on holding. The two worst holding teams are Ohio State and Michigan. People think passing teams are the only ones that hold. But there's more holding on running plays than passing plays."
Schembechler, who spoke after Edwards at the news conference Saturday night, snorted that "his team (BYU) should be outlawed — absolutely outlawed. Their offensive linemen stand up, they detach two guards so there's no one on the line of scrimmage and they got called for it twice. "You're telling me that he (BYU quarterback Robbie Bosco) got out of some of those messes without their tackling us?" Schembechler said that on BYU's tying a 7-yard pass from Bosco to Glen Kozlowski with 10:51 remaining, a Michigan pass-rusher "was not ALMOST pulled down, he was tackled. You can hone in on our nose guard all game long, and you'll see everything from grabbing his face mask to a black eye from holding onto him."
|1 week 6 days ago||we can probably move on from being emotionally invested in this||
I stopped getting emotionally invested in recruiting a long, long time ago, especially when it comes to elite defensive linemen who claim that academics are very important to them.
|2 weeks 4 hours ago||Given that some of you have posted images or vids||
to one of the stupidest sci-fi films ever made, or a piece of crap sequel which contains a ridiculously over-the-top and eminently mockable "patriotic" song delivered by some no-talent hack who couldn't hold his own in a cheap karaoke bar, it looks to me like some of you are making fun of Darboh's new citizenship.
Why that would be is a mystery.
|2 weeks 6 hours ago||24-17||
|2 weeks 1 day ago||"downward facing dog" in front of a room full of people.||
My downward-facing dog always manages to poop right when some attractive woman walks by, which means I'm on turd management duty as she smirks at me.
|2 weeks 1 day ago||will be the biggest issue.||
To me the biggest issue is whether or not our DL can put meaningful pressure on Mangum. And by meaningful I mean pressuring him enough so that he can't get a pass off, has to eat the ball, or has to chuck it out of bounds. If all we do is flush him from the pocket without actually sacking him before he gets off the pass, that's not enough.
I wish Mone was healthy.
|2 weeks 1 day ago||Better sounding like a malt liquor than a chocolate syrup||
My fear is that Mangum will have a Robbie Bosco-like game. Check out this stat line from the last time we played BYU:
UM couldn't pass for shit, couldn't run the ball enough to make up for it, and couldn't hold Bosco in check when it counted.
|2 weeks 1 day ago||if we are respectful fans we shouldn't have any issues||
Any crowd of over 100K is going to have some obnoxious assholes in it, but I think it's very unlikely you'll encounter overt hostility of the beer-on-the-head variety. You won't get any grandmothers saying "fuck you" or little kids flipping you the bird like you'll get down in Columbus. That doesn't mean you won't get some good-natured ribbing, but its intensity will be largely a function of who your seat neighbors are and how vociferous you are.
|2 weeks 1 day ago||"Our QB situation is currently a dumpster fire."||
If you had written this all season in 2008, you'd be right. If you'd written this about the situation at Nebraska in 2012 after Denard went down, you'd be right.
In 2015, not by a long margin.
|2 weeks 1 day ago||The previous HC from his HS is on our staff||
A very common opinion around here when Partridge was hired was that it would virtually guarantee that Gary would come here, and more than a few thought it was the primary reason he was hired in the first place.
Sam Webb is normally a very optimistic guy, but he's been quite guarded in his comments about Gary over the last couple of months—listening between the lines, so to speak, leads me to conclude that Sam privately thinks he's likely to go elsewhere. This is similar to what he was saying about Dashawn Hand last year.
|2 weeks 2 days ago||Why don't we put the reporter's name before the question,||
It's so we don't know what dimwit asks incredibly lame questions like this:
"but how big is it that you can have different guys that you can throw in there if one guy is not playing well and one guy is playing well?"
It's a stupid fucking question in its very nature. Does this journo actually expect Harbaugh to say, "No, it's not a big thing at all, irrelevant, doesn't matter." No, he's asking a question to which he expects to get the response he's already mentally written in his write-up of the presser: "It's huge, amazing, wonderful that I have so many guys who can get in there at RB."
I love the fact that Harbaugh refused to confirm the basic premise and essentially told that numbskull to GTFU.
|2 weeks 3 days ago||I'm pretty sure it was at the corner of State and Ellsworth||
It was in a building that had formerly been another restaurant, and then after Bo's closed Gallagher's was there for a few years.
|2 weeks 3 days ago||All it takes is one injury||
and suddenly Green is getting lots of carries.
He won't break tackles like Smith or Isaac, but he's got a much quicker first step than Deveon and if he has a damn hole he can be a productive back.
Seriously, you upvoted yourself? Are you 12?
|2 weeks 3 days ago||Rudcock?||
That's a new one.
|2 weeks 3 days ago||The defense is good, borderline great,||
Aren't there a few more categories between good and "borderline great," say like very good, damn good, fucking good, and excellent?
|2 weeks 3 days ago||Grad transfer Taysom Hill would be...||
injured in his first game for Michigan.
|2 weeks 3 days ago||We're going 2-10||
After today's debacle, Jed York is fired by his parents and they work a trade, persuading Harbaugh to come back to SF by making him 50% owner of the franchise, general manager, director of player personnel, and head coach.
The other part of the trade? Jim Tomsula is now the J. Ira and Nicki Harris Head Football Coach at Michigan.
|2 weeks 4 days ago||24-18 Mormons||
BYU crowds the line of scrimmage to slow down our running game, and to force Rudock to beat them with his arm. He doesn't.
This is going to be a very interesting look into Harbaugh's coaching mind. Some are saying that we've kept things very vanilla on offense just to keep our capabilities hidden from future opponents, with the implication that he'll pull stuff out of the bag for BYU. Others are thinking he'll stay vanilla because he only really cares about the conference. Skeptics might say that we've run what we've run because that's the only stuff Harbaugh has any confidence in the team being able to do. Will he be as close-to-the-vest as Bo and Lloyd, or will he open things up a bit? And do we have a QB that is capable of executing the latter option?
|2 weeks 4 days ago||Had to tuck it into my pants||
Either your wife's purse is tiny or you're wearing some very commodious Sansabelts.
|2 weeks 4 days ago||I forgot about psu||
and Maryland and Rutgers, which were also before the OSU game. And screw Busch Lite, make it a Two Hearted or Gulo Gulo.
You're right that MSU's defense is not exactly dominant yet this year.
|2 weeks 4 days ago||You're the happy guy at a funeral who's still mad||
Not sure I know what the hell you're trying to say, but the only way I'm ever going to be happy at a funeral is if I'm inheriting a pile of cash. Sadly, that's never going to happen.
|2 weeks 4 days ago||MSU given up 3500 yds in last 5 games going back to '14||
Air Force: 428
Total last five games: 2059 yards given up
|2 weeks 4 days ago||Rudock is a practice warrior who can't get it done on Saturday||
There are also other players who don't impress much during practice but light it up on game day. The only way to know for sure whether any given player will make an impact is to play him during games.
|2 weeks 4 days ago||Rudock has thrown 5 interceptions in 3 games||
Brian Griese threw 6 in the entire 1997 season, and on top of that hit numerous deep passes, including a couple in the Rose Bowl. Anybody who says Rudock is the same kind of QB is nuts.
The argument that Morris has never shown anything so he doesn't deserve any playing time strikes me as pretty strange, given that he played behind an OL that couldn't block a middle school team and for a coaching staff that gave every appearance of not having a clue what it was doing.
Unless Rudock and the rest of the offense—especially the OL—improve dramatically in the next few weeks, the MSU game is going to be rough.
|2 weeks 5 days ago||If we win only by 17-10||
That's a loss
|2 weeks 5 days ago||Good god||
Some of you are pretty fragile... it's just a goddamn photo. It's like you think you've seen a Satanic symbol.
|2 weeks 5 days ago||A few were pushing the idea of Butch Jones coming here||
It was unlikely given that he'd just started at Tennessee, and Harbaugh made all that talk moot anyhow, thank God. Hiring Debord as his OC is almost as crazy as RR choosing Greg Robinson.
|2 weeks 5 days ago||Sam Webb, who is wrong quite often in basketball.||
Aside from the fact that Webb hails from Flint and talks to recruits and/or their parents and/or their coaches virtually every fucking day of the week, he had been saying for a long time that while Michigan was in very good position in the recruiting for Winston, it was never a lock for us and that MSU was very definitely a strong possibility for Winston.
The notion that Sam Webb—or any other analyst—is "wrong" because a recruit suddenly changes his mind—which happens constantly—is boneheaded.
Webb said two weeks before Dashawn Hand committed to Alabama that if the decision came down to football, that Hand was going to Tuscaloosa. People around here were confidently predicting Hand was coming to Michigan right up till signing day, and then when he chose the Tide they were shocked, and some even tried to say Webb was wrong when in fact he called it just the way it eventually went.
|2 weeks 5 days ago||He did say it was "unfortunate" that Michigan pulled his offer.||
If he thinks it was "unfortunate," the only person he can blame is the guy looking back at him in the mirror. He had plenty of time to commit, and he chose not to. That's on him, not John Beilein.
|2 weeks 6 days ago||you show up naked at school for a test you haven’t studied for||
I have actually had this dream.
|2 weeks 6 days ago||So out in 4 corners area,||
Hope you've manage to avoid the flooding in those parts. Heard several people died in Zion a couple days ago.
|3 weeks 6 min ago||Cumong|
|3 weeks 2 hours ago||Can we remove rutgers from the big ten already||
I'm on board, and see if we can entice Pitt to leave the ACC.
|3 weeks 6 hours ago||50-13||
|3 weeks 1 day ago||over optimistic thinking will somehow jinx the team||
Optimistic thinking on the part of the fans will neither jinx the team nor help it. It has no effect whatsoever on the performance of the team. Neither does pessimistic thinking.
The only exception I'll make is that I believe in certain circumstances fan enthusiasm at home games can make a difference. But I don't believe that's what you're talking about here.
|3 weeks 1 day ago||how about those 5-0 starts under Rich Rod?||
Yeah, all one of them.
|3 weeks 1 day ago||What a ridiculous comparison||
Ranking UW Madison #8 to Michigan's #10 in party schools is like ranking a Tesla #8 and a Toyota Yaris #10 in a poll of hot cars
|3 weeks 2 days ago||it is wise to not be a controlling weinerschnitzel||
But is it OK to be a spicy weiner?
|3 weeks 2 days ago||Wouldn't you just hate to lose a game by out-thinking yourself?||
Pete Carroll didn't seem to have any trouble "getting fancy" in that bowl game, did he? And if either one of those teams could have gotten away with doing exactly what they had done all season, it was USC.
I've watched Michigan go 3-12 against the PAC in the Rose Bowl since Jan 1, 1970. If any program should have figured out long ago that they were unlikely to win out in Pasadena by doing the same damn thing they've done all season, it's Michigan. There's shitloads of talent out on the west coast, and I believe that Michigan routinely underestimates that talent. And on top of that, we routinely have the worst fucking luck with injuries and referees out there.
|3 weeks 3 days ago||Michigan is on a long path to being both good and confusing.||
One of the very, very few shortcomings of Bo and Lloyd was that their natural tendency was to very rarely do anything fundamentally different with the purpose of confusing the opponent. With the possible exception of Carr's final bowl game against Florida, I have never once heard any of Michigan's bowl opponents say, whether we've won or lost, "boy, Michigan had a bunch of new stuff in this game that we'd never seen on tape and we just couldn't adjust. We were confused." To the contrary, they usually say stuff like this after the 2004 Rose Bowl:
"Tatupu said the Trojans ran five new blitzes on the Wolverines. Coach Pete Carroll refused to reveal what he saw that made him come so hard with the corners. Whatever he saw, corners Marcell Almond and Will Poole got the first two sacks, and on the opening drive. Poole sacked John Navarre again on the first play of the second quarter, running forever before he reached the quarterback.
And after the 2007 Rose Bowl, this:
"USC's center, Ryan Kalil, and its defensive end, Lawrence Jackson, both talked about the predictable nature of Michigan's strategy -- on both sides of the ball. Jackson called U-M's defense traditional and stale. Meanwhile, USC -- after mustering only three points in the first half Monday -- scrapped its plan and came out throwing.
Lloyd Carr stated, "What we discussed at the half we are still in the game at 3-3 was going earlier to our two-minute offense [shotgun formation, more open plays]," he said. "But we wanted to protect our defense, so we decided to stay with the plan."
Brian Cushing praised the Wolverines afterward because that is what players are taught to do and there is no percentage in not doing so. But he also admitted that he had been well-enough prepared to know what was coming with just about every Michigan trip to the line of scrimmage.
"Yup, pretty much so," he said. "I understand what they were trying to do," Cushing said. "It is the Big Ten mentality to try and overpower you."
Harbaugh understands that overpowering opponents who have good talent is made far more likely when you combine physical play with the strategic and tactical intent of confusing the opponent.
|3 weeks 3 days ago||Upvote for Sean Connery and the DB-5||
Always a good look.
|3 weeks 3 days ago||"DeVeon, describe your running style"||
That's right up there with the always-classic "How do you feel after winning?"
|3 weeks 3 days ago||Yes, reporters are terrible||
I don't even understand the question that knob asked. It makes no sense.
|3 weeks 4 days ago||"I don't think you need a cliché like that."||
I like this man.
|3 weeks 4 days ago||So that means the starting QBs of our next two opponents||
—BYU and UNLV—have gone down.
Football has always been a war of attrition, but it seems like serious injuries are far more plentiful these days.
|3 weeks 4 days ago||First player to go directly to NBA from high school||
and he averaged a double-double (pts and reb) for 20 years.
|3 weeks 4 days ago||How are they going to handle Peppers?||
How are they going to handle Peppers doing what on special teams?
He's returned 3 punts for a grand total of 14 yards, and 2 KOs for a total of 47 yards. That's not going to scare anybody.
Peppers might be a hell of an athlete and a badass at safety, but that doesn't automatically mean he's going to be more than average at returning kicks. So far, he hasn't shown he will be, but let's wait a few games to see.
It's like the hype mania about Norfleet all over again.
|3 weeks 4 days ago||So many people criticized Harbaugh for the freak out||
Anybody's who criticizing Harbaugh is a clueless numbskull who has never watched either college or pro football. Coaches have been going apeshit on the sidelines over referee calls since the beginning of the game, and they always will. Those who think this is something unusually awful should shift their attention to fucking senior citizen bingo.
|3 weeks 4 days ago||Well yes, he has||
|3 weeks 4 days ago||Or a falcon just shit on his head.||
That was Randy Edsall with the falcon shit on his noggin.
|3 weeks 4 days ago||All Michigan fans know what UVA has gone through||
1980 still sticks in my craw.
|3 weeks 4 days ago||Maize & Blue Wahoo I feel your pain||
and how about those Bowling Green Falcons putting up 692 yards in a 48-27 beatdown on the road in Maryland.
|3 weeks 4 days ago||I'm watching ND. They about to lose. Haha.||
You're Leon Lett spiking the ball before you get to the goal line.
|3 weeks 5 days ago||Went to bed at 10:30||
woke up stark awake at midnight and couldn't get back to sleep so I went down to the office and got some work done. That's one of the downsides of a home office—you're never away from work.
|3 weeks 5 days ago||Those "defenses"||
aren't good at football.
|3 weeks 5 days ago||I wonder if there's a single American state||
or country in the world without at least one Michigan fan or graduate. Oman? Brunei? Bangladesh? British Guyana?
|3 weeks 5 days ago||I came to A2 in 1971||
I don't remember hearing it until about 10 years ago.
|3 weeks 5 days ago||lack of proofing is stupid||
but I'm more bothered by "Big Blue."
|3 weeks 6 days ago||If Johnson is able to play an entire season||
I'll be ecstatic and very surprised. We sure as hell need what he can bring to the field.
|3 weeks 6 days ago||If John Beilein is really head of the Ethics Committee||
He's rescind these shorts as a flagrant abuse of human rights and common sense.
I want to see the fucking photo of the nimrods who approved these at Adidas and Michigan.
|3 weeks 6 days ago||I think you mean Jeb!||
I saw what you did there, but nobody else did. Which is probably a good thing...
|3 weeks 6 days ago||It's got to be something more than simply hanging out||
with some rapper numbskulls who're holding guns and booze. If that's all he's done, you sit him down and read him the riot act, and maybe suspend him for a game—you don't boot him off the team just for that with no intermediate suspension.
|3 weeks 6 days ago||This is truly tragic in terms of lost opportunity for LTT||
I'm familiar with LTT from the academic side of things and he didn't give the slightest hint that he was anything but completely serious about being a student and a scholarship athlete. I can't imagine him doing something that would warrant immediate dismissal like this. I hope that the staff isn't overreacting in some way.
|4 weeks 13 min ago||a team being honored at a Michigan game||
What do you mean by "team?" A Michigan team, like the 1996 men's swimming team? If that's the case, holy hell.
My view is that David Brandon is a normal human being—complicated, conflicted, inconsistent, rigid, biased, welcoming, greedy, generous, friendly, prickish, asshole, nice guy—and all of these characteristics show themselves in different situations depending on who's involved. He's not a monster or maniac who was bent on destroying the Michigan athletic department. He was just extremely ill-suited for the job here, and Mary Sue Coleman deserves much of the blame for essentially forcing him on the University against the explicit recommendations of the search committee she formed.
In other words, don't ascribe to malevolence that which can be easily explained by incompetence. Looking at the totality of what the athletic director at Michigan is responsible for, Brandon was not competent.
Based on what I've previously read about Patterson, I think he's even worse than Brandon, but that's Texas for you: everything's bigger in the Lone Star state, including the assholes.
|4 weeks 2 hours ago||Drake's lucky||
that it was his socks at issue and not his jock strap.
|4 weeks 16 hours ago||that's the last time I did any recruit hyping.||
It just shows the power of carefully edited moving images on the human brain and psyche.
|4 weeks 17 hours ago||It's not as though Winston didn't have plenty of time||
and opportunity to either commit, or give a clear and unequivocal private signal to the coaches that he'd commit after an official.
I'd say that it wasn't so much that Michigan "yanked" the offer as much as somebody else pulled the trigger and accepted the available spot. Are Beilein and staff supposed to sit there twiddling their thumbs after recruiting this kid for several years and a bunch of unofficial visits? Especially when there have been lots of people saying all along that MSU was a strong contender for Winston anyhow?
|4 weeks 18 hours ago||This thread is so MGoBlog||
I'm a liberal pinko socialist commie and I love flyovers by military aircraft. I see nothing wrong about them whatsoever. In fact, I love them so much I'm going to subject you to yet another tiresome recounting of the UM-OSU game in 1971.
Michigan enters the game 10-0 and ranked #3. There was legit hope that if Nebraska stumbled, Michigan had a clear path to a national title in Bo's third year. While OSU was having a down year for them, it didn't matter in the least to us. The intensity among the fans was at a fever pitch entering Michigan Stadium. Ufer was going apeshit before the game even started.
At halftime the score was 3-0, and given that the war in Vietnam was still in progress, a portion of the halftime festivities down on the field was devoted to honoring the dead and wounded, including those who were designated MIAs, or missing in action.
I have no memory of where my ticketed seats were—things were still pretty loose those days—but I was standing on the very top row of seats in the south end zone just north of that puny scoreboard, watching the band down on the field perform a short piece recognizing the MIAs.
Without any warning from the announcer or any audible sign of what was coming, a small group of F-5 Phantoms flying a missing man formation came from the south, behind me. They were low and directly over the stadium, and it seemed like they weren't more than 20 feet above my head. Luckily, I have a strong sphincter.
If any of you have been at an airshow and have experienced what it's like to have a jet come right over you from behind, you know that you don't hear the goddamn thing until it's over your head. It's pant-crapping, drink-spilling territory if you're not mentally prepared.
"Touchdown Billy Taylor!" and Woody tearing up the sideline markers were just the perfect topper.
So AAK15, thanks for the info, and to Ugly and Vito for their service.
|4 weeks 19 hours ago||Asian teenage women too?||
Nothing is more hilarious—or frustrating, if you're pressed for time—than being behind an elderly woman of whatever ethnic or racial background in a Prius in an Ann Arbor parking structure. You can literally see the sun move in the sky while they make up their minds what they want to do.
|4 weeks 19 hours ago||the wingtips of two Ilyushin aircraft brushed in mid-air,||
Well c'mon, those Ilyushin's were Soviet commie aircraft and the pilots were probably wanked from drinking the antifreeze they drained from the hydraulic systems. Those Russians y'know.
|4 weeks 19 hours ago||Anyone else have a feeling he may end up a Linebacker.||
I predict that Viramontes will play at least one snap at QB in a regular season game for Michigan.
I also predicted that Sam McGuffie would be a legit Heisman contender by his junior season.
|4 weeks 19 hours ago||32-16||
Gulo Gulo 32 Castor canadensis 16
|4 weeks 23 hours ago||Non-paywall stuff over at Rivals|
|4 weeks 1 day ago||Meh is right, depending||
If we play them every three or four years, great—it would give us the opportunity to play the out-of-region games everybody wants.
If it's every damn year, I say no.
|4 weeks 1 day ago||Just updated the Xavier Simpson CrystalBall.||
That tears it... if Crystal's Infallible Balls are trending Michigan, he's going elsewhere.
|4 weeks 1 day ago||For the love of god win a fucking game please||
Amen. Going back to last season we've lost three straight, and we're 3-7 in our last ten games.
This will change next Saturday.
|4 weeks 1 day ago||If we offered him||
what's the significance of the official visit date then?
|4 weeks 1 day ago||Help me out here||
Have we not actually offered him yet? Or have we offered him and he's simply not really interested?
|4 weeks 1 day ago||This must be a joke||
She was researching something that directly impacts the health and lives of millions, but the prize went to somebody studying courtship rituals in birds?
No wonder the Russkies beat us into space.
|4 weeks 1 day ago||Same season rematches suck||
The Holiday Bowl is OK, but not if we end up playing Utah again. That's got no juice at all. Much rather play Georgia or LSU.
|4 weeks 1 day ago||Sorry you feel the way that you feel,||
Don't feel sorry for me; I sure as hell don't.
But just out of curiosity: do you deny that there were some really bad games during Bo's tenure? And if you accept that there were, why do you think there will be none under Harbaugh?
|4 weeks 1 day ago||"if he coaches Michigan for 20 years..."||
you are absolutely guaranteed to see several games where we play worse.
Check out Bo's overall record. There were some real turkeys along the way, and they in no way diminish his accomplishments. That's the reality as a coach of 18-23 year olds.
You're erecting ridiculously unrealistic criteria that can only lead to disappointment for you.
|4 weeks 1 day ago||"There are people over here who have it."||
Regardless of how nice and proper it might be to compensate somebody for their efforts, where are those athletic departments that normally operate in the red—which is the vast majority of them—going to get the large pile of cash that will be required to pay players?
The logical source of the money is the NFL (or the NBA if we're talking about basketball) since modern college football is in fact a de facto minor league for the NFL that they don't pay a fucking nickel for. Needless to say, both the NFL and the NBA would laugh at the suggestion. The NHL and MLB must envy the thieves running pro football.
|4 weeks 2 days ago||This is just such an idiotic statement.||
At what positions does our talent equal OSU's?
|4 weeks 2 days ago||Thankfully it sounds like there weren't serious injuries||
I'd be very surprised if alcohol wasn't involved, though.
IIRC, Gary made some wild threats to the LEOs who arrested him back in '95, and I believe it was the booze talking. Alcohol makes some people nuts when they drink too much, and I'd bet that there's a genetic predisposition that way.
Permanent sobriety is the only course for those in that situation.
|4 weeks 3 days ago||It must have been stinky||
check the reaction on her face... she didn't like what she smelled.
|4 weeks 4 days ago||Cerk isn't the first 21-year old who's a bit self-righteous||
about whatever he's doing.
Considering what plenty of other 19- to 21-year old college kids do in their spare time—drunken cornhole, marathon Halo sessions, vomiting copiously after 14 too many Jagerbombs, endlessly discussing what strain of weed is the best, getting so hammered that they fall through skylights to their death—building your own dwelling unit from scratch over a two-year span isn't something that would seem to merit derision.
But since this is America, Cerk is a nerd to be laughed at.
|4 weeks 4 days ago||I want PSU to be kicked out of the Big Ten.||
Replace PSU with Pitt, and get rid of Rutgers in favor of Missouri. Both Pitt and Mizzou are members of the AAU so you're not weakening the academic end of things.
|4 weeks 4 days ago||The KSU non-apology is disingenuous in the extreme||
Their game was against South Dakota—why would a K-State band be showing a Jayhawk anyhow? And why would the formation show a Jayhawk—their most hated rival—biting the good guys in the Enterprise? Wouldn't the formation logically show the Enterprise oriented the correct way blasting the Jayhawk with its phasers?
|4 weeks 5 days ago||Not going to start rationalizing defeat as if it's normal.||
I don't know if your comment was in response to my OP, but describing history is not tantamount to "rationalizing defeat."
In fact, the whole point of the post was to emphasize how unusual Utah's victories are. They're the exact opposite of "normal."
|4 weeks 5 days ago||If an interest in UM football history is geeky||
guilty as charged.
|4 weeks 5 days ago||Hope I can return to Utah canyon country soon||
Bryce, Zion, Canyonlands, and Arches are all fantastic.
|4 weeks 5 days ago||Opening on the road has been rare enough over the years||
but opening on the road with a non-conference game against anybody other than ND has been rarer still:
'54 at Washington; '57 at USC; '65 at North Carolina; '91 at BC; '12 against Alabama in Dallas; '15 at Utah
|4 weeks 5 days ago||"The Maize Conspiracy"||
is the latest Dan Brown novel, and is the sequel to Inferno. Set in Ann Arbor, Columbus, and Rome, The Maize Conspiracy follows Robert Langdon's quest to find the correct CMYK formula for the maize thread used in the robe worn by the apostle James at the Last Supper. Langdon discovers that this CMYK formula is also a critical part of a security code that disarms a nuclear device that was placed somewhere in Michigan Stadium by an agent of the radical Italian anarchist group, Pope Urban's Army.
|4 weeks 6 days ago||All the hysteria at MGoBlog about Canteen||
was based entirely on a padless footwork drill. It was characteristic of the completely over-the-top giddiness and hype that's been the norm here since Carr retired.
|4 weeks 6 days ago||Not sure I'd call it a leap||
Notable improvement in pass production, yes, but there were few real holes for the RBs. There's every reason to be confident that the run blocking will improve, but I didn't see much improvement in that specific area last night.
Would better RBs help? Absolutely. Smith runs hard and always keeps his legs moving after contact, but he's pretty slow-footed and doesn't exhibit much vision. I was sort of surprised that Isaac didn't get more carries.
|4 weeks 6 days ago||8-4||
|4 weeks 6 days ago||8-4||
|4 weeks 6 days ago||I will never understand why Pitt wasn't looked at||
I'd trade Rutgers and Penn State for Pitt and Missouri in a heartbeat.
|4 weeks 6 days ago||It's very unlikely that the BIG would abandon||
its long-time policy of having all conference schools be members of the Association of American Universities. Both Rutgers and Maryland are members; Louisville is not.
Yes, Nebraska is no longer a member, but they were booted after their admission to the conference. Their president has stated that if NEB had not been an AAU member when the conference was considering expansion, it would not have been asked to join the conference.
|5 weeks 3 hours ago||Utah 23 UM 20||
Michigan misses two FGs along the way.
Humane Society of Huron Valley
|5 weeks 3 hours ago||The whole "scandal" was bullshit to begin with||
There were no established metrics or procedures for testing balls, balls for both Indy and NE were underinflated, and all the offending balls were taken out by the end of the first half anyhow.
When you build your castle on sand, it tends to collapse.
LSA's point is the best one: out of all the issues that the NFL faces, it was idiotic for Goodell to draw his stupid line in the sand over this one. It's like obsessing about dirty dishes in the sink when your roof is on fire.
|5 weeks 1 day ago||Believing that Drake Johnson will be one of the major backs||
strikes me as being enormously optimistic. Given his record, he's more likely to get injured again than he is to see significant playing time over the course of the season. And that's damn unfortunate for everybody, especially Drake.
|5 weeks 1 day ago||Did you see that shit Cat Fancy said about us?||
No, but the trash-talking in Pet Your Pussy Gazette is completely over the top.
|5 weeks 1 day ago||Are they any bigger than Oregon, USC, UCLA? No.”||
Considering where Michigan has been during the last seven years, Whittingham is right. The vast majority of college football fans don't give a shit about what happened prior to 1960, and a sizeable percentage really only care about what's happened in the last decade.
|5 weeks 1 day ago||'Muricans loooove their bug businesses.||
Actually, the vast majority of Americans find insects unpleasant/disgusting/scary/weird/etc.
Unless you're referring to exterminators, who they love.
|5 weeks 1 day ago||a 14er like Mount Evans, Pikes Peak, or Mount Elbert||
I've done Evans and Elbert, but haven't had the chance to do Pikes Peak yet.
My dad spent many summers in Georgetown and environs (8,530 ft and up) and never had any problems, but when he got into his 70s he encountered severe sleep apnea at that elevation and had to start staying in Idaho Springs (7526 ft), so altitude problems can develop at different stages in life.
To your point about the game in SLC, I agree that 3800 ft in gain shouldn't be significant. It might be more of a psychological issue than physical.
|5 weeks 1 day ago||I went to the Football Scoop archives so you don't have to||
Scott Roussel's genius reportage as of December 13, 2014:
"The Brady Hoke era officially came to a close on Tuesday December 2nd. As we come to the close of the 2nd week of the search for his successor, and as recruiting goes “dead”, I reached out to some sources in Michigan and within the profession to attempt to update coaches as to where this search stands and is headed. Based on those discussions, this is where Michigan appears headed…
Most of the senior leadership within Michigan athletics and on their board of regents now understand that Jim Harbaugh is unlikely to come to Michigan and I am told Hackett has been told it will be acceptable to hire a “college coach” before the end of the NFL season if he finds the one he is willing to stand behind.
Per sources, Hackett and his staff have discussed both Jim Mora and Dan Mullen with the Regents. Sources in Michigan that I have spoken with believe that if either Mora or Mullen were willing to come, then Hackett would support those hires.
Last year Jim Mora was offered the head coaching position at Texas and turned it down despite the fact that the offer was significantly more than $4 million per year. When that happened, I spoke with two sources very close to the situation and wrote about that. Mora turned down that opportunity because this simply wasn’t the right time for he and his family to leave California. Jim has four children, one who had just begun college out there, two in high school and one in junior high (at the time). They have just built a house, etc…the timing wasn’t right then to leave for another college job, and quite honestly, I don’t see that changing for this opportunity at Michigan. With that said, it would seem to be a substantial waste of resources for Michigan to pursue someone who they have no shot at, so clearly Michigan feels he is willing to consider the opportunity. Sources in Michigan told me, UM officials believe that Mora is frustrated with not being able to get UCLA to the top and think he might be willing to make a move to Michigan. The L.A. Times reports that Mora is making $3.25 million this season.
I spoke with sources in the past few days who are close and very familiar with Dan Mullen. Both sources said to me that with Dan, it’s not about being the highest paid coach in his state / conference/ whatever (which is more important to some coaches than many people understand), what drives Dan is his desire to win a national championship. Both sources explained to me how they felt Michigan would provide a potentially easier route to the college football playoffs; and hence the opportunity to win a national championship. Said one, “This might have been Dan’s most talented team ever, and in a year when LSU, A&M and Arkansas were down, he still didn’t even win his division.” Mississippi State athletic director Scott Stricklin stated quite a while back that they were hopeful to be able to reach an extension with Mullen; but that extension hasn’t been signed yet… When I asked sources familiar with Michigan’s search if they would characterize Mullen as a lead candidate, the response was “I don’t know that Hackett felt that way last week; but it certainly seems like he considers him a very viable candidate now.” Mullen’s current salary is approximately $3 million under his current deal; it is unknown what Mississippi State’s new offer to Mullen is at this time in the proposed extension. Note that Hugh Freeze just signed an extension bringing his base salary up to $4.3 million for the upcoming season.
Sources in Michigan reminded me several times that these aren’t the only candidates that Michigan plans in person visits with this week (I was told earlier in the week they planned to meet with 10+ candidates); but they say Hackett seemed most excited / animated with speaking about Mora and Mullen.
Based on everything I’ve heard, I don’t think you can completely eliminate the possibility that Michigan will wait on an NFL coach; but it appears based on what they have heard back from coaches and their search advisors that Michigan is allotting their time in the coming week on successful college head coaches.
One name that I truly haven’t heard from sources in Michigan; but I continue to hear from coaches is Joe Moglia at Coastal Carolina. A number of coaches I have spoken with feel Moglia might just be the perfect coach to invest in Michigan football. What he has done in his short time at Coastal has been awfully impressive. Will be interesting to see if the search firm suggests the same to Hackett.
As always, we’ll keep you posted as things become more clear on The Scoop."
That's right—Scott Roussel actually suggests that a 66-year old coach who has exactly three years of experience as a head coach at the collegiate level—at Coastal Carolina—would be a logical choice for Michigan.
To say that Roussel was pulling all of this directly out of his ass is putting too nice a spin on it.
|5 weeks 2 days ago||Does your avatar say Panguitch Lake?||
Spent some time in Panguitch city a few years ago while on vacation in UT. Interesting place.
|5 weeks 2 days ago||Loved this play from that game||
Shifting formations three times for a net gain of zero yards is "the attitude Michigan needs on the sidelines?"
I think you're confusing theatrics with production.
|5 weeks 2 days ago||If the birds are popping on them and then they're brined too||
I'm not sure they're worth it after all that.
|5 weeks 2 days ago||No Drake Johnson. Still recovering from injury.||
This can't be a surprise to anybody.
|5 weeks 3 days ago||Just out of curiosity||
Where are you all making the trek from? Anybody going out there from A2?
|5 weeks 4 days ago||Is there a way to find out his real name?||
If there is, I'm all for telling the world who he is. At the minimum, MGoBlog should post his email address here. Anonymity may not create assholism, but it certainly encourages it.
|5 weeks 5 days ago||"come from ahead defeats" during Carr era -- funny||
Thanks, but not sure how funny those defeats were, and I didn't coin the phrase anyhow—it's been around for years.
|5 weeks 5 days ago||It was a watershed game in UM history||
I came to school in '71, and one of the very few downsides of the Schembechler era was a consistent inability to come from behind late in the game if we were down more than a TD.
At the time, this was the largest deficit ever overcome in Michigan history, and while there were some disappointing come-from-ahead defeats in the Carr era, there were also more than a few dramatic come-from-behind wins, too. This was one of the best.
|5 weeks 6 days ago||we wore these pants in bowl games in both '74 and '75.||
There was no bowl game for us either in 1974 or after the 1974 season. The only bowl game we wore white was the Jan.1, 1976 Orange Bowl against Oklahoma.
|5 weeks 6 days ago||this man is smiling again||
I said two years ago that Hoke should bring back Hanlon as an active consultant.
That alone probably wouldn't have saved Hoke's job—the problems went far beyond just the OL—but I believe it would have resulted in several more victories. If nothing else, our OL wouldn't have been the largely ineffectual unit it became under the previous staff.
|5 weeks 6 days ago||I'd rather have the maize pants||
but the all-whites are infinitely superior to bumblebee-stripey-can't-read-the-fucking-numbers-clowniforms that Brandon imposed.
|5 weeks 6 days ago||What does "rolling guys 10 yards off the ball" mean?||
I'd interpret it to mean either of these things:
• the OL is successfully getting to the second level beyond the LOS and nailing LBs and DBs.
• the OL is getting so physically dominant that they're pushing the DL ten yards back from the LOS.
Or, best of all, both.
|6 weeks 17 hours ago||As long as Pinkel, Malzahn, and Miles keep coaching||
the Tigers will be OK.
|6 weeks 17 hours ago||C'mon, the obvious actor to portray Brain Cook is||
and David Brandon is
|6 weeks 17 hours ago||Jim Harbaugh - Daniel Day Lewis||
There will be blood, and he's gonna drink your fucking milkshake too.
|6 weeks 20 hours ago||You can't do just one||
This guy was eating dinner by himself in a restaurant and he sees an attractive woman over by the bar.
All of a sudden, she violently sneezes and her glass eye pops out and goes flying across the room.
He reaches up and deftly snags it out of midair, and then goes over and returns it to her.
She apologizes, and he says "You have nothing to apologize for. Would you like to join me for dinner?"
She agrees, and they hit it off very nicely. After a while, they go back to her place, and one thing leads to another.
The next morning, she's cooking him breakfast, and he says to her, Do you treat all the guys you meet this way?
She says, "No, you just happened to catch my eye."
A retired man goes into the Job Center in Downtown Denver, and sees a card advertising for a Gynecologist's Assistant. Interested, he goes to learn more; "Can you give me some more details?" he asks the clerk.
The clerk pulls up the file and says, "The job entails getting the ladies ready for the gynecologist. You have to help the women out of their underwear, lay them down and carefully wash their private regions, then apply shaving foam and gently shave off the hair, then rub in soothing oils so that they're ready
"There's an annual salary of $65,000, but you're going to have to go to Billings, Montana. That's about 550 miles from here."
"Good grief, is that where the job is?"
I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me ... It was her beautiful younger sister.
My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a nice view. It had to be deliberate. Because she never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day her 'little' sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister.
Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.
She said, 'I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me.'
I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.
Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping!
With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, 'We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.'
And the moral of this story is:
Always keep your condoms in your car
A couple was on their honeymoon, lying in bed, about ready to consummate their marriage, when the new bride says to the husband, "I have a confession to make, I'm not a virgin."
The husband replies, "That's no big thing in this day and age."
The wife continues, "Yeah, I've been with one guy."
"Oh yeah? Who was the guy?"
"Tiger Woods, the golfer?"
"Well, he's rich, famous and handsome. I can see why you went to bed with him."
The husband and wife then make passionate love.
When they are done, the husband gets up and walks to the telephone.
"What are you doing?" asks the wife.
The husband says, "I'm hungry, I was going to call room service and get something to eat."
"Tiger wouldn't do that."
"Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?"
"He'd come back to bed and do it a second time."
The husband puts down the phone and goes back to bed to make love a second time.
When they finish, he gets up and goes over to the phone. "Now what are you doing?" she asks.
The husband says, "I'm still hungry so I was going to get room service to get something to eat."
"Tiger wouldn't do that."
"Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?"
"He'd come back to bed and do it again."
The guy slams down the phone, goes back to bed, and makes love one more time.
When they finish he's tired and beat. He drags himself over to the phone and starts to dial.
The wife asks, "Are you calling room service?"
"No! I'm calling Tiger Woods...to find out what the par is for this damn hole."
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him.
She says hello.
He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from.
So he says, 'Do you know me?'
To which she replies, 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.'
Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, 'Are you the stripper from the Bachelor party that I had sex with on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery???'
She looks into his eyes and says calmly, 'No, I'm your son's teacher.'
In a trial in a small Southern town, the pompous prosecuting attorney called his first witness, an elderly grandmotherly woman, to the stand.
Brimming with confidence, he approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
Embarrassed and stunned, and not knowing what else to do, the prosecutor pointed across the room and asked, "Well, Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
She replied, "Why yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."
Dead silence filled the room, broken only by the presiding judge asking both counselors to approach the bench.
In a very quiet voice the judge said, "If either one of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair."
|6 weeks 21 hours ago||I'm surprised Afternoon Delight could accommodate||
85+ players. Place ain't that big, and their booths aren't either.
|6 weeks 1 day ago||can't imagine a worse task than what Ablauf has right now. . .||
Seriously? Imagine working under David Brandon while dealing with the fallout from a cratering program and a failing coach.
Ablauf wakes up each morning, thinks "I work with Jim Hackett and Jim Harbaugh now" and has a big fucking smile.
|6 weeks 3 days ago||Either those 17 people are Spartan and Buckeye fans||
or they should have quit drinking and gone to bed.
|6 weeks 3 days ago||then try to prove what an asshole he is to everyone||
I think the only appropriate measure would be to let everybody know who this fool really is.
|6 weeks 3 days ago||"NFL doesn't need fans to be successful"||
That's one of the most insanely stupid things I've ever heard. If Carter thinks that advertisers are going to pony up at those rates for games with no fans in the stands, he's a fucking idiot. And without those advertisers, the whole financial structure of the NFL falls apart. Good luck finding the money to pay those ridiculous contracts.
If Carter's attitude about fans and personal accountability is widespread among the players, then the NFL is doomed in the long run.
|6 weeks 4 days ago||If I ever watched ESPN aside from college football coverage||
this would bother me, but I can't remember the last time I had that channel on anyhow. Big time sports today is basically a freak show anyhow, so covering something as ridiculously bogus as WWE is just a tacit admission of that fact.
|6 weeks 4 days ago||but we never did anything on offense||
We've played in 15 Rose Bowls against the PAC since Bo arrived.
We've scored more than 21 points three times.
If that's all you can muster on the road against top-flight competition, getting victories is going to be tough.
|6 weeks 4 days ago||playing road games against teams with equal or better talent||
This is a critical point that Michigan fans never want to admit—that PAC10 teams are typically loaded with great talent, especially USC. Every year going into the Rose Bowl i heard the same bluster from people in Ann Arbor who were deluding themselves with the same notion—that the PAC10 was a sissified finesse conference that would wilt under Michigan's relentless physicality.
Unfortunately, that delusion was still in existence under Lloyd Carr. Before the 2004 Rose Bowl, Jim Herrman said, "We have to get numbers to the ball,...Those are 'party' plays. There goes the ball. There's a party out there. Go to it. Don't be late. The receivers don't like to catch the ball and get hit."
USC's receivers were so intimidated that the Trojans were limited to 24/35 for 342 yards and four receiving TDs in a 28-14 victory that wasn't as close as the score implies.
You'd think that a 4-11 record in the Rose Bowl against the PAC since 1970 would persuade Michigan fans that the talent out there is substantial, but I guarantee that when Harbaugh gets us back in Pasadena, we'll hear the same damn thing from the fans—the PAC12 is a finesse conference and we just have to hit 'em in the mouth and they'll cry. Perhaps with Harbaugh in charge we can actually make that happen.
|6 weeks 4 days ago||So are what-are-you-drinking threads on or off?||
We alcoholics need to know.
|6 weeks 4 days ago||You have the fever|
|6 weeks 5 days ago||University of Missouri football||
due to family history and background.
|6 weeks 5 days ago||Not sure how JUB knew all of this while rest of the media didn't||
He didn't know "all of this" before he started writing.
He interviewed a large number of people who were directly involved, and came out of it with hundreds of pages of single-spaced notes which formed the basis of his book. It's called basic editorial research, and is something that is virtually unknown to the vast majority of our incredibly lazy news/sports journalists.
|7 weeks 15 hours ago||I'm old enough that this is all deja vu to me||
From Sports Illustrated, September 14, 1981
"O.K., from a distance Bo comes on like a yahoo. And that's Bo's public image. He has had horrible problems with the press, which has this nasty habit of wanting to talk to him when he loses, his mother's advice notwithstanding. But even if the media's timing were better, it probably wouldn't make much difference, because Bo hates the press. Not just a little. A lot. The Voice of Michigan Football, Bob Ufer, says he has tried to get Schembechler to be nicer to the media. "But he told me," says Ufer, " 'Bob, if I win, I don't need the press, and if I lose, they can't help me.' "
Says Ufer, "Bo has two categories of things in his life: what matters and what doesn't matter. What matters is football. What doesn't matter is everything else. Bo is the kind of guy who is so dedicated that he doesn't realize how he's coming off." So while some coaches like to go out and drink with sportswriters, Bo would prefer to break out in warts.
Until a couple of years ago, he would routinely storm out of press conferences, kick reporters out of the sessions ("Don't be offended," says one of Bo's friends. "He'd kick Millie out, too"), make himself unavailable and order his players not to talk. Talking very softly once at a press conference, he was asked to speak up. "I'm speaking as loudly as I can," said Bo softly and arrogantly. And in a memorable set-to on Oct. 1, 1979, Schembechler gave an absolutely unnecessary push to a publicity-seeking college newspaper reporter.
Yet too much is read into all this. As Don Canham, athletic director at Michigan, says, "Bo is oblivious to life."
If Canham were still alive today, he might say "Bo doesn’t get sick. He doesn’t observe major holidays. He's a jackhammer.”
I don't know why anybody would care that JH doesn't want to speak to BTN—do they actually believe he's going to say anything that isn't pure coachspeak/pablum/fluff anyhow? Harbaugh could read from the phone book and it would be just as informative.
|7 weeks 1 day ago||This thread has to be the record||
for highest average of upvotes per comment.
And justifiably so, too.
|7 weeks 1 day ago||With Harbaugh there are basically no meal choices|
|7 weeks 1 day ago||This list is worthless since Grosse Pointe isn't in the top 3.||
It's an outrage that my hometown of Grosse Pointe isn't on the list. They were world-class snobs when I was there, and I can't believe they've fallen that far. Petoskey my ass.
|7 weeks 2 days ago||People are misunderstanding the invitation||
The students aren't going to be let in to just watch; they're going to have to suit up and beat the crap out of each other for four hours, then finish it off with a mile's worth of gassers.
|7 weeks 3 days ago||Brian needs to create an alternative blog||
MGoFucktheWorldOutsideAnnArbor.com will be for those whose gaze is entirely restricted to Michigan sports and humblebragging drinking threads. If you don't want to be distracted with anything pertaining to the larger world of college football, that would be the place for you.
|7 weeks 4 days ago||there were rumors they were going to do it during RR||
There was already a considerable amount of angst over the yellow "piping" on the unis while RR was here, and If he had gone to the white pants, MGoBlog would have melted down in an epic pant-crapping, "RR doesn't respect Michigan traditions" ragefest.
I don't hate them, but I strongly prefer the maize pants. My main issue with them is that 1974 was a horrifically disappointing season at the end, and the white pants have always been tied in my mind to seeing Lantry's successful field goal being waved off by those criminally incompetent and gutless refs down in Columbus. Third season in a row with 10 wins and no bowl game.
|7 weeks 4 days ago||For some people, being a starter at a smaller school||
is more important than getting a degree from one of the best public universities in the world, and playing for one of the best coaches in the country in the bargain.
I don't really understand that mindset myself, but then I've never been a scholarship athlete. I hope his decision works out well for him.
|7 weeks 5 days ago||whoever scores the winning touchdowns||
against MSU, OSU, and our bowl opponent.
|7 weeks 6 days ago||glad you are not in control because recruits are eating this up||
Who? Where? Jordan's last year with the Bulls was 1998, which was right around the time the vast majority of today's recruits were born. He's just an old man to 16- and 17-year olds.
|7 weeks 6 days ago||If he comes back this year it will be a surprise||
I can't believe he won't be on the shelf till 2016.
It was bad enough to lose Pipkins, and this just doubles the blow.
|8 weeks 1 hour ago||"but they aren't terrible."||
Not that any of this really matters to Michigan fans, but I'd bet that at least 90% of the ND fanbase would disagree vehemently with you.
|8 weeks 1 hour ago||Don't blame UA||
blame the numbskulls at ND who said "Ooooo, that looks great!"
|8 weeks 5 hours ago||NYT article gives some background||
I've never seen an explosion this large and this violent in a non-military situation. The amount of hazardous chemicals that were being stored must have been gigantic; this was far more than just a shipping container or two.
|8 weeks 1 day ago||putting him in space to make things difficult for opposing Ds||
I do think that RR would have made much better use of his abilities.
|8 weeks 1 day ago||We don't say these things Don||
I don't have anything against Norfleet; he's the career leader in Michigan history for KO yardage, and his average is the same as Derrick Alexander's.
My comment was directed at the countless opining here during the last three years alluding to a dynamic play-making ability that actually never seemed to surface during the games.
|8 weeks 1 day ago||"I am sad."||
Never in the field of human football was so much lauded by so many to such little real effect.
|8 weeks 1 day ago||"several bloody lips, banged-up noses and turf burns"||
Better call the United Nations... these are clearly human rights violations of the worst sort.