is there such a thing as an etsy genuis? if so, this is it.
Just three years ago, there as a damn countdown clock on ESPN. Now, it is just a noon fill on ABC with buzz only on our boards. Obviously, we did not keep up our side of the bargain by letting it get lopsided and then face planting the last two years, but man this is weird. I don't have any trash talk in my inbox, no texts or vmails like years past. The only calls I have gotten are from Iowa fans asking if we could try to make a game of it and luck out a win to help their bowl positioning. Not really a confidence boost. It is bitchy and whiny, but the only thing I have ever known is this being "the" rivalry. If I had been able to remember any different, maybe my perception of this would change.
Stealing a polo shirt, probably suspension at most.
I've put a little thought into the recent struggles and what to think of them. Then while watching Eastbound and Down Kenny Powers put it all into focus. During Chapter 6 of season one when he is giving his farewell speech he says one line that I think is a kind of accurate to Michigan. The line goes, "God wanted to show me hell, so that when I got back to heaven, I would finally appreciate it." I mean I know people who are Michigan fans that took going to a bowl or beating State for granted now all they want are those things back.
So, the question has been raised recently of how King of Belch keeps getting into the positive points, when all his posts are continually neg-banged. I, through some slothful sleuthing, have deduced the situation in its entirety:
King of Belch is actually *SHOCK AND DISMAY* the alter ego of Brian Cook.
Let us examine the facts:
1) How could he keep getting positive mgopoints, when he's constantly being neg-banged? Simple: Brian has ultimate control over points, and could award himself hundreds just to keep his head above water.
2) Why would he do this? Possibly, because Brian gets annoyed at having to say everything politically correctly and in support of RichRod, and King of Belch is simply his personal venting tool.
Seems pretty plausible to me.
I was wondering how UM fans could welcome back Justin Boren Sat.
Maybe the marching band could play something for him...but what?
I got an idea when reading once more some old news that's always nice to hear again. It was about Detroit news sources that “all but called Boren a pussy, who bailed on Rodriguez’s demanding new training regimen, a change from whatever Jazzercise Michigan was doing before. …”
They indicated that Boren, after the first spring practice, said the first workout was “grueling” and had the OL “constantly running back to the line of scrimmage in the no-huddle offense.”
The article continued:
“The only thing missing would be a key editorial decision to place an ad for tampon coupons right next to Boren’s head. “
So, I thought, maybe the band could play some Springstein, like
"Boren to Run."
Other suggestions welcomed.