The OP started this thread as a satirical piece.
USAToday running story about Buckeye Coach berating Kicker
Coombs is saying the player needs to stretch because of his position. Neglecting stretching is basically the only way a kicker is going to get hurt. Coombs is looking out for him not belittling him.
Oh no! People being mean?
I remember my football coaches calling our DL a bunch of "mental midgets" (his words, not mine). They sort of did give up 200 ypg rushing, so anyway.
The OL was referred to us a the "big, dumb and uglies" (again, coaches' words).
The skilled position dudes were called "princesses" or "glory boys" (i.e. needing frequent manicures and bubble baths after games).
Kickers? Well, our DE was our punter and PK and with a 47 yd punting avg and hitting 70 yd FGs in game warms up, coaches didn't swear much at our kicker.
Aren't football practices supposed to be a barrage of pejoratives? Most of us back then became callous to name calling and beratement from adult coaches by the time we were sophomores (16 yrs old). It doesn't lift you up, but at some point it didn't tear you down much either.
And water? If it was hot, we got water breaks. Otherwise, I remember it being mostly withheld until practice ended.
OP obviously never played football.
Soft. One time my high school coach kicked me in the throat. True story.
What I really want you to tell us now, is that you were on the debate team. Because that would be a good team with a coach like that.
A good kicker should know not to take himself too seriously.
I have yelled much worse things in front of kids' parents, and they haven't said a darn thing. Most people realize that when you're doing something wrong on a football field, you're going to get barked at for it. There are certain lines you can't/shouldn't cross, but this is much ado about nothing.
Response to your "Edit:". Bullshit. You didn't make any comments about sensationalizing nonsense stories. You sensationalized the story yourself.
Water is wet, the sky is blue, grass is green and Coombs is Coombs. Non-story here and a waste of time by USAtoday. I've heard worst playing varisty sports. Carry on, nothing to see here!