Jim Tressel waited. The lights above him blinked and sparked out of the air. There were Wolverines in the stadium. He didn't see them, but had expected them now for years. His warnings to Mark Dantonio were not listenend to and now it was too late. Far too late for now, anyway.
Jim was a football corch for thirty years. When he was young he watched the football games and he said to dad "I want to be on the field daddy."
Dad said "No! You will BE KILL BY WOLVERINES"
There was a time when he believed him. Then as he got oldered he stopped. But now in Michigan Stadium he knew there were Wolverines.
"This is Dantonio" the headphones crackered. "You must fight the Wolverines!"
So Jim gotted his Pryor and blew up the line.
"HE GOING TO KILL US" said the Wolverines
"I will armpunt" said Tate Forcier and he fired the ball. Jim ran, ran, pass, punted at him and tried to blew him up. But then the rain fell and they were trapped and not able to run.
"No! I must kill the Wolverines" he shouted
The headphones said "No, Jim. You are the Wolverines"
And then Jim was a zombie.
I thought that myself when I read that article that talked about a Data Scientist(tm)