T.J. Simers, Pete Carroll, and other Programs Pronounced Dead

Submitted by blueloosh on

Two disclaimers:

  1. I am not saying RR is Pete Carroll, or that Michigan in the 2010s will be USC in the 2000s.
  2. I fully acknowledge Carroll's horrendous USC debut lasted 7 games, not two seasons.

But if you are badly in need of humor, levity, and a thin ray of hope--read these archived 2001 articles, have a chuckle, and pray that in 2016 we can be having the same laugh reading 2008-09 articles about Rodriguez and Michigan.

Simers 10/10/01 - "USC Football Seems to Be Quickly Hitting the Wall"

Simers 10/21/01 - "Carroll Legacy Will Be Far Too Much To Bear"

Don

November 9th, 2009 at 7:30 PM ^

This Simers guy put both feet, his hands, his head and his dick in his mouth. I bet Carroll's had some nice laffs at his expense since then. I wonder if Simers ever wrote a follow-up column along the lines of "Jebus, was I wrong or what about Carroll?"

HeismanPose

November 9th, 2009 at 7:33 PM ^

"I've seen the glint in the kid's eye when he looks at my daughter, but even if he gets lucky and some day Mr. and Mrs. Grocery Store Bagger have my grandchild, at the 2-5 rate Carroll is going, the next T.J. is going to be an old man holding his own brat and still waiting for Carroll to impress."

That's creepy as HELL.

Drill

November 9th, 2009 at 7:40 PM ^

WHEN IT comes to making history, Carroll has already established himself in USC-Notre Dame lore as the fastest coach in the 73-year rivalry to pass the buck, making sure the public knew a botched fake punt was not his call.
...
The kid apparently had the option to kick or run.

joelrodz

November 9th, 2009 at 7:47 PM ^

Wow, had forgotten Carrol's earlier experiences at USC. Thanks for posting. The quotes below are particularly interesting considering events that have transpired these past 2 years at Michigan.

"The problem is he already has made it known he has been given a bunch of players who aren't very good"

"HAD THE sign read "Wall of Records" behind Carroll--USC at 1-4 off to its worst start in football since 1958--it would've made a nice picture for the cover of this week's GameDay program with the appealing headline: "Carroll's Trojans Can Match School's All-Time Worst Start of 1-5 in 1957 With One More Belly Flop."

"WHEN IT comes to making history, Carroll has already established himself in USC-Notre Dame lore as the fastest coach in the 73-year rivalry to pass the buck, making sure the public knew a botched fake punt was not his call."

PurpleStuff

November 9th, 2009 at 7:52 PM ^

Between him and that retard Plaschke, the LA Times has the worst sports writers in the country working outside of Southeast Michigan. All they do is try to stir up fake controversy and act like douches so people will get so pissed off that they don't realize they are still reading their crappy paper. Right around the same time Plaschke wrote an article announcing that UCLA's football program had officially taken over the city for the indefinite future.

Plaschke actually once said that having your kid play little league baseball is one of the worst things you can do to a child. Enough said.

Wolverine In Exile

November 9th, 2009 at 8:02 PM ^

I was a student at a conference in downtown LA and decided since it was a Saturday night to see if I could get tickets for the USC game since it was a 5 min taxi ride from the hotel. Had a beer at the student union and picked up a 40-yd line seat for $10. Went to the game (I think they were playing either Wash or Wash St), Carson Palmer was QB, USC lost, I got to see OJ... overall a good night. i remember leaving going, 'man, ucla's going to own these guys'