COLUMBUS, Ohio (AP)—Consultants have recommended that Ohio State University hire a vice president to oversee a new office responsible for monitoring compliance with rules and regulations in the wake of its football program’s NCAA infractions scandal.
So...the recommendation is...having another compliance office? Because the other one worked so well. Just...sigh. I quit.
In other news, water is wet...
Wow...
It doesnt fix the problem.
I would imagine because its redundant and if they couldn't run the compliance office before, Its highly debatable what adding more management will do.
Stay Fit, Be Sharp, Make Good Decisions.
Who cares. Lets worry about
Who cares. Lets worry about us, not them.
If they give this job to
If they give this job to Chris Spielman and it gets him out of the booth, then I am all for this .
That would actually be a
That would actually be a great hire for them. You know he'd cover everything. Deepest to deepest.
"Michigan Defense" is dominating everything, in every aspect of life. That's a rough definition.
-Craig Roh 10/29/2011
Pretty sure you mean deep as
Pretty sure you mean deep as the deepest, but yea. Point still stands.
Derp as the derpest?
Derp as the derpest?
"Mattison must break you. Jake Ryan is his tool."
I'm pretty sure he means
I'm pretty sure he means deepest to deepish.
The preferred phrase is
The preferred phrase is deeper than deepdish.
Deepak loves deepdish?
How
Deepak loves deepdish?
How existential of him...
Y'know, he grated on me so bad through most of last season, and
as time wore on, I realized that he actually DID know a thing or two about the game. With any other commentator, like Dakich in hoops, eventually I would have developed a grudging admiration. Spielman just continued to drive me crazy.
Is there still time for Tressel
to back out of the Akron position?
This seems ideal--at least until the job heading up the Ohio Lottery comes open.
I dont get it?
Don't they already have a complience office? What difference would a new VP make? Their real problem was obviously the original complience staff itself. If those people were doing their jobs to begin with then Ohio wouldn't have had the problems they experienced
A milestone:
This may be the first time my work has showed up as an avatar. This is fun.
Sportscenter.com raves: Sgt. Wolverine, "Michigan's biggest fan"!
As at most schools
the OSU compliance office is part of the athletic department and is headed by an assistant AD. Putting a VP in charge of compliance gets it out of the control of Smith (or Meyer or whoever's actually in charge of the department).
This is consistent with Gee's moves at Vanderbilt; I suspect it means the Trustees are finally seeing things his way and are going to give him direct control of athletics. Smith isn't going to be fired; his position is going to disappear.
If they do make another
If they do make another compliance office, they had better hope Urban Meyer does not dismiss them.
Well, since the current staff
Well, since the current staff is only good at reporting secondary violations, they need a new VP to chart a new direction. Like maybe actual compliance?
Naaahhhh.
Michigan Resurgent? Michigan Resurgent!
The beatings will continue until the uniforms improve!
I think I understand it
This new compliance office will make sure the old compliance office is complying. Soon, a third compliance office will be created to make sure the second compliance office is doing its job.
"I'm not a vegetarian b/c I love animals. I'm a vegetarian b/c I hate plants"
Ah, the consultants were
Ah, the consultants were working for the Department of Redundancy Department.
Michigan Resurgent? Michigan Resurgent!
The beatings will continue until the uniforms improve!
But first . . .
they have to hire a consultant to make recommendations about what use to make of the prior consultant's recommendations.
I love this
A new compliance office to make sure their various compliance offices are... wait for it... complying! Reminds me of this Onion article:
http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-starbucks-opens-in-rest-room-of-exi...
New OSU admin/message board talking point in 3,2,1: "We run the cleanest program in the country. Even our compliance offices have compliance offices."
Well obviously they need one
Well obviously they need one compliance office per coaching staff.
I think this is to make sure
Urban keeps his crank in his pants.
Would another one really
Would another one really help? This is Ohio for god's sake.
"He has an uncanny ability to get kids to believe in him and believe in themselves. He doesn't do it with smooth words. He's not smooth. He does it by being the same genuine person day after day." ~Jason Whitlock on Brady Hoke
clearly this
is an attempt to create an important sounding position so people think something has changed at OSU.
vomit
Is this another
compliance officer, to monitor their current compliance staff? if so, i would really recommend hiring a VP to watch the VP they hire, to watch the compliance staff....
Where do I apply for this
Where do I apply for this job?
Avatar is a reference to this. Go Blue!
Something about closing barn
Something about closing barn doors or possibly horses getting out.
Public employees. Ya gotta love 'em.
Let's pile our bureaucracy load just a little higher. Bee-Watcher-Watchers are just what the AD needs to solve its corruption problems.
Abort, Retry, Fail?
Neither the public nor private sector
has a monopoly on a misaligned organizational charts. Control/compliance was reporting to the people they were supposed to be controlling. I can think of plenty of private-sector examples of this, like a mortgage company having its head of underwriting report to the head of production (yes, this was done).
because at mortgage companies
the tail often wags the dog. "Underwriting guidelines? Screw that, we gotta keep the nubers up. Put 'em on a SISA and fill out the 1003 so it says they make 6k a month between their penison and social security"
/jargon'd
ALWAYS remember the golden rule: He who has the gold, makes the rules
So what does it say...
...that this arrangement is SOP in university athletic departments?
We've got a new one!
Entities realizing OSU lacked institutional control:
Hmm, there's only one left...
Do I need to buckle up?
Do I need to buckle up?
10,000 mgopoints for
10,000 mgopoints for infiltrating OSU compliance department with a tape recorder.
It's early yet...
...but this is the funniest news I've seen all year. This is like saying the Freep is going to create an ethics board.
The NCAA sanctions
The NCAA sanctions haven't affected football recruiting @Ohio, but look at the class they've put together to replace Buford and Sullinger with the NCAA sniffing around(2012 class of 0). Coincidence? I think not.
I see how this will go....
BRIAN: Are you the Ohio State Compliance Department?
REG: Fuck off!
BRIAN: What?
REG: Ohio State Compliance Department. We're the Department of Ohio State Compliance! Ohio State Compliance Department. Cawk.
FRANCIS: Wankers.
BRIAN: Can I... join your group?
REG: No. Piss off.
BRIAN: I didn't want to sell this stuff. It's only a job. I hate the NCAA Rules as much as anybody.
DEPARTMENT OF OHIO STATE COMPLIANCE: Shhhh. Shhhh. Shhh. Shh. Shhhh.
REG: Stumm.
JUDITH: Are you sure?
BRIAN: Oh, dead sure. I hate the NCAA Rules already.
REG: Listen. If you wanted to join the D.O.S.C., you'd have to really hate the NCAA Rules.
BRIAN: I do!
REG: Oh, yeah? How much?
BRIAN: A lot!
REG: Right. You're in. Listen. The only people we hate more than the NCAA are the fucking Ohio State Compliance Department.
D.O.S.C.: Yeah...
JUDITH: Splitters.
D.O.S.C.: Splitters...
FRANCIS: And the Ohio State Bureau of Compliance.
D.O.S.C.: Yeah. Oh, yeah. Splitters. Splitters...
LORETTA: And the Department of Ohio State Compliance.
D.O.S.C.: Yeah. Splitters. Splitters...
REG: What?
LORETTA: The Department of Ohio State Compliance. Splitters.
REG: We're the Department of Ohio State Compliance!
LORETTA: Oh. I thought we were the Bureau of Compliance.
REG: Compliance Department! C-huh.
FRANCIS: Whatever happened to the Bureau of Compliance, Reg?
REG: He's over there.
D.O.S.C.: Splitter!
I would give you all my
I would give you all my imaginary points if I could. Best use of Monty Python on the Internet I have ever seen.
He has a friend, you know. His name is Biggus Dickus.
"Anyone who isn't confused, really doesn't understand the situation." - Edward R. Murrow
You know...
He has a wife, you know. You know what she's called? She's called... 'Incontinentia'... Incontinentia Buttocks.
Gee to consultants
Gee to consultants recommending the new compliance department: "Get a life"
This was Gee's idea
This was Gee's idea (see his elimination of the AD position at Vanderbilt, with athletics folded into extracurricular student activities).
You bring in a consultant to give you the cover of expert opinion to do what you wanted to do anyway. Since the recommendations are perfectly aligned with Gee's past M.O., I think we can assume he was behind the hiring of the consultants.
But who's watching the
But who's watching the watchmen?
First, Ohio already has
a compliance office:
http://www.ohiostatebuckeyes.com/compliance
Second, what the fuck is this VP position going to do that the existing compliance management team and staff are not doing?
And if the existing compliance team is not doing that work, but the newly created staff will, then why are Ohio taxpayers and students funding it....twice???
Kind of dumb waste of valuable resources if you ask me. But it's high in the middle and round on both ends, so there you go.
I almost ejected my lunch through my nose
when you used the phrase "valuable resources" in reference to OSU's compliance management/staff.
"Valuable Resources" as in:
Why waste valuable resources on compliance when you could upgrade everybody's test drive vehicles?
Michigan Resurgent? Michigan Resurgent!
The beatings will continue until the uniforms improve!
all I can say is wow why is this not in place already?
21 years of coaching and every senior who stayed had at least 1 big ten title... That is what " Those who stay will be champions" will really get you Ohio native Bo Schembechler.