I basically hate everything Hawk Harrelson says, but that whole "you can put it on the board . . . YES!" has to be the worst ever.
OT: Worst TV Announcer sayings
I also hate the "He Gone" and the "Can O Corn"
I avoided him last weekend, if I have to listen to him on the extra innings package this weekend withe division on the line I will not be happy.
Hawk is such a homer that he makes Fox News and MSNBC blush.
He truly is the worst thing about White Sox baseball. And it's not like there are only a few things to choose from in terms of awfulness either.
My wife pointed this phrase out and now it is all I hear.
Yes I'm looking at you, Stuart Scott.
they say, well so and so hasn't had a fumble all day.
But I'd like to point out how annoying Pam Ward's "touchdown Wolverines" call was on Tate's touchdown run in the fourth. It was just awful.
Everything she said sounded awful. I do not know why they have that woman announcing sports. I want my announcers to be either masculine or feminine. I didn't know WHAT I was listening to until they showed her on screen.
When i made a comment about how horrible she was, my 8 year old son said "Thats a girl????"
Anything using Minor's name or containing an ESPN-generated pun.
Meh, could be just "stud bolt" comming out of Matt Millen's mouth.
I kinda liked stud bolt.
Combining the typical stud horse/bull reference with hardware... what could be more manly?
"this guy can flat out..."
I don't really like it when announcers say stuff like "got his bell rung" or "cleaned his clock" when they should say "has a possible concussion" or something like that. To me, it belittles the fact that a player has been injured, potentially seriously. I don't mind a good, clean hit...but announcers describing hits that cause concussions or other injuries in such a nonchalant way irks me.
"He's got a good motor in him."
Rod Allen is perfect for the jinx call in Tigers games this year. I cringe whenever he gives a stat.
the Announcer said "That's what we call giving him the skittles!"
reminds me of prison.
Seriously, what does that even mean?
Rascal. I heard it about a dozen times at PSU IOWA game. It drove me nuts!
Pam Ward. I'd go all Nucking Futs!
Pam Ward and her insistence on talking time of possession constantly had me yelling at the television. Anybody who gets paid to talk about sports should get no more than one possession to see that time of possession is not something the Wolverines value. She just kept saying it like a cliche.
I hate them talking about coaches...every single one is a "Great guys" or a "good coach" or something to that effect. Just once I'd like to hear an announcer to say "Beilema is way over his head" or "Mangini is just plain and simple not getting the job done" or "Bill Lynch is over matched in this game against _______)" I understand they're not in the business of insulting people but the Rod Allen-style love fest with every dude who's a headcoach is almost insulting.
Also: Anything Rod Allen says about any Tigers player current or former. They're all the greatest that's ever played and don't have a single weakness anywhere in their game and all should be starting in the all star game. Dude....wake up. Marcus Thames is DECENT bat and nothing else. Stop sucking him off every time he's up to bat.
marcus is country strong....
Yeah, I'm getting sick of Mario Impemba saying everything is "hit well."
"Marcus skies the ball -- and hit well!"
*ball drops in the middle of the outfield for an easy out*
"Well, Marcus had almost everything under that ball, but just couldn't get it out of here."
IT'S NOT "HIT WELL" WHEN IT'S A POP-OUT, BRO.
but not even close to rod. the stuff that comes of rods mouth is unreal. if i ever run into mario at a bar the first question i'm going ask him is: is there ever a time where you just look at rod and think, what the fuck did he just say?....
Rod and Mario are very good baseball announcers. They generally give good information and they know both the team and the game well. If you ever watch bad baseball announcing (readily found on ESPN, TBS, and most other teams regular broadcasts), you would see how lucky we are.
TV Baseball announcing is very difficult because you have to talk the whole game, when nothing is going on most of the time and when something does happen, everyone watching can tell what's going on for themselves.
Example of bad-baseball announcing: "Great breaking ball by Rodney"
(Fox national during a Saturday afternoon broadcast)
Example of good-baseball announcing: Rod and Mario keeping their mouths shut during Verlander's no-hitter.
there are times that mario and rod are good. but then there are times that rod just says things that don't make sense. also you can't compare broadcasters that do national games to the local guys. the guys on ESPN, FOX, and now TBS have to keep people interested through out the entire game, and they are not as close with the teams as the local guys. that is part of the reason why it sounds so generic at times. when TBS was only doing braves game, they by far had the best people calling games.
everyone loves mario and rod. but you have to be able to poke fun at them. thats why there is a rod allen drinking game.
Additionally what other announcers have this...
Why have announcers started saying this in the last year or so? That is all they say now when there is pressure on a quarterback. It really annoys me for some reason.
"Ya know, Hitler was a great leader too."
Pretty much everything Lou Holtz says is annoying and awful.
You weren't around last night, were you?
Easy on the Nazi reference CPS.
We wouldn't want anyone to get upset and post on it for hours on end.
Hey, there. Ain't tryin' to stir up no trouble. Just relayin' a lame comment from Holtz. Figured I should be the one to bring it in light of everything.
Comments about any form of "penetration" in a game are also cringe-worthy. "Gholston's ability to get penetration really closed that hole in a hurry!"
also, as a running back looks for a seam: "He's picking his hole."
At that point my wife says, "Ewwwwwwww."
once referred to "Gay penetration" while calling a college game in which Rudy Gay was playing.
here's mine. I think the NFL is contractually obligated to mention, at least once a quarter, how much Brett Favre loves playing football. As if he's the only one. It's nauseating, because it's normally right after he's thrown his third INT into triple coverage due to "gunslinging."
Of course, any other QB would be criticized for not properly "managing the game."
Aw, he's just a kid out there having fun.
Don't forget about the constant mentions of Farve's "toughness!"
Any highlight that is simply medium for a catchphrase. Heard on BTN, describing a TD, "I like turtles!" WTF? I get the reference, but come on.
"Trickeration" is especially awful because there's a perfectly good word already in the language for it: trickery.
-Trickeration is also a dumb word because it's used to describe common football plays that are not considered trick plays.
If you've been watching NFL football, common college tactics like faking punts, reverses, and (gasp) having two backs in the backfield who are a threat to carry the ball are considered "trickeration."
-Speaking of which, constant references to the NFL, like a player's draft status or how a player projects to a certain team's system, drives me up a wall. I am a hardliner but I have no interest in sucking up to the pro game.
-Also calling a sweep a "reverse" when the ball hasn't been handed off twice annoys me.
-Fixating on a certain player or storyline, no matter what happens in the game, just plain sucks. Brent Musberger loves to do this. They look like fools when their pet player gets lit up or injured.
does that ALL the time! Laurinaitis ought to give Brent half of his signing bonus for elevating his draft position 22 spots. It's super annoying - just call the game Brent!
Wayne Larivee, he called the EMU game, and did/ does lots of the marginal bball games uses the word "sunsplashed" like he gets a grand every time he says it.
He used it at least 4 times during the game. But will use it all the time, during promos/intos, in basketball games, where I don't usually care what the weather is outside.
"From Sunsplashed Ann Arbor (in February), its Michigan and Northwestern on the Big Ten Network..Next" I swear he said this.
It's like he sees the sun and has to mention it every 2 minutes.
Listen for it if he does the game Saturday and the sun is out.
I am told that announcers, because they travel quite a bit, will work a specific predetermined word or phrase into the broadcast to let their families know they are thinking of them. Perhaps "Sunsplashed" is Larivee's shout-out to the folks back home.
My working theory is that Larivee's a vampire and must avoid direct sunlight.
I also heard him say rugged run many times.
The one that drives me batsh!t crazy is when the color guy is describing a catch, particularly in the endzone, and he says that the receiver, "went up and got the ball at its highest point."
There is just absolutely no truth or logic to this. The ball is throw and follows an arc. At most, the ball is a foot or two higher than when it left the QB's hand. In most cases, it has been falling for about 50% of the time it has been in the air. Physics, gravity, geometry. I understand that these things are beyond most of the color guys out there, but there's just no excuse for this one.
Also, I'm tired of hearing about how Rodriguez is "embattled." The only reason he's "embattled" is because the idiot announcers keep saying he is.
Also, also, I rather have Pam Ward as play-by-play than Matt Millen doing color. (Did anybody else watch the Monday night post-game yesterday? He was awful there, too.)
as "A runaway beer truck". Or isn't wondering "what is Britney doing with her life?" during an SEC game in overtime.
Basically anything this guy says is annoying (might have mispelled his name, don't really care to know though)
It's hard to admit it, but I think he is one of the few guys that knows what he is talking about
"We talked to him last night..."
"When we talked to him last week..."
"I was talking to Coach Rodriguez and he told me..."
Or any other variation on that theme. It's like they're rubbing it in that their job is to cover sports and a constant reminder that I don't get to do that.
Dick Vermeil used to be the worst in this regard. After listening to him call a game, you would imagine that he weighed more than 400 lbs, because somehow or another, he managed to have dinner with every single coach on each staff the previous week. Furthermore, every one of those coaches would tell him that some unknown player was really the best athlete on their team.
It is awesome when Rod Allen does this, because:
a) you have to drink, per the Rod Allen Drinking Game, and
b) I think he knows that we know he's lying.
Announcers calling every offense with a mobile QB in the shotgun the Wildcat
Very annoying to me for some reason. Especially when it's a quarterback taking the snap.
I meant to link to http://awfulannouncing.blogspot.com/
If you find this topic at all interesting, you will LOVE this website. Heading over there a second ago, I saw this Pam Ward gem from Saturday, "Pushed out of bounds by Mouton....touchdown Indiana."- Pam Ward
Anywone who invented "the Pammy's" is 100% pure genius.
However, if Mike Patrick isn't the biggest douche out there, then I'm just in a different universe or something. How did a nerd with no knowledge of football ever come to attain a position doing prime-time play-by-play... Mind-boggling.
Because everything is "LIVE!!!".
"We're at the Horseshoe LIVE!"
"That fan is throwing a full beer can at my head LIVE!!"
"I'm eating frosted mini-wheats in my skid-marked underwear LIVE!"
"I can't believe we're LIVE!!"
but I like Musberger. He is cheesy but I still like him.
I think Musberger is a great caller for big plays, and he's sometimes pretty funny, too.
But sometimes he really misses... see the 2003 ND-Mich game, a 20 yard pass to Carl Tabb in the first quarter might as well have been the game winner because of the over-expression he utilized.
I also hate the "we've got a real barn burner on our hands, folks" cliche.
I can't stand how Musberger pronounces "measurement" like "May-sure-ment." Nails on a chalkboard.
me off everytime I hear a golf announcer say...
"What a beautiful golf shot" or something similar.
Dude, we are f'ing watching golf...we know it is a golf shot. You don't hear anyone saying that was an excellent baseball pitch, or an awesome football run, etc. Just stop it.
"For a big guy..."
Notably, when Berman shrieks "WHAAAAAT" at the top of his lungs and continues his tired tradition of making up funny names or when Stuart Scott says...anything.
is simply a goddess and i won't stand for any of you insulting her. Time of possession is possibly the most important stat in all of football. They tend to give such stats to their best announcers. Besides, she is just so darn cute!
So you were the guy I saw her making out with after the game on Saturday! I thought your photo looked familiar! If this thing between you two kids gets serious, let's hope your future kids get their looks from dad's side of the family.
"John Madden here". God I almost ran out of the room screaming ever time i heard that. I'm glad he's retired.
followed by the cliche "That's just pitch and catch."
"He's very Wes Welker-like ... surprisingly athletic."
I love him, he's hilarious, he's a bafoon, he's a lunatic, and half the stuff he says doesn't even make sense but at least he's not the main play-by-play guy. I think its ok to have the color commentator be a lunatic, but the White Sox lunatic is their play by play guy and it gets annoying.
I'll add a quote (I'm 99% positive it was Rod Allen not Impemba that said it this year)
"Marcus Thames is in the game because he's hot and he's a hooker"
(For those who aren't Tigers fans or don't know much about Rod Allen/Marcus Thames he was referring to him being on a hot streak at the time and tending to pull the ball down the line from time to time)
I just now caught this, but I had to jump in even though it's old. IME Rod Allen is actually one of the smartest baseball guys I've ever heard call a game. He might be a bit of a goofball and speak with a bit of a drawl (and further is guilty of overusing the "if you then you" construct that I hate so much) but don't sleep on his knowledge. He's always dropping little "hey that makes a lot of sense" tidbits and he's like 75% accurate in predicting the next pitch when he chooses to do so.
And he knows players' tendencies too. Perfect example: Tonight he mentioned that Orlando Cabrera is one of the best players in baseball at hitting the high fastball and you have to avoid throwing him that pitch. The very next pitch from Bonine was a high fastball that Cabrera ripped into right field for a hit. Allen knows what he's talking about better than just about anyone out there. He's anything but a buffoon.
The one that drives me bat-shit crazy is "National Football League." As in "He's one of the toughest running backs in the National Football League." Or "If you want to make it as a player in the National Football League..." I mean, we all know we're watching a professional football game, please don't be afraid to use "NFL."
Jaworski is the archetype of this, but if you pay attention you'll see almost everyone using it at some point when it doesn't really need to be said.
"Did you know that Tim Tebow..."
"Great play by Tebow"
"What a great young man Tim Tebow is"
"Anyone who has been in the presence of this young man (Tebow) is a better person for it"
I'm not even exaggerating.
Or the CBS annouce teams. They have been so far up his ass I think Verne or Gary might turn into diamond in the next few weeks.
Sorry for that visual at lunch time. :-)
GOES THE DYNAMITE.
This video never gets old...
must have said "pre-snap penalty" about a thousand times last Saturday. Every time there was a false start, "Another pre-snap penalty!" and then a remark about how many pre-snap penalties had occured in the game. Enough dude, you hate false starts, offsides, and illegal formation. We get it.
... Boom goes the dynamite.
Edit: Just noticed it was posted a little bit ago... crap. Plus one for Devin Gardner dude.
Anything Lou Holtz says. I can't actually provide any quotes because the man's speech is indiscipherable. I do know he was speaking, though, because I'm covered in spittle....anyone have a towel?
I'm Ok with a walk off homer but now we have walk off singles. Last week SportsCenter offered up a walk off sacrifice. Sheesh.
It just sounds so invented.
Also, one of the most unimaginative terms in sportscasting today is microcosm. Eddie Olcyzk used that cliche once every period for every game in the Finals this year.
"That play is a microcosm of Datsyuk's entire year, blah blah blah."
I'm waiting for TAINT (touchdown after INT) to come into vogue. I think Bill Simmons has commented on this. The announcer would inevitably say, "Man, what a nice TAINT." Makes me want to puke.
To announcer abuses. How about this one: "Verlander is on the bump for tonights game." Bump?
The HOUSE, baby!
Mike Tirico: "He just turned ___ into a screensaver!"
One, calling an end-around a reverse. Also its evil twin: calling a reverse a double-reverse. I HATE THIS. When did a simple end-around become a reverse?
Two, and this is the most annoying shit ever. Whenever announcers say, "If you're ______ then you ______." As in, "If you're Tate Forcier you can't be throwing that ball over there." Or, "If you're Michigan you have to love what you see out of this game." Or, "If you're Rich Rodriguez you have to etc. etc." you get the idea.
There is a zero percent chance that anyone listening to the broadcast while you're talking is Tate Forcier. Just fucking say, "Tate Forcier shouldn't have thrown that ball." The only acceptable use of this construct is, "If you're a Michigan fan then...." because yes, some of the audience is a Michigan fan.
Where a boxing announcer, describing a knockout, screams "unbelievable, unbelievable, UNBELIEVABLE!" Hey fella, its a BOXING match. And its unbelievable to see a guy knocked out?
This is Michigan's "deepest penetration" of the day. Makes me feel dirty.
"Boy, what a bad time to commit that penalty/cough up the football."
I'm sorry. Are there GOOD times to do those things?
that Denard Robinson doesn't tie his shoes makes me want to blow my head off. Talk about beating a dead horse.
Go back to hearing about how the Threet family has had season tickets for years? I'm kinda happy at this point to take recurring references to Denard's preference of shoe fasteners.
He doesn't tie his shoes?
Pretty much any time the ball is in the middle of the field on 4th and short an announcer will say it's "Decision Time" for Coach X.
Isn't it decision time on every down? It's called "calling the plays".
but I just hate to hear the phrase "pitch and catch". Especially when Kirk Herbstreit says it.
......I can't listen to him anymore.......
Also, listening to the NFL guys get all giddy like a school girl every time they mention the "wildcat formation"....wildcat.....wildcat........big deal, they hike to a RB or something......high schools and college have been doing variations of this forever.
Anything about young qaurterbacks needing to "just manage the game"... so sick of that phrase.
Or Rod Allen saying about a pitcher "he brings his great _____ with him to the mound EVERY FIFTH DAY"
I have two:
1. From basketball: "score the ball," as in, "Michigan just needs to score the ball and they'll be all right."
2. This one's more specific and nerdly. I hate when Troy Aikman inserts the word "what" needlessly into sentences, as in: "Romo panicked a little there. The pressure wasn't nearly as bad as what he thought it would be." or "Manningham has more speed than what the Giants thought he had."
"Irregardless of _______" is the dumbest phrase ever. What does that word actually mean?
Also, the whole RBIs vs RBI thing is silly. Call them RBIs, technically RBI is an acronym and the acronym plural is (RBI)s or RBIs. To be absolutely accurate I guess it would be RsBI which sounds stupid.
Also also: "Pound the rock" and "a down-hill running team". Is there such a thing as an uphill-running team? Does that mean they don't run hard or are slow.
Also, also, also: "ill-advised pass" If it's an interception than...duh.
I hate it when announcers say a team "has to punt" or "has to settle for a field goal." Ignorant announcers perpetrate the myth that 3rd down is the end of the story. More often than not, going for it on 4th and short is the better play, and intelligent announcers would at the bare minimum mention the possibility of going for it.
"I hate it when announcers say a team "has to punt" or "has to settle for a field goal." Ignorant announcers perpetrate the myth that 3rd down is the end of the story. More often than not, going for it on 4th and short is the better play, and intelligent announcers would at the bare minimum mention the possibility of going for it."
I think a big part of this is that former players are overwhelmingly represented as gameday commentators. I can't remember the last time even a coach was a color man, let alone someone who hasn't been cut a check from an athletic organization. Then you start to realize that many former athletes were paid to play the sport, not necessarily understand it or come up with ideas, so you understand why their observations are trite and they are indoctrinated into the conventional wisdom of your sport. Too many are like that guy from Miami who said he wanted to get into the on-field fight with Fla Intl - caught up in the spirit of the ballgame and/or the banter in the booth, without really thinking that people are listening.
One thing that drives me nuts on this front is broadcasters laughing it up in the booth over some joke that has nothing to do with the game.
And for some reason the play by play guys are jocksniffers (witness the Tim Tebow obsession) so they are star-struck and never debate these fools behind the scenes. I suspect the producers are as well, since I never hear these guys get any better.
- "Ball club," specifically when referring to football teams
The two I can't stand: From multiple sports, any time a fight breaks out, we hear "Extra-curricular activities". Just say "fighting" instead.
From basketball: "Three-point land", as if it's some break-away former Soviet Republic.
"Hold on folks..." Of course this has great value in the Brent Musberger drinking game, along with other Musberger quotes.
It's a little too late for this, but I adapted the Musberger drinking game to the Little League World Series. The list as follows is by no means complete:
1 drink if:
-the word "youngsters" is said (very common)
-"folks" of course still applies
-when mentioned, "in the little league game.." to distinguish it from MLB
-whenever mom is shown in the stands (must be ID'd as mom first)
-a kid cries
-a kid under 100lbs bats
-a kid over 6ft bats
2 drinks if:
finish your drink if:
-Musberger calls a HR before the ball goes over the fence
-you don't "hold on"
-Pete Caroll or Charlie Weis are mentioned
-Tim Tebow mentioned
eh, I'm bored with this. feel free to add to this...
1. The use of "literally" when the speaker actually means "figuratively."
2. The phrase "spin cycle" when a basketball or football player executes any sort of spin move. Any announcer is almost guaranteed to use this phrase when Dwyane Wade is involved.
"If so and so hadn't been tackled, that could have been a touchdown(!)". Well, no shit Sherlock.
Also, "Now its a football game" when the score gets closer, as if they were playing cricket beforehand.
but now, every time I hear "impact player" I want to scream.
"Hi, I'm Pam Ward" or "Welcome to another ESPN showing of [insert big ten teams here]. I'm Pam Ward, here along with Ray Bentley."
"With me in the booth is Lou Holtz and Mark May."
...an announcer - usually in basketball - starts going on about how "long" a player is when referring to wingspan, as in, "Wow, Brent Petway in the Michigan frontcourt is so long, he really makes the opposing team think before driving the lane."
I mean, I though Petway was great and all, but really, there are some things about my athletes that i just don't want to know...
I can never tolerate "and MSU steals the game. Wow did the refs miss that call"
"The defense has to pin their ears back for this one". Pam "man hands" Ward loves that phrase. Im also sick of hearing Craig James rant about Georgia at the begining of every season, predicting a NC. A WAC playoff was also referd to as a WAC-off last week by some turd trying to get laughs as well. Very witty.
"The Spartan run defense has literally killed Michigan in this game."
No, it hasn't. Nobody is dead.
...there's nothing more annoying than hearing this: "Yankees win! Yankees win! THEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Yankees win!"