You can't help but feel bad for the kid. 18 years old and one really bad decision ended everything!
OT: Top 100 BBALL Recruit Tony Farmer
This is a damn shame. He apparently had a world of talent and a bright future many people would be jelouse of. This reminds me of Denards big ten kick off speech. When he talked about all the great athletes who were derailed by bad decisions and how easy it was to make those wrong choices.
That being said I don't feal bad that a person who would assault and kidnap someone is being removed from society so they can't harm others.
A "bright future"? Maybe if you consider "future" to only refer to throwing an orange ball through a hoop. He is on tape dragging a woman by her hair and beating her. Our culture is too permissive and accepting of athletes as "good people" simply because they can play a child's game at a high level. If he wasn't an "athlete" and this was in the news, not a single person would be claiming that it's a "shame". They would simply call him trash, a thug, a brute, and move on with their lives. Such woman-beating scum deserve to be treated with the same scorn as any other neanderthal who drags women by their hair. Spare me the "poor baby" garbage. And I guess he was "man" enough to pop a woman in the face, but not to face the consequences. Good, I'm glad he is going to prison, he deserves it.
Wow not sure where I said he should be getting away with anything or that he was a man for popping a woman in the face. Pretty sure I said I didn't feal bad that he was going to prison. What I meant about the bright future was that he was going to get a chance at a free college education.
I think it is a damn shame when any young person ruins there life through stupidity and crime. I feal bad for the victim and the perp deserves to be in jail. I guess I am a bad person since I wish the whole incident hadn't happened the woman wouldn't be a victim and a 18 year old kid wouldn't be going to prison for you and I to pay for his ass to rot.
with the whole societal acceptance it relation to things of this nature being a little alarming. It bothers me that society is tolerant of such behaviour, but what bothers me even more is the women who tolerate it when there is an obvious way out.
I recall an afternoon I was travelling home from work and witnessed something very similar to this happening in a gas station parking lot. A man in his late 20's was dragging a woman by the hair across the parking lot and was attempting to throw her into his car. I couldn't believe no one in the parking lot was doing anything.
I pulled into the lot and got out of the truck a little leary, but grabbed the man and pulled him off the girl. It was clear by this time the woman was his girlfriend and not an abductee, but she was screaming and trying to fight back so I pinned the guy against the car and we were having words when his girlfriend jumped on my back and put me in a choke hold screaming to let her boyfriend go or she would call the cops.
I couldn't believe what was happening. Dismayed, I threw the woman off my back and got back into my truck and drove off remembering the phrase "no good deed goes unpunished". The next evening I was on call and while attending to another patient who should come in to the hospital via ambulance....the same women, this time beaten within an inch of her life. Sometimes there is just no helping people.
Unfortunately this sort of thing happens a lot. Abusive relationships have deep psychological affects on everyone involved, and often times the abused still sympathises with the abuser. Other times, the abused may think it is best to just take it now, and may fear what would happen later if the abuser was interrupted prematurely. I'm not an expert on this sort of thing but I've heard many stories similar to yours. While people have great intentions, interrupting abuse like this, unless someone is asking for help, often ends up making the situation worse for everyone.
Sadly the woman depicted above may have felt compelled to jump on Blue In Yarmouth's back in a futile attempt, as it turned out, to forestall a future beat-down.
I knew a retired Detroit Police officer who said it was often the woman who would call police,(before caller ID), concerning a woman being abused, when the cops would arrive, the woman would rush to her man's side, begging police not to take him away. It was a sound strategy on the woman's part, if the man knew his woman called the police, she would face the consequences later. By his telling, these woman would put on a show of epic proportions to feign their loyalty to their man.
Whenever I see situations like this, i steer clear. It's the woman who chose to be in that relationship.
Call me old fashioned, but I couldn't just look the other way in a situation like that. Coincidently, it is because of MY upbringing that I can't. My father always taught me to stick up for people who can't stick up for themselves, so no matter the potential outcome I wouldn't be able to stand by watching.
This is one of the problems with how out of hand bullying has gotten over the years. When I was in school I was considered one of the "popular" kids because I played on all the sports teams and was quite rebellious (and therefore "fun"). I was fortunate not to have been the target of bullying and was never a bully myself, but some of the other jocks/popular crowd were.
I remember once witnessing another "popular" kid throw an over weight kid in a snow bank while they were going to the buses. I was on my bus, so couldn't do anything about at the time. The next day i spoke to the over weight kid and told him to meet me outside after school.
When the bully came out I grabbed him and told him to wait with me a minute. When the overweight kid came out I told the bully he was going to sit back and let the overweight kids get his revenge in front of all the onlookers. If he fought back I was going to be there to take the overweight kids place.
It was a great experience the for kid, to get payback for all the times he was bullied and the whole group of people watching him cheered him on.
I'm not sharing that story to toot my horn as I am far from being anyone to emulate. I have made more bad decisions in life than probably the rest of this board put together. But one thing I can't and won't do is look the other way when someone is getting abused in anyway (male or female). If that gets me in trouble, at least I can say I did all I could.
I never gave him anything because he was an athlete, I personally felt bad because that video was sad. I'm aware he deserves a prison sentence but if you watch that and don't at least think, "Well, that's too bad, kid blew his chance." Then your anger is overtaking you a bit. You're allowed to feel bad for a bad guy in this case, I was shocked how he just couldn't comprehend the amount of time he was given. Too Bad..
I don't feel bad for this kid at all.
I feel bad for the victim, not Farmer. He's getting what he deserves. Hopefully he'll learn that life lesson that we all need to learn at some time in life -- you're not allowed to kidnap and assault people.
That is easy for you and I to say because we probably had decent upbringings. Some of these kids get carried away in the moment and do not realize the consequences of their actions. They are lacking that father/mother figure in their life and learn by their failures. I, as well, feel bad for the victim, but I hope if nothing else this kid learns from his mistakes.
and I believe the victim, his ex-girlfriend asked the judge to not give Framer jailtime
Oh, spare me the crocodile tears. Suddenly because someone grows up without a father figure it is fine to abuse a woman? Millions of people have grown up in disadvantaged situations in one way or another and turned out fine. What type of household would he have grown up in which beating a woman is condoned? Our culture consistently makes excuses for poor behavior rather than forcing people to own up to their own actions. If he didn't want to spend time in jail, collapse like stuck pig in court, and lose a basketball scholarship, HE SHOULDN'T HAVE BEATEN A WOMAN. Holy moly, that was easy now wasn't it?
Refering to the second point, once allegations are made and charges are filed, the state attorney's office takes over and the victim has little influence over the outcome of the case. Why? What if the courts allowed children to influence their parents' sentences if they were abused? It cannot happen because there is a conflict of interest which threatens the intended impartiality of the court system. Also: battered women often feel that they are to blame for the situation, rather than placing the onus on the lowlife.
Nobody is condoning anything. Should he go to jail...of course! Should he pay for his actions... yes. Some of these kids grow up around violence and crime. When that is all you see on a daily basis, how could you possibly say they know what is right and wrong. By 18, one would think that he would, but I can say without a doubt that he definitely realizes that now. All I was saying is it is too bad he didn't realize that sooner.
Ignore him. Classic troll.
Dollars to donuts she probably abused him too.
Lets accuse some more violent crime victims of felonies without any evidence!
Also, physically, it totally makes sense that he was a repeated victim of her physical abuse. Most guys who are 6'7 220 and insanely athletic can't stop a physical attack from an eighteen[ish] year old woman. Being a foot shorter and 100lbs lighter is a real advantage when trying to get physical with someone.
When you're 18 you damn well know the difference between right and wrong.
Kidnapping and beating a woman is getting carried away in the moment??
Everybody has a god damned excuse for everything these days! No, this is an ADULT who beat a woman and got jailtime that he absolutely deserved. Actions have consequences, good or bad.
At what point do people who have had bad things happen to them have to take responsibility for their actions. This is a serious question?
All too often we hear about criminals throwing out excuses about their upbringing as if that is reason to break the law, or at the very least an viable excuse once you're caught.
Honeslty, my brother-in-law in 40 years old and behaves like a teenager. He and my sister can barely make ends meet and are often bugging my widowed mother for help financially because they need food or diapers or some other foolishness.
He makes almost 70K a year and my sister makes 50k+. When ever he wants something for himself, he goes out and buys it with no thought about how he will feed his kids or pay the bills. The guy has 2 souped up 3-wheelers, a gsx-r 900, two dirt bikes (a cr 500 and cr 250) two new vehicles plus smoke about 200 dollars worth of weed a week.
When I have brought this up with my sister or mother it always comes back to his upbringing. The last time I debated it I was too angry to bite my tongue and finally asked them the question I posed at the beginning of this post..How long can people hide behind the fact that they had a difficult upbringing? Does that give you a free ride through life, a card to play anytime you make a mistake? At some point you have to take responsibility for your actions regardless how difficult your past has been.
many people who have tough upbringings and still live a responsible and morally sound life. The "bad upbringing" is at best a simplistic rationalization of criminal conduct.
I am sorry but I cannot feel bad for the kid... Can I feel bad that he threw away a chance to play basketball and could have been good, sure. However I feel nothing for this kid other than that he did this to himself and will have to deal with the decisions he made.
I don't feel sorry for him at all. From reports he is caught on film dragging his ex by her hair in the parking lot ... I don't take domestic abuse or kidnapping lightly. This guy got what he deserves. Hopefully he can learn from it and come out a better man.
He just got hit with roundhouse kick of reality in that video
Does anyone know when Michigan offered this kid? Was it before the charges were filed I hope?
Yeah... As soon as this incident happened his offers dried up pretty quickly. There was no waiting for the legal system to handle it, pretty much all the high profile schools dropped his offer.
but he got what he deserved. hopefully he'll embrace his time behind bars and become a much better, smarter and stronger person.
I'm 99.99999% sure they're wrong about Farmer having a Michigan offer.
It is mentioned in the article who was recruiting and who had offered.
Farmer, a 6-foot-6 forward, was one of the top 100 prospects in the class of 2013. Michigan, Michigan State, Ohio State, Iowa, West Virginia and Illinois were courting him, according to rivals.com. U-M had offered him a scholarship, the site reported.
Is this inncorrect? I honestly hope it is.
They don't even mention him.
Not to bash umhoops but they are not the most reliable source. The site is rarely updated (i.e. the depth chart still has Morris, Novak, and Smotty). And Farmer went to the same Garfield Hts HS that had Trey Lewis (Penn State) and Carl Jones (St. Josephs) and they were ranked no. 1 in ohio in 2008 and 2009. So there was plenty of attention on that team in Cleveland and there was an article in the Plain Dealer in Cleveland that had a direct quote from Beilein about his offer as well as Thad Matta and Izzo expressing interest. This was of course before the assault last april. But I believe all offers were pulled or on stand still til trial. Link... I dont have one.
Beilein discussing a high school athlete with the media before he's signed his LOI would be an NCAA violation (with very few exceptions). I'm not saying Farmer didn't have an offer, but you're probably misremembering the article.
Rivals reports him having a scholarship from Michigan....
the article also suggests that, while Michigan offered, "most schools" were waiting to see how this played out. Ok, true, I guess, if you think that most schools not offering equates to 4 out of 14 (the other 10 on his rivals list offers)
Scout only list 3 offers, Dayton, Xavier and West Virginia. Rivals lists 10 including Illinois and Wisconsin too. Somebody is way off with their info.
I'm not mad at Farmer, but this really is a case of "sometimes, you get what you deserve."
I mean, the assault and kidnapping were filmed!! I really wonder if Farmer always felt entitled as an athlete to do whatever he wanted with impunity and no repercussions. One of the sad consequences of no consequences is shock when the boom finally falls on your head. My only hope is that Farmer learns from this experience and turns his life around. But I wouldn't be surprised if he felt that he was wrongly accused, charged, and punished. A key component of growing up is taking it like a man. Be responsible for your own actions. Hard lesson for all of us, including me.
I don't care what background you come from...dragging a girl around by her hair, kidnapping her, and beating her up will get you jail time. Or at least, you HOPE it will get you jail time.
As far as his career, it's not necessarily over. How many people actually do 100 percent of their sentence? He could be out in a year or a year and a half. One of my former colleagues is a counselor in prison. If he gets a guy who ACTUALLY wants to turn his life around and commits to the process, there are any number of people that will help him. The problem is that so many people in jail are so broken that turning their life around isn't really possible.
If he commits to the process and works hard, he could get a ride to a JUCO or a smaller school. There are any number of people who've behaved worse over a longer period of time who have gotten another chance.
I never did anything remotely close to this, but I had a pretty self-destructive youth. At one point, someone told me, "You must be the most motivated person in the world." I asked him why he thought so and he said, "Because you've burned every bridge behind you."
At this point, it's up to him how the story ends...
After reading the New York Daily News article and seeing video of the assault, the guy deserves it. He apparently threatened her with violence even after he was arrested.
...in America should show this video to their teams before every season. It can happen, it does happen, and if players screw up, it will happen. So many high school kids have ruined their lives because they lose control of situations and/or think they are untouchable. Many players are told they are the greatest and that only helps cultivate the untouchable feeling. The kid did get what he deserves, bottom line. And because of that, I'm not sad for him, I'm sad for the victim. Nevertheless, it's still a shame when any kid his age ruins their future like this.
You can't take domestic assault lightly. That is how people end up seriously injured or dead. Who knows what he would have done the next time he got mad at his girlfriend or someone else.
I feel bad for whoever conjured the phrase "shit hits the fan." Probably had to suffer the consequences from shit hitting the fan in person.
It's hard to feel too bad for the kid when you consider the crime... until you watch that video. That broke my fuckin heart.
Watching that video was awful. The soul-crushing look on his face and then he collapses. Don't get me wrong, he deserves it. Probably deserves more. But man you can see exactly what he is feeling.
If watching this video will help at least one kid from making the same mistakes in the future, with time Tony Farmer can look at that as vindication.
after his time is served? I know schools are really wary of admitting violent felons, and it's been a clause on every lease I've ever signed (and particularly stood out for on-campus housing). If he does get a second chance after this, I have to believe it's in large part due to his basketball ability.
Also, he's elegible for any type of release after 180 days?!?!?! After a guilty plea to assault, robbery, kidnapping and victim intimidation? This sentence being concurrent and only amounting to three years is disturbing.
It's a hellava drug
of the incident is hard to watch, and so is the footage of him collapsing in court. The young woman that he attacked can be seen crying next to his mother, and bolting out of the courtroom. Tony's shock and questions to his lawyer makes me wonder if he was expecting community service or something. This whole thing is sad, but he deserves more jail time. It will be interesting to see where he ends up playing if the judge releases him when she reviews his sentence in 180 days. I knew that he had Ohio State, Illinois, and Michigan State offers, but this is the first time I've heard that Michigan was interested in recruiting him.
Trey Burke had some pretty strong feelings about this on twitter.
I'm sorry I went and read his twitter. I'm just going to forget what I just read and enjoy him as a basketball player. Good god...
After watching him beat that girl I have no remorse what so ever...hit a girl, do a man's time
Good!!! I have no pity for someone like this. Hopefully he can find his way during his prison term, probably not though. No excuse to go after someone you "care" about and repeatedly hit them and try to drag them away to inflict more damage.
Trey looked like an idiot on Twitter, sadly... I dont care if its his friend or not, but he was saying stuff like 'WHERE IS THE JUSTICE... FREE TONY'.... No Trey, no... your boy beat the piss out of a GIRL...