May God have mercy on your soul.
alternate headline: man does job
May God have mercy on your soul.
I do get a front row seat to watch JT and the program go down in flames, I hope
How's this for a front row seat...
I bartend on tsio's campus and got to see Pryor puke and get a drink thrown on him last weekend. He came in with Posey and a couple of really big guys...
All things considered, Columbus is not that bad. Aside from the obvious, it's a pretty cool city. If you insulate yourself from the couch burners (I don't know if I mean that literally, or not) then everyone down here is pretty cool too.
My brother goes to OSU and is lifelong Michigan fan as I am. If you're around campus it's very hard to root for M and not get harassed...Anywhere else you should be good
I lived on Indianola Ave. between Maynard and Patterson in 1986. After the game I put on my Michigan hoodie and walked down toward campus. I still recall some of the students who were making their way back from campus telling me, rather good naturedly, that I was too young to be wearing that sweatshirt. I never lived in Columbus as an adult, but I was never really harrassed when sporting the maize and blue. This was before the abyssmal Cooper years though. I remember going back in 93ish and seeing stores on high street across from campus selling Michigan shirts in the windows and being totally in shock.
that second photo just ruined my entire week.
Wear a Kevlar vest at all times.
just don't wear it when you go to talk to a person who is a witness in a criminal investigation against you.
Open a tattoo business. I hear the market is fantastic down there.
EDIT: Also, invest in a gas mask. That city smells downright putrid.
He can burn them to keep warm.
on having a nice basketball season, and apparently managing to do it without cheating like in football.
What makes you think Matta's program is clean?
the premise for the movie Idiocracy was based on Columbus. Hope you like Brawndo.
That movie was really underrated.
Seriously, good luck.
so the choice was kind of made for us.
I suggest avoiding confrontation as much as possible. When they make a joke about Michigan, just ignore it. When they realize that it doesn't bother you, they will stop doing it. It's like playing dead for a bear.
If that doesn't work, I suggest you invest in lots of saran wrap and a set of microscope slides.
As a person who lives only 30 minutes away from Columbus, if you don't let the jokes roll over you then be prepared to be in fights a lot.
Good luck though.
Add arson to your hobbies and burn that mother effing place down...
Wait, wait, wait...you married an OSU grad?
Seriously. If this guy intentionally married an OSU grad, then he clearly has bigger issues than figuring out where to watch a game on Saturdays!
Hey man, dumb chicks put out. And are usually hot.
the suggestion of lots of Michigan fans, as expressed on certain noteworthy T-shirts.
Very Good Point. Proceed Full Speed Ahead Sir!
to why someone would want to move to columbus.
This is all I could muster
And I think that sums it up.
that happens in Columbus, Ohio is the Arnold schwarzenegger Classic. I hope this helps. PIP.
and they havent played a game in Cleveland since 1994, so that'll be fun too
I live just outside St. Louis and I tell myself every year that when the wings come to town I'm going to a game but I never follow hockey close enough to know when the wings come to play the blues until I hear about it on the radio the next day.
1. Work from home.
2. Order all goods online.
3. Send your wife out for all groceries and lots of alcohol.
4. Please God, when the time comes, home-school your kids.
5. Lots of anti-depressants.
Ultimately, you may have to cut your losses and divorce your wife.
It would be really really easy to have your children subverted to satansism (you know... become OSU fans) right under your nose down there. Do NOT let them associate with the rabble until they are old enough to say no.
Well... to say the least your weekends will change. I live here as a Michigan fans amongst family and friends who love the *uckeyes. You will catch every Michigan football and b-ball game on tv due to regional coverage and BTN, so no worries there.
You will not find a Michigan Bar here etc... If you are able to stay south of campus, you will really enjoy the city FWIW. I love the arena district and the short north has a few good bars too. However, don't expect to escape almost every idiot talking about the *uckeyes. Some of the most rewarding moments come when you watch the *uckeyes fail in a bar of mainly tOSU fans.. So you'll have that too, unfortunately those haven't happened too often the past 5 years.
It's a rough life but it can be done with some sanity. The drive to AA is only 3 hours away.
Good Luck and Go Blue!
Gallo's on bethel by microcenter is where the alumni assoc watches games.
I've never gone, but I get email about it every week in season.
I've hit that bar for lunch exactly once. While the food I ordered was decent, the fact that it took over an hour to prepare a burger and fries turned me off to the service a tad. But, hey. If that's the place to watch a Michigan game, that's super convenient.
Best neighborhood in the city, IMO.
To the OP: If you stay out of Upper Arlington and the university area, you probably won't get hassled much. Hell, last year, I was at the game, and I didn't see much hassling even on Lane Avenue. A 7 game winning streak works wonders for fan behavior in a rivalry.
So I know exactly what you're about to go through man.
All I can say is get a thick skin and be prepared to laugh it off, because logic and facts will never win an argument in Columbus. Luckily Cleveland has prepared you for these ridiculous arguments. I'm sure like myself you've heard numerous discussions making the case for why almost every draft pick should be used on a fuckeye.
(I have already heard that we should draft Cameron Heyward in the 1st round instead of reaching for the likes of AJ Green and Julio Jones, because we could just get Sanzenbacher in the 2nd or 3rd round, I wish I was joking, I'm not)
As far as Saturdays, just picture a Steelers fan walking through the muni lot, just more violence and with more mind numbing stupidity (hard to imagine, I know). To tell you the truth the most classless OSU fans are usually the people that didn't even go to school there.
" To tell you the truth the most classless OSU fans are usually the people that didn't even go to school there"
I have found this to be the case as well. I have spent a lot of time with my wifes friends and their boyfriends/husbands from date parties to weddings and they have never been too overzealous. Its all in good fun.
But theres also the nuts that ran Herbstreit out of town. The ones who take OSU so seriously because Columbus doesnt have an NFL team, and the Browns and Bengals both suck out loud. Im guessing most of those mouth breathers did not graduate from OSU. If they did, well, that just confirms everyting we have all believed for years about the quality of an OSU education.
FWIW, that statement applies to any college fanbase in the country. Daywalkers are the worst of the worst, always. Just ask the entire state of Alabama.
all fan bases have them. It's proportion that is concerning when talking about OSU.
I'm born and raised in Columbus. Have lived here all my life. I like Columbus a lot with the exception of the buckeye Cult. Wear your Michigan gear proudly and laugh at the Columbus media when it comes to all things tosu. Which ever mgouser said to think like your a Stillerz fanin Cleveland is right. It's the same thing. As for the Michigan football games, they are almost always on TV. Whether it's BTN, ABC or ESPN. It's harder to find it on the radio though. The interweb works great for that.
Which part of town are moving too? Good luck and GO BLUE!!!
Im not sure I could do this, so you are right on the money there. We are moving to Gahanna, so I won't be right on top of campus.
Oddly enough, I am also a Browns fan. I've seen what happens to Steelers fans in the muni lot. Maybe I should buff up on my Rex Kwon Do
1) Join up with the Central Ohio Alumni club. They're a good group and usually do an activity once every two months or so. They're pretty good about getting together for game parties or group tickets to a UM v OSU bball or hockey game. I'm a member of the Dayton alumni association and between our two groups (separated by about an hour), there's something every month for UM fans.
2) Wings play in Columbus a lot.... get the Tim Hortons pack for the BJackets games. Upper bowl ticket, free coffee mug & hat with certificates for free coffee and donuts at Tim's the next day. I estimated about $15 of free stuff for a $25 ticket.
I think matt stout is still the coordinator. He does agood job, like I mentioned above, I get emails about gallo's every week and at least a hockey game every year.
I don't expect that this will cheer you much, but look at the population trajectories of NOW and LATER (for you):
So, you're moving to a "happening" city as far as trends are concerned. Smile!
A few years back I went there for grad school interviews and was pleasantly surprised. Of course, I'd expected Dresden, Germany after the fire bombing.
My cousin (a former resident) once described the town as a mediocre Big Ten university surrounded by a million hillbillies. Seems about right, but it could be worse (all hillbillies and no culture).
and Cleveland is in some dire straits right now. Plus, there is no lake effect snow in Columbus, which is pretty much the worst thing about living in Cleveland, so I got that going for me, which is nice
There are very few words or phrases that are appropriate in this situation, in fact, I can only muster 2 phrases that may help you.
1. There are other/plenty of fish in the sea.
- This is appropriate if you are moving there for either your wife or your job
2. Go Blue
Now I need to go get a tissue. Good luck
I'm Michigan through and through, but as far as the women go, you can do just fine in Columbus.
Having spent a fair amount of time in Ohio, I find that most OSU alums tend to be OK people. They bust your chops because they have to but the generally are OK to deal with. The same cannot be said for the blue collar wannabees around Columbus - they are scary. Read Brian's story of his trip to Columbus for a game a few years ago - great read and it will tell you what to expect.
These days, Tresselgate is a great equalizer.
Can somebody find that story for me? I've read it before and it's hilarious but I can't find it again...
I'm so, so sorry.
Been down here for about 4 years now, you'll be fine. Above all, fly your M flag on the house, wear your M cap out on the weekends, and speak proudly of the M teams and university. I've been surprised with how many fellow Alums will stop me in the grocery store or Lowes to say "Go Blue". They're around and have been too quiet lately. And, yes, join the alum club of Cental Ohio for events. We've done charity work, wine tastings, hockey games, and heard guest speakers (J. Bacon). The Wings come down several times a season and M comes down for hockey and bball.
The local buckeyes are a fun loving bunch who'll roast you if you get angry when they taunt you. Just give 'em a smile, maybe a few friendly words, and they'll slink away to the hole they came from. The bad ones have no connection to the university but most alums will be civil. I've been kicked, spit on, and berated (in front of my young kids). Always by some uneducated leach with the trademark buckstache, mullet, and pleather O State jacket. Welcome to Columbus.
Kirk Herbstreet's house?
a big suburb surrounding a second tier university, a bunch of government workers putting in their time, and a gaggle of insurance companies and what they bring to the table. the only reason it is growing in population as opposed to most midwestern cities is that it is essentially geographically coterminous with the metropolitan area. no pro football (except tosu), no major league baseball, no NBA, no cultural scene to speak of. have a blast. enjoy German Village, the cineplex and the Blue Jackets.
I live in Columbus, about 10 minutes east of downtown. You're going to run into some moron Fuckeye fans no matter how hard you try to avoid it, but it isn't THAT bad. I've only been here just over a year, but have enjoyed my time thus far.
There are bars all over, but during football season you're going to have a hard time finding one not overrun with anOSU fans. But most are friendly, especially if you go somewhere that serves some decent beer like Barley's...good beer attracts smart people and keeps those chugging Natty away. And you can always find the Michigan game somewhere.
Anyways, good luck.
I grew up a Michigan fan in Columbus (my Dad went to UM), and lived there for most of my life before starting my MBA at Ross about eighteen months ago. There are certainly some things you'll have to watch out for, but Columbus is actually a good city in many respects.
That is all. Go to church on Sunday's.
Hopefully you'll have a front row seat for the demise of Cheaty McCheater Vest and the accompanying sanctions. Schadenfreude is your friend.
Cheatie McSweater Vest is my new favorite name.
Sorry to hear about your recent misfortune.
Good luck with the move though, and congratulations on the kid-to-be!
Because I don't have one.
and everyone who has borrowed it/me over the years is repaying their debt this weekend
Well played. Make sure you pay them back with $20 of pizza and beer. That's what professional movers charge, right?
I feel sorry for your soul.
Long time lurker, first time poster. My BF and I have lived in C-bus (New Albany technically) for almost 9 years since we both graduated from UM. There are some advantages. First of all, it is great to be in AA when any UM team beats OSU...however it is WAY better to be here to watch the buckeye faithful mope and make excuses when anything doesn't go their way. Don't get me started on how great 2 back to back national title screw ups was to watch and then force them to talk about the next day. This tatoogate has been pretty awesome as well.
I have met some great friends here, but I am a girl and I can more easily avoid talking about sports. You will also quickly find and befriend the few obstinate folks that have been UM fans born/living in Columbus and refuse to give anyone the satisfaction of converting.
All in all it is a great place to live and raise a family. I also hear there will be a Wolverine tailgate near campus so there is always that for FB season, but I just cannot take those buckeye fans in person, so we mainly watch the games at our house. Go Blue!
This is your chance to run onto the OSU field naked wearing a batman cape with a big block M on the back of it.
Make us proud.
May God bless you and protect you.
For almost four years.
I agree with much of the advice listed above. I wear my Michigan gear everywhere...and usually, get a whisper complement. Almost got picked up by a hot chick because I wore Michigan gear when I first moved here...my wife was not pleased.
Do not, ever, turn on sports radio...you think Hineygate is bad? And you have to ignore most people during the fall, because all they talk about are the buckeyes.
The best though? To see a total city in depression when they lose. I have never seen that, even in cities that lose the Super Bowl. Here, it is like a wake when the Bucks lose.
The city is growing, unemployment is low, housing is cheap, the airport is accessible, the weather is much better than you expect.
And always remember...Michigan fans are here too.
The university purchased the holiday inn 2 years ago, they're turning it into dorms. It was never the same after they stopped closing down Lane on gamedays.
1) You will develop thick skin as you get told countless times that you will eventually become a tOSU fan
2) The alumni are reasonable folks that have the right to be passionate for their team. It is the undereducated proletareate that are hard to deal with.
3) This is the largest small minded college town in the county. Without an instate rival, the OSU fans never get a humility check. Until an Ohio MAC school surprises them, their arrogance will continue.
4) With proper training you can raise your children to be loyal Michigan fans
5) This mess with Tressel is fun to watch from the front row
step 1: soak the osu baby clothes in kerosene
step 2: use them to burn down the whole city
step 3: success
Repent, while there is still time... for our God is a compassionate one who does not wish this fate on any of his flock. Repent, son, and you shall be spared.
I live in Reynoldsburg just east of columbus, ptetty much every game is on cable. every now and then it wont be on but that hasn't happened recently that i can think of. if it's not on a big network then it'll be on bigten network. us M fans are scarce around here, but we are here.
It'll be OK. Sarcasm is your secret weapon in the big city. Luckily there have been plenty of Buckeye gaffes lately and the moral bedrock of the Tressel regime is badly cracked and the Buckeyes are vulnerable. Know your facts and don't be afraid of these swine. Oh, and there are a TON of Steelers fans in town. I guess unthinking loyalty to the State of Ohio doesn't extend to rooting for the pro football teams, such as they are.
As an M dad and long time fan, I'm always proudly sporting Michigan wear in Cbus, flying the flag in the front yard, etc. Lived here 19 years now - if we ever have to sell the house, may have to change out the "Michigan turns me on/OSU turns me off" light switches, though. Hopefully in 2012 things will get back to normal and the Pickerington schools will once again get to host the U of M Marching Band when they come down for The Game - it's a great time to be able to cheer on The Victors in a central Ohio gymnasium (that's a lot of sound for a small space!).
What I would really like, though, would be some Michigan radio stations to boost their power or get closer affiliates (than Toledo) so there'd be some different sports perspective to listen to in the car. There was one season (2002 I think) that one of the local stations, "The Zone" was broadcasting Michigan feeds as their "spy audio" but that's long ago.
My sister, a UM grad, lived in C'bus for several years. She lived in Powell and worked in Dublin. Both were very nice areas and close to the zoo, which was a big hit with our kids. A note about the zoo is that it's pretty nice and expanding, thanks to Jack Hanna, who is a c'bus guy. A lot of corporate headquarters there, including Nationwide Insurance and Limited. Wendy's HQ is still there, I believe, but they are now owned by a private equity firm based in Atlanta.
I've worked a bit with a client in Columbus and I do have to say that the Short North and German Village areas are pretty nice, especially if you're into good food. I was surprised at how many quality restaurants there were.
The one thing you do have to be aware of is that people in C'bus seem more enamored of their buckeyes than fans in other Big Ten cities. You'll see a ton of red just walking around the city - in restaurants, malls, stores, etc. It's actually kinda weird.
Haven't spent a ton of time on the osu campus, but the city proper and the suburbs are nice enough, as long as you don't gag at the site of red and block o's.
Born and raised in cow town. Was brainwashed as a young lad to pull for the communist regime. Broke away from their tyranny in 1985 and have been true BLUE ever since.
Now reside south of the city and have only the following advice to pass along:
Welcome to the area and GO BLUE!
Long time lurker, first time caller, as the talk radio parlance goes.
Like many here, I've also lived in Columbus for some time - it'll be 10! years this spring. I love Columbus as a place to live - all my friends are here and people are generally cool. (I am never going to say this out loud, of course) I just make it a point to not befriend the trailer trash, gap-toothed, cooler poopers who comprise the majority of Buckeye Nation. The actual OSU grads usually aren't too bad.
re: 97.1, I've been listening to that station a lot - mostly out of some masochistic streak, but there's been some great schadenfreude to be had by listening to the tools there bloviate about Tresselgate. Dimitrious Stanley is just awful to listen to. I can honestly say I'm stupider for having listened to him.
Never been to Gallo's - for peeps who are part of the UM Central Ohio alumni club, do you guys meet there for every game? I'm not a member, but I am an alum (class of 95) and Gallo's isn't far from where I live