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OT -- Idiot's Guide to Finding a Baseball Team to Root For

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:09 PM
#1
Moleskyn
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Joined: 06/28/2010
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OT -- Idiot's Guide to Finding a Baseball Team to Root For

With Spring Training in full swing, and the regular season in the on-deck circle I thought this handy-dandy flow chart would help any of those folks out there unsure as to who to root for once the season starts:

Baseball flow chart

http://www.interpretationbydesign.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/IBD_bas...

For the record, I will punch you in the face if you look at me funny.

Edit: Sorry for the size. For whatever reason, the image doesn't want to respond to the size limits I put on it.

Edit edit: See Misopogon's post if you didn't get to the link in time.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:19 PM
#2
DesHow21
DesHow21's picture
Joined: 07/29/2008
MGoPoints: 1552
It's rather simpler than this actually

Are you a shithead? 

 

If YES, root for the Yankees.

Else

Red Sox

 

No other team matters.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:28 PM
(Reply to #2) #3
MAgoBLUE
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Joined: 05/21/2010
MGoPoints: 2451
You are why everyone in the

You are why everyone in the country started hating the Sox as much as the Yankees.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:36 PM
(Reply to #6) #4
DesHow21
DesHow21's picture
Joined: 07/29/2008
MGoPoints: 1552
Fine

Be irrelevant. 

 

I am sure you are an avid WNBA watcher as well.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:54 PM
(Reply to #8) #5
kenfizzle
Joined: 07/11/2008
MGoPoints: 382
okay

Yea the Red Sox were really relevant last year. How was that playoff run by the way? With the second highest payroll in baseball? Sorry not all teams can buy championships.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 6:16 PM
(Reply to #8) #6
goblueclassof03
Joined: 03/12/2009
MGoPoints: 524
Be irrelevant?

The "irrelevant" Cardinals and A's have both won more World Series championships than the Red Sox, and without the inflated payrolls of the "relevant" teams.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 6:21 PM
(Reply to #8) #7
CleverMichiganR...
CleverMichiganReference's picture
Joined: 07/18/2008
MGoPoints: 4443
Pardon my French, but who the

Pardon my French, but who the fuck are you calling irrelevant, Mr. Demar-Dorsey-quote-in-his-signature? Every time you post it's like a dong punch all over again, and I believe it's been mentioned before. 

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March 3rd, 2011 at 6:23 PM
(Reply to #47) #8
Feat of Clay
Feat of Clay's picture
Joined: 08/10/2009
MGoPoints: 3698
BOYS!  Stop fighting and go

BOYS!  Stop fighting and go to your rooms!

I say let's get back to discussing this fairly hilarious flow chart.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 6:55 PM
(Reply to #48) #9
CleverMichiganR...
CleverMichiganReference's picture
Joined: 07/18/2008
MGoPoints: 4443
Splendid, I will keep

Splendid, I will keep fighting and remain in the playroom :] 

And I already distributed this to all my Yankee fan friends, who confirmed their soulless status. 

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March 3rd, 2011 at 9:54 PM
(Reply to #8) #10
WolvinLA2
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Joined: 11/13/2009
MGoPoints: 52761
I know this has been said,

I know this has been said, but Red Sox fans suck really harder.  Harder than almost any other pro sports fan I can think of off the top of my head. 

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:41 PM
(Reply to #23) #11
MaizeAndBlueWahoo
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Joined: 07/02/2008
MGoPoints: 32944
Bigger.  Red Sox fans =

Bigger.  Red Sox fans = Sparty fans.  Only two fanbases in the country like this.  Absurdly inflated sense of their team's place in history, incurably jealous of the powerhouse-slash-rival down the road, mind-blowingly arrogant over the slightest triumph over said rival, and identifying more with the hatred of their rival than the love of their own team.  The only two fanbases I can think of that do not mind their own misery in the slightest as long as they can bring their rival down with them.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:48 PM
(Reply to #29) #12
Moleskyn
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Joined: 06/28/2010
MGoPoints: 5343
Eh, I disagree. The BoSox

Eh, I disagree. The BoSox have won a championship in the last 40 years (I know I know I know, Sparty has good basketball... yet they claim they are a football school).

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:55 PM
(Reply to #31) #13
MaizeAndBlueWahoo
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MGoPoints: 32944
Well, you have to admit it'd

Well, you have to admit it'd be tough for the Red Sox to claim they're a football franchise.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:29 PM
(Reply to #33) #14
Moleskyn
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Joined: 06/28/2010
MGoPoints: 5343
Just like it'd be tough for

Just like it'd be tough for MSU to claim to be a football school. Hey-oh!

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:45 PM
(Reply to #29) #15
DesHow21
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Joined: 07/29/2008
MGoPoints: 1552
Bosox are 4th all time in

World Series won. They are 0.457 against the Yankees all time. Neither of these look like Sparty vs UM to me. 

 

 

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March 3rd, 2011 at 6:54 PM
(Reply to #42) #16
willywill9
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Joined: 09/22/2008
MGoPoints: 12910
so...

They lose more games than they win against the Yankees.

And they're one of baseballs oldest franchises, so the WS count is silly, if its even accurate. Their drought was so bad, people had to blame it on the concept of the curse of the bambino. Honestly the red sox are in the same boat as the Cubs, minus a couple of newfounded great years. Red sox fans have become the insecure version of yankees fans.

Signed,
A depressed Mets fan.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 6:56 PM
(Reply to #42) #17
MaizeAndBlueWahoo
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Joined: 07/02/2008
MGoPoints: 32944
It's not the

It's not the accomplishments.  It's the attitude.  I didn't say "Red Sox = Sparty."  I said, "Red Sox fans = Sparty fans."

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:55 PM
(Reply to #6) #18
we the roses
we the roses's picture
Joined: 07/20/2009
MGoPoints: 84
I believe that would be

I believe that would be because over the past few years Boston has spent just as much as the Yankees and really are finally competing with them in payroll

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:04 PM
(Reply to #6) #19
pdgoblue25
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Joined: 03/03/2010
MGoPoints: 10591
Sorry, No

I started hating the Sox more than the Yankees because even though you guys had a shitload of championships from the Celtics, Bruins and a super bowl from the Patriots before 2004 you still acted like the most tortured fans in the world because of the Sox and like we should all feel sorry for you.  That's why I started hating the Red Sox much much more than the Yankees. 

Not to mention the fact that you're all hypocrites.  The entire fan base did nothing but bitch and moan about the Yankees spending, and buying titles.  Then you won those 2 world series titles the exact same way, payroll.  Also a shitload of steroids that Ortiz and Ramirez were popping.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:33 PM
(Reply to #2) #20
Blue_Sox
Joined: 09/30/2010
MGoPoints: 4688
Yikes

I hope people around here know that I'm a White Sox fan so I'm not associated with this mentality. I definitely hate the Red Sox more than the Yankees at this point.

Edit: Now that I think about it...White Sox fan on a blog with mostly Tigers fans isn't much better. Oh, well.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:37 PM
(Reply to #7) #21
icefins26
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Joined: 02/01/2009
MGoPoints: 13019
You're not alone.  White Sox

You're not alone.  White Sox fan here, also.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:42 PM
(Reply to #11) #22
Moleskyn
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Joined: 06/28/2010
MGoPoints: 5343
So you guys prefer to just

So you guys prefer to just punch people in the neck, huh? Care to explain why?

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:47 PM
(Reply to #11) #23
those.who.stay.
those.who.stay.'s picture
Joined: 12/31/2008
MGoPoints: 3001
Go

Cubs

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:51 PM
(Reply to #13) #24
4godkingandwolv...
4godkingandwolverines's picture
Joined: 08/06/2008
MGoPoints: 15763
I'm...

... sorry. 

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:02 PM
(Reply to #13) #25
SteelCityMafia
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Joined: 03/16/2009
MGoPoints: 842
Go

Pirates!

 

Yeah, the eptiome of irrelevant.  I can't remember them having a winning season. :(

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:35 PM
(Reply to #21) #26
JeepinBen
JeepinBen's picture
Joined: 01/22/2010
MGoPoints: 25475
But

The pirates have a great job to do! As a cubs fan I really appreciate you being our AAA team the last few years

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March 4th, 2011 at 1:26 AM
(Reply to #13) #27
cm2010
Joined: 07/19/2010
MGoPoints: 547
Go Cards! Most successful

Go Cards! Most successful franchise not named the New York Yankees.

 

EDIT: Finally saw the flowchart, thank you for showing OP. Good stuff

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March 3rd, 2011 at 7:35 PM
(Reply to #2) #28
Michigan Arrogance
Michigan Arrogance's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 15317
let's get him

let's get him guys!
 

guys?

 

uhhh guys....

 

 

...

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:22 PM
#29
Maizerage05
Joined: 03/19/2010
MGoPoints: 31
Where

do I start??

/most confusing chart ever

Punch you in the face

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:25 PM
#30
Happy Gilmore
Happy Gilmore's picture
Joined: 01/13/2011
MGoPoints: 2649
"Look at me like that again

"Look at me like that again and I will punch you"..."in the face" = tiger's fan = awesome

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:28 PM
#31
MichLove
MichLove's picture
Joined: 08/31/2010
MGoPoints: 452
thank you

I loved this! I am a huge baseball fan (a yankees fan so I apparently don't have a soul). My favorite is I have been a lifelong fan since... 97 or 93 classic

plus one to you sir

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:36 PM
#32
profitgoblue
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Joined: 09/01/2009
MGoPoints: 19557
MGoBoard

I followed the chart and it says I should root for MGoBoard.  I'm okay with that.  Go 'Board!

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:36 PM
#33
Jasper
Jasper's picture
Joined: 12/30/2010
MGoPoints: 1955
some value added

I got some enjoyment out of reading that chart.  One thing I found annoying is that it reinforces the idea that coastal types have more "sophisticated" food preferences.  I realize that the author had to paint in broad strokes, but having to fight that stereotype ("You're from the Midwest? You must eat only meat, potatoes, and a few vegetables!") is sometimes a bother.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:53 PM
(Reply to #10) #34
bsand2053
bsand2053's picture
Joined: 04/14/2010
MGoPoints: 6704
If only eating meat,

If only eating meat, potatoes, and some vegatables are wrong, i don't want to be right.  

 

POT ROAST FTW!!!

 

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:32 PM
(Reply to #15) #35
TIMMMAAY
TIMMMAAY's picture
Joined: 09/08/2008
MGoPoints: 41347
">

HOMER Pictures, Images and Photos">

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March 3rd, 2011 at 6:26 PM
(Reply to #15) #36
Feat of Clay
Feat of Clay's picture
Joined: 08/10/2009
MGoPoints: 3698
I grew up loving the Royals

I grew up loving the Royals (I know, I  know) so here's my thermos full of gravy to pour over all.

 

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March 4th, 2011 at 12:56 AM
(Reply to #50) #37
BlueDragon
BlueDragon's picture
Joined: 11/14/2010
MGoPoints: 21718
If I were a KC fan

I would take along some biscuits with my gravy thermos.  Mmm-mmm.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:54 PM
#38
saveferris
saveferris's picture
Joined: 07/02/2009
MGoPoints: 15690
How can they leave out

How can they leave out "brazenly hitting off a bottle of scotch in front of a police officer" as part of the flow to being a Tigers fan?

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:56 PM
(Reply to #16) #39
kenfizzle
Joined: 07/11/2008
MGoPoints: 382
we both know

we both know Tigers fans aren't NEARLY classy enough to drink scotch. And yes, I am a Tigers fan.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:22 PM
(Reply to #19) #40
saveferris
saveferris's picture
Joined: 07/02/2009
MGoPoints: 15690
uhhh...

{sheepishly looks at shoes and kicks a nearby stone}....uh, yeah I guess you're right...

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:56 PM
#41
BrownJuggernaut
BrownJuggernaut's picture
Joined: 10/02/2010
MGoPoints: 7866
We sure love our "chowda"

We sure love our "chowda" over here in Boston.  And everyone talks like that too. Yep.

<slams head against keyboard>

Sox fan here. I understand why people hate the Sox. Some of these fans are really annoying. It was better before '04, believe me. We're pink hatted up and arrogant New Englanders suck. Also we refer to them as the "Sox," so apparently no other Sox exist (there isn't one right?). That in itself is pretty douchey. Whatever, it's in the water, it's in the blood.

The worst reason to hate the Sox is that they helped propogate the playing of "Sweet Caroline" a.k.a the ballad of child rape at sporting events. Why god? Why?

And now the ownership owns Liverpool. So that's a reason as well. 

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:24 PM
(Reply to #18) #42
mikoyan
mikoyan's picture
Joined: 09/06/2010
MGoPoints: 2784
I was actually rooting for

I was actually rooting for them to win the 2002 World Series Championship so that they would shut the hell up.  I got tired of hearing about the Billy Goat or Babe Ruth or Reggie Jackson or whatever the hell curse they had.  I mean geeze...HBO specials, movies, newspapers, even NPR.  Now that they've won the World Series twice in the past decade, they can go back to their little hole and die.  And if you want to talk about curses...those are lightweight curses....How many people have your curses killed?  Whatever is cursing the Lions has killed a coach, a couple players and seriously injured a couple more.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 9:29 PM
(Reply to #37) #43
BrownJuggernaut
BrownJuggernaut's picture
Joined: 10/02/2010
MGoPoints: 7866
The Curse of the Bambino was

The Curse of the Bambino was the creation of a writer who just wanted to sell some books. He's the Rick Reilly of Boston (Shaugnessy), he hasn't written anything good in years. The media played up this curse because we never fucking came through. It was really annoying to have that hanging over us, but I think it helped feed the negativity in the city. Now that we have won, I feel like things have changed (funny how sports can do that kind of thing right?). I miss the negativity because it fed the passion, the desire to rid of "the curse," even though I hate that term. 

The Lions have it rougher than rough. I really do sympathize with that fans (not so much the franchise). It's not like the Lions have ever teased you guys either. They've been bad. Lions fans have to love their team. It's when the team is bad that the real fans shine, at least in my book.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 3:57 PM
#44
MaizeNBlu628
MaizeNBlu628's picture
Joined: 08/21/2009
MGoPoints: 2543
link broken?

Anyone else having trouble opening the link? Page seems to be down for me, and I really need to find out who I should root for before end of business day!

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:25 PM
(Reply to #20) #45
dankbrogoblue
dankbrogoblue's picture
Joined: 11/12/2008
MGoPoints: 1075
I had the same problem...

So I googled "flowchart baseball team to root for" and got this. Don't know if it's the same one, but funny nonetheless.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:31 PM
(Reply to #25) #46
ken725
ken725's picture
Joined: 10/26/2008
MGoPoints: 27659
The link was broken for me as

The link was broken for me as well.

I tried following the flow chart to see what team I root for, then I realized that none of these things applied since I hate baseball. 

But, I guess Angels since they are my local team. 

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:38 PM
#47
All Aboard
All Aboard's picture
Joined: 01/03/2011
MGoPoints: 816
Go Tigers

but really, screw baseball. Booooring.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 8:12 PM
(Reply to #28) #48
david from wyoming
david from wyoming's picture
Joined: 03/15/2009
MGoPoints: 2981
Screw baseball you say? Screw

Screw baseball you say? Screw you, I say.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 4:54 PM
#49
soup-er-UM
soup-er-UM's picture
Joined: 01/08/2011
MGoPoints: 390
Just root for the Phillies and call it a day

4 Aces + Joe Blanton!

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March 3rd, 2011 at 7:21 PM
(Reply to #32) #50
Vasav
Vasav's picture
Joined: 12/13/2009
MGoPoints: 3715
As a Phils fan

I'm a little disappointed that we've become the Red Sox of the NL

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:02 PM
#51
buckeyejonross
buckeyejonross's picture
Joined: 07/27/2010
MGoPoints: 11395
Go Buccos.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:26 PM
#52
bklein09
bklein09's picture
Joined: 08/24/2009
MGoPoints: 7209
Go with the Cardinals. They

Go with the Cardinals.

They have the 2nd most World Series behind the Yankees but you'd never know it.

A relatively small market team that doesn't buy championships.

Not a lot of guys that shoot their mouths off. 

Plenty of grit (see Eckstein)

Great fans who really support players based on effort more than performance. 

When former players come back they almost always get an ovation. 

Whats not to like? 

(I know the Cards arent perfect and some people really have problems with Larussa, etc, but I'm from Saint Louis so sue me.)

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:45 PM
(Reply to #38) #53
dmblue
Joined: 03/12/2009
MGoPoints: 726
Aslo

They are awesome. 

Also, unlike most teams, the stadium is actually full even when they aren't doing that well.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 7:22 PM
(Reply to #38) #54
Vasav
Vasav's picture
Joined: 12/13/2009
MGoPoints: 3715
But they don't give foul balls to kids!

At least they think about it...

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March 3rd, 2011 at 5:53 PM
#55
stmccoy
stmccoy's picture
Joined: 10/07/2009
MGoPoints: 1828
I couldn't access the link

I couldn't access the link provided so I have no idea what it is refering to but following his subject line:  if you are an idiot and want to root for a baseball team...hop on board with the rest of us. 

 
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March 3rd, 2011 at 6:15 PM
#56
BlueDragon
BlueDragon's picture
Joined: 11/14/2010
MGoPoints: 21718
DON'T root for the Cleveland

DON'T root for the Cleveland Indians.  Seriously.  Makes the Browns look like the New England Patriots.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 6:26 PM
#57
Seth
Seth's picture
Joined: 10/14/2008
MGoPoints: 94436
Yeah I saw this on BYBs

Yeah I saw this on BYBs yesterday and started forwarding it around to friends.

One of their readers saved a copy before the website put a forbidden on it:

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March 3rd, 2011 at 7:19 PM
(Reply to #49) #58
LSAClassOf2000
LSAClassOf2000's picture
Joined: 01/07/2011
MGoPoints: 81354
Wow....

Did someone go all-out and doodle in Microsoft  Project? What in blazes does this mean anyway?

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March 3rd, 2011 at 7:38 PM
(Reply to #55) #59
Vasav
Vasav's picture
Joined: 12/13/2009
MGoPoints: 3715
What does this mean?

Stereotyping fanbases is fun and easy

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March 3rd, 2011 at 7:17 PM
#60
Vasav
Vasav's picture
Joined: 12/13/2009
MGoPoints: 3715
I'm a Phillies fan

I followed the chart, and found myself a Braves fan. I'm rethinking my political stance on human mascots because of this.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 11:41 PM
(Reply to #54) #61
BraveWolverine730
BraveWolverine730's picture
Joined: 09/21/2009
MGoPoints: 4122
I also followed the chart and

I also followed the chart and found myself a Braves fan. For obvious reasons I am not rethinking my political stance on human mascots.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 7:35 PM
#62
Michigan Arrogance
Michigan Arrogance's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 15317
that was a short read for me.

that was a short read for me.

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March 3rd, 2011 at 9:52 PM
#63
ixcuincle
ixcuincle's picture
Joined: 08/11/2010
MGoPoints: 4547
Saw that chart yesterday and

Saw that chart yesterday and posted it in the flowchart thread here. I love that flowchart stuff.

Too much Yankees hate too, Yankees rock. :)

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March 4th, 2011 at 1:07 AM
#64
FormerWolv
FormerWolv's picture
Joined: 08/30/2009
MGoPoints: 3377
(No subject)

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