The quintessential Sparty brah stereotype:
-- Got rejected from Michigan. Got into MSU.....and flunked out after three semesters. Graduated from Ferris instead. Still had time to participate in two couch burnings.
-- Considers himself an alum because of those three semesters. Insists State fans are better because they're all alums, not "Wal-Mart Wolverines" who didn't go to the school. Does not see the contradiction in the claim that most couch-burnings, riots, and graffiti damage in Ann Arbor (which is a whore, by the way) come from troublemakers "outside the community."
-- Has only two pieces of Sparty memorabilia on his '97 Grand Am: bumper stickers that say "U Call It Maize We Call It Corn" and "Have You Kicked A Wolverine Today?"
-- Favorite teams are "whoever is playing Meatchicken" and "Michigan State" in that order. Roots against Michigan even if MSU needs Michigan to win. Fall Saturdays are ruined when Michigan wins and State loses, tainted when Michigan wins and State wins, goes to the bar in a great mood when Michigan loses regardless of the fact that MSU just lost to Northwestern.
-- Knows exactly when MSU beats Michigan in hockey and makes sure you do, too. Didn't even know they were playing if Michigan won. Anyway let them have their hockey - Dantonio will let 'em know who's a real man in the fall.
-- Reminds you about Izzo when Michigan beats them in football. Reminds you about Dantonio when Michigan beats them in basketball. Reminds you about Wal-Mart Wolverines when Michigan wins in both. If he doesn't suddenly have the flu that day.