OT Favorite line from favorite Christmas movie

Submitted by HelloHeisman91 on

A Christmas Story

"Fragi`le, that must be Italian."

That is the best I could do to stress the gi.

M-Wolverine

December 22nd, 2009 at 2:12 PM ^

And that could qualify for another Christmas movie...Die Hard 2.

How about "I'm too old for this shit". Lethal Weapon another great Christmas movie...

Can't think of any classic lines from Gremlins... ;-)

Don

December 22nd, 2009 at 1:32 PM ^

Lloyd: "You know what I'm going to get you next Christmas, Mom? A big wooden cross, so that every time you feel unappreciated for your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it."

................

Gus: "I thought Mothers were sweet and nice a-a-and Patient. I know loan sharks who are more forgiving than you. Your husband ain't dead, lady. He's hiding."

jabberwock

December 22nd, 2009 at 1:43 PM ^

Murray: Gus?

Gus: What?

Murray: When are we gonna open presents?

Gus: Presents? Is that what you said? Presents? We'll open them when we get there. No, in fact, I'll save you the trouble. Your present is a giant fucking canon. And you're gonna crawl in it. Then I'm gonna get 2 pounds of gunpowder and I'm gonna shoot you right out of Jersey! And then I'm gonna drive to Jersey, and pick up all the parts of your body and put them in a plastic bag. Then I'm gonna drive to my house with you in the bag and toss you into the fireplace. I'm gonna get my glass of whiskey and watch the Charlie Brown special with your ashes burning IN MY FUCKING HOUSE! AGH!

Murray: Gus?

Gus: What?

Murray: What's that smell?

Gus: Shut up.

Faded Glory

December 22nd, 2009 at 1:46 PM ^

Clark: Oh, I was just smelling - smiling. I was just blouse - browsing. I, uh, heh heh. Well, I guess it just wouldn't... Oh hee hee, it wouldn't be the Christmas shopping season if the stores were any less hooter than they - HOTTER than they are. Whew. It is warm in here, isn't it?

Mary: You have your coat on.

Clark: Yes, oh do I? Yeah, it is a bit nipply out. I mean nippy. What am I saying, nipple?

ChalmersE

December 22nd, 2009 at 1:59 PM ^

That's the version where Natalie Wood plays the little girl. Anyway, the line/situation I love is when the US mail delivers all the Santa Claus mail to the courthouse and the Judge says something like, "If the United States government deems this individual to be Santa Claus that's good enough for me. Case dismissed."

Crime Reporter

December 22nd, 2009 at 3:09 PM ^

Eddie has some of the best lines in the movie.

A couple favorites:

"Remember that metal plate in my head? Well I had to get it replaced because every time Katherine revved up the microwave I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for a half-hour."

"Art, you want to load me up with more there, it is Goood!"

"You ready to do some kissing?"

"That there is an RV."

Feat of Clay

December 22nd, 2009 at 2:10 PM ^

I've got about 45 "favorites" from Christmas Vacation, but one we repeat a lot (when discussing presents) is Eddie's intonation in Wal-Mart when he tells Clark to pick himself out something "real nice" with a wink.

Sometimes I'll add a finger gun and a mouth click, because hey.

Crime Reporter

December 22nd, 2009 at 2:46 PM ^

Another Griswold classic in the mall talking to Mary:

"Which is to say Christmas as in yule, yule log. Not a log. I don't have a log. Not in the sense that you thought I said.

mgoblue15

December 22nd, 2009 at 2:59 PM ^

Oh, the silent majesty of a winter's morn... the clean, cool chill of
the holiday air... an bottomhole in his bathrobe, emptying a chemical
toilet into my sewer...

outwest

December 23rd, 2009 at 11:04 AM ^

Eddie: If you scratch his belly, Clark, he will love you till the day you die.
Clark: I really shouldn't, Eddie. My hands are all chapped.
****
Clark: [a squirrel is loose in the house] Where is Eddie? He usually eats these goddam things.
Cousin Catherine Johnson: Not recently, Clark. He read that squirrels were high in cholesterol.
****
Eddie: I don't know if I oughta go sailin' down no hill with nothin' between the ground and my brains but a piece of government plastic.
Clark: Do you really think it matters, Eddie?
****
[after Clark fails at lighting all the exterior Christmas lights at the "lighting ceremony" in front of the entire family]
Frances: Talk about pissing your money away. I hope you kids see what a silly waste of resources this was.
Audrey: He worked really hard, Grandma.
Art: So do washing machines.

Crime Reporter

December 22nd, 2009 at 3:02 PM ^

When Clark's boss asks about mentioning his crunch enhancer at a trade show:

"Don't forget that report, Bill."

Clark: Yes, sir. Merry Christmas. (then line of kiss asses follow boss, Clark addresses each as they pass).

Clark: "Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Kiss my ass. Kiss his ass. Kiss your ass. Happy Hanukkah."

Greg McMurtry

December 22nd, 2009 at 3:53 PM ^

One of my favorite scenes from "Christmas Vacation" is when Clark & Ellen are in bed and Clark still has sap all over his hands from the tree and he ends up with magazine pages, Ellen's hair and the lamp stuck to his fingers.

ldoublee

December 22nd, 2009 at 4:00 PM ^

is required viewing around Christmas. It's still as funny today as it was 20 years ago. It's stood the test of time unlike many other movies.

Cousin Eddie is one of my favorite all time movie characters. Right up there with El Guapo and Rambo.

Louie C

December 22nd, 2009 at 11:48 PM ^

SONS OF B*TCHES!! BUMPUSSES!!!!

I also like this one from Christmas Vacation:

Clark W. Griswold: "It's a one year membership in the Jelly of the Month Club."

Cousin Eddie: "Clark, that's the gift that keeps on giving the whole year."