Blow them all up before they hurt someone.
no wonder we hired Hunter Lochmann
Blow them all up before they hurt someone.
Or make my kid cry. EEEWWWW those things are creepy.
Relevant story : When my younger brother was very little, he mistakenly sang The Victors as "Hail to the victors valiant, hail to the concrete heroes ..." (which is kind of awesome actually)
And when I was very little, I drew a picture (one of many fan art projects in my early years) of Michigan Stadium with a scoreboard showing our domination of Ohio ... Except I wrote "UFM" to represent the good guys because that's what I had always heard when people said "U of M."
So yeah, I guess my point is, I can understand this.
When I was little, I thought that line was "Hail! to the country's heroes..."
I also thought it was "UFM" for awhile.
Much like your younger brother, I used to sing "The Victors" as "hail to the concrete heroes". It took forever for my parents to correct me.
Wife in South Bend still says "concrete heroes." She knows the real words, but she likes it better her way.
I'm actually really happy & surprised that so many other people got this mixed up! Turns out, ALL little kids are dumb. Yayyy!
Teaching about the Louisiana Purchase one day and I was using a PowerPoint with pictures and such. So I have a for sale sign up and it says "call Napolean @ 423-buy-land". A girl raises her hand and asks in complete sincerity, "coach why does Napolean use our local number?" Blew that lesson up.
I had one similar...
Teaching a lesson on Colonial tensions prior to the Revolutionary War, one of my students asked, "where was the Boston Tea Party?"
Can you tell me who's buried in Grant's Tomb and what color is George Washington's White Horse?
On a serious note, I wish people would realize that not knowing history can really screw up the future, just sayin'.
You shouldn't have tried to trick them by misspelling Napoleon's name.
Outrageous! Do kids these days not play Minesweeper anymore?
Minesweeper has been replaced by something called Angry Birds
"What is an angry bird?! I'm tired of pretending I know."
This was my mother in law's question to my wife yesterday. I bet all the kids that ask these funny questions could have told her.
make you a mime.
No Walking Dead thread today? I see that it is going head-to-head with Zombieland.
I just spent ten minutes looking at that website. There are some hilarious student responses there. Some are obviously bored students who know the material, some are just begging for mercy and a passing grade, but some just defy categorization.
My favorite was the Oedipus essay. But Peter Nguyen is pretty creative himself.
I had a history/econ teacher in high school that student taught at some summer school for troubled students or something like that. He asked the students for an essay on George S. Patton, and one of his students writes:
George S. Patton: He kicked ass and took names.
Apparently my teacher gave him a D- because he thought it was hilarious. I'd tend to agree with that.
"... taught at some summer school for troubled students or something like that"
Was it the Center For Children Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too?
He had a problem with payment, though, Derk Zoolander would only pay in really big checks, a la Happy Gilmore.
I don't know what it was, but it was some situation with...let's just say, students who were less than ideal academically.
lol this site is awesome. I would have given that Madison picture maximum points.
A teacher at the school I teach at had a student ask her, in her 2nd period biology course, "Do Asian people get pregnant? Because I have never seen a pregnant asian woman"
And in one of my high school science classes there was a girl who, on separate occasions, asked if Long Island would float away without bridges connecting it (if only, right?) and if elephants were actually "extincted."
sooo... which one is it?
you just gotta anunciate...bro
A kid asked me once, "Do white people ever get cold? I saw this white bum outside once and he wasn't wearing a coat."
I can't remember what I said in response.
As for when I was little, I once thought the Dukes of Hazzard's car was called the "Generally," which never made sense...
Our high school Michigan history class (back in the Stone Age) used a text that had some political and historical shortcomings, including the "fact" that Indians were cannibals and liked to feast on missionaries. The teacher, reading from the book, said the Indians "ate them with relish." One of my classmates said, "With RELISH? I didn't know they HAD relish back then."
My classmate got over it. She went on to become a very good junior high teacher. Karma being what it is, I can only imagine the kind of questions her students asked her.
(was the 5 nations until the Tuscarora joined), "Mohawk" means man-eater in Algonquin. Could be name-calling by an enemy but both the Jesuit missionaries and English explorers report ritual cannibalism, such as the victorious chief eating the hand of the vanquished chief to take his power. I loved the history of the Great Lakes region as a kid and read a lot of books, including Alexander Henry's account. No mention of condiments.
There were apparently some tribes that practiced (is that the right word? Sounds too pleasant) cannibalism, though the large majority did not.
The Aztecs were notorious for ritual cannibalism (warriors would eat a strip of flesh from enemies they had slain in combat). Some people dispute this, but the Aztecs' own written and oral histories seem to support it as the truth. The Karankawa tribe of southeast Texas was also said to practice ritual cannibalism on defeated enemies. There were a few Amazonian tribes who practiced funerary cannibalism (family and friends would eat part of a dead tribal member's body as a religious ceremony at the funeral). Finally, the Carib people of South America were said to kill and eat prisoners of war, though it's been pointed out that the Spaniards who made this claim were lining their own pockets by doing so (Queen Isabella had forbidden her subjects from selling Africans, or Indians, as slaves unless they were cannibals).
I once had a student in one of the college classes I teach ask the following question when he was confused by an exam question: "So, by 19th century, what do you mean?"
Not a question, but the dumbest thing I've ever had a student say happened earlier this year in another college class I teach: "Actually, Seattle is still the smallest state." Upon reflection, he clarified that he meant Oregon.
than "land mimes".....
Not really a question, but hilarious nonetheless...
What the textbook said:
"...two organisms come together to create offspring."
What the student read:
"...two orgasms come together to create offspring."
I didn't correct her, because technically, she's right.
I have no stories.
I smell sexy
...because the presence of mimes, increases thoughts of suicide.
In high school (8-10 years ago) one of my classmates asked if Caesar was still alive.
Best one I ever heard came from my wife. She was in a freshman history class. The professor talks about Japan being at war with China when it launched the attack on Pearl Harbor. One of the brilliant young women in her class asked the professor how Japan could bomb Pearl Harbor when they were already at war with China. Without missing a beat, his response: "They took two planes."
I see nothing wrong with that question, at the time no one thought Japan could with their resources so streched. It deserved a better answer.
In high school French class, our teacher asked us to same ingredients one would put in a cake. Other students chipped in with the obvious ones like butter and flour, etc. I didn't know many other applicable words, so I chimed in with 'preservatif', thinking that store bought cakes use preservatives to keep them fresh.
'Preservatif' is the French word for condom
I think she was just messing with you.
"Did I miss anything?"
No kId I deliberately planned to waste everyone's time
we were talking about the american west, specifically farming in the mid 1800's. we had already covered sod houses, and how they used sod because there aren't any trees (wood) on the plains..
me: and what was the material they used to make houses?
me: remember? they don't have trees so they can't use wood, so they used.....
me: starts with an 'S'.....
girl: oh! yeah! SAND
there're no stupid questions, just stupid answers. and stupid people who don't ask questions.
a colleague of mine, Stan, was working with his homeroom class on something or other, and a young lady, looking at her school-provided planner, raised her hand and asked, "Is Christmas on the 30th or the 31st this year?"
Stan is one of the biggest smart-asses I know, and he'd been teaching 40 years; even he was left speechless.
I like the questions from cruise ship passengers.
1. Do the elevators go to the front of the ship?
2. Does the crew sleep on the ship?