OT: Bud Selig and Alyssa Milano (satire via Twitter).

Submitted by Firstbase on

Electing not to overturn the botched call by major league umpire Jim Joyce that cost Detroit Tiger pitcher Armando Galarraga a perfect game, baseball commissioner Bud Selig admitted scouring Twitter afterward in search of support.

"It wasn't until I read the post by respected baseball expert and part-time actress Alyssa Milano that I truly felt at peace with my decision," stated Selig. "When I read her Twitter post, my sphincter quivered and I'm not to proud to admit that I soiled myself. I mean, she's like, so hot."

Milano recently twitted, "Personally, I agree with Selig on this one. Part of the game (as it is played now) is human error."

There is no confirmation that the two are secretly dating.

Njia

June 4th, 2010 at 7:46 AM ^

Damn you. Now, I'll have to take up hallucinogenic mushrooms to get that out of my mind, and pray to God that the 'shrooms don't cause me to get chased by Selig's sphincter.

Njia

June 4th, 2010 at 3:11 PM ^

Nazis were also prudes. That seems to be the basic problem with maintaining totalitarianism. If dictators would allow their people to watch porn and wank all day long, they could probably get away with whatever they wanted. Sure, the trains wouldn't run on time, but those people would be happy.