March Madness & Vasectomy - I may owe someone an apology...

Submitted by jtmc33 on

Last week, I was talking to a woman who has three kids (all boys).  When I asked if they were going to try for a boy, she said that her husband was getting a vasectomy next Wednesday (as in the day before March Madness).

I then told her that there are more vasectomies scheduled in that week than any other.  She looked at me with a blank stare and asked why....   So, I said, "It's the opening weekend of March Madness... you get to lay on the couch for 4 days and watch basketball"

She stearnly told me, with no hersitation, "My husband isn't into sports."

My responsse..."Well, he obviously is.  And I just ruined this poor guy's master plan."

She laughed, but in a "I'm going to f'ing kill him" sort of way.

So, if you are married to a 35 year old, attractive Emergency Room Doctor, who is ruining your "down time" as you try to watch BBall with a bag of frozen peas on your crotch... I'm Sorry

So, who has their own Vasectomy and March Madness story... let's hear them

UM in VA

March 21st, 2014 at 10:30 AM ^

I had mine the day before the US Open (Golf) in June a couple years ago.  I live in Virginia, so we are prone to summer thunderstorms.  That Wednesday night, 8 hours after I had the procedure done, a storm rolled through and knocked out our power for the next 2 days.

So instead of watching golf, I got to sit in 100 degree heat with no A/C and had to pull-start a generator several times.

Mr. Elbel

March 21st, 2014 at 1:52 PM ^

Was that with the derecho back in 2012 that knocked out everyone's power? I believe that was right around the time of the U.S. Open (they both were in June, if I remember correctly). I live in Lynchburg, and while we had power, everyone else was out for at least a week. Being out for just 2 days from that storm would have actually been pretty lucky.

UMfan21

March 21st, 2014 at 10:35 AM ^

"So, who has their own Vasectomy and March Madness story... let's hear them"



Things I never expected/wanted to hear about on mgoblog.

Waters Demos

March 21st, 2014 at 10:45 AM ^

I don't know.  This guy's comment could be borne of 3 possible human reactions: 

  1. Desire for quick/cheap laugh;
  2. (Likely in conjunction with [1]) Naivete, lack of experience/relation;
  3. Experience and disinclination to revisit.

If it is (3), then UMfan21 can prove himself by contributing his own story to this fine thread.  If not, then I suppose we've diagnosed the real, less compelling motivation here.   

wish you were here

March 21st, 2014 at 10:45 AM ^

The laser broke in the middle of my procedure. He had to pull the cords and cut by hand. My wife (RN) almost passed out. My left nut, without laser, swelled up for two weeks. I still have two cups to fill and am looking for someone with soft hands.

Mabel Pines

March 21st, 2014 at 11:46 AM ^

I pushed 3 eight pound babies out of my vagina (not all at once) with no drugs. 

 

re: Vasectomy scheduling:  my hubby had his Wednesday of Masters week, so you could do that as well.  I brought him pizza and beer in bed while he immersed himself in golf.

LSAClassOf2000

March 21st, 2014 at 10:46 AM ^

See, when I underwent this particular procedure in late June several years ago, I really didn't even think of the possibility of postponing it until March Madness of the following year (that would have been 2009 in my case). This is a brilliant plan (and it would be paid time off from a bank that is not vacation), in my estimation, and my wife, while not into sports either, at least tolerates my obsessions. Damnit. 

cajunhawk

March 21st, 2014 at 11:07 AM ^

Second child is due in July. Once we know it's a functional human being...I will look up the NCAA Tournament schedule for 2015...and schedule my vasectomy. I have heard it's not that bad...just feels like you have been kicked in the balls for two days. With the right meds and booze...that could be a pretty good two days.

Gameboy

March 21st, 2014 at 11:12 AM ^

Not vasectomy, but my daughter is a Pi Day baby born 12 years ago.

I will never forget that she was born on a Thursday as while my wife lay there sleeping on the hospital bed waiting for my daughter to come out, I was sitting there all day watching the first day of March Madness action.

It really could not have been timed any better.

Louie C

March 21st, 2014 at 11:49 AM ^

My wife went into labor into labor on the day the Sweet 16 began in '05. I'll never forget the matchup, Louisville vs Washington. I remember it like it was yesterday, rocking and feeding him while watching that game and thinking "Wow, I'm a dad now!"

My daughter was born just as Michigan's dismantling of #2 ND was beginning in '06. Good timing both times.

Snow Sucks

March 21st, 2014 at 11:12 AM ^

I don't have kids, but likely will have one next year. After that, I will seriously think about a vasectomy. I don't want any kids in the first place, but it's either have one or lose everything. I will not agree to more than one child and that's the bottom line.

DrueDown

March 21st, 2014 at 11:25 AM ^

I didn't even think about MM when I scheduled it last month.

 

What a Happy Bonus! Percocet+ non-stop MBB!

 

Downside, I have a frozen bag of peas on my junk.

StephenRKass

March 21st, 2014 at 11:25 AM ^

My story:  I have a friend who has a beautiful 2 year old boy, third child, well after his vasectomy. Point of the story is that this surgery is not foolproof. Read up in Wikipedia or Google it for more info.

jtmc33

March 21st, 2014 at 11:32 AM ^

My vasectomy doctor told me that the insurance settlement rate for a failed procedure was $300,000  (i.e. - the cost of raising a child to age 18, projected out to the 2020's). 

Of course, this settlement offer is only good after the baby's DNA matches yours..........

Njia

March 21st, 2014 at 1:00 PM ^

When I was in middle school, a (girl) classmate of mine showed me a joke (back when such things were passed around on paper instead of social media). It had a girl and a boy trying to "one-up" each other. Finally, the boy dropped his pants and said "I've got one of these and you don't."

To which, the girl lifted her skirt to expose her equipment and said: "I've one of THESE, which means I can get as many of THOSE as I want!"