Hey guys, remember when Luke Fickle jizzed his pants at a press conference.
Hoke Hatred From Behind Enemy Lines
that is something coming from a fanbase that claims Casey Anthony as one of their own. Fear? Jealousy? Doesn't matter, I'm just glad their riled up.
There's no reason to bring Boobs into the discussion. Er, I mean Casey Anthony.
Everything about Ohio States sucks, of course, but the description of Hoke as "a pompous toad who squats upon the lilypad of elitism" was actually pretty funny.
I'm pretty sure someone already made that joke about charlie weis.
I read that article last week and - while he was trying to be insulting - it actually made me happy to read it. Because, if tsio fans could feel that much negative emotion about Brady, he must be doing something right!
we all should aspire to have tsio blogs write poetry about us like this!
besides, I'd rather have a husky head coach than one who looks like a love child between beavis and butthead...
Is husky for men the same as pleasently plump for women?
I hope so....
Typical Buckeye extremist. It is these jerks that makes them suck big time.
Love these jokes and insults. You can tell they are scared about the next few seasons. I could give a rat's ass about their current coach, good luck to him.
"Pompous" and "elitism" seem like strange descriptors for a guy like Hoke. Carr, maybe.
Lloyd Carr is a former high school English/history teacher who required his college football players to look up words in the dictionary before they met him. I don't think he fits the stereotypical Riverview mold.
I've been working Downriver for 3 months. I want to put a bullet through my brain. It's like Michigan's version of the Deep South. The only semblance of civilization is Grosse Ile.
Absolutely, Grosse Ile resident right here. The surrounding areas really kind of suck.
This is why I never want to be scolded by another board member that 'Enemy or not, Eleven Warriors is a pretty good blog.' Exhibit A:
Huge like the belt he has to wear to keep his parachute-sized pants in place around his planetoid sized waist. Because he's fat. Fat fat fatty fat fat.
He who is without sin cast the first stone.....
That comment was made toungue-in-cheek. The writer was saying that Hoke is good for the rivarly because he makes the writer want to hurl petty insults.
Finally, all of Hoke's talk and bluster has turned myself and many of my fellow OSU fans into sad little people who prepare pathetic and immature jokes to offset any potential success that his team might have on the field, a sacred rite of passage not practiced in OSU fandom for far too long now. And for that, Brady Hoke should be congratulated. He hasn't even coached one game, and already he has made huge contributions to the Ohio State/Michigan rivalry.
I appreciated the tone of this article.
I'll take a finger pointing, jolly, portly, gold pooping recruiting master over an Affliction T-Shirt wearing douche-nozzle any day of the week.
"meh,, muh mah muh, he's fat, muh, meh, michigan arrogance, mah, muh, mneh, tressel hero, meh"
SHUT THE FUCK UP
WE ALL GET FAT.
WE ALL DIE.
NOT ALL OF US CHEAT.
f em They will still..always.. be buckeyes. its a pity.
I have to say, this is just perfect.
It's not a pissing contest, it's early August and I, for one, am starved for content about all things Michigan. If someone from a decently respected rival blog wants to talk shit about the Head Coach of Michigan Football, I'd like to read it. And guess what, anything that anyone working for a website has ever written on the internet, ever, is for page hits. Oh no! A rival's website might get a few extra page views! It's not like we've ever had content that linked to and argued with them before, right?
Beavis, I think you and I should join forces. It appears we both thoroughly enjoy arguing for arguing's sake; it truly is one of my hobbies. I was going to continue arguing with you, but was very much disarmed by The Office reference. Well done. I say the next time someone says something disagreeable, we'll both go after them with fervor.
And yes, my dentist's name is Crentist. I know Crentist rhymes with dentist, maybe that's why he decided to become one.
If it weren't for bloggers looking for page hits, you'd have 5,744 less mgopoints and apparently a lot more time on your hands. It's a pretty clever, well written, and relevant link from a respectable rival blog...get over it.
"His very existence has made me into a worse person, more vengeful and petty than ever before."
An impressive feat, no doubt. I will never understand Ohio State fans. I feel like this is what would have gone down, even if Hoke had given a Bill Stewart-esque "aw shucks guys" opinion on Michigan:
Hoke: "I like Michigan football. I think it is pretty neat, even though I am from Ohio."
OSU fan: "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The fact that these fanbases are getting frazzled means that whatever Hoke is doing is working.
There were rival fans (not the obnoxious ones that liked to gloat) that simply felt sorry for us during the RR era. These are the ones that are getting cranky in re: to Hoke.
It's worth noting that there was a significant contingent of OSU and Big Ten folks in general who thought RR was going to be wildly successful in the conference and then started referring to him as "Dick Rod" and ranting about how he's such a terrible person for the way he left WVU.
I think the real difference between Hoke and RR is that Hoke is talking more publicly about Ohio and is doing some chest thumping on Michigan's behalf, which RR obviously did not do.
Our plan is working. It's not really being an elitist if we are in fact much better people. Keep it up, Coach Hoke.
not exactly surprised at it. I rather expected some of it: namely them claiming he's arrogant and pompous because he's from Ohio, but likes Michigan... mostly because they say that about everyone who happens to be from Ohio and isn't absolutely obsessed with OSU.
It's especially not surprising when you consider that this is the same fanbase that has been wishing ACL tears and placing voodoo hexes on Tom Stroble and Kyle Kalis.
Not really anything to back any of his statements up, he just believes Hoke is pompous because he has the audacity to want a Big Ten Title while not bleeding scarlet and gray... honestly that is probably one of the most hypocritical arguments I've ever heard. "You're arrogant because you said you're going to compete for the Big Ten Championship... only we get to do that!"
I wouldn't pay it much heed though, because at the end of the day they have nothing on Hoke. Calling him pompous is pretty baseless and hypocritical, calling him out because he is 48-51 as a head coach shows a lack of research as it doesn't take a genius to see that he led two dramatic turnarounds of two abysmal programs to get to 48-51. Which really only leaves them with fat jokes, which are a sign of desperation.
If they weren't scared of us, they really wouldn't care. The fact that they are infuriated is even better because they realize that we are on the way up and they are on the way down. None of them would be saying anything if we weren't beating them in recruiting or if the Tressel thing never had any substance, they would simply brush it off.
That being said, I can't wait to see how they react after a few years of us pounding their sorry asses into the ground and simply start to take our pick of recruits in Ohio, rather than having to "steal" them away. Great to be a wolverine!
Valenti will be having a discussion today on how deeply Brady Hoke is in the heads of OSU fans.
I thought that was hilarious. It was so outrageous that there is no way it was intended to be taken seriously, and I laughed my ass off.
I've been so in love with Hoke and everything he's said/done that I haven't even thought about how opposing fans must view him. This tool's a buckeye, so he's going to go out of his way to convey his hatred, but I'd be interested to see how other fans of college football view him.
I just see him as a big, lovable guy who knows what's important (the excellence and integrity of his university, his team, his players, and the fans) and what's not (combing his hair).
Hey, they don't say mean things about people unless they are doing something right.
I read this on their blog few days ago, and I have to say I'm quite proud that Mgoblog doesn't resort to cheap shots and fat jokes all the time. If that's arrogance, so be it.
The Charlie Weis Thanksgiving Special would like a word with you. Damn that song is catchy!
But Weis is the obvious exception though. Anyone who claims they have a "decided schematic advantage" deserves everything thrown at them.
and you can't see that our Coach claiming we're better than you because of our zip code may instill the same kind of irritation in our rivals???
One question mark is sufficient, JimBob. Second, there are a number of reasons we're better than our rivals in addition to our zip code.
Sounds like Hoke's arrogance is right up your alley.
And sarcasm is hard to convey over the internet
A coach coming in and talking up his school - common. A new coach extolling his own superiority over other coaches - I can only think of one.
That, and he was so large that his knees gave up on him. Brady Hoke is not obese like everybody makes him seem, he's big, but he isn't fat. Charlie Weis, Terrance Cody, and Rosie O'Donnell are fat.
Soon enough Hoke's weight will be the only thing they shall be able to joke about...
"His very existence has made me into a worse person."
Doubt it. When you bottom out, it's tough to go any lower.
....Michigan returns to the apex of the football world...the hate/hype machine isn't even registering yet.
This is only the shape of things to come...regarding the resurgent of MICHIGAN!
We own Ohio
keep it up!
If you people are seriously suggesting that no one on this blog ever took a fat joke shot at Charlie Weis, you need to take a step away from the computer.
Charlie Weis has front-butt for Christ's sake!
because Charlie Weiss is really fat
This is good news. I hope that whoever Ohio chooses for a coach will invoke similar emotions with Michigan fans.
Preeeetty sure we made fun of Weis being fat for like half a decade...
You've said some dumb crap but I am 100% in agreement here.
But there's a difference between pudgy and Maury Povich Special...
Is there? Is there REALLY?
If you look like a normal sized human (like I do) those two are the same.
P.S. Hoke is probably pushing 3 bills. That ain't "pudgy."
Hoke's fat for sure but Weis is (maybe was? I seem to remember reading about him going under the knife) very obese. Hoke and Weis aren't the same.
You beat me to it.
Tons of Weis fat jokes were found here. Still are, occasionally.
Also, iirc, Fulmer got much of the same on this board.
What goes around, comes around. We're in a big glass house, so to speak. Pot, meet kettle.
Regarding the "eleven warriors" piece, I smiled. It is nice they are worried, and taking Michigan seriously again. I was offered a free ticket to the game in Columbus last year, and turned it down. The reality was, I didn't think we'd win. I'd rather have a chance to compete, win or lose, then to have the rivalry become too lopsided. Also nice to get under their skin. I have a bunch of Ohio in-laws and relations. They hardly bothered with any jibes the last few years. Michigan was becoming irrelevant, not a good thing.
What is this Ohio you speak of?
I read 11W nearly every day just to see what the enemy is thinking. I saw this but I didn't feel like it merited a reaction. The vitriol and delusion there is remarkable. I once went to an OSU game with my little brother, who chose OSU over UM for his masters due to the fact that they paid him to attend and he didn't want and inbred MFA. I did not wear Maize and Blue due to my brothers warnings and it wasn't for The Game. That said, I have never seen people act with more disrespect for an opposing teams fans than I did in Columbus. And yes I have been to Fenway and Veterans stadium and they had nothing on the Shoe.
I've just come to accept that being classless is the hallmark of an OSU fan (when in Columbus). They seem to understand that they can't act like that outside of Ohio. If you want to see one explode bring up Tat-gate.
Edit: I'm told Cameron can be this way from my TarHeel friends, but I'm not going to test it.
Seems like Brady is really under their skin. Tremendous!
He's in their state. Stealin their doodz.
Is it just my homer eyes, cause I don't see Hoke as fat?? I never have. Hes a big dude, but thats kind of it, hes a big dude. Hes big like a lineman, husky thick stocky whatever you want to call it. He's a bit older, so no doubt is actually is a bit fat, and not as solid as he used to be.. but seriously, he's a fuckin football coach. This is what football coaches used to look like, cause THEY played the damn game. I bet its part of why he does so great recruiting lineman, they relate to him. They see him as one of their own. He's not some sissy imitation senator, librarian wanna be.
you must be referring to the national title winning, Michigan-butt kicking, monster-class recruiting college football coach who just resigned, right?
I think you forgot lying, cheating, hypocritical, and two-faced, just to name a few.
that tressel was fired. A month later he "resigned" ... because that's just the way buckeyes do things ..... (duck and cover (up).
Well admittedly, tressel was what i was picturing when i was ending my rant. though any clean cut rectangles glasses sweater vest wearing small frail football head coach fits too
If you think Hoke isn't fat then this country has more of a problem than just being fat as fuck. We have actually warped our image of what a human should look like. Hoke is fat, dude. And not kind of fat. He is really fat. Relative to what a human being is supposed to look like, of course.
About being ugly on the inside as you are about bring fat on the outside. Give me a fat nice guy over a thin ass hole any day.
There, do we feel better?
I find that people who punctuate every point with insults like "pussies" and "DUMB" and "sub-mental" are usually compensating for their own inadequacies.
I prefer my assholes thin........
Were you equally disturbed at the sight of some of the members of the previous staff? RR's assistants included a few heavyweights.
Haha I laughed at this...touché.
people who are the size of what you think a human being should look like...don't play college football. Your talking about a guy who played college ball on the line..what do you expect? It's not the same as Weiss's pear shaped 350 lb ass thats never ran a hill in his life. Sure Hoke is fat, so is Ryan Van Bergan,Will Campbell,Richard Ash, Barnum,Huyge,Tallbott,Washinton,Molk...you get the point. Heck, im 205 lbs, 7% body fat and according to my Dr's chart..im obese. IMO fuck what a human being is supposed to look like.
Obviously BMI is outdated and if you look at it you must enter the 21st centruy, but a human being is not supposed to be 300 pounds. Look at the life expectency of NFL linemen. It is not healthy no matter if they are "in shape" in your opinion or not.
Does that mean you're going to stop watching football in protest? (Please say yes, please say yes).
fat coaches need love too
This face is going to come in SO HANDY during Fickell's tenure at tsio, however long it may last.
I love the smell of fear from Columbus.
Didn't even see your post. I like the way you move!
Great minds think alike.
I love the smell of fear!
but just came across this on SI.com.....Kyle Turley is an idiot
cant start my own thread but this thread was kind of the same topic
That's how we want you to feel.
It really dont matter what Hoke says because there will always be a Sparty or a Suckeye ripping it apart.
If Hoke says well we are not there yet and with the transition we are going to be less than great. The "morans" yes I said morans would be saying oh he is making excuses.
If hoke says we are Michigan and we are going to come out tough and play hard because we are Michigan and thats how we do things. The d-bags would say he is an arrogant ass and he needs to be hung by his nipples.
They forget the fact that Dumbtonio is a smug turd and Tressel is a lying slimey POS.
I wont say anything about Fickel. I know nothing about him and he seems like an ok guy but time will tell. Dont worry I hate him because he is a coach at Blowhio but hopefully he ends up a guy that I can at least respect. He does seem to be a bit shady with the I didnt know of any violations comments.
They didn't mind it when Jim Tressel did the same thing during his first season...
Best part of the piece was the comment section. Poster after poster said, "Oh, that 'Ohio' stuff Hoke pulls doesn't bother me at all, BUT I WISH THAT FUCKER WOULD DROWN," or something akin.
Hmmmm....sure glad he doesn't bug you there, Bucks.
Hoke isn't far, he's swole.
Hoke isn't far, he's swole.
I actually thought the 11 Warriors piece was really good, in a mostly meta way. He's pointing out that Hoke is a kind of genius, in that so much of his schtick appeals to the lowest common denominator football fan, and that is precisely why he will be so successful.
Look, countdown clocks are fucking moronic. Not wearing red is fucking idiotic. Not calling the school down south by its real name is fucking inane. Pablum cliches like "we're gonna get after it and be tough and run downhill and dominate the line of scrimmage" are fucking pablum cliches.
But all those moronic, idiotic, inane, pablum cliches are exactly what UM needed at this point. I think the only part of the fan base that is unsatisfied is overeducated, preening, petulant, pedantic, elitist snobs like BRCE, His Dudeness, yrs truly, and several others.
That's where all of Brian's snark comes from, by the way, doesn't it? The realization that, after Michigan rolled the dice with the future and it came up craps, we have returned to ye olde days of yore where men were men and ran downhill and dominated the line of scrimmage and got after it with toughness and downhill running.
It's galling to Brian to know that deep down, the Michigan fan base, despite turning up its noses at Sparty and OSU, is really no different. We puff out our chests when pencil-necked writers say mean things about our coach's waistline, we insert dollar signs to stand for the word "State" in university acronyms, we woof and bray at coaches who get it telling us we're getting back to old school smashmouth football.
I thought the 11 Warriors piece not only perfectly captured Hoke's genius, but also, probably unwittingly, provided real sociological insight into the meaning of college football, both for UM and for tUo$UIO or whatever.
Oh please. Everyone here who pines after RR is overeducated and pedantic, and the rest of us are just a bunch of yokels who ain't got no learnin'?
This is nonsense. RR's command of the English language was no better than Hoke's. He was every bit the same kind of cliché machine (HARD EDGE! HOLD THE ROPE! STRAP IT UP!). And if he was an advanced offensive mind, he certainly wasn't on defense, and wasn't too hot at personnel decisions, either. The "future of college football" does not have Greg Robinson working for it.
Rich Rodriguez was not the Alonquin Round Table member that you make him out to be. If any Michigan coach was a learned type, it was his predecessor, Carr, the guy you imply was just slightly above a Neanderthal on the evolutionary scale. Carr was also far more successful coaching Michigan than RR, the so-called "future of football," was. If he wasn't a flashy offensive mind, he was a good all-around football coach - and Hoke may prove to be as well.
Here's the truth: you simply have an emotional attachment to the old coach, and it's preventing you from embracing the new coach. Don't pretend it's something more rational than that. Sports fandom is never rational.
If you weren't such an irrational simpleton (did you see what I did there?) you'd get that the point of my post was not to comment on the hoi polloi, but rather to comment on the "elite." Nowhere did I say that RR is a Mensa candidate, but rather that the people who developed an attachment to him and (more to the point of my post) resisted returning to the old ways of Hoke did so because of what it represented about the direction of Michigan football.
It is true that I liked RR, and I agree that he was every bit the ordinary folks sort of guy that Hoke is. That proves the point that it isn't about the coach. After all, Lloyd was really the intellectual in the group. You are simply wrong that all of us butt hurt RR loverz were just emotionally attached to him, and that we're all just as irrational as the mouth breathers whom you claim I was denigrating but was in fact not.
The point is that at least I, and I think Brian, like the idea of creativity and scheme as the way to generate an advantage. RR represented that. Anyone who paid hundreds of dollas to go to the 2007 Rose Bowl (or even watched it on TV) will know why we got so fed up with latter-day Lloyd.
Enter Hoke. The point is that, whether or not he will ACTUALLY use scheme to his advantage (and his hiring of Borges and Mattison suggest that he will), he represents MANBALL. And before you get all spittle-flecked about the MANBALL meme, know that I am using it intentionally as a meme.
The point of the 11 Warriors post wasn't to talk about who Hoke actually is as a coach, since none of us knows. The point was about what he REPRESENTS to a football fan base. I was agreeing with him, and in the process taking a shot at ME, not at YOU. Do you get that now? You knuckle-dragging troglodyte (did you see what I did there?). And it's Algonquin, not Alonquin, you inbred hayseed (did you see what I did there?).
Anything to take your mind off of the iminent downfall of your beloved Ohio State Buckeyes, I suppose. Good to know that a positive mentality makes you an idiot. Hoke's in their heads.
up your coach ... neener, neener, neee-ner!
I havent seen one bit of "pompousness" *sp* from him, he seems completley humble. Its sad people judge someone elses coach that they havent seen in action. And the fat joke is old. Whenever i'm with my cousin and we see a fat guy he'll be like "I didnt know brady hoke was out driving!", honestley it is annoying.
isn't pompous. Peyton Manning is. And he has a bulbous nose. Brady Hoke is an angel.
Jim Tressel was the most humble head coach in football, and he showed his pride in that fact, by telling everyone who would listen
I mean seriously...who here talks nice about Tressel? Even before the accusations came out we all hated him. It is part of the rivalry, and a good part IMHE. Let them talk and let BH back up everything he has said (which I am sure he will do in the near future).