Everyone Murders

May 22nd, 2017 at 12:13 PM ^

The Scene:

Harbaugh delivers the calf, and immediately checks to see if it's male or female.  Or, as he puts it, "Milk or Steak".

Throws the calf in the Steak Bin, and carries on about his business.

HL2VCTRS

May 22nd, 2017 at 12:29 PM ^

That cow is going to make one hell of a full back, so this is obviously an unfair recruiting tactic.  Imprinting?  The SEC will never go for that.

FauxMo

May 22nd, 2017 at 12:36 PM ^

He then immediately chopped the calf's head off and ate the finest veal ever. With a large glass of raw unpasteurized milk, drunk straight from the nearest available teat... 

Perkis-Size Me

May 22nd, 2017 at 12:36 PM ^

Nothing surprises me anymore. The man does it all. 

I have to imagine his list of life goals for the next few years will look something like the following: 

2018 - Negotiate peace in the Middle East

2019 - Host satellite camp on the Moon. Because if you're going to have a satellite camp, why not put it on an actual satellite? Got to tap into that fertile lunar recruiting territory. 

2020 - While hosting next satellite camp on Mars, meet intelligent alien life forms, become Earth's first official Ambassador to the Aliens.

2021 - Get invited to alien's home world on the far side of the galaxy, becomes the first human to experience interstellar travel. 

Hopefully sandwiched somewhere in there is a national championship. 

rugbypike11

May 22nd, 2017 at 12:51 PM ^

On the way to the farm, he rescued a baby from a burning building.  On the way home, he climbed a tree and rescued a kitten.  He didn't realize the kitten was up the tree until he got up there.  It just looked like a good climbin' tree.

xtramelanin

May 22nd, 2017 at 1:15 PM ^

he can deliver xtramelanin cows and tomorrow, about 300 new chickens.  could use the help! 

and just think if he showed up when it was time to make the young bulls (bullocks) into steers.   now that would be a scene. 

xtramelanin

May 22nd, 2017 at 6:00 PM ^

and some, like tomorrow, get delivered when they are a day old.   we don't have capacity to keep constant brood stock on hand so we supplement.   

trueblueintexas

May 22nd, 2017 at 1:10 PM ^

My kid's Sunday shcool class sent home a "Flat Jesus" project kit for the summer based on the idea of Flat Stanley. Seeing this story reminded me that Harbaugh might be the one person where the real life could never be matched by people crowd sourcing a made up life.  

ST3

May 22nd, 2017 at 1:32 PM ^

I was a junior in high school. The kid I sat next to worked on a dairy farm before school. One day just before class started, he told me how he helped deliver a calf that morning. It was exhausting work. His arm was up the cow up to his elbow. We were watching a movie that day in class. Five minutes into the movie, he's out cold. We sat in the back row, but he was snoring so loud, people in the front row were turning around to see what was the commotion. Fortunately, the teacher was either deaf or didn't care.

LSAClassOf2000

May 22nd, 2017 at 1:32 PM ^

Each week, there's something that goes into the "Only Jim Harbaugh" category, and this week, it is a trip to a dairy farm which includes the opportunity to participate in the live birth of a calf. 

I definitely can't see Meyer or Saban doing this - maybe Nick Saban would, on occasion, reach up a cat to check for kittens (when no one was looking, mind you), but that's about it. 

The Oracle

May 22nd, 2017 at 3:02 PM ^

Do you think there's ever a day where Harbaugh just sits on the couch and does nothing? Neither do I.