Give me your best (fake) Fred Jackson

Submitted by GRBluefan on

So when I was making  a smart-ass comment on the Chris Wormley thread below, I got to thinking it might be a good use of our creative energy (or at least a moderately enteraining way to kill some mid-August time) to create a montage of Fred Jackson-esqeue priase quotes.  You know, make up some ridiculous comments about player X, comparing him to players Y and Z from the past.  I'll get us started with the comment that I was typing when I had this moment of clarity:

 

I heard Chris Wormley is like a cross between a more powerful Ndamukong Suh and a quicker Jevon Kearse. /fredjackson'd (/fredjackson'd stolen from dennisblundon)

A bonus entry:

Drew Dileo is really looking good out there.  He actually reminds me a lot of a young Wes Welker, except with better route running ability and a little bit more grit.  /fredjackson'd

ijohnb

August 24th, 2011 at 8:38 AM ^

is like....

Scorcese only more authentic, Spielberg only more imaginative, Mendez only more insightful, Malick only more visually appealing, Kubrick only more unsettling, Eastwood only more gritty, and Michael Mann with better character development.

Guy is going to win an oscar someday.....

ijohnb

August 24th, 2011 at 9:59 AM ^

Lars Von Trier is a crazy man who makes movies.  Horror movies, but not conventional ones.  Make a grown man have nightmares ones.  Watch AntiChrist if you dare.  Actually, don't.  I am not on record with that as a recommendation at all. 

Actually please don't.

In reply to by ijohnb

74polSKA

August 24th, 2011 at 10:21 AM ^

Now you're just making me want to check it out more.  Scary spiritual/religious movies are the only ones that really freak me out, too.  You must have really pissed somebody off if they recommended him to you.  Ex-girlfriend?

ijohnb

August 24th, 2011 at 10:45 AM ^

2009.  Wife and I decided to go with the scary movie option. It was dark night, Michigan had just screwed the pooch in Champaign, and I was looking for a mental getaway with a good scary motive.  We came across AntiChrist on demand.  I can honesty say wathcing this movie was a mistake.  The name is misleading, it is not spiritual or religious, at least not on its face.  I guess there are some religious undertones if you look hard enough, but you won't want to look at all.  Not for the faint of anything. 

909Dewey

August 24th, 2011 at 9:35 AM ^

Q: Coach Jackson what are your impressions so far of Brady Hoke as Head Coach?

A: Let me tell you – and we have had some tremendous coaches here. Brady brings a love of Michigan, a passion. So in that sense he is like Bo, but more passionate. He will show more emotion on the sidelines than Bo ever did. Brady has that determination – a stubborn determination. I would say more stubborn than Lloyd Carr. He is approachable though almost like Rich Rodriguez only folksier. More down to earth.

I can say I wouldn’t want any other coach on my sideline. And he has had an incredible camp – just an amazing camp. I would say he is as good as any coach in the Big Ten right now, maybe even the country.

michgoblue

August 24th, 2011 at 10:04 AM ^

This whole thing is getting played out, but it is still fun.  My entry:

This Brinks kid - he has the drive and dedication of Kovacs, the "grittiness" of a white running back, the relative strength for his size of a japanese beatle, and the football knowledge of Brian Cook.  He is going to be special.  I mean players like him only come along once in a generation.

Tater

August 24th, 2011 at 10:17 AM ^

That's life.  Everything that is funny gets played out.  Then we move on to something else that makes us laugh until it is played out, too.  Such is humor.

legalblue

August 24th, 2011 at 12:07 PM ^

He really has the ability to be one of the greatest bloggers I've seen come through these internets.  He's got the whole package spelling, grammer, really a total blogger.  He's like a major media outlet only faster.

bluefrombirth

August 24th, 2011 at 12:21 PM ^

Dantonio's tough talk on discipline is so hypocritical when it comes down to implementing it. It's kinda like when you 2girls One cup, then getting pop up by meatspin, only to get rickrolled to lemon party, but not as subtle as goatse..................

 

For the love all things respectable, do not try to find any of those, if you do may god have merc on your soul.

ManBalls

August 24th, 2011 at 12:45 PM ^

Your impressions of Coach Hoke?

Tremendous honesty, integrity, and passion.

A relentless leader with unbreakable determination.

 

He is a lot like Jesus Christ and Winston Churchill, only more altruistic than JC and more courageous than old Winston.

MGrad

August 24th, 2011 at 2:46 PM ^

He has the power of Biakabatuka, except more because of his speed which is like Tyrone Wheatley only faster.  He's going to be fun to watch kinda like a clown, only funner.  I can definitely see him breaking the records of the greatest Michigan tailbacks, except he'll probably break Barry Sanders' records, too.  He has phenomenal vision like a hawk, but he can see even smaller holes.  When he hits that hole, he's gone, but more like "where did he go?" more than he isn't here any more.  It makes me wonder sometimes if I should blink except I do.