Completely OT: Your thoughts on Father teaches Daughter Facebook Lesson?

Personally, I like the dad's willingness to take more drastic action when necessary, but I think he got the execution wrong. I think he showed his anger a bit too much and I don't unloading that many rounds was a good idea.

If I were him, I would have kept it short, sweet, and to the point. I probably would not have deemed destroying the laptop necessary either, only taking it away, but since I don't know the full story here, I will assume for the sake of this scenario that drastic action was required. I think a baseball bat and a single, hard swing would have been more appropriate. Sends the message without getting excessive, but if guns are his thing, one shot would have been good enough, and he definitely should have calmed down first.

As far as "violence" goes, I don't think its unreasonable to spank kids who do something to really earn it up until they are teenagers. That's when you have to start relying on taking things away, and I don't think destroying a laptop is out of scope if the situation really warrants it. Like I mentioned before, I think the dad's composure when he made the video was not paticularly good, as I believe he overreacted with much of what he said and with the excessiveness of shooting it multiple times, but hey, if taking it away doesn't drive the point home, maybe destroying it will.

I was just waiting for him to close the video with "ROLL DAMN TAHDE"

The guy is a tool. I really think adding new hardware was an exuse to check out her computer. The fact that he's mad that she's complaining about her parents is asinine. Isn't that what kids are supposed to do? If anything he may have made his point but he'll probably have a terrible relationship with his daughter the rest of his life. I hope it was worth it....btw I have 3 kids.

The guy is a tool. I really think adding new hardware was an exuse to check out her computer. The fact that he's mad that she's complaining about her parents is asinine. Isn't that what kids are supposed to do? If anything he may have made his point but he'll probably have a terrible relationship with his daughter the rest of his life. I hope it was worth it....btw I have 3 kids.

I might be in the minority. I mean, I wouldn't have done it, it was a bad idea and all, and I don't think it was ever going to do anything but further alienate his daughter, but I think people are making waaaay too big a deal of this. And the only reason it was ever made into the story it is is because he used an evil, nasty gun. As a self proclaimed gun nut, I'm sensitive to the demonization of firearms; I've had plenty of people look at me sideways when they hear I own my own small armory. He was dumb to destroy a working, useful laptop. But go ahead. Shoot the crap out of your stuff if you want to. (in a safe and legal manner, of course) You should have that right in a free country. But if you really want to teach your daughter a lesson, post a video of yourself wiping her hard drive, spit-shining the thing and donating it to Goodwill. At least if you're going to pull a 1911 on it and light it up, paint a target on it and get some good practice out of it.

You know what would have been a better punishment? Deleting her facebook account and then wiping her hard drive. Have fun with no pictures and videos of your life.

This parent has real problems.  Parents shouldn't smoke in front of their kids, it sets a bad example.  Then to post it on facebook as an example for all her friends?  That's like giving them each a pack and saying it's cool.

Just turned in on the 9th of this month actually...

/Since21IsSoImportant

Boys at least use fake guns as toys and talk about killing and shooting their friends all the time. I think people are making way too big of a deal over the fact that he used a gun. And this is coming from someone who's almost 30, has never shot a gun and doesn't care to, and was a vegetarian for 10 years.

I'm over 21.  I am the father of an amazing 2 1/2 year old girl and hope to have at least one more child.  I own a gun (12 gauge for hunting purposes).  I've tried to read all the posts but feel like we are getting distracted by the periphery and losing focus on the core issue, which is my main problem with this video and the ensuing discussion.

The issue is that we as parents need to show our children unconditional love.  We often have trouble doing this because we have never been loved unconditionally.  We have baggage, past hurts, anger, distractions, work, etc. etc.   We learn how to treat people by watching how our parents treat us.  The father in this video mentions that he left home in HS and worked two jobs.  What happened in his home that prompted this decision?  He mentioned a divorce, so what has his daughter been taught about relationships through that process?  Our actions will always speak louder to our children than words. 

I have a lot of issues in my personality from my childhood.  I do things that I don't want to do every day.  If I can't identify what those issues are and learn how to deal with them, my daughter will likely have the same issues in her life.  I am blessed to have a wife that is willing to help me work through these things and also to help me stay on track with our daughter (she's a social worker, bless her soul).  It is a lot of hard work to maintain a vigilance about how you treat your kids and other people.

I could go on all day.  I guess that I don't think the video clears anything up in the situation but is a symptom of the problem.  I'm afraid that it is too inflammatory in its delivery to really promote open discussion.  I'm sorry you had to read this.  Please go on with your day.

While I agree it probably would have been better to have said 'The next time this happens, we will give your laptop to someone who appreciates it', once the ultimatum was made it would be a bad precedent not to follow through with your word.

Growing up with divorced parents and a joint custody environment - I knew how to take advantage of my parents and play them against each other. My grandfather, however, was more of a parent to me than either of them.

He was a drill sergeant in the army, and when he said something he meant it. I recall clearly the three times I had the audacity (or bravery/stupidity/childish arrogance) to challenge and or question him. Each time I regretted it. The worst punishment I ever received was when I thought I would be sneaky and padded my pants with toilet paper when I knew I was going to be spanked.

The result was my obedience, and in restrospect, my great respect for what he taught me.

The father should have thought about his disciplinary methods, but once in place needed to stick to them. Giving the laptop to someone unable to afford one would have had a better end result, but probably not 30M hits either.

And as far as using a gun to make his point, I have no objection. Almost any method of destruction would result in violence. Would people be as opposed had he destroyed it with a bat, taser, or axe?

Seems like both the daughter and father enjoy making public spectacles of themselves and can't or won't communicate effectively directly to each other: they're more into showing off for an audience. And the father seems worse than the daughter.  They both seem bullheaded.  My advice for parenting

1) Ignore most parenting advice from someone who has only one child--they too often assume every child will react like their child.

2) A second parent or other involved adult can do wonders to help balance each other out and act as a check on overly emotional reactions to the child's behavior

3) As children get older, they really should be allowed greater involvement and freedom in what they do and in their environment (not to say there can't be clear and inviolable boundaries).

4) Carrots and sticks do wonders in teaching children about rights, wrongs, and responsibilities.  Some respond better to one than the other.

The situation with the video seems to have the involvement of the mother as well.  But, the whole I spent x dollars and x time installing software seems like he did it as a gift.  Maybe he did.There's no sense that she even wanted the new software though (maybe she did, but given the father's rant, it seems he would have mentioned that).  I have a bullheaded daughter that punishment never worked on, but if she wanted something that cost more than $100 I made her earn it by doing extra duties over a period of weeks, and she thrived on that.  I have 3 children, one older than 21.  Thankfully our relationships never got to the point as this one. And if it ever did, my wife would have reeled me in before I posted something on youtube. But, before this whole fiasco, I would have tried to compromise on something to let the daughter have at least some say in the household (for example, allow her to decide about making her bed or not and perhaps letting her trade one of the other duties for some other from a list of duties).  By the teenage years, children need to start being treated as young adults with at least some give and take. If nothing else, you'll help develop their persuasive and bargaining skills.