Coachspeak 101

Submitted by Ziff72 on

I saw that Gerg was going to simplify things this year to help out the young guys. That bodes well because the last time we heard that was 06 when English took over.

I like Gerg, but this is classic coach speak. After every bad defensive year the coach sasy we're gonna simplify things so the kids can play more aggressive. Have you ever heard a DC say, "well my schemes were way too simple last year so we're going to get really complex this year, these dumbasses better start learning up or they won't see the field."

The coaches need to say something to the media so I don't blame them per se , I just find it funny. I I love the predictability of the talk according to the situation.

Brian has noted how every incoming DC is going to blitz more.

My personal favorite is when the control freak coach leaves and is replaced by the fun loving coach and they say yhey are going to open things up a little bit more despite their previous success. This is always follwed by the players (usually the qb) saying how things are really going to take off now that they have more freedom. Then it really doesn't.

Anybody have their favorite??

Jeffro

January 31st, 2010 at 4:16 PM ^

Here at Michigan we're going to be installing a state of the art spread option attack that is not suitable for any QB with NFL aspirations. The defense will be geared towards a spread style passing attacks because so many of those exist in the big 10 these days.

mattbern

January 31st, 2010 at 4:21 PM ^

"No, we haven't even begun thinking about our huge rivalry game with that team that we absolutely hate. Were just gonna take it one game at a time."

QVIST

January 31st, 2010 at 4:26 PM ^

"We're gonna go out and leave it all on the field."
"We're gonna give 110%."
"At the end of the day..."
"It is what it is."
"I think if we -----, and -----, we're going to be okay."

BiSB

January 31st, 2010 at 5:14 PM ^

...but we're making too many mistakes. The opportunities are there, we just need to take advantage of them."

Translation: HOLD ONTO THE GODDAMN BALL

shoelace

January 31st, 2010 at 5:25 PM ^

Love this thread.

How about "I wish you guys could see the development we are making during the week in practice. The guys put it together in practice, but it hasn't translated onto the field on Saturdays yet" or something along those lines.

jmblue

January 31st, 2010 at 5:38 PM ^

I enjoy when players/coaches say "Like I said" to refer to something they didn't say before in the interview.

Reporter: How are you going to get ready for the big game against Team X?

Player: We're gonna come out and just play our brand of ball, and like I said, if we control the line of scrimmage and take care of the ball, good things are going to happen. So we're just going to come out and, like I said, put pressure on the quarterback..."

(They also love to start sentences with "We're gonna come out" Did we fear they might stay in the locker room?)

Blazefire

February 1st, 2010 at 9:46 AM ^

"Well, you know, we were gonna come out and play them hard, really stick our assignments and try to get some scoring going, but it is terribly cold, and I don't know about you, but I and a couple of the coaches are serious pansies about the cold. I mean, like, I need a blanket and some hot chocolate right now. SO instead of coming out, I thought maybe we'd stay in there, and see if the other team wants to finish this game with a competitive round of bridge."

MGoViso

January 31st, 2010 at 5:40 PM ^

they'd say, "We're adjusting our defensive philosophy and implementing more packages to better utilize all our depth and to get the proper type of athlete in depending on the situation."
Translation: OH SHIT COACH AM I SUPPOSED TO GO IN OR NOT?

Bluerock

January 31st, 2010 at 6:49 PM ^

Coachspeak was invented because they couldn't tell the truth, why.... BECAUSE YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH.
Coaches can't say ...we can't throw,can't run,can't tackle,can't defend against the pass,we just are not very good.
Our players have little stubby legs and stumps for arms and small hands,there is not a football player in the bunch.