Brian Kelly - DB Extraordinaire
For all of the angst, heartache, and pain we've experienced under the current staff - I am SO glad our coaches don't routinely throw players under the bus.
Brian Kelly is a Douche. I would never want any kid of mine to play for this a$$hole. That is all.
Reporter: Brian, how can you, I know they're not all on Golson, especially the picks, but the fumbles, consistently-
Kelly: Why aren't they all on Golson?
But...but...but...
Kelly interrupted to make sure Golson received the full blame for his turnovers before immediately backing down when reminded of what actually occurred (as well as things he previously said).
November 9th, 2014 at 9:53 PM ^
He should've just went with the Al Borges: "We didn't execute."
November 9th, 2014 at 9:54 PM ^
and think Dave Brandon, but know you meant d-bag.... I guess both fit.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:06 PM ^
and was very confused.
November 9th, 2014 at 11:08 PM ^
spot on
November 9th, 2014 at 11:18 PM ^
about "damaged brown-eye"? I'm ok with that too. LOL
November 9th, 2014 at 11:36 PM ^
I kind of like Dumb Blondes!
November 10th, 2014 at 8:17 AM ^
mmmm...dumb blondes.
November 10th, 2014 at 9:38 AM ^
She really was a special talent back then.
November 10th, 2014 at 2:20 PM ^
Wax on, wax off.
November 10th, 2014 at 9:10 AM ^
But yes Kelly is the type of vindictive and callous coach where almost everyone who plays for him will leave the school not feeling very good about their experience.
November 9th, 2014 at 11:00 PM ^
They both mean the same thing.
November 10th, 2014 at 2:24 PM ^
I say let's create the term: Douche Brandon. Fits pretty much everything a person can loathe.
November 9th, 2014 at 9:56 PM ^
"I'd rather have that DB and his results than a good guy who goes 6-6 every year."
November 9th, 2014 at 10:03 PM ^
It does make some sense though, doesn't it?
November 9th, 2014 at 10:05 PM ^
Please, I beg you, isn't there a third option?
November 9th, 2014 at 10:00 PM ^
ummm we have a clapping sea otter as a coach that never yells or blames players. some times an ass as a coach is a good thing.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:07 PM ^
I'd rather have Hoke than Kelly.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:09 PM ^
you Mr. Graham.
Plenty of coaches get results without being a DB (pick your choice of acronym). I prefer to win with respect and unity within the team, the team, the team.
November 9th, 2014 at 11:03 PM ^
Hahaha, what? You note that plenty of coaches get results without being a DB, in response to Magnus saying he would rather have Hoke? Wow. You prefer to win. I'm not sure you are rooting for the right team.
November 9th, 2014 at 11:20 PM ^
Were you complaining during the 11-2 Sugar Bowl win season? I think not. Results have been less than optimal, but we won with class, and have lost with class...AS A TEAM.
Not sure if you are rooting for the right team yourself (DB'd - yes, THAT DB).
November 10th, 2014 at 2:50 PM ^
Right, like when Hoke didn't shake Urban's hand, or when the team beat Ohio and did whatever that was, or when Hoke called Notre Dame chicken. I'm nolt saying any of this was wrong, I loved it. But don't sit up there on your high horse and think Michigan is any classier than anyone else. It's a matter of perception, opinion and tribalism. Give me an asshole who wins any day of the week as long as he doesn't break the rules. Michigan needs someone with passion who doesn't back down or apologize for a change.
November 10th, 2014 at 10:26 AM ^
Would you take either of these over Hoke? Just asking.
November 10th, 2014 at 2:46 PM ^
Right or wrong, it's this mentality that keeps Michigan from a top hire. Acting like we're on a higher moral ground, even when the disliked coach has no violations on his record, is a stupid way to run a football department. I wonder how many threads like these will pop up on rival message boards if we land Jimmy. I could be alone on this, but I'd take Todd Graham, Brian Kelly or any other coach not "Michigan" enough if they do well at their jobs. Save the hypocritical puritan shit for church.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:08 PM ^
In no circumstance is this sort of thing OK.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:08 PM ^
I wonder what those weird tire marks on Joe Bolden's back are...
November 9th, 2014 at 10:15 PM ^
Kelly blamed one kid's performance for a team's loss.
Hoke blamed one kid for one thing that TV cameras caught. There was no way to say Bolden didn't do it. Even still, he didn't mention him by name. But yeah, I really wish Hoke would have said, "I fucked up."
Hoke is a better person than Kelly. And it's not very close.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:09 PM ^
Except when he called out Hagerup for not getting enough hang-time on his punts, whilst being solely responsible for our idiotic punt coverage..
November 9th, 2014 at 10:58 PM ^
yeah, throw a kid "under the bus" in a press conference is way worse than putting a injured player back on the field. I don't like Kelly but you people acting like he is Satan because of this, well you are a little insane
November 10th, 2014 at 8:52 AM ^
You do remember a student actually DIED during one of their practices don't you. He isn't even close to being the man Hoke is.
November 10th, 2014 at 9:19 AM ^
but it was a freak accident.
BK was stupid there, not malicious.
November 10th, 2014 at 11:01 AM ^
He NEVER should have been on that lift. Dangerously high winds were in the forecast for days ahead of it. Occupational Safety took ND to task for not observing safety rules (and common sense). BK conveniently said that winds weren't that bad when practice started (fuck the forecat) and that it wasn't his call anyway. Much the same way that ordering a kid to run through equipment backward was somebody else's mistake...only not one damn bit funny.
November 10th, 2014 at 11:12 PM ^
Who had "4 minutes" in the office pool?
November 9th, 2014 at 10:05 PM ^
Plus I hear he hangs out at truck stops
November 9th, 2014 at 10:07 PM ^
Indiana for assholes like him.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:20 PM ^
I'm just disappointed said place is so close to Michigan
November 10th, 2014 at 8:38 AM ^
Terre Haute?
November 9th, 2014 at 10:07 PM ^
Ehh. I'd probably rather have this than Brady Hoke telling me how good Gardner looked in practice. I agree he looks like a horse's ass most of the time and is generally angry, but then.. I want Jim Harbaugh, so what can I say?
November 9th, 2014 at 10:11 PM ^
That's certainly your prerogative, but I really hope that you are in the minority of Michigan fans.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:38 PM ^
are in the minority? I agree that Brian Kelly is awful (and perhaps deserves to be arrested for the crane in the wind incident) and I wouldn't want him either, but how could you possibly prefer a well-mannered coach who loses (i.e. Hoke) vs. a guy like Jim Harbaugh?
November 9th, 2014 at 10:51 PM ^
tell me where Harbaugh called out a specific player and blamed him for a loss? I know Harbaugh is abrasive (read: D!ck), but he is loyal to a fault. Unless you can provide a specific example of where Harbaugh backed the bus up over one of his players - you quite simply cannot compare the two.
November 9th, 2014 at 11:04 PM ^
johnthesavage did and I just commented on it. He said he'd take Kelly over Hoke but prefers Harbaugh over both. Reader71 said he hopes that kind of thinking is in the minority amongst Michigan fans... I took that to mean that Reader71 values a coach's demeanor above their W/L record, meaning I have to assume he prefers Hoke over Harbaugh.
November 9th, 2014 at 11:14 PM ^
clearly Reader 71 was responding to kelly throwing a kid under a bus vs hoke praising gardner when he doesn't play well.
November 9th, 2014 at 11:25 PM ^
how could you possibly prefer a well-mannered coach who loses (i.e. Hoke) vs. a guy like Jim Harbaugh?
I appreciate your reference to another post (r.e. Reader71), but the context of your statement implies Harbaugh would be willing to throw a kid under the bus - which I think is a questionable stance.
I apologize if I misunderstood your intent.
November 10th, 2014 at 12:01 AM ^
I didn't mean to imply that Harbaugh would try to make his kids look bad in press conferences -- I don't think he would. I don't want Brian Kelly. And I hate the "under the bus" metaphor/cliche which makes no sense. I would never say that!
BUT I do think Harbaugh is a gruff, mean looking guy most of the time, who probably isn't super-fun to play for. In this way, he has more in common with Kelly than Hoke. And that's fine. Our team plays like a team whose coaching staff blows smoke up their ass non-stop. Frankly, I think we need a bit of the opposite. And results matter.
November 10th, 2014 at 8:45 AM ^
BUT I do think Harbaugh is a gruff, mean looking guy most of the time, who probably isn't super-fun to play for.
Frankly, I think Michigan could use a little of that right now. You think Bo was fun to play for? I don't think half his team walked out on him in his first season because he was giving the guys rub-downs after practice and tucking them into bed at night.
November 10th, 2014 at 8:49 AM ^
To clarify, I was saying that I would rather have a coach who doesn't blame losses on one player even when we are losing, than a winning coach who blames this players after a loss.
We have eyes. We know Gardner's play has been a problem. We do not need a coach to tell us that. And the harm done to a player by this kind of thing (when the player is already blaming himself AND does not get paid to perform) far outweighs any purpose this might serve the coach. I can't think of a legitimate purpose for this, either.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:11 PM ^
When your QB has 4 picks and 2 fumbles (1 lost) I can see where Kelly is coming from... It's not like Golson suddenly started turning the ball over... it's been plaguing him for weeks now. Perhaps he's trying to light a fire under his QB... so let's see some reason other than "KELLY IS DOUCHEBAG IM GONNA HYPOCRITALLY BE THANKFUL HE ISNT OUR COACH LBAH BLAHBLAH"
Just saying.
November 9th, 2014 at 10:52 PM ^
hold a kid accountable and light a fire WITHOUT making it public in the media. Doing that is prime DB territory.
November 9th, 2014 at 11:09 PM ^
He's probably already tried the non-public approach and it's obviously hasn't worked, so maybe now he's trying this approach. Every player responds to different methods. Maybe Golson needs some DB-ing to change.