Bemidji State hate/jokes thread

I'll start: Q: How does a University of Michigan alum efficiently remove a Bemidji State University alum from his or her front porch? A: Exchange money for the food items the Bemidji State University alum has delivered to his or her place of residence. The University of Michigan alum should be sure to tip handsomely as not only do Bemidji State University alumni often earn wages below the national median, but this action will also indicate that the food purchaser has a fair amount of disposable income as a direct or indirect result of his or her University of Michigan education. FIRE AWAY.