AP Top News at 3:35 p.m. EST
Michigan State University athletic director Mark Hollis made an announcement earlier today that is leaving many University of Michigan fans scratching their heads.
“I read a compelling article by the thoughtful and fair-minded columnist of the Detroit Free Press, Drew Sharp, in which he decried the inequity of Michigan receiving a BCS bowl invitation instead of Michigan State,” offered Hollis. “Frankly, after carefully considering his arguments, I was forced to agree with his assessment.”
Hollis went on to describe a subsequent conversation with Michigan athletic director David Brandon about rectifying the situation and placating the frustration of Mr. Sharp. “I told David that I had a great idea,” stated Hollis. “Why don’t we send our players to the Sugar Bowl to play the Hokies and dress in your uniforms and you can send your players to Florida and play Georgia dressed as Spartans. That’ll fix everything.”
Hollis then added, “Brandon told me, ‘Sure Mark. Okee-Dokee,’ but I couldn’t really tell if he was being sarcastic. So we’ve taken the initiative and sent a bus with our uniforms over to Ann Arbor to hopefully cement the deal.”
When asked later, Mr. Sharp stated, “While I appreciate the effort put forth by the Michigan State athletic director, his remedy doesn’t go far enough. This inequity is akin to a civil rights violation. I think the University of Michigan should be forced to pay monetary damages and impose recruiting limitations on themselves. They should also seriously consider dramatic reductions in practice time next season while vacating any 2012 wins they are fortunate enough to realize.”
Player reaction to the role reversal from the two teams was mixed. The Wolverine players were unanimously against the concept whereas nearly all of the Spartans were anxious to don the classic maize and blue uniforms. “It will be, like, major cool to wear the uniform of the school I wasn’t smart enough to get into,” offered one Spartan on the condition of anonymity.
(NOT from AP)