Another Decommit - I Blame Delaney [parody]

Submitted by MGoShoe on

Oh, woe is Michigan.

“Much of being a legend is about fame,” said the recruit. “And while that’s great, fame doesn’t necessarily leave a positive impact on the world. Leaders do. So I wanted to play for a team that is associated with leaders. Let those other teams worry about being legends.”

Illinois head coach Ron Zook said he is excited to get his commitment.

“I was honestly worried when we were placed in the Leaders division that we would miss out on all the kids who want to be legends,” said Zook. “But this young man is showing that he has great character. You can’t have enough players like that.”

Michigan head coach Rich Rodriguez says he pleaded with him to reconsider.

“Before the conference announced the division names, he was 100-percent committed to Michigan,” said Rodriguez. “If it wasn’t for the division names, that young man would be wearing maize and blue next year. I told him that they were just meaningless, soul-crushing, corporate-created placeholders, but he said he didn’t want to risk it.”

This sucks. Discuss amongst yourselves.