Albom on Hoke
http://www.freep.com/article/20110901/COL01/109010576/Mitch-Albom-Meat-…
It's the latest episode of "What Makes A Michigan Man So Michigany?," with your host, New Jersey native and Brandeis University graduate, Mitch Albom!
Mitch crystallizes exactly who all of us are and what all of us want in a Michigan coach -- STEAK!
(*Freep warning and all that*)
September 1st, 2011 at 5:15 PM ^
I thought he stopped covering sports in order to write schmaltzy books about heaven.
September 1st, 2011 at 5:19 PM ^
This exact same information could have been written up as "Cow killer picks up underage girls at amusement parks. Coaching legend can't quite remember his name."
September 2nd, 2011 at 3:51 AM ^
To me, Mitch Albom is like the motel psychic, turned self-proclaimed medium. There was a time when he was self aware. He knew what he was doing, and he was very good at it; but after hitting on one too many cold reads, or receiving effusive praise from one too many crying widows, he began to believe he actually was psychic. His subsequent successes only fueled the delusion, and now it has become old hat for Mitch. A woman walks in wearing a bright print dress, sits down, and before she can even speak he says, "You've lost your husband last week." She bursts into tears. Those who are onto his game keep on driving, but there are always suckers, and suckers always seem to have $2, along with a propensity to end up finding shitty motels. There was a time when Mitch Albom was a conscious writer. There was a time when Orson Welles was a motel psychic. Only one chose to cease working in shitty motels.
September 1st, 2011 at 5:24 PM ^
Did not read, but can
Guarantee, there are lots of
one-line sentences.
September 1st, 2011 at 5:59 PM ^
Mitch did not go to ball game
Yet "saw" people there
Editor then slapped his wrist.
September 1st, 2011 at 11:31 PM ^
You inverted your syllable counts buddy. A haiku is 5-7-5.
English nerd'd.
September 2nd, 2011 at 11:38 AM ^
Is going to be the name of my Ska Band.
September 1st, 2011 at 5:31 PM ^
or some such?
September 1st, 2011 at 5:45 PM ^
...for having been caught in the act of quite literally "mailing in" one of his columns, this one was figuratively "mailed in."
You've got to hand it to Albom; he knows what his audience wants, and he spoons it up with a kind of mechanical precision and regularity.
It's funny; tomorrow will mark what I think is the two-year anniversary of the day that Albom's radio program featured Brian Cook, and then a few minutes later, me, as interview subjects on The Jihad. That was the infamous occasion on which Albom asked Brian what his full time job was, when he wasn't blogging. And then he asked Brian how a blog makes any money. It was vintage Albom.
Anyway, Albom and his co-hosts were very polite to Brian, and Brian was excrutiatingly polite and pleasant with them. Which makes me all the more glad that I was hot-headed with Albom. Predictably, Albom was totally defensive about the Freep. But I am not so sure, but that Albom now has some real questions about The Jihad. Albom talks to a lot of people, and he's no dummy. He works at the same radio station as Frank Beckmann, and it defies comprehension to think that Frank Beckmann hasn't taken Albom aside and told him what a bunch of bullshit the Freep published under the Rosenberg-Snyder byline. I do think that Albom (unlike Sharp, who was no more involved in the orginal Jihad than was Albom) is more than happy to keep his distance from the Rosenberg shit.
September 1st, 2011 at 5:51 PM ^
Psychatric ward allows you to call in radio shows?
Seriously, though. You're expecting nobility or a sense of justice from Frank Beckmann? You're looking in the wrong place.
September 1st, 2011 at 7:21 PM ^
Is not being "interviewed".
September 1st, 2011 at 9:06 PM ^
I'm trying to remember; I think Albom's broadcast partner said something like, "How long did we have that guy on?" It was interesting. Funny thing is I was on my way in the car to the Tigers game that night, and so I was a little distracted. I think it was about 10 minutes, which is a long time on talk radio.
September 2nd, 2011 at 7:43 AM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 5:54 PM ^
The blog has not been updated in years, but it stands the test of time.
http://mitchalbomisaterriblewriter.blogspot.com/
September 1st, 2011 at 5:58 PM ^
It sounds like such a fairy tale.
Like when he wouldn't answer Dave Brandon's call til his wife was by his side.
How he wouldn't wear red because of 'Ohio'.
He would have walked to Michigan from California.
He gets Mattison for a DC.
He gets Denard for a QB.
He refuses to make a negative comment about RR, JT, Ohio...
He seems to genuinely cares for the kids. It's all about them.
And it's all about Michigan...the tradition.
The countdown clocks, Team 132, we honor those who have gone before, the Victors blaring from his office for a solid hour every day.
Toughness, not a gimmick, not basketball on grass.
"Let's line up 'cause I'm about to punch you in the mouth."
All he's got to do now is win.
And I believe he's going to.
Because everything he can control, he's doing the right way. And what's out of his control, seems to be falling into place.
September 1st, 2011 at 6:15 PM ^
This comment is one of the best I've ever seen on this blog. I am actually unable to tell whether smotheringD (A) has put together a brilliant parody of the Albom article, (B) excerpted choice bits of the Albom article with a special emphasis on the Albom faux-profound one-sentence paragraph, or (C) simply cut-and-pasted the entire Albom article.
And I don't want to know, because it really doesn't matter. A, B, or C aside, Albom sucks with a force generally only associated black holes.
September 1st, 2011 at 6:04 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 6:09 PM ^
into hackneyed, maudlin pablum. He's later-period Rick Reilly (as opposed to awesome SI feature writer Rick Reilly) without even having Reilly's (terrible) sense of humor.
If Bill Plaschke didn't exist, Albom would be the worst sportswriter in America.
September 1st, 2011 at 6:15 PM ^
I once heard Plaschke on the radio in LA say that Little League baseball is one of the worst things you can do for your kids because they have to stand at the plate by themselves and will feel bad if/when they strike out.
Mitch Albom just exploits dying people to make loads of cash from those sad souls who most fear death. I guess that is better.
September 1st, 2011 at 6:30 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 6:37 PM ^
He makes dumb people laugh and cry. I'm sorry if you're one of those people.
September 1st, 2011 at 6:45 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 6:49 PM ^
No offense Cope, but it's a blog so I'm not worries about respect. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, you clearly have very strong feeling about Mitch Albom, so I'll let you be. I just don't think he's any good, and I don't seem to be alone.
September 1st, 2011 at 7:04 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 7:06 PM ^
given some of the phrases you're turning ("reflections in wishing wells") . . . are you, in fact, Mitch Albom?
September 1st, 2011 at 7:19 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 7:30 PM ^
September 2nd, 2011 at 1:42 AM ^
I think I would like to punch you in the dick.
September 1st, 2011 at 6:39 PM ^
Albom is to writing what AIDS is to screwing.
September 1st, 2011 at 6:46 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 6:46 PM ^
make people cry. Being able to tug at the heartstrings is a skill, but it's not a very good determination of whether someone is a great writer. If it is, then there's no distinction between the first 15 minutes of "Up" and the last 15 minutes of "the Notebook", and that's bullshit.
Albom's writing is basically the perfect epitome of the Kundera quote about kitsch: "Kitsch causes two tears to flow in quick succession. The first tear says: How nice to see children running on the grass! The second tear says: How nice to be moved, together with all mankind, by children running on the grass!"
Albom's entire shtick is to say "look how wonderful it is that we're moved by this thing that is going on." He draws emotions out of people by being manipulative. He doesn't earn his tears or laughs honestly, but instead gets them through an incredibly calculated attempt to push the right buttons. The fact that he's won numerous awards and made millions of dollars out of that is appalling.
September 1st, 2011 at 6:56 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 7:01 PM ^
there are numerous writers who can give you those emotions in a more honest fashion.
September 1st, 2011 at 7:17 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 7:20 PM ^
Unless it has to do with sports, in which case having fun = the robots have won the day.
http://deadspin.com/5644264/playing-down-to-your-audience
Seriously, read this and then explain to me how Mitch Albom doesn't suck at life.
September 1st, 2011 at 9:27 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 9:43 PM ^
+1 for the killer analogy.
September 1st, 2011 at 10:11 PM ^
September 1st, 2011 at 11:34 PM ^
Sure, various parts of her are as fake as a Mitch Albom column, but still...
September 2nd, 2011 at 12:05 AM ^
but her ass is better
September 1st, 2011 at 6:25 PM ^
...like "Doberman on Rosenberg."
September 1st, 2011 at 6:41 PM ^
Didnt know that Coach Hoke played drums. Thats pretty cool. Perhaps he will get a set for the office and pound out some chourses of The Victors.... or perhaps not.
September 1st, 2011 at 6:45 PM ^
Good friend of mine found himself alone in an elevator with Mitch Albom a couple years back. Being a sports fan, my friend says to Mitch "Hi, you are Mitch Albom... right?" Albom says nothing just stares straight ahead.... My friend is taken back by this unfriendliness and decides to try again "Well I just wanted to tell you that Ive always enjoyed your columns and have read your books...their great"... Albom says nothing, does not acknowledge my friend, looks straight ahead and exits straight out when the elevator opens.
Now maybe Mitch was having a bad day, but that 'tude is kinda weird to say the least when someone is just being friendly to you.
September 1st, 2011 at 8:08 PM ^
Albom wrote a book on the Fab Five but completely missed the real story. Wasn't that where Webber first whined about not having enough money to buy a Michigan jersey with his name on it. I guess he must've spent the quarter million from Eddie Martin on other things.
September 1st, 2011 at 8:31 PM ^
"Tuesdays With Morrie" will forever remain one of the worst books ever written.
September 1st, 2011 at 8:54 PM ^
A-Train. I tried to read it and did not even get half way through it.
Pure tear jerking crap. It was wrote to appeal to a certain segment that laps that stuff up.
Think...the Oprah crowd.
( No..i did not buy the book and thus help to en-rich him. My sister had it at her house and i picked it up one day out of boredom. No way i spend a dime on anything written by Albom. By the way...my sister said she could not finish it either)
September 1st, 2011 at 8:49 PM ^
who i despise more....Mitch Albom or Valenti.
Albom writes pap to make millions and Valenti is just so incredibly un-talented i cannot fathom how he keeps his job.
September 1st, 2011 at 9:17 PM ^
Mitch is a shrewd capitalist.
He knows what sells.
I'd bet his parents/aunts/uncles/friends parents/grandparents/etc subscribed to Readers Digest and he realized eighth grade schmaltzy writing sells.
He's been wildly successful following this recipe.
In the end, Bob's General Store was saved from the bank.
And the townsfolk lined the streets, held hands, waved the flag...and sang. And rejoiced.
September 1st, 2011 at 11:28 PM ^
It was at a wedding, 20 years ago anyway. He was pretty candid about admitting that his column was a regurgitated template that he was growing bored producing. He was actively searching for other ways to be challenged and find fulfillment. I think he still writes his column the way he does because it's popular, he gets paid very well to do it and it gives him time and a platform from which he can pursue his other vocational interests.
It doesn't surprise me that a high percentage of posters here are repulsed by his sentimentalism. But if you look at a more representative cross section of American culture, you're going to find a large demographic that eats it up.
Different strokes...