11/11: Coordinator Press Conference Questions

Borges, where do you think you'll be working next year?

Is there a specific reason you continue to run Fitz up the middle against a stacked box?

Does Gardner have freedom to check out of these run plays when he sees that the box is stacked?

Questions:

Boxers or briefs?

How many licks to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop?

What came first, the chicken or the egg?

Why does Michigan struggle so much in the running game?

The asnwers to each of these questions are equally likely to relate to Michigan football.

I mean with respect to boxers or briefs, wouldn't the answer be that it doesn't matter, because the expectation is for the position?  If one fails, it is a "next man up" mentality.

As for the tootsie roll pop, the answe is sure to be, "as many as it damn well takes.  We are going to keep licking until ww get to the center, even when it appears that licking is doing nothing because we are actually just licking the little white stick holding the candy part."

The chicken and the egg is obvious - as long as both of them continue execute as planned, play with requisite toughness, and have accountability to each other, the team and to poultry everywhere, we will be fine.  It doesn't matter which one came first.

And finally, as to the running game, "we have to coach better, work on the toughness element of the physicalness of this team, preach accountability and toughness and fundamentals and getting older - definitely getting older - and continue to lick the little white stick part of the pop while chacing the chicken wearing boxer-briefs.

What will you do in the next three weeks to save your job?

For Al:

"Do you use one of those sleep masks when you're napping up in the pressbox or does the shade pulled down on the window make it dark enough for you?"

This is coming from someone who is admittedly a bit of a football novice.  On Fishduck.com (excellent Oregon site that breaks down Chip Kelly's offense) they note that CHip Kelly often announces before the play (by formation) whether they will be running an outside zone read or inside zone read.  The overreaction by the defense creates holes, but could this possibly be what Borges is doing with formation?  Is it that uncommon for a defense to be able to figure out what the play is based on formation?

I am the furthest thing from a Borges apologist, just curious about this given the comments about defenses knowing his formations. 

What does it feel like to be out coached and out smarted by the opposing teams Defensive Coordinator, week after week? 

Does you wife make you sleep on the coach after a game like Nebraska's, because, "She can't even look at you" because of you grade school level performance?

My wife is not much of a football fan, but she knows your name and curses at the TV now, because of you idiotic play calling.  Can you feel her rage up the press box during the games? 

Serious question: Explanation on why the defensive backfield completely flipped. Countess out (injured or is leading D1 in interceptions and interception returns yards not good enough?) Wilson (senior starter for 3 years - good enough to play special teams)?

I would love to hear these answered. 

For Borges:

With your obvious game planning keyed in on banging your heads against a brick wall, what are your concerns with possible self-inflicted concussions?  Is there a plan in place to better execute long term brain damage?  Lastly, do your players often complain of frequent headaches, vision impairment and/or nausua?

What would you do for a Klondike Bar?

Predicted answer: Anything but bubble screens and quick slants. 

What the hell do you do during practice? Or better yet, how often do you attend practice? For Borges, obviously.