(Misopogon, if you can fix my tables, I'd appreciate it)

Alright class, I’m going to be your substitute teacher for the day, since Mr. Cook is taking some well-needed R & R. Consider this my Christmas present to you all, as I jump on the grenade that was the Ohio State game for the second year running.

Reviewing this game is like being Billy Pilgrim in Slaughterhouse Five looked at life, or like the plot of Lost ended up: the end is pre-determined because you’ve lived through it, and you are powerless to change it. You know what’s coming, but you have to sit through it anyway. I honestly didn’t really go into this game with a realistic expectation of victory. The team is/was too young, too small, too slow. Greater upsets have happened, but when I heard that Hagerup would be out, I just put my feet up to cheer for good plays and progress. Were there any? Let’s see. Michigan kicks off.

. LN DN Ds O Form RB TE WR D Form Type Play Player Yards . OSU31 1 10 I form 2 1 2 4-3 Pass Out Pryor 0 . Pryor turfs one about 5 yards short. Not much pressure. Sanzenbacher was open.                       . OSU31 2 10 Shotgun twins 1 0 4 4-3 Run Midline veer Pryor -2 . Blitz off the corner, good contain by Mouton (+1) and RVB (+1) to funnel back into the middle and tackle (+1)                       . OSU29 3 12 Shotgun 2-back 2 0 3 3-3-5 Pass Flare Roh 6 . I'm calling this a 3-3-5, even though one of the safeties is at LB depth. Dump-off pass, tackled by Roh short of the 1st.                       . Drive result: 3-and-out! OSU punt, 0-0, 13:47 1st Q.                       .                         . LN DN Ds O Form RB TE WR D Form Type Play Player Yards . OSU28 1 10 I form 2 1 2 4-3 Run Off tackle Mouton -1 . Good penetration by the line, good flow from the LBs. Seven players around the ball to make the tackle. (+1)                       . OSU27 2 11 Shotgun 1-back 1 0 4 3-3-5 Pass Circle Demens 4 . High snap, Pryor throw to the RB out of the backfield in front of the LBs. Demens (+1), tackle (+1) stops for a short gain.                       . OSU31 3 7 Shotgun 1-back 1 1 3 3-3-5 Pass TE cross Kovacs 6 . Shallow crossing route, good tackle by Kovacs (+1) to cause a fumble, but OOB. Mouton playing pretty soft, but staying on the 1st down line.                       . Drive result: 3and out #2! OSU punt, 0-0, 7:26 1st Q.                       .                         . LN DN Ds O Form RB TE WR D Form Type Play Player Yards . OSU9 1 10 Shotgun 1-back 1 1 3 4-3 Run Zone Read Gordon 1

. Good contain by the LBs, allowing C Gordon (+1) to make a tackle for short gain.                       . OSU10 2 9 I-form 2 1 2 3-3-5 Pass Play action screen RVB 4 . Corners playing tight, making 5 on the LOS. Can I (+1) pressure on a screen? Good job by RVB (+1) and Kovacs(+1) to stay on the RB and hold this short.                       . OSU14 3 5 Shotgun 5 wide 0 0 5 3-3-5 Pass TE Seam Roh 38 . Lots of hand-waving by the D before the snap. Pryor steps up like he's going to scramble, causing Roh (-1) to bite and leave Sanzenbacher wide open for lots. I'll throw Vinopal a (-1) for maybe not covering the middle.                       . M47 1 10 ???       ??? Pass Rollout WR out? Demens 8 . Miss the start of the play for the replay of the last one. Pryor rolls out and hits Posey for a few, tackled by Demens and C Gordon tackle +1                       . M39 2 2 I-form 2 1 2 3-3-5 Run Off-tackle Demens 1 . Straightforward run, good form tackle by Demens (+1), tackle +1                       . M38 3 1 Full-house 3 2 0 3-3-5         . 3-3-5 with LBs on the line. Mouton calls timeout. OSU is in a 2 FB, 1 RB formation. I'll just call it "Christmas Tree."                       . M38 3 1 Offset I 2 3 0 3-3-5 Pass Play action Out Rodgers 21 . Play action, coverage is decent, but Rodgers (-1) can't catch up to the Pryor floater in time to knock it down. I think that's "trickeration" for Tressel.                       . M18 1 10 Christmas tree 3 2 0 3-3-5 Run Dive Mouton 1 . Defense is totally running around before the snap. Mouton (+1) comes flying in through the gap to get Herron for a short gain.                       . M17 2 9 Shotgun 1-back 1 2 2 3-3-5 Run Sweep Demens 5(-10) . OSU unbalances the line, with both TE on the right side. Great flow to run Seine OOB. Flag for Holding. Roh would probably have tackled near the LOS.                       . M26 2 19 Shotgun 5 wide 0 0 5 3-3-5 Run QB draw Demens 9 . Four-wide to the left. Pryor scrambles/designed draw. Couple missed tackles (-1) gets 9 yards. Demens finally makes the tackle.                       . M17 3 10 Offset Ace 1 1 3 3-3-5 Pass Slant Avery 0

. Posey ran a slant, Pryor threw an out. Avery was the nearest player, but not much chance for a pick.                       . Drive result: FG, 0-3, 14:52 2nd Q. The whole drive could be RPS (-1), since the defense was jumping around most of the time.                       .                         . LN DN Ds O Form RB TE WR D Form Type Play Player Yards . M35 1 10 Shotgun 1-back 1 1 3 4-3 Run Zone Read Kovacs 4 . Michigan scrapes, but Demens (-1) misses the first tackle. Slows Pryor down enough for Kovacs to wrap up.                       . M31 2 6 Shotgun 1-back 1 1 3 3-3-5 Pass Rollout Out Avery 0 . Rollout out again, Avery is playing soft. Would have been a catch, but Pryor throws it short.                       . M31 3 6 Shotgun 5 wide 0 0 5 3-3-5 Pass Improv Vinopal? 13 . 4 wide to one side again, all LBs on the LOS, corner blitz RPS +1, pressure +1, but scrambles and complete for the first. Coverage -1. Fiddlesticks.                       . M19 1 10 Shotgun 1-back 1 2 2 3-3-5 Pass Scramble Pick 'em 9 . Shoot me. Pryor rolls right, and is contained by Demens, reversed field and outruns the pursuit of RVB. Now it's Kovacs vs Pryor and a lineman, but Pryor runs OOB.                       . M7 1 G Shotgun 5 wide 0 0 5 3-3-5 Pass Post Kovacs 7 . FS rolled up, leaving no one deep between the hashes. Kovacs (and every one else) playing in the endzone, Sanzenbacher catches between the D. coverage -1                       . Drive result: Touchdown, 10-0, 10:29 2nd Q No penalty for making the O after the TD.                       .                         . LN DN Ds O Form RB TE WR D Form Type Play Player Yards . OSU37 1 10 Shotgun 1-back 1 1 3 3-3-5 Pass Scramble Banks 2 . Pryor can't find anyone to throw to, coverage +1, scrambles and is taken down by Banks with the other linemen nearby.                       . OSU39 2 8 Ace 1 2 2 3-3-5 Run Sweep C Gordon -3

. Weird formation with a TE, H-back and slot receiver all to the left. Michigan has down linemen in the A gaps. Gordon +1 and Avery +1 string out and tacke +1 for loss. Roh prevents the cutback, so +1 for him too.                       . OSU42 3 11 Shotgun 1-back 1 0 4 3-3-5 Pass TE seam Roh 20 . LBs don't drop deep enough, allowing Sanzenbacher to make a good catch for the first.Minus to Roh or Mouton. I think Kovacs misses the tackle, but trips him anyway.                       . M38 1 10 Shotgun 1-back 1 2 2 3-3-5 Run Zone read Mouton 4 . Too many guys, not enough defenders RPS -1, good tackle by Mouton +1                       . M34 2 6 I-form 2 1 2 4-3 Run Counter Kovacs 1 . Kovacs +1 comes flying up into the hole to tackle at the LOS. +1 to the line for making a mess of the playside.                       . M33 3 5 Shotgun 1-back 1 2 2 3-3-5 Pass Stand there open Coverage 33 . Michigan blitzes Roh from the edge, Pryor runs away from him and Patterson is the nearest defender to Posey. -1 to Demens for not being nearby, freshman safeties can't get there in time. I don't think the dive was unnecessary celebration, but if they were warned about the first O, that was it.                       . Drive result: toasted DBs, Touchdown. 7-24, 3:06 2nd Q. Where is everybody, if they're only rushing 3, why does a DE cover a WR?                       .                         . LN DN Ds O Form RB TE WR D Form Type Play Player Yards . Video doesn't have the last 3 minutes of the half. After OSU recovered the fumble, OSU got down to 1st and goal. RVB sacked Pryor on 2nd and 7, then Kovacs interecepted to end the half. Darn it, I really wanted video.                       .                         . LN DN Ds O Form RB TE WR D Form Type Play Player Yards . OSU30 1 10 I-form 2 1 2 4-3 Run Draw Demens 6 . OSU quickly to the line, previous play is not reviewed. Good tackle by Demens and Avery (tackle +1).                       . OSU36 2 4 I-form 2 1 2 3-3-5 Pass Rollout stop Rodgers 11 . Pryor rolls out and hits Posey. Posey outruns Rodgers (-1) for YAC, Demens comes in to clean up. Ball is stripped, but Posey is down                       . M43 1 10 Ace 1 2 2 4-3 Pass Playaction Rollout scramble Avery 4

. Pryor rolls out, good coverage (+1), so he keeps and is forced out after a short gain by Avery.                       . M39 2 6 Ace 1 2 2 4-3 Run Off-tackle Kovacs 2 . Toss to Herron, tackled by Martin +1 and Kovacs +1. Tackle +1. I'll mention more about the D-line in the wrap-up.                       . M37 3 4 Shotgun 1-back 1 0 4 3-3-5 Pass Flare Mouton 5 . Michigan blitzes, pressure +1, Pryor dumps off to Seine who gets the first and run out by Mouton.                       . M32 1 10 I-form 2 1 2 3-3-5 Run Draw Demens 32 . Second big play of the day. Demens (-1) misses the tackle in the hole, although you could probably call a hold. Avery misses the last tackle between Herron and the endzone. OSU gets another unsportsmanlike for making the O.                       . Drive result: TD, 7-31, 13:34 3rd Q                       .                         . LN DN Ds O Form RB TE WR D Form Type Play Player Yards . OSU2 1 10 I-form Big 1 2 2 4-3 Run Off-tackle Roh, pick 'em 98(-19) . Roh misses the first tackle and takes out Kovacs, Vinopal misses, Rodgers can't catch up and it's off to the races. It's really not that bad of a play except for tackling -1, if Roh or Demens wrap up, it's a 2 yard gain. Penalty saves the TD.                       . M19 1 10 I-form Big 1 2 2 4-3 Run Off-tackle Kovacs 0 . Exact same play. Roh plugs the hole, causing a bounce-out. Good tackle by Kovacs (+1), tackle +1 for no gain                       . M19 2 10 I-form 1 1 3 3-3-5 Pass Rollout Pryor 0 . Pryor rolls out, nobody open coverage +1, pressure -1, throws it away.                       . M19 3 10 Shotgun 1-back 1 0 4 4-3 Pass Flare Rodgers 0 . Corner blitz by Rodgers RPS +1, causes Pryor to throw a fast dumpoff that's dropped. Demens +1 for following the RB on the pass.                       . Drive result: FG, 7-34, 9:19 3rd Q

Mercy. OSU runs out the clock and punts twice. I don't think there's anything more to be gained by charting the rest of this.

So, Chart?

Great, I’ve got to do Brian’s internal monologue now?

Yes, now make with the chart

There will be no chart for the following reasons: 1. Just doing the play chart is hard enough. Give Brian more money for doing this. 2. Since the chart is subjective, my opinion on people’s performance is largely worthless to compare to anything. I think it was net positive for tackling, probably slightly negative for coverage, RPS slightly negative, with Demens, Kovacs, Avery, Roh and Gordon being mentioned most often.

Alright then, do you have any opinion on coaches, scheme, players or anything?

I think that except for the OSU drive in the second quarter where OSU went hurry-up and the defense seemed to scramble around, they really played pretty solid. I mean, one kickoff for touchdown, one touchdown from a shanked punt, and maybe two blown coverages are the majority of the points. Comparing OSU’s defense to Michigan’s has some validity. I got to the point that I was typing in 3-4 before even starting to watch the play. Aside from goalline, there were only a few instances where OSU played anything other than base 3-4, with one LB standing on the line strongside, and one LB lined up over the slot receiver. That, compared to what Michigan did/does, says a lot. While I won’t go so far as to say that the 3-3-5 can’t work in the Big Ten, I will say that there seems to be a lot to learn to run it, and that would be hard for young players to pick up. Now, I don’t know if a simple 4-3 cover 2 would be effective, simply because you have to have the players to put into positions. I’ll give the coaching staff the benefit of the doubt and assume that they looked at the talent on the roster, the available spots for the defense, and decided that trying to keep the opposing offense guessing is/was a key to victory.

Wow, that was long. So, fire GERG or what?

I may have an opinion on that, but ultimately it’s pointless to argue about it, since I don’t have a vote. The defense held OSU to 3-and-outs to start the game and ended three drives with field goals. Look, it’s not world-beating, but it’s a far cry from the Illinois game already. I’m maybe not excited, but maybe cautiously optimistic?

+1’s for everyone!