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MGoShirt Alert - Day 10

By Six Zero — August 21st, 2009 at 8:32 AM — 114 comments
Filed under:
  • MGoShirt Alert+MGoBlogStore+six zero ended WWII with vector graphics+T-shirts

“Not the New Math, but the New New Math”

This is the tenth entry of the 2009 MGoShirt Alert, a design project that will enable MgoBlog readers to vote for upcoming designs in the brand spankin’ new MGoBlogStore.


It's no secret that, like many of you, one of my favorite players to don the maize and blue was LaMarr Woodley.  Watching him wreck opposing quarterbacks was like watching Picasso paint, Gretzky pass, or Anna Kournikova, well, lay on a beach.  I've always had a thing for the defensive end position, and Woodley was clearly one of the best in recent memory.  Even if you hate the Steelers, you had to feel proud of our boy at the end of this year's Super Bowl if you're a true Michigan man.

And now we have this new guy.  Kinda goofy off the field, apparently likes doing interviews without shoes.  But when he gets out there he's all bid'ness, and is a threat to any offense we play.  Brandon Lee Graham.  Last year's Bo Shembechler Team MVP winner.  Already tied for 8th on the all-time sacks chart, he has the chance to be something we haven't seen since, well, Woodley.  Is it an unfair comparison?  I don't think so-- if Graham is productive this year he'll be a force that can change games, and a surefire first round pick.  There's even talk of him breaking the single-season sack record... discuss amongst yourselves.


Time to vote.  What do you guys think?

pollcode.com free polls
What do you think of MgoShirt #10?
Five Stars Four Stars Three Stars Two Stars One Star   

***** Five Stars:  Graham gets 25 sacks, breaking Terrell Suggs NCAA record.
**** Four Stars:   Turns in 15 sacks, breaking the UM single-season record.
*** Three Stars:  A respectable but disappointing 9 1/2 sacks.
** Two Stars:  Turns in a Gabe Watson-esque senior season, drafted on 2nd day.
* One Star:  Graham gets h-- no, I can't even put it in print.

_________________________________________________________________

For the weekend, I need your collective help.  Once again in the spirit of interactive democracy, I'm opening up a design for ideas from the MGoCommunity.  I wanted to do a retro graphic shirt, and we settled on this design featuring a very Ozzie and Harriet-esque 50's couple who have received some troubling news:


Brian and I have been going back on this design for awhile now with varying degrees of success. So, why not LET YOU WRITE THE JOKE???!!
Yes, here's your chance to leave your mark on Monday's shirt design.  We need a response (punch-line) from the dad, to go in the "A" area above.  You may also choose to include some sort of tagline, to go in the "B" area below the graphic.  I don't have to remind you that vulgarity, while sure to make this shirt pure win, may preclude your idea from becoming a mass production apparel piece.

For every entry submitted, please include an A. _____________ line, and a B. _____________ line if you'd like as well.

We'll leave this open for comments over the course of the weekend, and if a clear-cut winner emerges from the fog then you can expect it on Monday's shirt design.  Otherwise I'll take a look at a few of the best and we'll make a decision from there.  Until then, see you next time for another exciting edition of-- MGoShirt Alert!

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August 21st, 2009 at 8:40 AM | Like the simplicity of Graham shirt ... (Score:1)
PhillipFulmersPants
PhillipFulmersPants's picture
Joined: 01/06/2009
MGoPoints: 1170

A couple thoughts

A: But can we afford the crayons, Martha?

or

A: Imagine that. Our Yorkshire terrier is going to college!

Okay, kind of lame. Will be fun to read the tons of responses you'll get

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:46 AM | I like... (Score:1)
umfan
umfan's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 130

I like this idea. Best one yet IMO.

UMfan. GO BLUE

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August 21st, 2009 at 8:45 AM | Shirt (Score:1)
Bleedin9Blue
Bleedin9Blue's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 1763

I like this shirt a good deal more than some of the previous ones. Good job. It's easy to read, to the point, but will only be immediately understood by fans with some knowledge (sorry drunk sorority girls that come in during the second quarter and leave during the third, you probably won't "get" this shirt).

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August 21st, 2009 at 8:52 AM | A and B (Score:1)
Hemlock Philosopher
Hemlock Philosopher's picture
Joined: 02/12/2009
MGoPoints: 1278

A. Awesome, I just bought stock In Skoal!

B. We're RICH!

Brewer. Wolverine.

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:55 AM | Lots of these are great, but (Score:1)
Still in AA
Joined: 08/07/2009
MGoPoints: 808

Lots of these are great, but your "A" just made me laugh out loud.

Let's eat Grandpa.

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August 21st, 2009 at 8:52 AM | A. (Score:1)
Cosmic Blue
Cosmic Blue's picture
Joined: 10/13/2008
MGoPoints: 183

Now if only we could get little Jimmy pottitrained (sp?)

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:06 AM | That's the correct spelling (Score:1)
PhillipFulmersPants
PhillipFulmersPants's picture
Joined: 01/06/2009
MGoPoints: 1170

at OSU

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:11 AM | High back-fire potential (Score:1)
MCalibur
MCalibur's picture
Joined: 07/16/2009
MGoPoints: 2181

This joke could be contorted to imply that Jimmy is uber smart and made it into the prestigious Ohio State Program for Prancing Pamper Prodigies

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:04 AM | 2 ideas (Score:1)
Bleedin9Blue
Bleedin9Blue's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 1763

Here are my 3 ideas:

  • 1
    • A. What do you think about this John?
    • B. John Cooper: Greatest OSU coach ever.
  • 2
    • A. What do you think Glenn?
    • B. Glenn "Bo" Schembechler went to OSU... but stayed at Michigan
  • 3
    • A. What do you think Glenn?
    • B. Glenn "Bo" Schembechler: 11-9-1

Note: I know that neither Cooper nor Bo actually graduated from OSU so it doesn't work perfectly.

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:03 AM | A. Thats great honey, but (Score:1)
ronmexico
ronmexico's picture
Joined: 11/19/2008
MGoPoints: 453

A. Thats great honey, but should we be going through other people's trash?
B. Overly Saturated Underachievers

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:06 AM | Shirt (Score:1)
mgovictors23
mgovictors23's picture
Joined: 05/03/2009
MGoPoints: 91

I like it, it's simple but yet other Michigan fans will understand it. I would give it a 5.

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:09 AM | - (Score:1)
Beware the Otter
Beware the Otter's picture
Joined: 06/19/2009
MGoPoints: 491

A. He's going to want to celebrate. Hide the Natty Ice.

B. The Ohio State University of America

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:19 AM | Like you B (Score:1)
PhillipFulmersPants
PhillipFulmersPants's picture
Joined: 01/06/2009
MGoPoints: 1170

Pryor gaffe works too ... The University of Ohio State

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:20 AM | Shirt (Score:1)
99bobcats
99bobcats's picture
Joined: 08/20/2008
MGoPoints: 479

How about nothing in A since his expression says enough.

B: PARENT FAIL!

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:23 AM | (3 on the shirt) (Score:1)
Seth
Seth's picture
Joined: 10/14/2008
MGoPoints: 48336

A. And you said his comments on Youtube would never get him anywhere.

A. Okay, Linda, you were right; we should have had the abortion.

(Blogger alias: "Misopogon") This team is under construction. We thank you for your patience.

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:42 AM | Abortion Jokes (Score:1)
QB Waggle
QB Waggle's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 170

Inappropriate as they may be, I usually laugh.

A: Is it too late for the abortion?
B: Pro-Choice

A: !
B: So easy a cave man can do it.

A: If you need me I'll be taking a bath with the toaster.
B: How to get away with patricide

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:47 AM | Nice (Score:1)
Bleedin9Blue
Bleedin9Blue's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 1763

I like the first two that you put.

I think the third one could be better if you changed B to "OSU: Leading cause of patricide since 1870".

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:23 AM | A. Well this is a swell Plan (Score:1)
Toomey
Joined: 11/05/2008
MGoPoints: 102

A. Well this is a swell Plan B if Columbus State doesn't work out!

B. Plan B Fail x2

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:26 AM | A: He'll finally be able to (Score:1)
farside286
Joined: 01/17/2009
MGoPoints: 491

A: He'll finally be able to become a [enter job here].

B: Educating Ohio's finest since 1870.

I am having trouble figuring out which job would be the most degrading to Ohio State fans... any ideas?

Class of '11 B.S.E (E.E.)
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August 21st, 2009 at 9:31 AM | B: Maybe he can get that (Score:1)
Magnus
Magnus's picture
Joined: 07/17/2008
MGoPoints: 27477

A: Maybe he can get that newfangled degree in Golf!

...or...

A: You mean he actually had to apply?

B: OSU: Using admissions standards since 2003.

Twitter - Recruiting Update: May 20

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:32 AM | It would be better as "And he (Score:1)
joeyb
joeyb's picture
Joined: 10/12/2008
MGoPoints: 11304

It would be better as "And he never even applied!"

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:32 AM | The Winner: (Score:1)
Big Boutros
Big Boutros's picture
Joined: 07/08/2008
MGoPoints: 8004

A: Oh brah I'm totally skeeved that you just told me that because I hate Ohio State like nobody's business

B: Michigan Rules Hooray

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:35 AM | Shirt (Score:1)
Bleedin9Blue
Bleedin9Blue's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 1763

Two more ideas:

A. I have no son.

OR

A. I have no son.
B. OSU: Ripping families apart since 1870

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:36 AM | A and B (Score:1)
Route66
Route66's picture
Joined: 10/15/2008
MGoPoints: 1343

A: WHAT!?

B: The child support will be in the mail

 "Run and armpunt that, homeboy." -Brian 10/22/12

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:47 AM | A & B (Score:1)
MichIOE01
MichIOE01's picture
Joined: 11/19/2008
MGoPoints: 46

A: At least he'll have somewhere to go if he gets rejected from community college

B: OSU - the redneck backup plan

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:55 AM | Beat me to it (Score:1)
V-Link
V-Link's picture
Joined: 12/08/2008
MGoPoints: 107

A: Let's still mail the U of Phoenix application
B: Family Valyous

All-City '66, scored 4 TDs in one game!

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August 21st, 2009 at 9:58 AM | A: He will always shave (Score:1)
CG
Joined: 09/13/2008
MGoPoints: -116

A: He will always shave Tempe.

B: IJJS.

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:11 AM | A: So that's why we are (Score:1)
tomkenic000
tomkenic000's picture
Joined: 11/18/2008
MGoPoints: 95

A: So that's why we are holding this piece of toilet paper

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:21 AM | joke (Score:1)
MGoScene
MGoScene's picture
Joined: 02/26/2009
MGoPoints: 310

A: but honey, i always thought that was where dreams went to die!
B: an ohio state university. other stuff happens here, too.

some are scared of being misfits; I'm afraid of fitting in

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:27 AM | A: FML. B: 57-42-6 (Score:1)
His Dudeness
His Dudeness's picture
Joined: 11/24/2008
MGoPoints: 13560

A: FML.
B: 57-42-6

or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing.

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:28 AM | A. Thats great honey, our 35 (Score:1)
ronmexico
ronmexico's picture
Joined: 11/19/2008
MGoPoints: 453

A. Thats great honey, our 35 year old baby has grown up so fast!
B. Ohio State University, yes the same state that has Cedar Point.

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:29 AM | A few more ideas (Score:1)
Beegs
Beegs's picture
Joined: 08/17/2009
MGoPoints: 102

A. Great, sis.

A. Great, I was worried he he was going to have to go to college instead.

A. Our boy? Okay, let me know when he becomes a man and we'll send him UM.

A. Cool, that will go well with his scarlet and gray sun dress.

The Free Press is dead to me

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:07 AM | Nice (Score:1)
Bleedin9Blue
Bleedin9Blue's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 1763

I especially like the first one, it's very simple (two words in fact) but quite funny.

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:09 AM | Beegs (Score:1)
Lane8
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 2

"A: Great, sis." is the leader in the clubhouse for my vote.

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:14 AM | Beegs wins hands down. (Score:1)
mikefromaa
mikefromaa's picture
Joined: 08/17/2009
MGoPoints: 300

I would rephraise it a tad, but yours is definitely the funniest.

Maybe tweak it to
A. Great news sis!
B. Do you think he'll go to college after that?

May T-Force Be With Us.

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August 21st, 2009 at 1:13 PM | +1 for incest. (Score:1)
WildcatBlue
WildcatBlue's picture
Joined: 08/09/2008
MGoPoints: 496

Maybe a twist: That's great, sis! You can read?

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August 21st, 2009 at 1:47 PM | Nice refinements (Score:1)
Beegs
Beegs's picture
Joined: 08/17/2009
MGoPoints: 102

Excellent...definitely like the refinements better than the original. "Great, sis, you can read?" kills two birds with one stone. Love it.

The Free Press is dead to me

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:50 AM | Ok. (Score:1)
wolverine1987
wolverine1987's picture
Joined: 07/07/2008
MGoPoints: 2928

A. "it's down OSU or ITT. What do you think honey?

B. OSU. THE Ohio better than community college school.

"Everyone gets dumped Gabe. Let me give you some advice: a little coverup on your Adams Apple will make it appear smaller. Which will make you appear less like a transvestite." 

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August 21st, 2009 at 10:59 AM | Well (Score:1)
GatrHatr
Joined: 05/02/2009
MGoPoints: 11

A: Well, he would look good with a Mullet.

B: OSU: Keeping Wild Turkey in business since 1870

"Should I do it, should I not? Then I crossed the goal line and was like Fuck It! and I did it." - Desmond Howard

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:02 AM | I'll Try (Score:1)
BleedingBlue
BleedingBlue's picture
Joined: 07/25/2008
MGoPoints: 1995

No. 1

A: "I didn't know he drank that much!"

B: "The University of Ohio State: Destroying Livers Since 1870"

No. 2

A: "I guess we'll have to accept he peaked in high school."

B: "The University of Ohio State: Uneducating Students Since 1870"
or
B: "The University of Ohio State: Making People Dumber Since 1870"

'Murica & Footbaw: That's what Michigan Does

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:05 AM | you could change it to "I (Score:1)
farside286
Joined: 01/17/2009
MGoPoints: 491

you could change it to "I guess we'll have to accept he peaked in middle school." or even elementary school since Ohio State grads don't know how to multiply.

Class of '11 B.S.E (E.E.)
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August 21st, 2009 at 11:01 AM | Shirt (Score:1)
chally
Joined: 11/25/2008
MGoPoints: 294

I like the shirt. Simple and clean, with a clever message. I gave it 4 stars.

My only issue in purchasing it is that its wearability depends on the season. Woodley led one of our best defenses during one of our best seasons this decade, so wearing his shirt was badass. But even if Graham sets the sack record this year, I'm unlikely to wear this shirt out if the defense overall is as poor as last year. It's hard to brag about the skill of one player when the rest of the team is getting torched by Purdue.

By contrast, shirts like the slot ninja (my current favorite) or hello heisman (second) will presumably be wearable for years without regard to the team's actual success. Just my $0.02.

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:08 AM | A. Lady why are you showing (Score:1)
ronmexico
ronmexico's picture
Joined: 11/19/2008
MGoPoints: 453

A. Lady why are you showing me a picture of your son doing "the brains".

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:09 AM | A & B (Score:1)
fritZ
fritZ's picture
Joined: 03/21/2009
MGoPoints: 30

A: But what's he going to do the second 2 years

B: Ohio State: The Big 10's Community College

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:10 AM | Meaner than I like to be... (Score:1)
Still in AA
Joined: 08/07/2009
MGoPoints: 808

A: I'll still love ya, Corky
B: Life Goes On

Let's eat Grandpa.

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:16 AM | Graham shirt is pretty cool 3* (Score:1)
captainbatman
Joined: 10/27/2008
MGoPoints: -2818

A: We'll tell the neighbors he got sent to prison.

B: OSU vs. Prison: At least four years in prison provide an education

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:18 AM | Caption (Score:1)
wexgoblue
Joined: 07/01/2008
MGoPoints: 17

A: Ha Ha!! No Seriously, What does it say?

B: Every parents' worst nightmare

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:18 AM | A: I suppose knowing Math is (Score:1)
ameed
Joined: 07/01/2008
MGoPoints: 188

A: I suppose knowing Math is overrated anyways.

B: "I went to ohio state. I dont know that much." - Patricia Heaton OSU Class of 1980

Excellence is Good

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August 21st, 2009 at 2:58 PM | Good (Score:1)
GoBlue6565
Joined: 08/21/2009
MGoPoints: 0

It's nice to bring actual quotes into it.

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August 21st, 2009 at 11:22 AM | Epic thread. (Score:1)
Rush N Attack
Rush N Attack's picture
Joined: 07/07/2008
MGoPoints: 526

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