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this week in unintentionally grim-sounding recruiting headlines
This feature highlights some of the more famous personalities here at MGoBlog and beyond. Without pulling back the infamous veil of blog anonymity, we’ll get to know some of your favorite posters better and possibly shed some light on their definition of why it’s so darn Great, To Be, A Michigan Wolverine.
CLICK HERE TO VIEW PREVIOUS EDITIONS OF MGOPROFILE
(Scroll down to the MGoProfile section of the User-Curated HOF).
SIX QUESTIONS WITH PURPLESTUFF
I like to think of him as MGoBlog’s own international man of mystery. He comes in, comes, hard, and then is out. He’s been here for many regimes, and been able to argue for all of them. Personal story, he was one of my first knockdown, drag out MGoFights. But quickly realized we have a hell of a lot more in common than any differences. I like to think he’s one of the most unique characters on the boards. And no one really knows who he really is. But now we can find out. Without further ado, PurpleStuff:
1. OK, I already have mods that think with me interviewing you, this is going to be the first MGoProfile to be censored, as it will obviously be the dirtiest. Let's not disappoint. What's the latest you've heard on the sexual tiger that is Les Miles?
Sadly, I think ole' Les is just about tuckered out. He's been around the block, and from his "lost years" living at the Mansion with Jimmy Caan to his legendary orgies on the set of "Golden Girls", he's seen it all (Little known fact: the first recorded use of the term MILF was by Les Miles in reference to Estelle Getty). I figure once all the Fanning girls and the cast of "Modern Family" reach the age of consent, he'll hang up his spurs and just concentrate on coaching football. At that time expect LSU to win five or six national titles in a row.
(EDITED FOR CONTENT INAPPROPIATE FOR BRIAN’S MOM)
Where do you think that sense of humor comes from, where the boundaries of good taste is a line tightly walked? And how do you walk it on MGoBlog? Because I don't think people realize how often you probably hold back and say...hmmm...maybe too much. (Or maybe that's just me).
I'm certainly dirtier in real life than I am on the Internet, so your instincts are sound. Really, I'm just trying to bring joy into the lives of strangers, much like this good Samaritan:
And to round it out- "PurpleStuff"....so is that as dirty as it sounds? Or is it just me? Or just you? What IS this purple-like substance?
Can't take credit for this one, I just hate Sunny D:
2. You seem to have taken a unique stance (at least at an earlier point than a lot of people) as a hardline defender of Rich Rod who even in the beginning never let that cloud your feelings against or for Hoke. At least coaching wise, you've been a strong defender of each. Without opening up the whys and hows and the who got screwed's, how did you balance the positives, the fresh take on each and not holding any resentments about one towards the other? I think most people have come around to that by now, but I think you were one of the first who were in die hard support of the last guy, but able to look at the new guy and see positives (not better or worse, just good in his own right).
First off, Coach Hoke is a loveable Teddy Bear. I don't think it is possible not to like him. As far as positives go, bringing along Al Borges was a big one for me (I remember his UCLA teams vividly and the guy knows how to coach a big play offense when the parts are in place). Obviously it is super early to evaluate the direction of the program, but the impact guys like Frank Clark and Raymon Taylor have made already is encouraging. Folks have freaked out a bit about some of our recent recruits, and I wouldn't be surprised to see them mistaken (Willie Henry > Ondre Pipkins, there I said it), but if Coach Hoke is at worst Lloyd Carr with a more inviting personality and an unlimited budget, then the program is on very solid ground. And jumping to the next question, it sucks balls having Rich Rodriguez in the same division as USC.
Hey, no peeking ahead! Alright. You also seem to have a team #2 in USC. I'm pretty sure you live out there...did you go to that school for a degree too (in addition to Michigan)? And how does that work in the Rose Bowl? Some people with cross degrees root for one or the other, some root for both...give us some insight into being a part of two schools that don't particularly like each other (athletically), because I'm sure you're not alone in that arena. How does being a Michigan fan work with your USC friends?
You're right, I went to law school at USC. Love both schools immensely. Michigan is always #1 when the two meet though, and I've had a couple sad rides home from the Rose Bowl as a result. Never had a problem with my Trojan friends, though that could certainly change if we ever beat them. I do make my annual Vegas March Madness trip with a group of SC buddies, and they did seem a tad alarmed this year by my repeated pelvic thrusts whenever Mitch McGary threw one down against mediocre mid-major competition. But they were quite pleased when Trey Burke dashed the dreams of the chubby girls from Kansas who refused to have an "Eyes Wide Shut" style orgy with us.
I've never really understood the hate some UM folks show towards SC (or vice versa), especially considering how rarely we play them. Obviously losing sucks, but the schools have way more in common than they have differences.
So a law degree….guess that leads into the “What do you do for a living now?” question…
3. What do you like to do for fun?
I could say gourmet meals, fine wine, and great works of literature, but all that shit is just a distraction between football games.
4. I’m sure that’s a position that’s completely relatable on MGoBlog. Describe the perfect meal.
Seared NY strip steak with a nicely charred crust and a beautiful medium rare interior. Washed down with a nice Malbec or Chateaunuf-du-Pape.
5. I think you’ve just classed up the next “What are you drinking?” thread. Can you explain why you are a Michigan fan?
I think once you move into the dorms and hear the band practicing The Victors out your window it is impossible not to be hooked.
6. Who’s your all-time favorite Wolverine?
He's not quite there yet, but I'm pretty sure it is going to be Nik Stauskas by the time he graduates. One game remotely like the one he had against Florida and I'll fall in love forever.
So if nothing else, I’m pretty sure you didn’t know Purplestuff likes dreamy Canadians. (But then, really, who doesn’t?) But that’s PurpleStuff, a unique vision on the Blog. Much like the fine wines he drinks, it’s an acquired taste that gets richer over time. And I certainly don’t think he disappointed with his original take on how to answer the questions here. But we have a lot of unique characters, and so little time before the season starts. So keep your eyes on this spot for more coming soon; same Bat-Time, same Bat-Channel!
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Really enjoyed this one. Good work guys.
and I can't stop staring (and laughing) of that GIF with Pellini/Miles/Tebow.
Figured it would be, but it met some pretty damn high expectations. I'll go out on a limb and guess the "edited for content not appropriate for Brian's mom" section included an additional 42 questions and 1,600 words in response. Just a hunch.
Gotta love a man who comes, hard
We all know the punch line. I'm refusing to say it... that's... no... that's what... NO... that's what she... STOP IT!
Sorry, the punch line is too obvious in this situation and shouldn't be said.
It just wouldn't be as good as I want it to be...
He said "BUST"....
And "COMES" ....
And "HARD" ....
He said "SPANKS"....
lost you at the part where you said USC and Michigan had a lot in common. Uh....
Happy he was profiled; one of my favourite posters on this board. Cheers
Thanks for doing the heavy lifting on this one, M-Wolverine. Just got back from my visionquest through the American southwest where I was forced to survive the wrath of Les Miles in the form of thunder, floods, power outages, hungry 'skeeters, carne adovada and rest-stop bathrooms with subpar TP (definitely in that order), as well as the kinds of creepy talkative dudes who seem to live their entire lives within the confines of our national park system.
It was a welcome respite to come home and find my internet greatness finally honored.