Mad Lib! [Comrades / Friends of the Revolution / Proletariat brothers], Unite! The [money stained hands of capitalism / cowardly bourgeosie / makers of substandard Vodka] and their [false campaign of imperialist propaganda / corrupt hearts / capitalist lapdogs] cannot [quell our revolution / overtake the people’s hearts / drink all of our Vodka] !! Insert picture of [Rodriguez as Stalin / Barwis as Mao / Will Campbell with a non-Thor people’s hammer / Randall from Clerks wearing a CCCP hockey jersey] Rumors of the previous year’s [less than adequate performance / minor setback on the road to true communism / failure of the new regime] Have been spread by [enemies of the revolution / shameless bourgeosie / misinformed unicorns]. Take heart!! These liars and thieves will be sent to [Siberia / the darkest Gulag / East Lansing], And their ramblings will be proven wrong! For next season our [people’s army / revolutionary zealots / glorious proletariat] will [purge the capitalist insurgents / sympathize with the people / fix a random number of tractors / increase production at the exclamation point factory !!!!!!!] Thereby [proving the worth of the revolution / sucking out the festering rot in their souls / winning more games for the motherland]. Unicorns rule! Far more than [insert your favorite mythical creature] To conclude [Comrades / Brothers / Friends of the revolution], Comrade Rodriguez will rise up [from the muck of the Russian Steppe / to heights undreamt of by the shameless capitalists / like Ivan Drago in Rocky IV] And conquer all! [Viva le revolucion! / Death to dirty capitalists / Drink Wolverine brand vodka!] Lather, rinse, repeat.