Low-Rated Recruit Prospect disappointed by his university hostess

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RivalryScout.com - Los Angeles, CA -

Low-rated recruiting prospect John Q. Footballplayer said today he was depressed to learn that star ratings did in fact matter. Footballplayer was invited to campus for the recruiting weekend after top prospect Footballwinner, his cousin, demanded it. Upon arriving on the USC campus for his recruiting visit, Footballplayer said he was excited, among other things, to meet his recruiting weekend hostess.

"A couple of really big name guy were there with me, and coach Kiffin introduced them to their weekend hostesses right away. Just wonderful girls, really. They seemed very nice. I do worry about their future back problems, though", said Footballplayer. "Anyhow, I was really excited to meet mine, because, well, you know… I mean, my cousin’s hostess was already leading him towards the university hot tubs.”

 

So it should be obvious that when Kiffin approached Footballplayer to present his recruiting weekend hostess, Footballplayer was expecting a lot. The result, he says, left something lacking.

 

Footballplayer's Recruiting Hostess

 

“I’m trying to take it in stride”, said Footballplayer. “I am an OL prospect, so maybe he felt I needed a little bulk. In reality though, it’s pretty hard to miss the message.”

 

Still, though, though depressed, Footballplayer is carefully reviewing his options. He stated that between his two offers, cupcakes from USC and the full-ride at Michigan State, he wasn’t sure which was more attractive.

 

“I’m glad I visited Michigan State first. If I took my USC Recruiting Hostess to the MSU campus, the girl I met there would’ve tried to eat it.”

 

Footballplayer then stopped for a moment, before suddenly announcing a plan to start a BBW/Food Fetish pornographic business in East Lansing, MI.

Recruiting
Joke
hostess

Comments

Bronco648

January 19th, 2010 at 1:34 PM ^

LOL. Nicely done. Oh, hopefully one of the Mods will clean up those MS Word tags at the beginning of the dairy. To avoid this, in the future, copy everything from Word into NotePad (or the like) to remove all of the background formatting that word processing applications use. Then, paste everything, from NotePad, into the diary text box (on MGoBlog).

Joined: 08/20/2008

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bronxblue

January 19th, 2010 at 3:46 PM ^

Good stuff, and I think you might be giving MSU hostesses a bit less credit than they deserve - they probably wouldn't eat the cupcakes, but instead bury it in the hopes that a cupcake tree would grow and there would be more sugary, sweet snackcakes than they could ever dream of.

Joined: 11/22/2008

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MGOARMY

January 20th, 2010 at 12:25 PM ^

"He stated that between his two offers, cupcakes from USC and the full-ride at Michigan State, he wasn’t sure which was more attractive." That line made me cry I was laughing so hard, well done.

Joined: 06/22/2009

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