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Introducing the option: THE KNOWLEDGE SECTION

By THE_KNOWLEDGE — May 4th, 2012 at 9:34 AM — 31 comments

.
Many is the number of fools who have in the past tried to denigrate THE KNOWLEDGE - to their own detriment. This number has gone down significantly with time as more people have started to understand the greatness and exactness of THE KNOWLEDGE
.
Most people have finally understood that there is no better predictor of the future than the personality who understands not just the future, but the information on the future - i.e., THE KNOWLEDGE
.
yes
.
to the great euphoria of the readers of this blog, THE KNOWLEDGE has now made an appearance on these very pages after a few months' absence to make this post examining the past that allows people to make inferences that exhort them to think more critically about the future
.
because that, after all, is the most important thing most people can do with their e-lives
.
yes
.
consider this example from the recent past: fans on this blog are driven to insanity wanting to know if Trey Burke will return or go pro
.
many other such examples abound: will Levenberry choose Michigan? will Dymonte Thomas flip to OSU? will Meyer build a champion program at OSU? will he run a clean program?
.
the answer to all these questions is, of course, no - it's just that people know the answer to some questions for the events that have happened in the past, and can only guess on the events yet to unfold in the time dimension of this universe
.
yes
.
these people can easily avoid significant anxiety and uncertainty about the future, if they will simply appeal to THE KNOWLEDGE, the most accurate revealer of the future
.
however, the vast majority of people on these very pages have not taken advantage of this extremely rare opportunity that very few people get
.
yes
.
therefore, THE KNOWLEDGE has decided to provide an option to introduce a new feature to this blog: THE KNOWLEDGE SECTION
.
this will be a separate tab on this blog where people can ask questions relevant to Michigan sports (THE KNOWLEDGE will decide what is relevant), and THE KNOWLEDGE will answer them as he chooses
.
yes
.
the owner and moderators of this blog are, hence, asked to open such a section for the help of the masses
.
yes
.
THE KNOWLEDGE will continue to provide regular columns (as everyone knows, THE KNOWLEDGE does not comment or respond to comments on diaries) with increasing frequency as the football season approaches
.
yes
.

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May 4th, 2012 at 9:34 AM | comments (Score:5 Normal)
THE_KNOWLEDGE
Joined: 09/04/2009
MGoPoints: 803

commence

THE KNOWLEDGE

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May 4th, 2012 at 11:00 AM | You've slipped up (Score:5 Normal)
LSA Aught One
Joined: 08/24/2011
MGoPoints: 891

THE_KNOWLEDGE has referred to itself as a male.  This is the beginning of the end, my friend.  Now that we know this major bit of information, your true identity is sure to follow.  Today we know you're a dude, by tomorrow we will know where you grocery shop.  Next week, we will know the name of your dog and that your favorite song is likely Call Me Maybe. 

 

Yes.

 

 

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May 4th, 2012 at 9:57 AM | Comments (Score:5 Normal)
THE_IGNORANCE
Joined: 02/25/2012
MGoPoints: 24

Uncommence
.
WHAT DOES THIS GUY KNOW.

.
NOTHING
.
HE DOESN'T DESERVE A SECTION TO HIMSELF
.
THE ONLY MGOBLOGGER WHO DESERVES HIS OWN SECTION.
.
IS THE PARTY ROOM.

THE IGNORANCE

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May 4th, 2012 at 10:10 AM | Is this sarcasm?  (Score:-1 Normal)
profitgoblue
Joined: 09/01/2009
MGoPoints: 19416

Is this sarcasm?

[Edit:  Thanks to all who answered, and to those that downvoted an honest question.]

 

 

Disgruntled former moderator.  I got a lot of problems with you people!

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May 4th, 2012 at 10:14 AM | I would say that all THE (Score:1 Normal)
asquared
asquared's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 432

I would say that all THE KNOWLEDGE's post are intended for entertainment value only.

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May 4th, 2012 at 11:27 AM | My two guesses based on his (Score:2 Normal)
America
America's picture
Joined: 09/19/2009
MGoPoints: 465

My two guesses based on his name THE_IGNORANCE.

1.  He made the account to be the nemisis of THE_KNOWLEDGE which would seem to explain the comments.

2.  THE_KNOWLEDGE made two different accounts so he could argue with himself.

Frankly, I don't even know which seems more likely.

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May 4th, 2012 at 11:37 AM | Neither, actually (Score:4 Normal)
ChopBlock
ChopBlock's picture
Joined: 12/11/2011
MGoPoints: 1502

THE_IGNORANCE created an account when I commented that THE PARTY ROOM should be referred to as THE_IGNORANCE. Then THE_IGNORANCE created an account and said "No, that's me". So it seems to be that THE_IGNORANCE is THE PARTY ROOM's syncopant and has only indirectly to do with THE_KNOWLEDGE

"The straightest line from A to B is straight: From A to B"

"When you have Denard Robinson, you can have everything"

~George Walden

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May 4th, 2012 at 12:12 PM | I think he is patterning (Score:3 Normal)
a2_electricboogaloo
a2_electricboogaloo's picture
Joined: 04/21/2011
MGoPoints: 4096

I think he is patterning himself however, to be THE_KNOWLEDGE's antithesis, as his account looks fairly similar (no picture, same capilization/punctuation in the account handle and the signature being the handle).

USING GRATUITOUS AMOUNTS OF CAPS LOCK SINCE APRIL 2011

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May 5th, 2012 at 8:05 PM | Since THE_KNOWLEDGE's hermaphroditic nature... (Score:5 Normal)
Yeoman
Joined: 06/08/2011
MGoPoints: 2279

...was established above and the usefulness of entangled pairs in any explanation of time travel was discussed below, I think you mean to say

2. THE_KNOWLEDGE made two different accounts so he could argue with herself and she could argue with himself.

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May 4th, 2012 at 1:19 PM | The amazing powers of being a mod, (Score:5 Normal)
a2_electricboogaloo
a2_electricboogaloo's picture
Joined: 04/21/2011
MGoPoints: 4096

The amazing powers of being a mod, you can edit your comments after they've been responded too. 

That being said I'm fairly certain that it's a sarcastic account, posing as the "nemesis" of the knowledge, and as the general antithesis of MGoUsers..

USING GRATUITOUS AMOUNTS OF CAPS LOCK SINCE APRIL 2011

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May 4th, 2012 at 4:20 PM | And who the hell are you? (Score:2 Normal)
sheepdog
sheepdog's picture
Joined: 06/15/2011
MGoPoints: 811

And who the hell are you?

Username and password authentication is dead.  Touchless fingerprint biometric authentication for your mobile devices is here.

Help our Indiegogo campaign!

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May 4th, 2012 at 10:15 AM | Yes! (Score:1 Normal)
VAGoBlue
Joined: 01/02/2011
MGoPoints: 502

The more content the better. Especially for those of us aspiring to be FOTK.

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May 4th, 2012 at 10:27 AM | Knowledge (Score:1 Normal)
WestCBlue
Joined: 04/08/2009
MGoPoints: 577

You are all knowing.

Please tell me why I love your posts so much.

I can't help myself.

Explain this about myself, to myself....

Go Blue!!!!!!

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May 4th, 2012 at 10:28 AM | its like a chain letter (Score:3 Normal)
superstringer
superstringer's picture
Joined: 02/04/2009
MGoPoints: 1010

I mean, I find THE KNOWLEDGE's posts greatly humorous and a cute addition to all things MGoBlog.  There is a 99.999% probability that THE KNOWLEDGE does not, in fact, have any better foresight into the future than the rest of us, becauase any backward time travel of information likely violates the laws of physics and creates mathematically impossible scenarios.

ON THE OTHER HAND... well there ARE entangled pairs....

So, on the off chance that the 0.001% possibility is in fact accurate, I for one CHOOSE to bow in deference to THE KNOWLEDGE's greatness, so that, if some day THE KNOWLEDGE chooses not merely to predict Michigan sports future but, instead, the stock market or something and thereby gains ALL POWER and we ALL end up working for THE KNOWLEDGE, well then, why be one to spit in his face now?  He would remember and force you to work cleaning toilets or something, someday, you know, in Columbus.

Just sayin'.

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May 4th, 2012 at 10:29 AM | ding dong (Score:0 Overrated)
superstringer
superstringer's picture
Joined: 02/04/2009
MGoPoints: 1010

Yay!  Six hundred points!

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May 4th, 2012 at 9:41 PM | Einstein (Score:2)
Lets_Go_Blue
Lets_Go_Blue's picture
Joined: 10/06/2010
MGoPoints: 1762

He believed that "time viewing" was quite possible. Maybe THE KNOWLEDGE can see the future.

Football is both an identity and a terminal illness. A rhythm and a chaos and an opiate for the mind all at once.

     -Johnny Danbury (umichedme.blogspot.com)

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May 4th, 2012 at 10:54 AM | . yes .   (Score:1 Normal)
EZrider
EZrider's picture
Joined: 09/07/2009
MGoPoints: 124

.
yes
.

 

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May 4th, 2012 at 11:39 AM | THE_KNOWLEDGE, will I ever (Score:3 Normal)
brandanomano
brandanomano's picture
Joined: 09/05/2009
MGoPoints: 4419

THE_KNOWLEDGE, will I ever find love? and if so, is she/he pretty?

Special Teams means special times!

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May 4th, 2012 at 12:05 PM | Branda, swing both ways? I (Score:1 Normal)
flwolverine
flwolverine's picture
Joined: 06/25/2011
MGoPoints: -999708

Branda, you swing both ways? I live in Utah and would like for you to join my flock.

/s

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May 4th, 2012 at 11:43 AM | Bucket list (Score:5 Normal)
ChopBlock
ChopBlock's picture
Joined: 12/11/2011
MGoPoints: 1502

I've always wanted to be on the board at the instant that THE_KNOWLEDGE posts and comment before he can write "comments commence"

"The straightest line from A to B is straight: From A to B"

"When you have Denard Robinson, you can have everything"

~George Walden

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May 7th, 2012 at 3:06 PM | I have been hitting F5 (Score:3 Normal)
RowoneEndzone
RowoneEndzone's picture
Joined: 09/27/2008
MGoPoints: 3132

I have been hitting F5 frenatically  for about 2 years and 7 months.  After 3 keyboards and 7 carpal tunnel surgeries I still have not been able to catch it in time.  Take it from a veteran, I would find a different hobby.

"Wasn't that Michigan drive just great.  That's like Patton riding into Berlin." ~Bob Ufer

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May 4th, 2012 at 1:00 PM | I upvote THE_KNOWLEGE on (Score:1 Normal)
profitgoblue
Joined: 09/01/2009
MGoPoints: 19416

I upvote THE_KNOWLEGE on sight.  There is no one else around here like him.  Love him or hate him, you have to respect his originality.  I bet people thought Nostradamus was strange too . . .

 

Disgruntled former moderator.  I got a lot of problems with you people!

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May 4th, 2012 at 5:00 PM | what... (Score:-1 Flamebait)
matty blue
matty blue's picture
Joined: 08/01/2008
MGoPoints: 377

...a colossal twat.

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May 4th, 2012 at 5:35 PM | Haters simply cannot (Score:3 Normal)
theBigRagu
theBigRagu's picture
Joined: 01/01/2012
MGoPoints: 8

Haters simply cannot comprehend the all-reaching knowledge of THE_KNOWLEDGE. Some people can open their mind to the cosmos, others will just never understand

I just wanna dance

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May 4th, 2012 at 10:00 PM | "comments (Score:4 Normal)
OMG Shirtless
OMG Shirtless's picture
Joined: 08/16/2009
MGoPoints: 1505

commence"

Makes me laugh every single time.

I put up a tough front, but deep down I just want to be held.

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May 4th, 2012 at 10:09 PM | . (Score:1)
MichiganTeacher
Joined: 10/06/2011
MGoPoints: 297

This can only be a good thing.

Physics teacher in NY.

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May 5th, 2012 at 7:58 PM | ahem (Score:4 Normal)
Moe Greene
Moe Greene's picture
Joined: 08/01/2008
MGoPoints: 2140

Wouldn't the knowledge have known ex ante than brian isn't going to add a tab for him?

 

No radio. Nothing of value.

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May 6th, 2012 at 11:07 AM | An actual Michigan sports question, because I think this is why (Score:3 Normal)
MadMonkey
MadMonkey's picture
Joined: 04/08/2010
MGoPoints: 1723

THE KNOWLEDGE created this thread.  Please, Mr. TK, answer this question:

Will Denard Robinson be a finalist for the Heisman this year?

 

 

Your opinion has no value.

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May 8th, 2012 at 5:56 PM | Knowledge, prey tell (Score:1)
Charlie Chunk
Charlie Chunk's picture
Joined: 05/02/2011
MGoPoints: 613

What is déjà vu?

 

Don’t look back. Something might be gaining on you.  -Satchel Paige

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May 8th, 2012 at 11:17 PM | I am left to wonder how such an omniscient mind (Score:1)
Wolfman
Joined: 07/23/2008
MGoPoints: 537

does not comprehend that the question will Trey Burke return or go pro is not a yes or no question. Also, but to a lesser degree, still somewhat befuddling, doesn't knowing the future but also the information on the future equate to the same? Afterall, isn't the information on the future contained in the future itself?  Lesser minds just have to know. 

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