So, Orson asked the DOD to perform a flyover at his son's first birthday party.  I'm not going to weigh in on the merits of the flyover, but there are some key learning points we can all take from his somewhat flawed request. I deal with this shit at work, and need to let it out. Also might help Hoover over at NROTC get some solid flyovers next Fall.

1.  Flexibility is key.

Here, Orson has some positives and negatives. On the plus side, he's willing to accept any of the military's prominent demonstration teams. However, you'll notice in block 2 that he specifically requests only F-22 Raptors. They aren't based near Atlanta, Orson's hometown, thus requiring added logistical support. Accepting an AC-130 from Hurlburt or JSF from relatively nearby Eglin AFB might make his request more supportable. Perhaps even a T-34C Turbomentor from Pensacola.

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as 

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Kids, the military wants to help, help us help you and give us some flexibility.

Other negatives here: the request must be in at least 30 days prior. Planning is important.

2. Don't obviously lie.

Believe it or not, the people who approve flyovers are familiar with this form. Air Traffic Control approval is needed to fly in Atlanta's airspace--it's got one of the busiest airfields in the country. Honesty matters, regardless of what Jim Carey thought in Liar, Liar.

  NOT A CLASSIC!

3.  Okay, a little lying is okay.

Blocks 11-15, while seemingly innocuous, probably all need to be answered yes to be approved. Check that, the various public relations orders say they MUST be answered "YES."

Block 11. Does the local government approve? It approves by not actively disapproving.

Block 12. YouTube counts. After all, that's how this feedback was obtained:

Those guys aren't pilots anymore--probably.

Block 13. We know it's in the South, but seriously.

Block 14. See Block 13

Block 15. You aren't putting the Monty Burns' sun blocker up, right?

These are creative answers kids. Except 13 and 14. Don't be racist. Seriously.

4.  I think everyone is getting the point, but I've got one final thing to remind you of:

1:35 to a military pilot means either a) 0135 (1:35 am) or b) 0135 zulu (6:35 am on the east coast). Either would be a terrifying surprise.

Kids, anyone can get a flyover for their ridiculous public event. Just remember to fill out the form, give everyone 30 days notice, know someone important in the military aviation rank structure, and give some creative answers to very important questions. Work the system well enough, and you might just get this:

Get into the Air Force Academy and you might even get to see a flyover wearing those stupid hats.