Dave Brandon and Me

Submitted by dnak438 on

In another thread, I offered to post an e-mail exchange that I had with Dave Brandon about a year ago at the beginning of last season. I should probably explain that when it first happened I was too mad to think about posting it, and we were in the midst of a season, then prompty forgot about it during the off-season, when I should have posted it. But now Dave has pissed us off again, and with any luck we will be bidding him adieu soon, so it now seems relevant again.

So, to set the stage: it is the Friday before the 2013 season opener. Michigan had a big stupid Kraft noodle in Michigan stadium. The natives were restless, even MGoShoe. The noodle itself didn't upset me, but rather the slow creep of advertising into the stadium. So although I didn't think that my opinion meant all that much, I figured that I would let the Athletic Department know how I felt. I wasn't expecting a response at all, and I figured that if I did get a response, it would be some boilerplate like, "Dear X, thanks for your feedback and for your continued support of Michigan football! Go blue!" Instead I got snark.

I sent the same e-mail to Dave Brandon and to Brian Townsend:

Dear Mr. Brandon/Mr. Townsend,

As an alumnus and supporter of the University, I was upset to see in the Michigan Daily (http://www.michigandaily.com/blog/game/football/8-new-advertisement-blocks-big-house-view-29) that the Athletic Department is apparently planning to allow Kraft Macaroni and Cheese to advertise inside the grounds of Michigan Stadium.

One of the attractions and important traditions of the stadium experience, in my view, is the lack of advertising. Please do not allow this trend to continue. I would rather pay higher ticket prices than to be subjected to large orange plastic noodles and other such nonsense that significantly detract from my experience.
 
Many thanks in advance and Go Blue!
 
Yours sincerely,
[my name]
Associate Professor, [my department in the humanities, my university, which is in the AAU]

Dave's response (or perhaps someone in his office?):

[My first name],

I received your message and I am sorry you are "upset" over a noodle.

Clearly, this is a very troubling matter for you.

Perhaps the lesson here is for you to be careful not to believe everything you read. There was an event at the Stadium Friday and this promotional piece was included.  It was removed at the conclusion of the event.

I suggest you relax and enjoy the football game today!

Go Blue!!

Dave

My response:

Dear Mr. Brandon,

Thank you for your timely response. I am not upset about a noodle, however, but about the possibility of advertising in Michigan Stadium on game days now and in the future.
 
I suggest that you drop the condescending tone.
 
Go Blue!
Dave:
Thanks for your very helpful input!!
Much appreciated!!
Dave
 

 Brian Townsend's response:

[My first name],

Thanks for your feedback. Your message was heard.  

We are looking forward to another exciting weekend in Michigan Stadium. Go Blue!

Brian

 
My response:
Dear Brian,
 
Thank you! I was at the Notre Dame game (UTL II) and it was magnificent. I was very impressed with all the work that the Athletics Department does to make the games so enjoyable and seemingly effortless. I know that they are not effortless, and I want to let you know how appreciative I am of all your hard work!
 
Go Blue!
 
Brian Townsend:

Thanks [my first name].  We appreciate your compliment!

Go Blue!

I was upset about Brandon's response. It made me feel more alienated from the University that I love, actually. But here's the thing: it's just really, really stupid of him. He can think one of two things:

  1. This guy is an idiot.
  2. This guy is a reasonable person with strongly-held feelings about the University.

If (1), then the best thing is not to reply at all or to send some canned response: "Thanks for your passion! Go blue!" If (2), then the same, or something conciliatory: "Thanks for letting us know you feel, the opinions of fans and alumni are important to us" blah blah blah. I would have been satisfied with that. The only other time I e-mailed the AD about an issue, I received a very conciliatory note saying something like, "Thanks, we are already talking about this internally and we appreciate your input."

What does Dave Brandon gain from picking a fight with an alumnus?

I also think that his response was disingenuous, however. The fact of the matter is that the Kraft noodle was in Michigan Stadium for a promotial event, sure. But that promotional event -- cleverly called "W.O.W. Friday" -- is actually all about football (here's the official description of it). So it's not any old promotional event, but actually one directly tied to the football team and program. And despite the promotional tie-in, they charged $10 a person for access to the stadium! It wasn't even free!

It sounds like other people have had similar experiences to mine, perhaps even worse ones? I'd be interested to hear what other people have to contribute.

 

 

 

 

 

Comments

Shaqsquatch

September 23rd, 2014 at 11:22 AM ^

is on the main non-student walking path to the stadium and I have a large door wall in easy view of Main Street.

I'm seriously tempted to hang some signs with some choice words for DB on Saturday morning.

MGlobules

September 23rd, 2014 at 11:33 AM ^

and--indeed! Relax and enjoy your rogering, fans! I got this, 

Yrs,

(Dollar) Dave Branding

--

What has gone around is now coming around with a vengeance. I don't see this guy having much of a political future after this, either. Will have to go back making companies sleek and strong and putting working people on the street.  

 

alum96

September 23rd, 2014 at 11:46 AM ^

Did he really put quotes around the word upset?

That is so passive aggressive.  I should know because I've done that in strongly worded love letters ...like in my mid 20s. lol

dnak438

September 23rd, 2014 at 11:58 AM ^

poster. As you might have expected, it make me see red.

It's amazing... I've dealt with corporate customer satisfaction reps that were so good, I could feel my anger and annoyance melting away, even at local department stores. Only we have the AD who is uber-corporate yet finds a way -- no, goes out of his way -- to aggravate alumni.

roosterbaan

September 23rd, 2014 at 11:50 AM ^

david brandon is completely out of touch.

bill martin may have been a tad hands off, but he never marginalized the michigan experience just to make a quick buck. the worst he did was upgrade the stadium (which was direly needed) and try to upgrade the product on the field (you know, the real thing that brings fans into the stadium; not drones, fireworks, jetpacks, flyovers, skywriting, etc). while the upgrade to the product on the field did not work out, brandon has managed to downgrade nearly everything about the michigan experience, including the lack of respect in interactions with alumni and fans.

 

CompleteLunacy

September 23rd, 2014 at 11:57 AM ^

I mean, I think we all already knew that Dave Brandon was an asshole. But wow. Asshole does not even describe the person who replies to a respectful email like that. Asshole does not adequately describe the man who thinks that your email was from someone was simply " """"""""""""upset""""""""""" because of a noodle". DB thinks we're all naive idiots, and that's more troubling than how big of an asshole he is. I don't know of what single word could describe him worse though.

So instead I'll post the rant from Christmas Vacation.

 I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is! Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?

MGolem

September 23rd, 2014 at 2:08 PM ^

over and over again was one of the highlights of my youth...I had forgotten how amazing it truly was until now. That and thinking about Beverly D'Angelo cupping MY junk made that movie an absolute pleasure to watch.

MGoViso

September 23rd, 2014 at 12:12 PM ^

1) (Second chronologically) I met him at a tailgate at Pioneer (he was stopping by for a radio thing). Introduced my then-fiancee, he asked about school, he seemed interested in who I was (I knew someone in order to be introduced, but not a donor or someone he would be trying to win).

2) The April after Hoke was hired, I wrote DB a letter (snail-mailed) explaining my interest in coaching as teaching and requesting to shadow Hoke/DB for an afternoon or whatever. I provided my email, and he emailed me explaining that they get too many of those requests to honor them. I had listed my Saline graduation year, and he had a good personal touch with something like, "Always great to hear from a Hornet."

DealerCamel

September 23rd, 2014 at 12:31 PM ^

From what you said about DB "picking a fight" with you, I thought his email would be more along the lines of "Who the hell do you think you are, daring to question something I do?"  Whereas his first email seems, if anything, somewhat poorly worded.

You also notice he didn't bite on the "I suggest you drop the condescending tone" line, only saying thank-you for the input.

aplatypus

September 23rd, 2014 at 3:43 PM ^

I don't see a ton to be upset by besides the "upset" part. The poster was condescending in his first email and dickish with saying to drop the condescending tone. 

Outside of that I never got what the big deal was with a little potential advertising. I get that it goes against Michigan "Tradition" but isn't that similar to the type of things the same people rant about how Michigan and administration is often stuck in the stone-agaes? Or does that only apply to what we do on the field - so we should have a modern styled team, but everything else absolutely has to be stuck in 1902 or whenever it was and Michigan beat teams 102-0? I just never understood why advertising was the devil. 

thereverend

September 23rd, 2014 at 12:41 PM ^

I'm not so sure how much of this is just on DB. Somewhere in the middle of Lloyd Carr's era I remember getting a hot chunk of SPAM in a hot dog bun out of a SPAMmobile within the stadium gates. Perhaps if they were giving away GIANT Kraft Dinner noodles less people would complain?

CooperLily21

September 23rd, 2014 at 12:42 PM ^

I've been going nuts on Twitter about Dave Brandon and this is just more proof that my opinion of him is correct:  He's a stereotypical corporate CEO - egotistical, self-promoting and only focused on maximizing profitability because that's how they get compensated (bonuses are based on profit margins).  They think they answer to no one, especially Brandon in this role as AD at Michigan where the Regents apparently supported him up until now.

I'm not sure why people thought differently from the beginning, to be honest.  The moment he stated that he would be sitting in on Rodriguez's coaches meetings I knew he was a total asshole.  And now he's harming the Michigan name, the brand that he has been attempting to squeeze every last dime out of at every turn (eg. the macaroni noodle).  At then end of the day, its the Michigan name - the logo and trademark - that is the true financial value of the program.  And now the program is the laughing stock of college football.  GG Dave Brandon.

bronxblue

September 23rd, 2014 at 1:24 PM ^

I'm just going to throw this out there, and not to minimize your experience with Dave Brandon and the tone of this email, but this feels like an assistant handled this type of email.  I agree that it read a bit condescending (though honestly I could have read your emails the same way - such is the nature of the electronic medium), but it's also the type of thing that happens.  Brandon isn't paid to keep every fan happy, and it has been clear in recent years that his focus is on making money above all else.  Not saying it is good, but unless the University makes a decision to change that I'm not sure if this type of response will change.

BlueHills

September 23rd, 2014 at 1:35 PM ^

I wasn't upset about firing RichRod, but the way it was handled convinced me that we were dealing with an incredible asshole who was willing to publicly hang his coach out to dry with several days of "evaluations."

Every time Brandon opens his mouth, I hear arrogance and impatience with the complaints of the "little people."

He is a complete dick to the student body, he disrespects the alumni, and he thinks he's a law unto himself. His publicity stunts are just tasteless and stupid. He's a polarizing figure who's very good at alienating everyone in one way or another.

I'm ashamed to have him as our AD, and I don't trust his judgment. The fact that he's a lying sack of shit is the icing on the cake.

Other than that, I love the guy.

Vote_Crisler_1937

September 26th, 2014 at 11:21 AM ^

I attended the M v Wofford tournament MBB game this year with a former football player who introduced me to Brian Townsend. He was a very nice guy. Apparently my host and BT had a conversation at that game, away from the rest of us, where Townsend said Dave Brandon was a total ass to work for and that Brandon would never let anyone coach M who had the potential to "outshine" Brandon himself. This is obvious information to most of us here but it is entirely different for Brandon's own right hand man to say it. If Townsend is no longer there I am not surprised.



Sent from MGoBlog HD for iPhone & iPad

MGoVoice

September 23rd, 2014 at 2:07 PM ^

A few years ago at the Purdue game (in West Lafayette) a couple of buddies and I got there somewhat early and as we strolled up to the stadium DB and an assistant were walking by.  A big "GO BLUE" came from us and nothing from DB or his assistant, not so much as a nod of the head so say "hey, I acknowledge your existence."  I've tried to show some tolerance for much of his time as the AD, but the shit around the program has become an absolute circus, from draining every last possible dollar out of the fan base (to the point empty seats are now the norm) to free ticket give aways that the athletic department explains away as a sponsor issue.  Feel like so much more can be said but I am just done... 

SMJenkins3

September 23rd, 2014 at 4:07 PM ^

I ran into Bo outside of a Chili's near Seattle maybe 15-20 years back.  I was wearing a Michigan hat.  He went of his way, unprompted, to say "Go Blue" to me.  Nothing major, but made me feel like Bo probably did that to every Michigan fan he saw.

 

Or Amaker- I ran into him in LA (at LAX) when he was coaching at UM.  I gave him a "Go Blue."  He slowed down, put down his cell phone (that he was talking on at the time) and said Go Blue.

 

Nothng major here, but feel like a totally different expereince/feeling compared to your interaction with DB.  

 

turd ferguson

September 23rd, 2014 at 2:25 PM ^

I'm so sick of that guy.  This is completely consistent with every other story I've heard about DB and every other bit of evidence we have about his character.

I cheer for Rodriguez in Arizona, albeit passively.  If Hoke ends up someplace else in the coming years, I'll cheer for him wherever he is, probably enthusiastically.  With Brandon, I just want him to go the fuck away and not show up on my radar again.

TreyBurkeHeroMode

September 23rd, 2014 at 7:01 PM ^

Dave Brandon should be an NFL marketing executive where he could live his daily dream of putting football in and having money come back out.

Then, the rest of us could go back to the Michigan experience of putting some money in and having football and community come back out, plus some extra money left over to fund a volleyball team or two.

Mr. Brandon, we are not the University of Michigan's customers.

You Only Live Twice

September 23rd, 2014 at 8:52 PM ^

I'm not crazy about "money guys" because that's all they see.  Note that a lot of people look up to that.   DB doesn't seem evil, just unabashedly focused on the bottom line.  Do I like what he's done to the game experience, definitely hell no.  Very plastic and corporate, almost like our team on the field is a second thought. 

In the 1970s it was fun, it was beyond that, it was the exhilerating hightlight of every weekend.  The waning moments of halftime built up anticipation of our team coming back onto the field.  Now there's no announcement, the canned music just blares on.  If this is Brandon's doing it irritates me more than anything else he's done.   Music on the field should be from our marching band, no piped in crap.

  In the 60s my kindergarden princess self started attending games with my Dad, and the team didn't win a lot.  But I was so happy with my junk food, with just being in the stadium, and so was every other little kid around me with their Dads.  Brandon may have unwittingly done a lot of families a huge favor this season because tickets are so damn cheap, but he's alienating a lot of season ticket holders in the process. 

In the early 70s, my middle school Girl Scout self wrote Don Canham a letter, protesting the removal of Girl Scout ushers from the stadium.  They were starting to sell more tickets and we Girl Scouts were in the way and fans complained.  Canham dictated a brief letter in response, which he signed, explaining that the program was discontinued but that they donated tickets to Girl and Boy Scouts for certain games.  I still have that letter somewhere.

caup

September 24th, 2014 at 12:26 AM ^

I had a VERY similar response from Brandon re: uniformz.  That needlessly smug, condescending tone is unmistakably written by the same jerk who responded to me.

He appears to revel in pissing off and alienating anyone who even slightly disagrees with his decisions.

It's stunning how many people he's needlessly turned into enemies. Does he really think his current job is just like being a corporate CEO?  He must know that deliberately pissing off the alumni base is foolish, right?

 

Right...?

OMG Shirtless

September 24th, 2014 at 8:40 AM ^

 

I would rather pay higher ticket prices than to be subjected to large orange plastic noodles and other such nonsense that significantly detract from my experience.

 

 

This is ALL his fault!!!  Get your pitchforks.  We're storming every single AAU University until we find him and make him pay for these indiscretions.

/IfYouTakeOMGShirtlessSeriouslyYouHaveIssues