Breaking out in sweat over an alternate reality

First off, this story is really more of an admission that I have an unhealthy relationship with Michigan football. I should not be spending the mental cycles I do or even taking the time to post about it (not sure which is worse).

This panic attack occurred in the morning hours, shaving in front of the mirror. Of course you are tired, of course you are on autopilot; you have does this so many times before. Having watched spring practice video late last night, thoughts of our young quarterback comes drifting top of mind.

“You know, he did look pretty accurate… and that quick release… has to be much better than last year, just has to…” I fade back to reality to inspect a spot I missed before restarting my musings.

“… he also looked comfortable making a pitch as well, smooth operator… might be as good as his hype…”

The humming of my electric razor only briefly interrupts my thoughts as I shift to my neck, God I hate shaving my neck with an electric, always having to go back over areas to clean it up.

“…Ohio State is replacing 31 players… how in the hell will they be so favored at the end of the year?... Pryor didn’t even start every game last year… Freshman are not Freshman by that time of the season… Tressel is such a weasel… the fact that he spawned Douchetonio makes me hate him even more… jackass…”

Then, like cold water being splashed in my face, the realization of the strange QB recruiting path taken last year and the events that transpired this spring joined forces to jolt me from my quaint musings. It felt like that part of the movie where a bunch of scenes start to rapidly flash as some realization sets in for the main character. My head was spinning with my thoughts pinging around.

“Jesus, we almost had Newsome and Beaver. They seemed good on paper, but there were questions of mechanics with Newsome, another year of missed receivers. Beaver was pretty slight, had a shoulder problem. Newsome and Sheridan running the offense? Passing would be an afterthought, defenses would stack the line again. If we are projected 6-6 with Forcier, what would it be with those two? Jesus, could we have gone with a four win season after winning three games? Talk about the empire collapsing. How damn miserable would that be? I can’t have another imploded fall. If they were calling for RR’s head last year, we would be a media punching bag, what a disaster…”

Blink

“...”

As fast as it came, it all went as I returned back to earth to finish what I was doing in the first place.

“Do I have ADD? Why in the hell do I even consider this crap? Maybe I need a therapist, better put it on mgoblog…”