Home
i'm an actor, not a reactor

Primary links

  • About
    • $upport (lol)
    • Ethics
    • FAQ
    • Glossary
    • Privacy Policy
  • Contact
  • MGoStore
    • Hail to Old Blue
  • MGoBoard
    • MGoBoard FAQ
    • Michigan bar locator
    • Moderator Action Sticky
  • Useful Stuff
    • Depth Chart By Class
    • Hoops Depth Chart by Class
    • 2017 Recruiting Board
    • Unofficial Two Deep
    • MGoFlickr
    • Diaries, Windows Live Writer, And You
    • User-Curated HOF
    • Where To Eat In Ann Arbor
  • Schedule/Tix
    • Future Schedules (wiki)
    • Ticket spreadsheet
Home Diaries

Navigation

  • Forums
  • Recent posts

User login

  • Create new account
  • Request new password

MGoElsewhere

  • @MGoBlog (Brian)
  • @aceanbender
  • @Misopogon (Seth)
  • @Aeschnepp (Adam)
  • @BISB
  • @EUpchurchPhoto
  • @FullOfTwitt (Fuller)
  • Hail to the Victors 2016
  • MGoFacebook
  • MGoPodcast
  • WTKA
  • Instagram

Michigan Blogs

  • Big House Blog
  • Burgeoning Wolverine Star
  • Genuinely Sarcastic
  • Go Blue Michigan Wolverine
  • Holdin' The Rope
  • MVictors
  • Maize 'n' Blue Nation
  • Maize 'n' Brew
  • Maize And Go Blue
  • Michigan Hockey Net
  • MMMGoBlueBBQ
  • The Blog That Yost Built
  • The Hoover Street Rag
  • The M Zone
  • Touch The Banner
  • UMGoBlog
  • UMHoops
  • UMTailgate
  • Wolverine Liberation Army

M On The Net

  • mgovideo
  • MGoBlue.com
  • Mike DeSimone
  • Recruiting Planet
  • The Wolverine
  • Go Blue Wolverine
  • Winged Helmet
  • UMGoBlue.com
  • MaizeRage.org
  • Puckhead
  • The M Den
  • True Blue Fan Forum

Big Ten Blogs

  • Illinois
    • Illinois Loyalty
    • Illinois Baseball Report
  • Indiana
    • Inside The Hall
    • The Crimson Quarry
  • Iowa
    • Black Heart, Gold Pants
    • Fight For Iowa
  • Michigan State
    • The Only Colors
  • Minnesota
    • GopherHole.com
    • The Daily Gopher
  • Nebraska
    • Corn Nation
    • Husker Max
    • Husker Mike's Blasphemy
    • Husker Gameday
  • Northwestern
    • Sippin' On Purple
    • Lake The Posts
  • Notre Dame
    • The House Rock Built
    • One Foot Down
  • Ohio State
    • Eleven Warriors
    • Buckeye Commentary
    • Men of the Scarlet and Gray
    • Our Honor Defend
    • The Buckeye Nine
  • Penn State
    • Slow States
    • Black Shoe Diaries
    • Happy Valley Hardball
    • Penn State Clips
    • Linebacker U
    • Nittany White Out
  • Purdue
    • Boiled Sports
    • Hammer and Rails
  • Wisconsin
    • Bruce Ciskie

Links of Note

  • Baseball
    • College Baseball Today
    • The College Baseball Blog
  • Basketball
    • Ken Pomeroy
    • Hoop Math
    • John Gasaway
    • Luke Winn/Sports Illustrated
  • College Hockey
    • Chris Heisenberg (Class of 2016)
    • College Hockey Stats
    • Michigan College Hockey
    • Hockey's Future
    • Sioux Sports
    • USCHO
  • Football
    • Smart Football
    • Every Day Should Be Saturday
    • Matt Hinton/Grantland
    • Football Study Hall
    • Football Outsiders
    • Harold Stassen
    • NCAA D-I Stats Page
    • The Wizard Of Odds
    • CFB Stats
  • General
    • Sports Central
  • Local Interest
    • The Ann Arbor Chronicle
    • Arborwiki
    • Arbor Update
    • Ann Arbor Observer
    • Teeter Talk
    • Vacuum
  • Teams Of The D
    • Lions
      • Pride of Detroit
    • Pistons
      • Detroit Bad Boys
      • Need4Sheed
    • Tigers
      • Roar Of The Tigers
      • Bless You Boys
      • The Daily Fungo
      • The Detroit Tigers Weblog
    • Red Wings
      • Winging It In Motown
      • On The Wings
    • Michigan Sports Forum

Beveled Guilt

Site Search

Diaries

  • New
  • Popular
  • Hot
  • This Month in MGoBlog History - April 2008: No Spring Game at the Big House! Hockey loses to ND in the Frozen Four!
    Maize.Blue Wagner - 1 hour ago
  • Thirteen unlucky minutes (TL;DNR-This is a bit of rant about the refs)
    docwhoblocked - 2 weeks ago
  • Fan Satisfaction Index End of Season Bball Survey
    OneFootIn - 2 weeks ago
  • How likely are we to revert to the mean?
    Bo Glue - 2 weeks ago
  • It's time to avenge Villanova's 1985 NCAA tourney upset over Michigan
    Communist Football - 2 weeks ago
  •  
  • 1 of 2
  • ››
more
  • This Month in MGoBlog History - April 2008: No Spring Game at the Big House! Hockey loses to ND in the Frozen Four!
    Maize.Blue Wagner - 145 views
  • This Month in MGoBlog History - March 2008: Pryor isn't coming, Boren has left, and some academic fraud allegations sprinkled in
    Maize.Blue Wagner - 215 comments
  • 14 Months Ago: The Fire Beilein Threads.
    stephenrjking - 91 comments
  • PreSpring Football updates from Sam Webb
    AZBlue - 90 comments
  • Thirteen unlucky minutes (TL;DNR-This is a bit of rant about the refs)
    docwhoblocked - 61 comments
  • It's time to avenge Villanova's 1985 NCAA tourney upset over Michigan
    Communist Football - 11 comments
  •  
  • 1 of 2
  • ››
more

MGoBoard

  • New
  • Recent
  • Hot
  • Lacrosse Hosts #7 Hopkins, Noon, airing on BTN+
    1 replies
  • This Week/Weekend's Football Visitors
    21 replies
  • OT: NFL draft prospects with (state of) Michigan (but not UM/MSU) ties
    4 replies
  • Michigan basketball pursuing Pitt guard transfer Marcus Carr
    11 replies
  • Schembechler Hall practice field ripped out (photos)
    30 replies
  • The Evolution of Commerce - What Industries are Dying, What's Thriving?
    122 replies
  • Softball Wins Series Opener Over Maryland, 6-0
    10 replies
  • OT: How do some student-athletes finish a bachelors so quickly (to transfer)?
    56 replies
  • OT: Avicii dead at 28
    69 replies
  • Chase Young becomes highest drafted Michigan lacrosse player
    20 replies
  • Podcast discussion on the conference
    31 replies
  • Matthews Declares WITHOUT agent
    45 replies
  • OT - Jalen Hurts possibly looking to transfer
    118 replies
  • Game Day Condos - who's gonna buy one?
    71 replies
  • OT: Arsene Wenger set to retire from Arsenal FC
    51 replies
  •  
  • 1 of 7
  • ››
  • The Evolution of Commerce - What Industries are Dying, What's Thriving?
    122 replies
  • This Week/Weekend's Football Visitors
    21 replies
  • Michigan basketball pursuing Pitt guard transfer Marcus Carr
    11 replies
  • Lacrosse Hosts #7 Hopkins, Noon, airing on BTN+
    1 replies
  • RIP Earle Bruce
    53 replies
  • OT: Avicii dead at 28
    69 replies
  • Apparently, the NCAA has already received a response from MSU about Nassar
    64 replies
  • OT: NFL draft prospects with (state of) Michigan (but not UM/MSU) ties
    4 replies
  • Schembechler Hall practice field ripped out (photos)
    30 replies
  • OT: How do some student-athletes finish a bachelors so quickly (to transfer)?
    56 replies
  • Softball Wins Series Opener Over Maryland, 6-0
    10 replies
  • Game Day Condos - who's gonna buy one?
    71 replies
  • OT: Map of college stadiums that sell alcohol
    95 replies
  • OT - Jalen Hurts possibly looking to transfer
    118 replies
  • OT: Gregg Popovich's wife Erin dead at 67
    24 replies
  •  
  • 1 of 7
  • ››
  • Why should we be optimistic about 2018 M football?
    273 replies
  • Belleville coach Jermain Crowell mad at UM again
    244 replies
  • Police investigating Elysee Mbem-Bosse for death threat against Harbaugh
    224 replies
  • "Being Not-Rich at UM" Guide
    168 replies
  • Buckle Up
    159 replies
  • Scouting the Enemy: Ohio State QBs are Good
    158 replies
  • Semi-OT: What sports would you fix?
    158 replies
  • Elysee Mbem-Bosse disturbing tweets
    157 replies
  • Whats the Best Way to Make Flight Arrangements?
    149 replies
  • Urban Meyer throws more shade at Michigan
    141 replies
  • FB new Nutrition plan under Herbert is well received by players
    132 replies
  • The Evolution of Commerce - What Industries are Dying, What's Thriving?
    121 replies
  • What past season would you have liked to see an Amazon-style documentary on?
    121 replies
  • OT: best-selling musical artists by state of birth
    120 replies
  • OT - Jalen Hurts possibly looking to transfer
    118 replies
  •  
  • 1 of 7
  • ››

Support MGoBlog: buy stuff at Amazon

707oxford

Wife Day Advice for the Unmarried Reader

By 707oxford — September 28th, 2012 at 2:11 PM — 37 comments
Filed under:
  • advice
  • football
  • single
  • wife day

I celebrated my 10 year anniversary with my awesome wife this year, and we just had our second child 3 weeks ago.  As a man who is up to his neck in family obligations every day - not just Wife Day - I feel the need to render some advice for tomorrow's bye to those who have yet to enter this chapter of their lives.  You will find no "/s" tag here; I'm seriously...

First, sleep in.  When you wake up to the glorious mid-day sun across your bed, go right back to sleep.  Can't sleep any longer?  Just lay there and do nothing until you're hungry.  

Once hungry, go to the fridge and pull out something that no self-respecting human being would eat for breakfast/lunch.  See that left over piece of chocolate cake?  It needs a side of kettle chips.

Bring your meal to the couch and see how the noon games - which at this hour should now be in full swing - are going.  "But Michigan is not playing today!"  Stop right there and listen to yourself.  There is football on.  College football.  The Saturdays where you actually have the time to watch a full slate of games that does not include your primary rooting interest are numbered, and this is one of them.  It expires no matter how you choose to fill your day, so embrace it.  Enjoy it.

Now it’s time for the 3:30 games.  Hopefully by now you're realizing just how good you have it.  Things are only about to get better as now you are guaranteed to watch either Sparty or Ohio lose.  Any other week you probably take in at least part of their games in hopes to revel in some sweet schadenfreude.  Well today's your lucky day because one way or another, it's happening.

Hungry again?  Fight the urge to cook something.  You have a device within arm's reach that you can speak into and people will bring you food.  I suppose it doesn't really matter what you order, but again I would highly recommend anything that you will undoubtedly enjoy now, and likely regret later.  

By the time your food arrives, you should be ensconced in session three of today's games.  You may be thinking that this is an awful lot of football to watch, especially with Michigan absent from the schedule.  If so, I ask that you think back two months to when you would have done anything to see a live football game...let alone a conference game with division race implications.  Bonus: rumor has it that both 'Sconsin and the Huskers will be wearing awful unis.  Laugh at their Wow Experience.  Laze with peace of mind that it isn't our team playing dress-up this week.

As the games come to a close, start drinking (if you haven't already, which of course you have).  Libation of choice should be something that makes you happy, or better yet occasionally leads to adventure and/or trouble.  The night is young - go out, stay out, and don’t come back until the next morning after a sunrise breakfast at some greasy diner before sleeping through the NFL games and easing into next week.

If this advice strikes you as lazy, gluttonous, overindulgent, or all of the above, you're absolutely right. There are certain things in life that you are able to enjoy now, but will be superseded by other priorities in future years - be it quality time with the kids, a memorable afternoon with your loving wife, or simply avoiding "that look" from the mrs. any time you sleep more than her, eat too much of anything unhealthy, turn on your third game in the same day, etc.

Don't get me wrong - these priorities (the first two, anyway) are awesome in their own right and more than justifiably replace (most) football games when the time comes.  But for you, single reader, Wife Day is still on the horizon.  This is your time.  As I said, it expires no matter how you choose to spend it.  So embrace it.  Enjoy it.

 

I have to go change a diaper.

  • 37 comments
Powered by Drupal, an open source content management system
Theme provided by Roopletheme; sidebars adapted from Chris Murphy.