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A World Held Hostage: Day Five

By Brian — January 9th, 2011 at 12:45 PM — 153 comments
Filed under:
  • coaching fiasco 2011
  • flight-aware
  • jon gruden ha ha ha
  • rumormongering is what the internets are for

image

Les pun barrage avoided. The mandarins at LSU are sticking to their story that no one's talking to them about talking to Les Miles. The chancellor's version of yesterday's statement by the AD:

“No one has said anything to me,” Martin said. “But of course a lot of these things are done with agents now, behind the scenes.”

Just like LSU's recruiting. Hey-o!

It's contagious. Jennifer Hammond was patient zero in the Michigan edition of Fruitless Jon Gruden Naming but it's spreading: I have more than one account from actual sources indicating Michigan did interview him yesterday. With Gruden an interview is usually a brief conversation about how this guy makes more money than God by saying generic things on Monday Night Football, so don't get excited. I can't believe I'm actually relaying information about Gruden and Michigan but I guess if we've deployed flight tracking Gruden couldn't have been far behind.

If, like me, you've become inured to the constant Gruden-to-everywhere speculation that seems like it's been a major feature of American culture for the last fifty years you may be surprised to find out that he's a youthful 47 and could actually be plausible in a Pete Carroll sort of way.

Speaking of flights. So the winged helmet plane that touched down in Baton Rouge when Miles was in Dallas was there for all of two hours, then took off for South Carolina. What's in South Carolina? Um… well… a few days ago it was relayed to me that Lloyd Carr was in South Carolina. He supposedly has a vacation home at Hilton Head (restaurant to the stars!). The plane flew to… Hilton Head. It then went to a regional airport in Georgia, back to Hilton Head, headed out to Westchester County, and then went back to Hilton Head.

Ironically, Carr lit out for South Carolina because he was sick of people claiming he was the nefarious power behind the throne and just wanted to get away from everything and now a plane with a winged helmet painted on it is using his location as a hub. This is either

  • an amazing coincidence, or
  • David Brandon smoothing over Les Miles with Lloyd Carr and random incredibly wealthy NYC-based booster who is probably Stephen Ross.

Since a good source says Brandon actually is using the winged helmet plane—Dominos was a ruse!—I lean towards the latter; this seems like a fact corroborating the Les Miles buzz. I may have to apologize to Tiger Droppings.

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January 9th, 2011 at 12:49 PM
#2
Sgt. Wolverine
Sgt. Wolverine's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 3707
lol...wut?

Are we really going to have to get the "New Carr with Les Miles" signs out of retirement?

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:04 PM
(Reply to #2) #3
UMAmaizinBlue
UMAmaizinBlue's picture
Joined: 09/23/2009
MGoPoints: 21363
Why Not?

I just burnt my "Why Get A Carr with Les Miles When You Can Get Rich Quick?" sign, so gung-ho my friend. Gung-Ho!

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:39 PM
(Reply to #2) #4
Chunks the Hobo
Chunks the Hobo's picture
Joined: 07/22/2008
MGoPoints: 4065
posted from your high-school English teacher's desk

It's FEWER miles, dammit.

Brought to you by your local grammar hobo.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:46 PM
(Reply to #39) #5
great slight hope
great slight hope's picture
Joined: 09/08/2010
MGoPoints: 1385
But then it's not funny :(

But then it's not funny :(

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:49 PM
(Reply to #45) #6
Chunks the Hobo
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Joined: 07/22/2008
MGoPoints: 4065
But it wasn't funny to begin

But it wasn't funny to begin with.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:57 PM
(Reply to #39) #7
skunk bear
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Joined: 03/09/2010
MGoPoints: 1971
Who is Fewer Miles and where

Who is Fewer Miles and where does he coach?

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January 9th, 2011 at 2:04 PM
(Reply to #66) #8
tubauberalles
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 1101
Homonym confusion

It's actually Fuhrer Miles, which is an honorific for the same guy we're all talking about, not the name of a brother, cousin or random other coach.

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January 10th, 2011 at 1:12 AM
(Reply to #75) #9
peg dash fab
peg dash fab's picture
Joined: 11/22/2008
MGoPoints: 130
stop

just stop.  Godwin's Law.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:00 PM
#10
BlueDragon
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Joined: 11/14/2010
MGoPoints: 21718
Hypothesis #4580938

DB hits the road with LM to meet up with Carr and Ross to strengthen ties, interview, stroke fragile egos, and get the blessing of the old-guard loyalists.  Sound like a plan?

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:11 PM
(Reply to #3) #11
ahs22
Joined: 10/03/2009
MGoPoints: 18
Definitely possible but

Miles does have to be back in Dallas to speak at the AFCA event?

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:14 PM
(Reply to #14) #12
Bando Calrissian
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Joined: 07/02/2008
MGoPoints: 60181
He's speaking on Tuesday.

He's speaking on Tuesday.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:04 PM
#13
Rush N Attack
Rush N Attack's picture
Joined: 07/07/2008
MGoPoints: 556
"Tiger Droppings"?

That's really the name of the site? Can we rename the RCMB "Spartan Shit"?

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:53 PM
(Reply to #5) #14
Thurman Merman
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Joined: 11/23/2010
MGoPoints: 273
No, too redundant.

No, too redundant.

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January 9th, 2011 at 2:42 PM
(Reply to #59) #15
pkatz
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Joined: 01/22/2010
MGoPoints: 37411
Most excellent reply, Thurman

+1 to you!

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:05 PM
#16
KinesiologyNerd
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Joined: 02/10/2009
MGoPoints: 7699
So why did the plane even go

So why did the plane even go to Baton Rogue? Did DB forget Miles was in Dallas, and decide to go kick it with Carr for a wild night on the town?

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:07 PM
(Reply to #6) #17
jfoust81
Joined: 12/18/2010
MGoPoints: 239
it was said that the plane

it was said that the plane was carrying donated organs. so who knows. good luck figuring out if that is true or a big rumor.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:16 PM
(Reply to #11) #18
Glutton
Glutton's picture
Joined: 08/18/2009
MGoPoints: 2151
They can have my liver now,

They can have my liver now, for whatever that's worth.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:08 PM
(Reply to #6) #19
ahs22
Joined: 10/03/2009
MGoPoints: 18
Just a hunch but

maybe DB is in Dallas/Phoenix on the Dominos plane doing the interviews and its MSC who's going to speak with Carr/Ross in an attempt to sell them on les and his baggage or doing further research on that baggage to determine if she wants to nix the whole thing

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:13 PM
(Reply to #6) #20
UMAmaizinBlue
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Joined: 09/23/2009
MGoPoints: 21363
I Can See It Now

DB: "Hey Lloyd, you enjoying retirement?"

LC: "What kind of a stupid question is that?"

DB: "Haha, touche, old friend. Well, since I have agents everywhere interviewing people for this coaching thingamajig, I have free use of the Michigan jet. Wanna join me in Baton Rouge?"

LC: "Dreams are true while they last, and do we not live in dreams?"

DB: <awkward pause> "I'll take that as a yes. I'll pick you up in a bit. Oh, and bring some beads."

LC: "Tremendous."

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:19 PM
(Reply to #16) #21
M
Joined: 09/22/2009
MGoPoints: 279
If Lloyd's talking like that...

He should change his name to Kurtz.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:05 PM
#22
ThWard
Joined: 07/10/2008
MGoPoints: 4327
Fun fact.

Recruiting dead period tomorrow through the 13th.

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January 9th, 2011 at 3:06 PM
(Reply to #7) #23
Yinka Double Dare
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 6247
Considering our recruiting

Considering our recruiting has been in a dead period since at least Tuesday, nice that everyone else will have to join us.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:06 PM
#24
pdxblue
pdxblue's picture
Joined: 11/02/2008
MGoPoints: 649
Has it really only been 5 days?

It feels like it has been 5 years!

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January 9th, 2011 at 2:10 PM
(Reply to #8) #25
Captain
Captain's picture
Joined: 06/12/2009
MGoPoints: 12438
I haven't been able to sleep

I haven't been able to sleep since, so it's seemed like one impossibly long day of unending torment.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:07 PM
#26
vegasjeff
vegasjeff's picture
Joined: 06/13/2010
MGoPoints: 569
South Carolina?

Spurrier would be an awesome hire.

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January 9th, 2011 at 2:39 PM
(Reply to #9) #27
MGauxBleu
MGauxBleu's picture
Joined: 05/08/2009
MGoPoints: 1656
Wow

Agree to disagree.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:07 PM
#28
Topher
Joined: 07/05/2008
MGoPoints: 742
Make it stop, DB, hire

Make it stop, DB, hire somebody and make this madness stop. I'm on vacation between jobs and so I don't even have work to distract me from following every morsel of rumor and innuendo!

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:08 PM
#29
scotts0
Joined: 11/15/2010
MGoPoints: 2
damnit!

Why didn't I know about the jet being at Westchester County Airport??  I live 5 minutes from there!!

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:12 PM
#30
Buzz
Buzz's picture
Joined: 10/10/2010
MGoPoints: 399
Lloyd Carr

may be the smartest person living in SC.  From my mom, who retired to Charleston, and is now looking to get the Hell out of there:

"South Carolina is the capital of dumb."

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January 9th, 2011 at 2:36 PM
(Reply to #15) #31
MgerBlerg
Joined: 11/16/2009
MGoPoints: 2224
Figures that that's where we

Figures that that's where we go for advice.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:14 PM
#32
Snidely Doo Rash
Joined: 10/17/2008
MGoPoints: 248
So. DOes this suggest...

Gruden was interviewed in A2 as per the handsome waiter report on twitter?  Is it too early for a pint of Cinci?

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:15 PM
(Reply to #17) #33
SWFlaBlue
SWFlaBlue's picture
Joined: 09/14/2009
MGoPoints: 675
Never too early

for a pint of Cinci.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:15 PM
#34
GustaveFerbert
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Joined: 12/13/2008
MGoPoints: 1670
Folks cannot seem to separate speculation

from reality...

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January 9th, 2011 at 2:26 PM
(Reply to #19) #35
Michigasling
Michigasling's picture
Joined: 11/21/2009
MGoPoints: 7232
It's a question of not

wanting to separate speculation from reality.  Reality's no fun.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:19 PM
#36
Seth
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Joined: 10/14/2008
MGoPoints: 94461
I have from a source I trust

I have from a source I trust from among the company's mid-executives that Dominos would not allow Brandon to use a company-owned plane to conduct business for Michigan; it would be a violation.

The source also noted that he doesn't know of Dominos owning a jet for corporate purposes (they've rented) -- that their owned planes mostly carry small cargo. But he is less sure about that than the policy. He was amused that we were tracking their plane.

It seems infinitely more likely that we were chasing a cargo of pepporoni than Michigan's AD across the country.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:27 PM
(Reply to #22) #37
Kal
Joined: 07/10/2008
MGoPoints: 4606
Will the pepperoni be

Will the pepperoni be bringing mushrooms and sausage alongside? If not, I don't think its a good hire.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:57 PM
(Reply to #38) #38
Captain Obvious
Joined: 03/17/2009
MGoPoints: -465
Use of private planes

at all by public companies is becoming increasingly rare.  It's pretty amazing that DB has access as a former CEO at all, even if he is currently the non-employee chairman.  Shareholders have been freaking out about this issue progressively more over the years, voting out directors for excessive perquisites, etc.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:47 PM
(Reply to #42) #39
Chunks the Hobo
Chunks the Hobo's picture
Joined: 07/22/2008
MGoPoints: 4065
But personal use !=

But personal use != "conducting business for Michigan," yes?

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January 9th, 2011 at 3:06 PM
(Reply to #56) #40
Kal
Joined: 07/10/2008
MGoPoints: 4606
Damn, I envisioned a jet full

Damn, I envisioned a jet full of unlimited pizza too. I feel like this week is just dedicated to crushing my optimism towards everything.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:54 PM
(Reply to #42) #41
Zone Left
Zone Left's picture
Joined: 07/03/2008
MGoPoints: 16278
35 hours of flight time is

35 hours of flight time is pretty small when you're travelling across the country.  He's probably got about 10 flights depending on where he's going--especially since civilian airplanes count any time the engines are running--even on the ground.

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January 9th, 2011 at 4:59 PM
(Reply to #60) #42
HermosaBlue
HermosaBlue's picture
Joined: 08/05/2008
MGoPoints: 5001
True, but "engines running on

True, but "engines running on the ground" time is pretty limited when you're flying private.

Since you're not dealing with interminable boarding processes and people trying to stuff steamer trunks into the overhead compartment, the time from boarding to wheels up is pretty brief.  Add in smaller executive airports and not competing with commercial carriers for taxi slots, as well.

I've had the pleasure of flying private for roadshows for various bond deals, and it beats commercial on so many levels, not least of which is the lack of waiting around to leave.  You show up, you leave.  Pretty nice.

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January 9th, 2011 at 3:12 PM
(Reply to #42) #43
champswest
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Joined: 10/04/2009
MGoPoints: 18412
Does stretching time count as part of those 35 hours?

Just wondering.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:58 PM
(Reply to #22) #44
I_Will_Stay
I_Will_Stay's picture
Joined: 11/22/2008
MGoPoints: 16
Nice source...

Meanwhile, David Brandon, the departing CEO, will remain on the Dominos payroll for a while.  For starters, even though he’s turning over the reins to Doyle next Monday, he’ll earn his regular base salary of $70,621.83 for the month of March (the calculation comes from the 2009 proxy). After that, he’ll earn $25,000 per month in the newly created role of “Special Advisor to the President and Chief Executive Officer”, a position that will last through January 10, 2011. He will also continue to participate in the Annual Incentive Plan, and he keeps the right to use his “Yearly Aircraft Hours” on the company’s plane through the end of FY 2011, or until he stops serving on Dominos’ board.

from: http://www.footnoted.com/my-big-fat-deal/freshly-baked-employment-agreements-at-dominos/

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January 9th, 2011 at 2:25 PM
(Reply to #69) #45
Captain Obvious
Joined: 03/17/2009
MGoPoints: -465
The continued use

of the aircraft is the only non-market provision here.

The continued base salary is severance (golden parachute if u want to be pejorative, your choice) and is actually way below the norm - most CEOs get around 2 years of their base salary or a lump sum of a couple million. 

The special advisor bit is completely standard and again a pretty low amount - most are around 50-75k/month, usually for around 6 months.  Just about every outgoing CEO is kept on in a consulting role to help the transition to new leadership (*strongly resists urge to bash DB more*).

"Continued participation in the annual incentive plan" is almost certainly vaguely-worded to sound sinister.  In incentive plans, you have to meet certain performance goals to earn the bonus - if not it isn't deductible in amounts over 1MM under Code Section 162(m).  More than likely he will earn a pro-rated bonus based on his partial year under the plan.  Some severance agreements grant the entire year's bonus, but it's pretty rare.  He can't and won't participate in the AIC beyond this year.

As I said, continued use of the plane is odd and will piss off shareholders (and ISS, Glass-Lewis, etc.) quite a bit.  Some outgoing executives ask for weird shit though.  I had one DEMAND to keep his blackberry in his severance agreement.

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January 9th, 2011 at 5:43 PM
(Reply to #91) #46
Seth
Seth's picture
Joined: 10/14/2008
MGoPoints: 94461
I haven't talked to him again

I haven't talked to him again (it was yesterday afternoon). I think the gist was using it for business would be the violation.

Then again, he was pretty sure they don't have an official corporate jet, which apparently they do. I still believe him that the idea of Brandon flying on a Dominos plane to look for a new coach is, in general, pretty silly.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:20 PM
#47
AMazinBlue
AMazinBlue's picture
Joined: 10/12/2008
MGoPoints: 4805
DB may not be the smartest man in the world

but based on his stealth(see silent) workings thus far in this horrendous search, I highly doubt he would fly on a plane with a maize and blue paint scheme where any numb nut could see it upon landing and go 'hey, that must be the Michiga contingent looking for a coach.  They must be going to hire...'

DB better be smarter than that.  He better be quicker than he's been.  This process should have been handled over a month ago now.  I'm not sure of the rules behind the 7 days from the firing to actually hiring a replacement thingy.  That may be why the delay exists.

All I know is, if he doesn't hire Miles what is left of the rational portion of the fanbase will head asplode and DB might as well move into Carr's crib at Hilton Head.

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:23 PM
(Reply to #24) #48
Bando Calrissian
Bando Calrissian's picture
Joined: 07/02/2008
MGoPoints: 60181
You're telling me if you had

You're telling me if you had access to a plane with that paint job you wouldn't use it?  It's gotta be like Dave Brandon's Go Blue Soul Plane up there.

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January 9th, 2011 at 3:45 PM
(Reply to #24) #49
M-Wolverine
M-Wolverine's picture
Joined: 10/04/2009
MGoPoints: 42199
It does seem strange

That you'd keep everything so tight lipped, then say "our plane has wings!"

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:24 PM
#50
MaizeAndBlueWahoo
MaizeAndBlueWahoo's picture
Joined: 07/02/2008
MGoPoints: 32944
Lemme add to the

Lemme add to the stupidity insanity fun: who's Stephen Burke?  Anyone important?  I saw this flight scheduled from AA yesterday and thought nothing of it but since Hilton Head is suddenly a place worth knowing about: http://flightaware.com/live/flight/N81698

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January 9th, 2011 at 1:36 PM
(Reply to #25) #51
KinesiologyNerd
KinesiologyNerd's picture
Joined: 02/10/2009
MGoPoints: 7699
A quick search shows he went

A quick search shows he went to Colgate and Harvard, so not an alum. He's apparently the COO of Comcast (among other ventures), and is very, very rich. Interestingly, the plane in question is a small single engine plane. I'm thinking if it is THE Stephen Burke, he's just going out to have some fun in his plane.

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