It's a schooner.
Welcome To The Successories Conference
aaargh unnecessary comma
When Twitter blew up at noon I figured something inane involving Jim Delany had just happened—this is my default assumption whenever Twitter blows up and has always been right, even when Michael Jackson died—and good lord, inane doesn't even begin to cover it. You know this by now but to remind you that the people in charge of marketing the Big Ten are either very stupid or think you are very stupid, the Big Ten Divisions are called "Legends" and "Leaders."
So. A group of people responsible for turning the Big Ten Network into a spigot of filthy lucre so gushing it can afford to employ Chris Martin is also responsible for making the Big Ten the Successories Conference. They've created division names that signify nothing about the teams inside of them—the only way I can remember that Michigan is in the "Legends" division is that "Leaders" is part of the friggin' fight song and we're not in that division. Their inane names don't just start with the same letter, they start with the same two letters. They are unusable.
And they've done this with 15 minutes in photoshop:
Note the use of negative space. Also note how stupid it looks.
By comparison, the new Pac-10 logo would look badass on any soccer shirt in the world:
How can the same group of people responsible for creating the BTN be responsible for this? Obviously the visionary bits of the BTN arrangement come from Fox, with Delany and company the lucky nomads who parked their camels in the right bit of desert and now get to call themselves an emirate.
These division names do not exist. I'm not using them. Michigan is in the West. Ohio State is in the East. Wisconsin has to deal. It is immediately obvious which teams are in the West—the ones mostly in the west. Michigan can be Champions of the West, and no one has to think about how leadership is more about character than authority.
Can we make this a blogosphere-wide insurrection? Please? Everyone just use "East" and "West."
Remember when you'd go in your room and imagine that instead of a broken down tricycle you had a flying unicorn that could take you away from mommy and daddy's screaming? Yeah, this will be like that.
BONUS: someone on the twitters said "I'm pretty sure an ordinary @MGoBlog thread could have produced better logo options," which is true. So do it either in the comments or by email and I'll pull up the best five and we can vote on the Unofficial Big Ten Logo; I hope I can work out a deal with the winner so we can offer it to the conference for free, if only to shame them.
In 20 years, when the bubble that is college football popularity has collapsed, and this blog is dedicated to lacrosse or soccer or whatever the hell rises up, we can point to today as day 0. Just awful, and makes me want to not be a fan a little bit.
with Delany and company the lucky nomads who parked their camels in the right bit of desert and now get to call themselves an emirate.
Brilliant writing as always.
was able to work a shot at Qatar WC selection into this. Hilarious tangential comment.
I always get the urge to +1 (x 10^n) Brian when he comes up with these gems. Who says engineers can't write?
I will join in your insurgency, Comrade Brian. Viva la revolucion!
Also, MS Paint'd B10 logo to follow by 2:30 (13 min. away). I invite the good readers of MGoBlog to judge the merits of my work vs. the "official" logo.
Doesn't anybodies word mean anything anymore? 6 minutes late and counting. Come on Man!!!!
Just brutal. The colors are awful, the font is awful, the conference names are awful. The Pac-10 logo looks so much better its not even funny. They really missed the boat on this one.
the name of the conference has changed to "b1g ten".
I be damned if I can find the digit 2 anywhere.
My first impression was they started hiding a "12" in there, but couldn't find a way to put the 2 in and then forgot to take the 1 out.
Now I see the "10" (with the G as the 0), which is pointless, but not terrible.
I have a bigger problem with the division names, which are just awful, awful, awful.
When do we get to make fun of the stupid and confusing names of all the trophies they also announced?
Am I the only one who can't, for the life me, find the "2" in that logo?
I'm 99.9% sure there isn't one and there isn't supposed to be one. I'm not being sarcastic - I don't think a "2" is intended anywhere. The only visual cutesiness is the "G" which is supposed to double as a zero...I think.
The Big 10 Ten Conference?
If anyone can see an embedded "12", can you please try to explain how to find it? I need to be studying for a final, but I've commited myself to staring at the fucking screen until I see a "12", so help is appreciated.
Delany said on the show that the "12" isn't in this logo. Which makes the use of the 1 that much stranger.
Right. And, if the "G" doubles as a zero, you have a logo which sort of literally reads"Big 10 Ten." Why you'd need that 1 and G/zero in the "BIG" and then the "TEN" beneath it is beyond me.
But the G looks like a zero. So, not only is "Big Ten" spelled out using words, it is also spelled out numerically. It's like the Big Ten X 2. Makes perfect sense, yo.
Participant and Effort
Hugs and Kisses
Winners and Yay
Fingerpaints and Sandbox
Super and Awesome
LOL and OMG
Cash and $
Lloyd and Brady
I was reading through your list and was thinking that a perfect addition to the list would be the Lloyd and Brady division. Lo and behold you had that as the last one. Well done.
I say we do
Lloyd Brady and Tacopants
OMG Shirtless (headlined by UofM) and UNNACCEPTABLE (headlined by TUoOsu)
Heavens and Bolivia (where you go when pos or neg banged)
I can't believe they wouldn't name them after MgoBlog memes.
Every single one of these is better than Leaders and Legends. If only the Big Ten had hired your marketing firm and had the same lavish budget at its disposal, I'm sure it could have done just as well as you . . . .
Winners and Yay just made my boss ask me why I wasn't working.
Iowa would be in the Yay division.
Us and Them
It makes the logo bearable and yet hilarious at the same time.
Can you please have him holding up all twelve fingers, instead of just his thumb, so we can get a damn "12" somewhere in this friggin' logo?
Yes that is all that seems to matter is the 12.
We should have just kept Al Grivetti's original design and changed the number.
I like how the "B" looks like a Pac-Man ghost, and the hidden Batman-like figure in between the "E" and "N."
so disappointed by something that nobody should care about?
Division names that don't make a mockery of the Big Ten:
Great Lakes Division: Michigan, MSU, Wisky, Minnesota, Purdue and Northwestern
Midwest Division: OSU, PSU, Iowa, Nebraska, Illinois, Indiana
Also, lets get the San Diego Chargers powder blue out of the logo. At least use colors from teams within the conference.
If these were the winners? How horrible are the losers?
what would be worse than legends and leaders......
Mostly northern teams, slight amount of Northern teams
Helmet division, pad division
so that at the conference championship game no one will be able to notice that there's even a logo at midfield and people will be confused.
Can you even imagine it in grass (or turf)?
then we could use Brians leadership poster as the league trophy.