is there such a thing as an etsy genuis? if so, this is it.
Unverified Voracity: YMMFer Edition
Let's get some last basking in before Mr. Rational Analysis shows up pissed off about the punt with under three minutes left. Vijay of IBFC is a prince amongst men for bringing us an extra-heapin' helpin' of highlights this week. Please run over there and click copiously so that his high traffic marks are not exclusively bad bad video.
Almost makes you want to run around writing paeans about how Michigan is OMG THE BESTEST... but no.
Sam's crack investigative reporting also reveals that there was someone at the game who screamed "Robinson, you filthy goddamn pirate hooker!" I regret to inform you that this was not me.
Ian at Sweaty Men Endeavors details a phone call to his sister right at the end of the game that contained the following priceless exclamation [swearin']:
"YEAH! YEAH! OH HO HO! UNBELIEVABLE! MANNINGHAM, YOU MAGNIFICENT MOTHERFUCKER!"
I mention it because clearly the acronym YMMFer has entered circulation around these parts and you should probably know what it means lest I turn into TMQ.
Johnny of RBUAS, well...
So I'm sitting there with my brother, when all of a sudden this kid number 86 was in the back of the end zone with the ball in his hands, and I start thinking about football and Octobers and oxygen and why we breathe it. And I realized they're all pretty much about the same thing.
OMG REFEREE OMG!!! The rich, beefy irony of this...
This is from the official 2005 NCAA Rules and Interpretations guidebook:
Rule 9, Section 3, Article 2B - Interfering for or helping the runner or passer.
"The runner shall not grasp a teammate; and no other players of his team shall grasp, push, lift or charge into him to assist him in forward progress."
"Penalty - 5 yards from the basic spot."
By the way, the clock runs on an offensive penalty.
The following is a quote from Reggie Bush, regarding the last-second touchdown run by QB Matt Leinart:
"I just shoved him in there as hard as I could."
Excuse me while I go throw up. I'm literally having dry heaves as I write this. We won this game.
There Is No God
Jesus would not let a team that represents everything that's wrong in the world rip the heart from his mother's university. USC is a team full of drug dealers, rapists and violent criminals.
I'm jumping on the bandwagon... the atheism bandwagon.
This is a message for the throng of SC dicks from Brendan Loy's site who have come here to gloat. Go away. Show some class and let us wallow in our misery without rubbing it in. Jesus, you've won 28 straight and you still can't act like you've been there before. Oh, and one more thing... [picture of man flipping bird]
...is a delicious icing on Saturday's Mario cake. Instant karma. I mean, Notre Dame OMG literally never loses without blaming the refs! Whiners! OMG!
Can't we force these guys to root for someone else? It's okay to dislike Lloyd Carr and quietly hope he retires in the near future. It's less acceptable to call for his firing publicly--bad form all around there. But when you do this...
A couple of blocks from Michigan Stadium, a small group of fans in army helmets painted maize and blue stood with signs and literature demanding Carr's ouster. One man held a sign with a grainy picture of Osama Bin Laden and "Osama Bin Lloydin has hijacked Michigan football'' written above it.
... you should get your picture posted outside all the gates and be banned entry for life. By the way, I passed by these guys and they were indeed a "small group"... a small group of exactly two people. The Ann Arbor News published their names: Teague Orblych and Joel Getchner. Assuming those are in fact accurate, it's time to revoke whatever season tickets they have. And possibly send David Harris to their homes to gently explain the difference between a football coach and Osama Bin Laden.
So this is a habit. Big Ten Wonk helpfully pointed out that when Courtney Sims said something to the effect of OMG National Championship(!!!) recently that this was not a new phenomenon:
Courtney Sims, Michigan sophomore big man and fabulist, for his bold-â€”nay, Namathesqueâ€”-talk on media day: "I think we're capable of [winning the national championship]. I think we have the talent. If we just come together and play as a team, I don't think anybody can really stop us."
Yeah... I think we can all agree that Sims is the Michigan Basketball equivalent of that guy who shows up at Tim Horton's with a really big spoon. (Yes, that joke will only be comprehensible to Hockey Night In Canada viewers, so it's time to ask yourself "Why don't I watch Hockey Night In Canada? Am I a communist or something?")