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Unverified Voracity Should Have Signed With Barca So They'd Pay For The HGH Shots It So Desperately Needs

By Brian — July 30th, 2010 at 11:13 AM — 34 comments
Filed under:
  • 100% worst thing ever
  • 1966
  • creepy dwarves
  • desmond howard
  • hockey recruiting
  • junior vs ncaa: fight!
  • kenny chesney wut
  • lucas lessio
  • michigan state
  • stadium experience
  • statistical analysis
  • unverified voracity

SON OF A. 2011 forward recruit Lucas Lessio is now headed to the OHL, which sucks. I assume he's doing it because he doesn't want to move to the USHL's footprint or play in Junior B in his draft year. This is bad. Worse: Michigan's 2011 class is now Alex Guptill and they have to replace nine graduating seniors.

It's not quite as bad as it sounds since this year's team is going to be the deepest I've ever seen, but they are going to need four or five additional players and have scant time to add them in the accelerated world of college hockey recruiting. This might be what Red's three-year contract is about. We're having a JoePa problem.

At this point Michigan will be scouring the USHL for late-emerging and possibly older players to fill in the gap before the 2012 class, which does have a couple of high-end commits already, arrives.

LOL WUT. So here's Kenny Chesney hanging out with Desmond Howard and… um… some guy at Newsterbaan:

imageUnfortunately, this means two things: the creepy country dwarf is going to be involved with college football again this fall despite his epic fail last year, and Michigan is going to be involved with this fiasco. Whenever music gets involved with the Rich Rodriguez era terrible things happen.

Of all the lousy ways to save a buck. The general reaction to the AD's stealth decision to ban all water bottles, sealed or not, from Michigan Stadium…

WATER BOTTLE POLICY
All bottles (including all types of water bottles) are prohibited from being brought into the stadium. There are newly installed water fountains located throughout the concourse and complimentary cups of water are available at each concession stand that has soda dispensing ability.

…has met the same sort of reaction that Clark Griswold's boss got when he offered his employees the Jelly of the Month Club for Christmas bonuses, and I'm with the mob. Either the "complimentary cups of water" are soda-sized and the ban on bringing in bottles is an exercise in forcing people to wait in line pointlessly or they're little teeny cups that will be an unsuccessful attempt to make it seem like the ban is not the brainchild of some soulless MBA looking to maximize revenue efficiency.

I have a question in about this decision and am hoping the answers aren't unconvincing boilerplate about terrorism and people sneaking in drinks, but we'll see.

Vintage. 1966 is not a common year for footage to come from, but here's some stuff for the history mavens:

The point is probably that we're even discussing it. Genuinely Sarcastic launches a self-defeating argument about the amount of success Michigan and Michigan State have had in state. The numbers in summary:

Since 2008, the head to head scoreboard is Michigan 11, Michigan State 9.
Since 2008, Michigan has offered 38 in-state prospects, landing commitments from 16 of those 38 (42.1%).
MSU, on the other hand, has offered a staggering 73 players in-state. Of those 73, they've landed 38 (52.1%).

Same as it ever was except for some seriously pissed off you guys coaches at Renaissance and Southeastern, one of whom is now employed by Michigan State. That Michigan blogs are even putting the effort into State's recruiting, which remains as Motor City-tastic as ever* says all it needs to. Nothing's changed on MSU's side of the ledger—they mostly go .500 and hired a coach who went basically .500 before he arrived at State. It's Michigan that's concerned about their place in things.

*(Lawrence Thomas is a big get; to Rivals the rest of MSU's recruits are three stars, and not even high three stars: one player gets a 5.7 and the rest are 5.6 or worse, with three unranked players and a two-star. Michigan isn't burning up the charts yet but they are killing State, as they did last year and the year before, etc. Three of Michigan's four 5.6-or-worse guys (Sousa, Fisher, and Kellen Jones) are likely to move up.)

Scatterplots. If there's one thing Michigan State bloggers like more than bad recruiting it's not writing up a Worst Plays of the Decade list. But if there are two things, it's not writing up a Worst Plays of the Decade list and scatterplots. Here's a scatterplot of the Big Ten according to Football Outsiders' clunkily named F+ (they should call it deathbacker), which is basically an efficiency metric that adjusts for schedule strength, garbage time drives, and all the little details that can make PPG or YPG misleading. You will not be surprised:

f -scatterMichigan's offense was slightly below average and their defense was… significantly less eye-rending than I'd have guessed. I expected them to be hanging out with Indiana and Illinois on the Island of Token Resistance. The guessas to why that happened: Michigan missed three of the five crappy teams in the league: themselves, Northwestern, and Minnesota. Their schedule difficulty was probably the toughest in the league, especially since Minnesota had by far the worst offense in the Big Ten.

Etc.: If you didn't get enough of the worst plays of the decade, The Wolverine Blog would like to bring your attention to the Post-Apocalyptic Oregon Game. I'm going to go listen to some Morrissey now. Pre-Snap Read, which is apparently the guy who did the season preview for the NYT last year doing the same thing independently, ranks Michigan a job-saving #37th and says the team is "ready to take the next step," by which he means "first step." Who is Zoltan Mesko? Baby don't hurt me, no more.

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July 30th, 2010 at 11:24 AM | Some Guy at Newsterbaan (Score:1)
Wolverine96
Wolverine96's picture
Joined: 08/28/2008
MGoPoints: 1571

looks like Bacari Alexander.  Maybe?

"Well hello Mister Fancypants. Well, I've got news for you pal, you ain't leadin' but two things, right now: Jack and shit... and Jack left town."
 

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July 30th, 2010 at 11:33 AM | Bacari? (Score:1)
MGoShoe
MGoShoe's picture
Joined: 04/23/2009
MGoPoints: 18245

No.

LSA '89 - MBB Natl Champions, Big 10/Rose Bowl Champions | Maize Pages Wolverines on Twitter | @MGoShoe

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July 30th, 2010 at 11:41 AM | Guy at Newsterbaan (Score:1)
ATL Blue
Joined: 07/01/2008
MGoPoints: 38

I believe that is Greg Hardin, associate AD. 

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:34 PM | It is indeed (Score:1)
mad magician
mad magician's picture
Joined: 11/18/2008
MGoPoints: 241

Mr. G. Harden.  I'm stunned Brian doesn't  know him!  He's the guru of sports psychology at MICH and has been for quite some time. He's like Yoda to our Jedis, the Maharishi to our Beatles, the Tom Hagen to our Vito Corleones.  And so forth

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July 30th, 2010 at 3:07 PM | At least (Score:1)
OHbornUMfan
OHbornUMfan's picture
Joined: 01/22/2010
MGoPoints: 1835

Pops had a real war-time consiglieri!  Look what I got!!!

 

No offense, Tom.

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July 30th, 2010 at 1:08 PM | When I played lacrosse at (Score:1)
WichitanWolverine
WichitanWolverine's picture
Joined: 09/30/2009
MGoPoints: -9480

When I played lacrosse at Michigan, we had several meetings with Mr. Harden.  The man has some very powerful, motivational words and commands respect.  He isn't very well known in the Michigan community, but he is without a doubt a true Michigan Man.

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July 30th, 2010 at 1:00 PM | Greg Harden... (Score:1)
MGOer
Joined: 07/28/2010
MGoPoints: 87

...Associate Athletic Director

One of the most stand-up guys I’ve ever had the privilege of meeting. After meeting him for the first time, the second I saw him he remembered my name and some things we had talked about during the first time we spoke. And he is like that with everyone that he comes in contact with, he’s incredible. Tom Brady is quoted as saying Greg Harden was the reason he decided to stay at Michigan. He is a class act and a true “Michigan Man”. Take advantage of any opportunity you have to meet him.

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July 30th, 2010 at 11:25 AM | I like the reference to Leo (Score:1)
jg2112
jg2112's picture
Joined: 11/24/2008
MGoPoints: 5381

I like the reference to Leo Messi, Brian. Well played.

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July 30th, 2010 at 11:59 AM | During the World Cup I (Score:1)
Transatlantic Flight
Transatlantic Flight's picture
Joined: 07/30/2009
MGoPoints: 1054

During the World Cup I stumbled across that story, which is to me like soccer's Brock Mealer. Sorta, kinda. I am all for recruiting diseased 12 year olds to become future Wolverine stars.

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:57 PM | Growth hormone deficiency v. (Score:1)
jg2112
jg2112's picture
Joined: 11/24/2008
MGoPoints: 5381

Growth hormone deficiency v. car accident.

Yep, I can see the similarities.

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July 30th, 2010 at 11:26 AM | Kenny Chesney is a Guber (Score:1)
GVBlue_is_still_blue
GVBlue_is_still_blue's picture
Joined: 10/01/2009
MGoPoints: 3392

Kenny Chesney is a Guber Douche. And he looks like one too.

 Robinson also packed snow into a plastic bag for his return flight.
"Melted on the plane," he said.
 


 

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July 30th, 2010 at 11:59 AM | I don't know if you were (Score:1)
Glutton
Glutton's picture
Joined: 08/18/2009
MGoPoints: 2117

I don't know if you were going for goober, or uber douche, or if you coined the phrase guber douche.  Regardless, and apt description.

"But it is better to live here in sackcloth and ashes than to own the whole state of Ohio."

-- Lafcadio Hearn

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:18 PM | Haha thanks. Probably should (Score:1)
GVBlue_is_still_blue
GVBlue_is_still_blue's picture
Joined: 10/01/2009
MGoPoints: 3392

Haha thanks. Probably should be spelled goober, but I don't even know if that's a word so how can it have a proper spelling?

 Robinson also packed snow into a plastic bag for his return flight.
"Melted on the plane," he said.
 


 

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:19 PM | i believe that Guber is the (Score:1)
tripp welborne ...
tripp welborne identity's picture
Joined: 10/29/2009
MGoPoints: 7007

i believe that Guber is the root of the word Governor as in Gubernatorial.  this would mean that Chesney is the ruler of all douches.  i don't like him, but he can't be that bad.  perhaps he is something like the secretary of state of douches.  the guy that started girls gone wild, i think, is the GuberDouche or Ed Hardy.

Auwê ka hua`i lâ

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:26 PM | Excuse me (Score:1)
Sgt. Wolverine
Sgt. Wolverine's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 3514

I think you mean the administrative assistant of state.

Sportscenter.com raves: Sgt. Wolverine, "Michigan's biggest fan"!

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July 30th, 2010 at 11:27 AM | junkie phase (Score:1)
UMQuadz05
UMQuadz05's picture
Joined: 04/03/2009
MGoPoints: 1098

C'mon...gimme the top 6 plays...GIVE THEM TO ME!!!

Hail to the colors that float in the light-
Hurrah for the Yellow and Blue!

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:16 PM | co signed (Score:1)
KBLOW
KBLOW's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 3410

  

There are no corners in space.

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July 30th, 2010 at 11:51 AM | Am I the only one (Score:1)
tf
Joined: 02/05/2009
MGoPoints: 338

Who hears they're banning plastic water bottles at the Big House and immediately thinks it's the fault of our Patron Saint (Brian)?

http://mgoblog.com/content/fort-sumter

 

The unnamed older man who suffered the collateral damage is cackling gleefully today.  I will always think of the water bottle ban as Brian's Law.  I personally hold no grudge since, to the best of my recollection, the only bottles I ever brought to games with me contained Jim Beam and were secreted deep in my pockets.

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July 30th, 2010 at 2:22 PM | Brian's mad because he doesn't want to pay the 4 bucks to chuck (Score:1)
M-Wolverine
M-Wolverine's picture
Joined: 10/04/2009
MGoPoints: 30281

Then you have to get up, go wait in line, get back to your seat with a fury...it kinda kills the moment.

But seriously, first bad move by Brandon.

"I love him, he's a great coach, he's a great mentor, he's a great friend. He's every single thing you want a college coach to be, and he does it flawlessly." -David Molk

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:02 PM | MSU-UM recruiting in-state... (Score:1)
zoltan the destroyer
Joined: 10/28/2008
MGoPoints: 427

Looking at the 4 and 5 star recruits (Rivals) from the state of Michigan, MSU landed six of them in the five years preceding Dantonio. He's signed 12 in the last three years.

We've signed seven 4 and 5 star recruits from the state of Michigan in the past three years, and thirteen in the preceding five years.

Can MSU be happy that they are recruiting better in-state lately? Absolutely.

Are we recruiting "worse" in-state? Not really.

Does this mean ANYTHING at all in the grand scheme of our recruiting and should we be obsessing and worrying over it in multi-part blog posts? No.

 

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:22 PM | numerically (Score:1)
tripp welborne ...
tripp welborne identity's picture
Joined: 10/29/2009
MGoPoints: 7007

MSU pre MD - 1.2 4 or 5 star player from Michigan per year

MSU with MD - 4 4 or 5 star players from Michigan per year

UM with RR - 2.3 4 or 5 star players from Michigan per year.

Auwê ka hua`i lâ

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:06 PM | Ha! (Score:1)
Bronco648
Bronco648's picture
Joined: 08/20/2008
MGoPoints: 699

Pure Columbian Awesome (from a comedy standpoint, not a football standpoint):

I expected them to be hanging out with Indiana and Illinois on the Island of Token Resistance.

Nobody home...

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:11 PM | "I have a question in about (Score:1)
BlueGoM
BlueGoM's picture
Joined: 08/25/2009
MGoPoints: 2595

"I have a question in about this decision and am hoping the answers aren't unconvincing boilerplate about terrorism and people sneaking in drinks, but we'll see."

You are going to be disappointed.  I was at the stadium employee meeting and IIRC they mentioned the above, along with "financial reasons" ( more $$ for concessions folks ).

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:14 PM | Vintage 1966 (Score:1)
SysMark
SysMark's picture
Joined: 11/15/2008
MGoPoints: 5215

The voice of Bill Flemming just belongs with college football.  Throw in some Chris Schenkel and we're in a time warp.  There are good ones today but it is amazing how much garbage you have to listen to.

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:15 PM | Barca doesn't always get what it wants (Score:1)
CalGoBlue
Joined: 09/26/2009
MGoPoints: 174

Signed: Arsene Wenger.

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:18 PM | Three of Michigan's four (Score:1)
His Dudeness
His Dudeness's picture
Joined: 11/24/2008
MGoPoints: 12484

Three of Michigan's four 5.6-or-worse guys (Sousa, Fisher, and Kellen Jones) are likely to move up.)

Don't sleep on Chris Rock moving to a 4 star either. If he moves to DL rather than DE I think he would be a 4 star candidate.

or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing.

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:37 PM | Water Bottle Ban? (Score:1)
dmontag
dmontag's picture
Joined: 11/21/2008
MGoPoints: 26

This isn't really a "water bottle ban", it's a "outside water bottle ban".  I'm sure you'll be able to buy (for $4 or so) water bottles in the stadium, you just won't be able to bring your own in from the outside.

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July 30th, 2010 at 12:54 PM | And hopefully most of the (Score:1)
KBLOW
KBLOW's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 3410

And hopefully most of the bottles sold at will get recycled but will they allow empty containers in so you can fill up at the stadium?

There are no corners in space.

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July 30th, 2010 at 1:00 PM | Water Bottle Ban? (Score:1)
dmontag
dmontag's picture
Joined: 11/21/2008
MGoPoints: 26

This isn't really a "water bottle ban", it's an "outside water bottle ban".  I'm sure you'll be able to buy (for $4 or so) water bottles in the stadium, you just won't be able to bring your own in from the outside.

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July 30th, 2010 at 1:55 PM | This might be (Score:1)
ItakeHGH
ItakeHGH's picture
Joined: 09/03/2008
MGoPoints: 1023

Just might be the greatest title in the history of MgoBlog 

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July 30th, 2010 at 5:34 PM | They banned bottles, but did (Score:1)
philibuster
Joined: 08/10/2009
MGoPoints: 2746

They banned bottles, but did they ban bags??? One gallon Ziplock bag full of water. Problem Solved.

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July 30th, 2010 at 7:25 PM | RE: (Score:1)
Jim Harbaugh Sc...
Jim Harbaugh Scramble's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 427

The Wolverine Blog would like to bring your attention to the Post-Apocalyptic Oregon Game

Ugh. Anything but that game. I never felt worse after a loss than I have that day. I thought the App. State was the ultimate low, but I just felt like vomiting after the Oregon game, it looked like pros schooling 18 year olds.

I had to work that Sunday morning in Buckeye country and the box-score was prominently hanging in my face, adding insult to injury.

http://twitter.com/#!/JHScramble

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July 30th, 2010 at 7:32 PM | Nice 1966 Footage! (Score:1)
bobmurph
bobmurph's picture
Joined: 09/01/2009
MGoPoints: 1478

That's far and away the most footage I've seen from '66.  My uncle, Jon Kramer, started as a sophomore at DE in '66, and played until the opener in '68 when he suffered a career ending knee injury against Cal.  Didn't spot him in this video (#84), but I'm sure he'll enjoy this footage.  Thanks for posting.

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August 2nd, 2010 at 2:27 PM | Cheesy Chesney (Score:1)
Sethgoblue
Joined: 09/21/2009
MGoPoints: 26

They unveiled uber goober Chesney's football video on Sportscenter. It has two Michigan clips in the highlight reel, one of the players touching the banner and of manningham's dagger-heart catch from robo-Henne at Michigan State. That probably explains the photos on campus.

Not suprisingly, the slow country song works as hype-up anthem about as well as a Barney song. God help us if they play it at Michigan Stadium. If they do, it might fit in about 2 hours before kickoff when the kickers are warming up, that's how much energy it has. Again, not surprising.

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