It's not a tumor. Weird reaction from many precincts in re: Sunday Morning Quarterback's terribly exciting move to the big leagues. Dawg Sports is emblematically mournful:

I am left uncertain how to react. I would call for Matt's jersey to be retired, only we don't assign numbered uniforms in the blogosphere. I would put my meager talents as a songwriter to use in penning a Don McLeanesque paean, but, although the site is coming to an end, Buddy Holly will continue to cut albums, as it were, so such a dirge would be excessive.

SMQ himself erroneously headlines the departure announcement "SMQ Sells Out," probably because he and I and most of the leading vanguard of getting-towards-30 college football bloggers came of age in the Nirvana era, when "selling out" went from changing who you were for money to being paid, period. SMQ is not selling out by the former definition; we should welcome the latter.

I've got a pretty good idea where he's headed, a month or so ago I got pinged by an old associate in search of recommendations for a national, full-time college football blogger and feverishly recommended him. I assume that everyone else contacted responded in a similar fashion, and further assume he got the gig. I won't spoil the surprise, but rest assured that SMQ is going to a place where he will be compensated for his words and -- this is important -- be forced to post many more of them. He will not be turned into a drone that asks coaches how they feel about OSU's national title losses. This is a win-win.

Proposal. Tim Tebow went to Thailand, stole a baby, and did a Heisman pose in front of cameras, but he was evidently beat to it by this guy:

Seeing a civilian do this gave me an idea: all college football blogs that deign to have the sort of "about" page that contains a picture should find a baby and stiffarm the hell out of someone imaginary. Crocs optional. I am working on baby acquisition. Temporary baby acquisition.

We're hunting witches. Here's the Outside the Lines piece on Penn State's outburst of bad behavior in recent years:

Except for the "To Catch A Predator" tone of the voiceover, that seemed pretty fair: mention of the high graduation rates and acknowledgement of how many charges actually resulted in convictions, something that the list flying around the internet failed to do. (They should have ommitted Austin Scott's rape charges, as those never even made trial.)

The numbers are still high, though, and Paterno's combative, dismissive interactions with ESPN Chris Hansen were embarrassing. More embarassing: the interviews with the guys who live in the apartment where Anthony Scirrotto's posse rode rougshod over random engineering students, and the general reaction of the university ("clean up the stadium!") and local police force ("one guy gets a misdemeanor assault beef!") to what sounds like a situation that warranted far more.

Depth chartin'. I haven't seen this anywhere else, but Varsity Blue claims to have a copy of the first official depth chart. Interesting items[update: commenters point out this is just the same thing that was release immediately after spring. Oh well]:

• Starting SLB is listed as Austin Panter. SLB is Mouton or Evans, MLB Ezeh or Thompson.
• Strong safety is Harrison or Stewart.
• OL from left to right: Ortmann, McAvoy, Moosman, Zirbel, Schilling.
• Hemingway the other starter at outside receiver; Clemons listed as the starter in the slot (no freshmen yet: Jim Potempa is his backup.)

More detail over at VB.

UPDATE. OMG:

Bill Martin (Ann Arbor, MI) steered his Great Lakes 70 Stripes to three first place finishes in three races in IRC Class 1 on Sunday to grab first place in the Rolex US-IRC National Championship. Martin wins the second annual championship trophy and much more, a specially engraved Rolex Steel and Platinum Yacht-Master timepiece.

'I've finally won a national championship,' Martin said when told of his win. 'My wife has a national championship in the Cal 25 Class seven years ago. We're finally even.'

Martin attributed his three bullets on the last day to excellent crew work and to Bruce Nelson, his tactician for the regatta. 'We had impeccable crew work throughout the regatta and especially in the three final races. Every sail selection was perfect. We hit every lay line perfectly. Bruce and the crew were spot on for the series.'

At least it was all worth it in the end, I guess: one Rolex and one Rich Rodriguez later, everyone's happy. Except West Virginia, obviously.

Etc.: MDen redesign; 1994 Bo Interview from VB; To the workers go the national profits of victory.