no wonder we hired Hunter Lochmann
The industrious beaver-elf mulattos that sit next to the forge in my basement pumping out analysis after analysis of football/basketball/hockey minutiae dread the arrival of this coming Saturday more than any other, for it is then that I have no further use for them and set them free -- "set free," of course, being another way of putting "sell into Keebler slavery." I will then spend the summer tending their larva; in August the next generation will hatch and be introduced to their cruel half-cat, half-man taskmasters. Fettered, blindered, and abandoned, they will spend the next six to eight months of their lives painstakingly assembling the sentences offered in this space for your amusement and where the hell was I going with this?
Ah. Yes. Other than a scattered softball or baseball update, Michigan sports will reach the deep offseason after Saturday's spring game. This enterprise will trundle on. But how? With tangentially relevant posts of dubious value, recruiting updates, and more stat-bashing. The recruiting stuff is fairly straightforward, but the others are fairly wide open. The point: I'm taking suggestions. Currently on the docket, FYI:
- Full-fledged diatribe against offsides in hockey.
- The 50 Most Loathsome People in Sports
- The (Friedrich) Nietzsche Theory of the Heisman
- Application of The (Friedrich) Nietzsche Theory to Heismans of the past 15 or so years.
I may or may not replicate the extensive Big Ten previews from a year ago. Johnny from RBUAS may take that torch up, in which case I can do other things -- one only needs a single excessively detailed preview.
Anyway, there are four months here and we have to fill them all somehow. If you've got ideas, offer away.