Hokster: Wait, you offered Pat Fitzgerald $3Million? WTF? You're only paying me $2Million.
Brandon: Dems the breaks, big fella. Don't mess with the pimp hand.
All in favor of having him actually grow those sideburns say aye. That's everyone.
"Tate wants to stay (at U-M)," Mike Forcier told TheWolverine. "I didn't come with a moving van. Our intent is to do whatever is necessary for him to rejoin the team and become a student-athlete again. We haven't talked to any other schools and we won't until we've exhausted every resource here. But Tate wants to stay and we want him to stay."
This is the greatest hire in the history of college football. This reminds me of when Vince Lombardi hired Jimmy Johnson, except faster:
Fred Jackson will return for his 20th season at Michigan and will coach running backs under Hoke, a source said Thursday night.
This is flantabulous. It reminds me of when you take some sugar and some eggs and some caramel and combine them in a delicious combination that's like custard except faster. It's Hokediculous. It's like that except faster. This is amazing. This coach is like the Heisman in a body, except it's like the Heisman in a body in one of those movies with a virus—he infects everyone with the Heisman. Word. Flan. Flan is the word, except faster.
But seriously folks. The inability of nuclear war to eradicate Fred Jackson probably pushes that Heckulinsiksinaski guy to WR coach and kills the idea that Eric "Obvious Nickname" Campbell would depart from the hard-partying Iowa WRs. Either that or it kills the idea that Scot Loeffler would enter at QB coach. Not like any of this matters, anyway. If you're not an OL or QB coach offensive assistants don't really matter.
Defensive coordinator search now even more bleedingly obvious. Jon Hoke, brother of Brady Hoke and a key aspect of Michigan's strategy to make their coaching staff literally as much of a family as possible, says he hasn't talked to Brady about the Michigan DC job and is "unlikely" to end up in Ann Arbor. That's fine by me since he's spent the last decade as a position coach in the NFL and would be something of a wildcard if he returned to college.
So. Michigan has a lot of money left over since they're paying Hoke twenty dollars and some donuts and is competing with San Diego State for the bulk of its staff. There is a guy out there with crazy recent college credentials that also comes with a reputation as a fierce recruiter. He runs the Big Ten default defense, a basic 4-3 cover two. He turned Miami—Miami!—into an APR-obliterating, arrest-avoiding team. That's Randy Shannon, kids, and we know two things:
File on the ominous side of the ledger. So… uh… you know how Brady Hoke is a tough defensive-minded coach whose teams will run the ball and stop the run, boy won't they? Um… so… the thing is.
In eight seasons as a head coach Hoke oversaw one defense—this year's—that ranked above 84th nationally. Even during the miracle year at Ball State his team was sixth in the MAC. In fact, if you click that link and squint your eyes you might think the table of Hoke's defenses is the table of Greg Robinson's defenses. So… yeah. Um. Not to be a downer or anything. Also please don't bring up that the Graham/Malzahn combo obliterated Hoke's best team 45-13 and now Graham is at Pitt and has hired a couple Rodriguez assistants and I just feel kind of ominous about this whole section.
File on the happy side of the ledger. After nuking Navy the Aztecs rose to #12 nationally in the offensive FEI rankings. Michigan is still #2 even after the grim output against Mississippi State.
NOT ME. Probably. Look, so I might have had a bit to drink the past couple days but I can state with at least 60% confidence that this was not me:
I can recite pi to 54 digits, bitch. I'm Rick James.
The Process, conference edition. After consideration the Big Ten has declared that Legends and Leaders are awesome division names, thank you very much. This is emblematic of why the conference imploded on NYD: it is a league of ninnies. This space is going to stick to calling the divisions East and West even though North and South make more sense so Michigan can be Champions of the West.
Not so good. Tristin Llewellyn and Jacob Fallon are gone for the year for "violating team expectations." That ends Llewellyn's Michigan career; Fallon has an opportunity to return next year.
As far as impact goes, Fallon was only playing about half the time anyway and didn't stand out when he did. Llewellyn's loss will be more prominent. While it's impossible for anyone to replace his penalty acquisition skills with quite so much gusto, alternatives on the back line are Moffie and Clare. Moffie's been pretty bad this year—a turnover machine—and Clare has been on the back burner most of the season as Michigan tries to juggle eight defensemen. He'll probably benefit from the increased availability of playing time more than Moffie.
Etc.: Pat Fitzgerald's agent would like you to know that Michigan was probably going to offer Fitzgerald three million a year as part of their sham effort to make it look like other people were being considered. Brady Hoke buyout blah blah.
Hokster: Wait, you offered Pat Fitzgerald $3Million? WTF? You're only paying me $2Million.
Brandon: Dems the breaks, big fella. Don't mess with the pimp hand.
re: Pimp Hand
This term has been suspended pending results from Brady Hoke coaching tenure.
It appears from the chart in BWS that Brian was looking at Rushing defense rankings, not overall defensive ranking. But still, the same overall point struck me when I was reading the Hoke profile on maizenbrew well before the Hoke hire: for a guy who talks big defensive talk, his results don't walk the walk.
Edit: actually, I screwed up, not Brian. As another poster pointed out, the broad context was Hoke as a supposed run-the-ball/stop-the-run guy, meaning that the relevant stat was indeed rush defense.
Brian is warming up to the Hoke hire.
or at least half way back. I suspect it will take most of us a few days or longer to readjust our thinking/feelings and come to grips with reality and move on. After all, we are all still Michigan fans, right?
being sarcastic. From the tone of what Brian wrote, it was meh, or whatever, at best. Which, I guess, is a little bit of a thaw, but just a little.
Regarding "readjusting our thinking/feelings" and "coming to grip with reality" I assume you mean coming to accept Hoke as the head coach, which is fine. As fans, I think we all hope he succeeds.
But this hire by the AD is troubling. I think most would conceed that Hoke would not be hired by any of the top 20 programs at this point in his career; Hoke was not on the radar even on mid-level programs looking for a coach at the end of the season, like Minnesota. At this point in his career, I just don't see Hoke being hired by these top programs, those with national championship asperations.
It seems that Hoke's primary qualification was being a head coach who was already a "Michigan Man," that he "gets Michigan," etc. (I won't mention the worse reason ever given for a head coach hire, that he already knows the words to the school's fight song). But why was this?
There have been a lot of references about "schisms" or divides within the program (or the entire athletic department). That Rodriguez and his staff didn't fit in. If the culture within the program is such that it takes a "Michigan Man" to "get Michigan" then yeah, the athletic department had a problem, but perhaps with the program's culture, not the head coach. Is Michigan's culture is so foreign from all of the other programs out the that only those that have passed through the program can find success as our head coach? That seems to be the conclusion to Brandon's remarks and process, as well as much that preceeded it.
I thought that Drew Sharp's questioning of Hoke regarding goals (Big 10 versus NC) was so damn ironic. This will likely upset some here, but this was exactly the kind of hire that one would expect a regional program to make, not a program with NC aspirations.
Rodriquez' hire was one of great aspirations both on the field and culturally. For whatever reasons, it failed. Perhaps Hoke's, with both lower expectations and aspirations, will succeed.
Rich was naive in his "we do this my way" approach, AND Bill Martin seemingly did nothing to ease / manage the culture shift.
In the end, we had a program that needed improvement, not a complete overhaul, and Rich attempted a complete overhaul. If he had come in, embraced Michigan history from the start (instead of the Lion King "it's in the past, it doesn't matter" story), kept more of Lloyd's staff, and went for a rip and replace on the offense and conditioning, while maybe leveraging a mix of existing staff and new staff to improve the defense, but retain "how to defend against B1G opponents" knowledge ... and then if Martin had been able to push a similar hearts and minds campaign ... well things may have gone differently.
Rodriquez was a "my way or the highway" type of coach over the average BCS coach. But someone who has had the success that RR had when he arrived can't be blamed by using the same approach that brought him that success. I suspect that most successful BCS coaches are that way - Bo certainly was, as was Bear Bryant, Nick Saban and Charlie Weis (well, forget about that last one) . But the difference was Bo won in his first year, RR didn't. Bo acknowledged that there was a lot of talent on that team. I don't think there was anything near that when RR took over.
I don't know how much it hurt RR by bringing in most of "his guys" and letting Carr's assistants go. But I do think that the one RR failed to bring with him, his DC at WVU, probably had dire consequences.
I've wondered what would have happened if Carr had retired, as he wanted, after the 2006 season. Whoever would have replaced him would have been set up for a very good winning season, at least in 2007, thus at leastpartially establishinghimself. It alsowould have given the new coach a chance to try to address needs in the depth chart with that year's recruiting class.
The subtle kicks at Hoke are pretty annoying, and baseless at that.
As a former expat resident of the Netherlands, I would like to ave see what that eel flan might have looked like.
....ever done for us?
Also please don't bring up that the Graham/Malzahn combo obliterated Hoke's best team 45-13 and now Graham is at Pitt and has hired a couple Rodriguez assistants and I just feel kind of ominous about this whole section.
Yea, but I bet they discussed what they were going to get paid!!!1!! And.. and... I bet they need a map of Pittsburgh!!!
/my head still hurts
The chance Randy Shannon comes to Michigan is extraordinarily slim.
As thin as the zero point zero chance that Hoke comes to M from a few weeks ago? Hmmmm?
So you're telling me there's a chance...YEAH!
Perhaps Brian's statement re: Shannon is a clever application of MGoReversePsychology?
I would welcome Shannon, but of course I will welcome anyone that is able to coach our defense better than what GERG was able to do.
Brady Hoke is just not intimidating when photoshopped to be Wolverine. He looks like a plump Joe Dirt. Or the character Chris Farley played in Billy Madison.
what if both the claws were photoshopped in? and maybe a snarl? and pouncing?
nah - I think you nailed it with Joe Dirt
Shannon seems like a no-brainer, but something scared the bejabbers out of Mack Brown and his family atmosphere when they talked to Shannon just after Muschamp left. I suspect the same thing would happen here.
As far as outside hires go, Shannon's the best available DC in my opinion. I remember reading after his firing about how he left hand written notes in many of his player's lockers. Shannon did a tremendous job reversing the negative aspects of Miami football, improved graduation rate, overall APR, etc. He definitely cares about the kids, and if he was interested in becoming the DC at Michigan, I'm sure he'd interview well.
Not the best season, but definitely my favorite of the 5.
Might as well call the divisions Mordor and Gondor because that makes as much sense as Leaders and Legends and both are based on fantasy.
This could work. Clearly, Tressel is Sauron. I guess that makes Brady Hoke Samwise Gamgee.
Do we know that amount yet? We're assuming it will be lower than most but I don't recall seeing it posted. Please enlighten me if it was.
In the initial presser DB said he got a 6 year contract but he wouldn't discuss the dollar amount until it became public record. Said something like "you can look it up yourself"
I know he's here primarily to play football, but he is (like everyone else on the team) a student-athlete. If he can't cut it as a student and meet minimum academic standards, well.. I don't know. The great thing about UM is our rich football tradition and our top-notch academics.
comment in his bowl interview (before grades came out) that RR's offense is perfectly suited to Denard and not so much for him. Then he gets himself into academic trouble. Then RR's offense gets replaced by Hoke's offense which may turn out to be more suited to Tate than Denard. Tate has got to be thinking, "Damn, why do I keep shooting myself in the foot?"
How many more dumb ass things can tate do.....(mope on the sidelines, fail out, tell people he's leaving on multiple occasions) before the Michigan community realizes that this guy just isn't worth it. If he didn't throw an interception on his first possession of every game, things would be different, but this guy is studying, acting and talking with the ego of a Cam Newton, while playing (when he is playing) like a Steve Threet. I'm tired of the Tate headlines. All it does is steal focus away from working hard and winning football games.
I would gladly take Randy Shannon but something tells me we're going to have some obscure person as the DC. Just a gut feeling, no inside info.
Then again, I was with Brian when he said a couple weeks ago that Hoke has a zero point zero chance of being the head coach. Anything can happen.
If Offensive Assistants at the position level don't matter... let's get rid of one and Focus Primarily on STs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111 it would be a ST Coordinator.
Okay really though, after reading this entry... i feel so much worse about this Hoke hire :( I don't know why yo, I just do.
I see no evidence in this column that Brian is warming up to the hire any more than he did after the presser. Unless you count the Fred Jackson imitation which is clearly sarcasm, although I'm sure Brian would agree it's a good move.
Sooner or later, he will join the HOKEAMANIC revolution! The time is now, brotha!
Feels more like a Reversion than a 'Revolution'. In any case, i hope you're right.
Not all thermidors are bad.
It's not a revolution, he's the slightly overweight son of the king who was third-in-line to the throne and was suddenly thrust in front in a difficult time of war. Time will tell whether he is overwhelmed and falls or grows into his role as rightful heir to the throne.
Either that or it kills the idea that Scot Loeffler would enter at QB coach. Not like any of this matters, anyway. If you're not an OL or QB coach offensive assistants don't really matter.
wait. so it matters? or no, wait. my head hurts.
David Brandon. Which leaves guys like Shannon and Tenuta completely out of the mix. The DC will be some relatively unknown guy with an indifferent resume who won't compete with DB for media attention.
and very possible. CEOs are known for their egos and need to be the center of attention. With Brandon relatively new to the AD position, it will be interesting as to whether he allows the athletics itself to be the prime focus, or him.
We bought into an image and reputation when he was hired, and some of the luster has faded with his handling of the last couple months. The real measure of Dave Brandon's tenure will be what he leaves behind - a corporate brand or an athletic program. We won't know for quite a while yet, unfortunately.
didn't buy-in to any of the DB BS when he first came on. I knew nothing about DB and therefore wanted something tangible to base my opinion on before I was willing to claim I had faith in him or that he had a pimpm hand.
To date, he has done absolutely nothing to make me believe he was a good hire for an AD. Also, I think the poster that suggested he wants the focus on him because of his big ego is right, but I would much rather go back to the days of Martin where the AD was seldom seen or heard. Hell, I'll even buy DB a sailboat if that's what it takes..../S
I am not ready to condemn Brandon so quickly and completely.
He handled the NCAA investigation in a particularly masterful way. He did a very nice job on The Big Chill. The game was scheduled before Brandon. But the game was a Brandon Production. Brandon made and executed the decision on lights, and the ND night game. I'm not terribly enthralled with night games, but I think a lot of peple are.
Anyway, if you are going to condemn David Brandon for the coaching search process, I suppose that's only fair, since Bill Martin did a basically wonderful job as AD, and is now being widely condemned as a failure because of Rich Rodriguez, which is at least two or three rotten misconceptions all rolled into one.
If DB wanted attention, he's got it for bungling the job search.
Couldn't agree more. DB is very close to going from "hands-on" to "constantly looking over the head coach's shoulder." Get out of the film room, get out of the weight room and let Hoke do his job.
to use the word "hypocrisy". Also I don't understand what your dispute is with the defensive stats he shared. All you did was confirm he was right then switch your argument to offense.
Brian was referring to Hoke's history of "stopping the run" and as mentioned below, the stats are for rushing defense. Other than the current year, his next best ranking was... 84th. Also, this past year the team was 57th against the rush, not 35th. But I can see why you might have thought about total defense, as it wasn't really clear until you look at the chart in the link.
Lastly, I'm happy you're so over the moon, if a bit put off with the aggressive nature of your posts. For myself, I'm hopeful, though not yet happy.
Brian is hung up on one statement Hoke made referring to the run option zone blocking as "basketball on grass". So showing the run defense wasn't that good is just focusing on skewering that one remark.
But as far as how other coaches perceive Brady Hoke, winning an award of "best coach of Conference X" means someone likes the job you are doing.
For me I'll know how close we are to Lloyd ball during the Spring Game. Since going to the Spring Game is the only thing I can control, I'm setting my goals on that, and not on "Brandon sucks for not hiring the guy I wanted"
And Brandon will fade from the limelight as soon as Hoke can step forward into it. Rodriguez unfortunately lost all his PR value losing to the Spartans this year.
Yeah, yeah, I get the point that the road to the MNC goes through the B10 championship, but if I'm a top 18 year old recruit who did not grow up watching Bo and Woody, it sounds kind of stuck in a time warp. As a top 18 year old recruit, I want to win the MNC. And I want my coach too as well.
Drew is that you ?
"Brian, I know you don't like the hire, but why keep raining on the parade of those who are happy (for the first time in a long time) about our future prospects?"
Or you could just accept that this is Brian's blog and that he is not happy with the hire and not comment on every single thing he posts. This is a two way street my friend.
It definitely is a two way street. You have made your views known, Brian has made his. Its his blog, he will continue to post what he wants. You dont have to comment on everything he writes just for the sake of argument. Thats not doing anything. I respect your opinion as well as Brians, but the arguing is getting tiresome.
Maybe its time that we all just accept others opinions (and title if you will), and just stop bitching about one another. At the end of the day you, Brian, me, all of us on this blog are Michigan fans and want us to win. Lets just concentrate on that.
Seriously, if you want to be happy, go read all the emo pieces on Detnews and Freep right now. This is the place you come to if you want arguments based on fact and logic.
Yes, as I noted in a previous comment, Brian apparently mistook rushing defense rankings for overall rankings. But doesn't it give you pause that Mr. Tough Guy defensive-minded former Bo player national championship DL coach has managed to produce exactly one defense that was even average at stopping the run?
I liked BH's presser, too, and I'm rooting for the guy and the team. But I'm not buying into head-in-the-sand optimism. It's clear that Hoke, like his predecessor, badly needs a top-flight DC to run the defense for him.